Chapter 8: Rage against the Machine

Dreams of Lacy plagued Draco every night for weeks. Some were repetitive, others weren't, but they all had her sleeping and him watching her. They hadn't really had any time to speak much in the last few weeks because of studies, and his prefect duties and quidditch practices. They'd said "Hello" whenever they saw each other, but nothing much more than that. It was the first Hogsmeade trip this weekend, the day after the Halloween Feast. Draco was in the mood for a feast and the trip to get his mind off of Lacy and school.

Pansy was becoming ever more persistent, and Draco had most of his classes with Potty and the Weasel and the Mudblood, but Draco also had those classes with Lacy. He'd noticed that most of the Slytherins didn't like Lacy, the girls were jealous and the boys angry that she'd denied them access to her. She didn't speak to anyone much, and she seemed fine with that. Pansy seemed very jealous whenever she saw Lacy smile at him or wave or even acknowledge him. Draco couldn't wait until tomorrow night for the Halloween Feast.

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Lacy had been having dreams about Draco ever since her first night. Sometimes they would be walking together hand-in-hand along a sandy beach, or flying on the same broom. Lacy couldn't understand why she was having these dreams. She was supposed to be the cold-hearted bitch her father raised her to be, but Lacy supposed that not being underneath her father's ever-watchful eyes had softened her up. She still never really talked to anyone, she had no need to. She was fully content being by herself, until her thoughts started turning to Draco. She couldn't like him, he was a Malfoy, but what did that mean? She'd learned everything from her father, she trusted him, accepted everything he'd told her without question, and did his every command without hesitation. She realized that she was more like his lackey than a daughter. Father's don't treat their children like this.

She'd never really had a childhood. He was in on the dark lord's plans, and after he fell, her mother said they'd retire to the country. No one suspected them as being in with You-Know-Who, and they'd stayed out of the public eye. Then her mother died, without reason, and her father changed. He seemed like he had no reason to live, so he started to study more and more. He'd push himself beyond the borders that he'd wake up days later not knowing who he was. He sent Lacy on little missions around the house, and torn up her dolls and anything feminine, and replaced it with spell books and dark magic. Lacy had been thrown into a position that she couldn't refuse. Her father taught her how to not show emotion, to block out everyone else out, to not have feelings, to be a drone. Not brainless, just very unattached. He had her dog murdered in front of her as a test to see if she could hide her emotion, and the first time she bawled like a child. The second time a single tear slid down her cheek, but the third time she had no emotion. Her training was complete, so to say.

Lacy paced the lake shore, she had several stones in her hand. She threw them furiously at the lake, instead of skipping them like she had first started to do. She screamed a long held scream that was aimed at her father out of her lungs and into the water. Lacy was still angry and seething, but there was nothing she could do. She was just waiting for a chance to yell at the next person that bothered her, no matter who it was. She stomped the grounds to the common room and slammed the door behind her so loud that everyone looked up at her. But, with one glance at her, and they all looked away with fear. Lacy stormed up to her room and slammed that door behind her too. Pansy was in there. Good, she'll no doubt say some stupid smart ass thing just to piss me off further. And sure enough, she was right, because the next thing that came out of Pansy's mouth was not welcomed to Lacy's mood.

"Oh, look. It's little Ms. I'm-too-good-for-anyone. Wonder what she's going to do now." Pansy hadn't been ready for it, nobody had been ready for it. Lacy just walked up to her and punched her in the nose. In one hit, she heard a definite crack and knew she'd broken the bone. Blood poured from Pansy's face and spilled onto the carpet, and Pansy's screams filled the rooms. Lacy looked over her and said, "What did you say Pansy? I couldn't quite hear you over all this loud screaming!"

"You bitch! You broke my nose! How dare you! AHHH!" By now several girls were in the room and grabbing Pansy and dragging her away to the hospital wing. Lacy sat on her bed, the remaining girls were staring at her like she was a freak. Lacy didn't care, but she wanted to be alone, so she rounded on them.

"WHAT?! What the hell are you people staring at? Do you want me to punch you too?" Lacy put as much edge into it as possible, and they all backed off and left. Lacy laid down on her bed and exhaled heavily. Not more than ten minutes had passed, and Professor Snape was at the door.

"Ms. Kilnern, we need to talk." Lacy sat up and followed him out of the girl's dormitories and out into the common room where everyone looked at her wearily. One glare at a first year sent her whimpering and all the eyes, except Draco's, vanished. Lacy looked at him, but she was still so angry that she couldn't look at him. She followed Professor Snape down to the dungeons where he lead her to his office. He motioned for her to sit down in a hard-backed chair.

"Am I to believe that you punched Ms. Parkinson in the nose?" He looked at her dead on. Lacy stared back. "Yeah I did." Snape continued to look at her, but didn't say anything for a few minutes.

"Are you aware that she now has a broken nose and it has to be mended by Madame Pomfrey?" Lacy smiled and nodded.

"So, is this a game to you? I will be writing to your father about this, he will know what you did. We have a no fighting policy here. I don't like it when my students fight. You'll have a weeks worth of detentions, if not more."

"No! I am fine with the detentions, make it all year if you have to, but don't tell my father. I beg you, don't." Lacy's eyes were wide rimmed and pleading with him, but he wouldn't budge.

"No, I am telling him. Nothing you can say or do will change my mind. Now, go straight back to your room. I have to sort out your punishment." Lacy stood up and left, but didn't go to her room, she went back to the lake. It was diner time, but she wasn't hungry. She stayed out and sat on a big rock alone, and away from everyone. She folded her legs up and wrapped her arms around them. She buried her head in them and cried for the first time in years. She hated crying, it made you weak, but she was so full of anger and no way to express it. The tears weren't sad ones, they were full of anger and resentment and pain and suffering and loathing and hatred of herself and her father of her life and what she had not done to stop it from going to hell. She lifted her head and wiped away her tears on her sleeve. Someone taped her on her shoulder and made her jump and fall off the rock and into the icy cold water.

Lacy's lungs were filled with water instantly, and the lake was deep here and she was already weighted down with her robes before she could swim. She was filled with water and couldn't breathe. She saw red spots behind her eyes and a big hand trying to get her. She wiggled out and tried to flee, but she had no oxygen and felt the arms encircle her before she passed out.

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Author's Note: Sorry I had to name it Rage against the Machine, I love the band. The Machine referring to her father and all his strict rules and how to act. I'm trying to lengthen my writing, so tell me if you like it. Burn. -Ash-