September, 2009

Luke sees Lorelai leaving the party out of the corner of his eyes, and he quickly grabs his jacket, following her out of the dance studio and down the street.

"Hey." He greets her by the gazebo, when he's finally caught up with her shortcut.

"Oh, hi. I thought you were still at the brunch."

"I wanted to talk to you for a minute."

"Oh?" She asks, happy to be around him in any context.

"I wanted to say something to you, but I didn't know how. I'm sorry to hear about your father. I'm sorry that I wasn't there – Liz and TJ were at Renn Faire when he died and I didn't find out until weeks after the funeral."

"Luke, it's alright. It was unexpected. And I got the flowers, thank you. They were beautiful." She says sadly and sits down inside the gazebo, on the bench they shared so many times before.

"How did it happen?" He asks slowly, and he really wants to know, even if it brings back terrible memories of losing his own father.

"He went to bed one night and never woke up again." She says, staring straight ahead.

"You know, I used to think that when he died, it would be all this pomp and circumstance. He was such an important man, everyone knew him. He was rich and educated and extraordinary and I guess I thought he'd die of some exotic disease, something rare that killed only 1 out of 25 million, and people would say, 'that Richard, he defied the odds even in death.' But no, he just died, like any old man."

"I'm sorry."

"Sometimes I wait for him, to call the house, looking for Rory because he's just acquired a first edition of a book she's been looking for."

"Or for you?" Luke asks gently.

"Yeah, or for me." She admits and he takes her hand in his.

"I feel…like I should have been there."

"You didn't know him very well, you had no obligation."

"I think I did. To you."

"Luke." She interrupts because he's being so kind to her and he's sitting too close and she's been waiting for him to do this longer than she's been waiting for her father to return from the dead.

"When I heard, I wished I could have been there. I would have, if I'd known."

"Thank you."

"How is your Mom doing?"

"He died in the pool house."

"Wow. They never got back together?"

"No."

"It must be hard for her."

"She's a stoic. Has to keep the house going, she says."

"Some people cope with it that way."

"It's so stupid, the two of them. Stupid, for so long. At least I got to talk to him a bit lately."

"Oh?" Luke is glad for her, he knows it's easier to find closure this way.

"He gave me the money to pay you back."

"Right."

"He gave it to me as a gift. And then later, when Liz gave me the check back, I returned it to him. And he was disappointed."

"Why?"

"I think he figured I'd go see you and I didn't even do that. I couldn't."

"Lorelai."

"Like father, like daughter." She adds and he watches a couple of lonely tears roll down her face. He then kisses her cheekbone and the tears are absorbed by his lips. She leans into him, slipping her eyes shut.

She needs this man.

"Times change, Lorelai."

"And do we change with them?" She wonders. He looks at her, into her eyes, past the wet eyelashes sticking on one another, into the blueness surrounding her irises.

She leans over and kisses his lips fully without any thought. Salt from her tears lingers between them and he squeezes her fingers in his hands as he kisses her back readily. The skin of her face is so soft, although when he pulls his hands up to her face and traces lines down it, he can feel the tiny wrinkles that have formed around her eyes. Years catch up with us all, but she's still so pretty to him. Maybe moreso today.

"I hope we change with them." She says after she pulls away.

He blinks and nods at her faintly.

"I should get going. It's been a long day." She tells him.

November, 2005

"My valet tells me you didn't come through the house. I take it your mother doesn't know you're here?"

"She's at her DAR meeting this afternoon."

Richard tips his glass of port at her. "It is Thursday, isn't it?"

Lorelai nods absentmindedly, preoccupied with the real reason she's here, nervous about having the conversation with him, how he would take it and whether she'd get what she came for.

"Well, what can I do for you?" He asks diplomatically while she fingers the hem of her sweater, picking tiny lint balls off it.

"Could you not tell Mom about this conversation later, please?" She sets out the terms of the meeting to him and he nods knowingly. He had her figured out at 'hello' like so many times before.

"You need money." He states flatly.

"No."

His face contorts with worry, probably as he explores all other possibilities for her presence here.

"I'd like to borrow $17,000 from you."

"So you need money." He exhales a sigh of relief.

"No, I don't need any money. I'm doing well, Dad. This is to pay somebody back."

"Oh?"

"I would like to square things off with our investors. I've had the business for over a year now, it's relatively profitable, I'm not hurting and I think it's time to have a clean slate."

"And you would rather owe money to your mother and myself?" He asks unbelievably. She knows it sounds like a load of crap and she doesn't blame him for calling her on it.

"So you can't lend me the money?" She asks tiredly.

"What bank do I write the check out too?"

She raises her eyebrows in surprise.

"Really?"

"I've learned long ago with you that I will never get the full story, and I'm a man of a certain age who realizes that he cannot win every battle in the business world or personally."

"Right." She says, all of a sudden taken over by a deep sadness for the man, almost 30 years her senior, whom she'd never completely understood, but didn't bother to understand either, who sat here in a pool house for as long as she'd had her inn, without the only person he'd ever really loved. Lorelai remembers Emily telling her that in 20 years she will have become her, except she sees now that she was wrong. She is her father's daughter, from his sharp business sense right down to his last misfortune.

"So, what will it be? The Bank of America?"

"Can you write it in my name? I actually owe $30,000 to an investor, and I've got 13 saved up, so I'll have to pool the money before giving him a certified check."

"Very well." Richard replies briskly and heads over to his desk, pulling the checkbook out of the top drawer. Lorelai follows him, fingering the smooth edge of the polished wood, as he signs the thing strip of paper with a flourish.

She's aching to say something to him, to tell him that she knows now how much of his daughter she is, and to ask him if he thinks they're both sentenced to this life of pretending that the world is still turning at the same speed when they both know it's slower and so much more painful.

"Thank you." That's all she says when he hands the check to her and she tucks it tightly inside her leather purse. He nods cordially at her and she turns on her heels, starts walking towards the door when he calls her name.

"Did Luke pull his investment out?" He asks neutrally, seeing straight through her even though she'd never officially told him Luke had loaned her any money.

"No. I just, I want to return it. In case he needs it. For stuff. Like a new pick up or if LL Bean is having a flannel sale and he's interested in wholesaling…" She yammers on.

"I see."

"He didn't ask for the money." Lorelai insists.

"He didn't seem like the sort of man who would."

"No." She says quietly.

"Then maybe you should wait until he does." Richard suggests kindly and she's surprised he's getting involved at all.

"He's sold his business, his properties and moved out of the state. It's time, Dad."

She watches her father take a deep breath and nod, conceding her point.

"I'm sorry to hear that."

"I didn't think you and Mom were particularly impressed by him." She shoots back, but not in an accusatory manner. It's just a simple statement of fact.

"Were you impressed by him?" Richard asks her.

"Yes…"

"Very much so, I imagine?"

She swallows the lump that's formed in her throat and nods.

"I'm sorry, then."

"Thank you." She manages.

"I don't expect repayment on that sum." He adds.

"Oh, Dad, no, you know it's important to me."

"Nonetheless, some things are important to me as well."