Run away!

This fanfic has been brought to you by the author Chameleon Freak!

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Pokemon. I just want a Moltres, and then I'll be happy.

Run Away!

Chapter 9: One Headache To Rule Them All

Ash woke up the next morning to the sound of shouts out in the hall. He sat up in his chair and tried to see who was outside. "I'm sorry ladies, but we can't allow any visitors at this time of day!" Ash glanced at his watch. It was only six fifteen. Whoever was outside, they sure were awake pretty early.

"Like, we need to get in room 519!"

"Yeah! Our like, sister is in there!"

"Were her family for like, crying out loud!" Misty frowned as she sat up in bed. She had been woken up a little earlier than she had wanted. "Who is it Ash?"

"Your sisters."

"Who?!"

"You know who I mean. The ones who use 'like' in every sentence."

"I know who you mean. I just never told them I was pregnant. I didn't want them fussing over me."

"I'll go tell them you're still asleep and that they should come back later."

But before Ash could, the door burst open and Misty's sisters, Violet, Lily, and Daisy darted in leaving a disapproving Nurse Joy in the hallway.

"Misty! Like, Congratulations!"

"Yeah! We're like, so happy for you!"

"Why didn't you like, tell us you were like, pregnant?"

"Umm…I wanted to surprise you?" Misty said sheepishly.

"Are you sure you didn't like, forget?"

"If you did, we'd totally like, understand."

"It would have been easy of you to like, forget with all that stress."

Ash stood at Misty's defense. "Hey! Could you settle down some? The babies are still asleep, and you woke Misty up!"

"Like, hi Ash!"

"How're you like, doing?"

"Why didn't you tell us like, Misty was pregnant?"

"Umm… I forgot as well." All three of Misty's sisters raised their eyebrows. They weren't buying it. Ash thought of a diversion. "Hey! You remember Brock. Don't you?"

"Like, of course we do!"

"How could we like, forget him?"

"He was always like, hitting on us!"

"Yeah. Well anyways, he's married now."

"Are you like, serious?"

"Are you like, pulling my leg?"

"You're saying he like, finally found a girl?"

"That's what I'm saying." Ash smiled. They'd forgotten about Misty already. "Anyway, his wife is in the room right across the hall. She had twins as well."

"I gotta see who it like, is."

"Me like, too!"

"Out of my like, way!" And with that, Misty's siblings sped from the room and into the one next door. Ash dashed over and closed the door. "So Ash, how'd you know May was next door?"

"I saw Brock go into the room across the hall. When he opened the door, I saw May inside."

"Oh. Quick thinking by the way."

"Thanks. Oh well. You need your rest. Go back to sleep." So Misty settled back into bed, positioned both babies so that they were comfortable in her arms, and drifted off into Dreamland. Ash decided to go across the hall to try and stop the sisters from bothering May. To his utter surprise, when he arrived, May was getting along great with the siblings. Brock was talking to Max, while May was in a conversation with Violet, Lily, and Daisy.

"So you're Misty's sisters?"

"That's like, right!"

"We're her like, flesh and blood."

"We're like, five years older than her though."

Ash walked over to Brock and Max, who were talking about their favorite superheros. Max had started this conversation no doubt.

"I tell ya Brock, Supermankey could kick Zubatman's butt any day of the week."

"Young innocent Max, so carefree in your youth. Zubatman is infinitely better than Supermankey."

"But Supermankey can fly, unlike Zubatman. All he has is a stupid utility belt!"

"Which makes him way cooler! I mean, if you have superpowers that's one thing, but if all you have are some gadgets, your wits, and your reflexes, you'd be so way cooler. Plus, Zubatman has a cooler costume." Said Brock as though this ended the discussion.

"I'll concede with the costume, but when I have an Uzi pointed at my head, I don't want reflexes, I want bullet impervious skin! Or in Supermankey's case, fur."

"But that's what makes him cooler! Anyone can fight crime when they know nothing can hurt them, but you'd be a lot braver if you only had your reflexes. Plus, look at the alter identity. Would you rather be a nerdy newspaper reporter who has to work all day and lives in an apartment or a billionaire who has a butler and lives in a gigantic mansion with a secret cave under it? Plus, I'd rather have Zubatwomen over Lois Lane any day!"

"Let's ask Ash what he thinks."

"Personally guys, I'd have to go with the Green Lanturn."

Ash was saved from Brock and Max's cries of outrage by, surprisingly, May.

"So Ash, have you met Abigail and Courtney yet?"

Ash turned and saw, two almost identical babies, on either side of May, peacefully slumbering.

"Awww… They're so cute!"

"Yeah. I was worried they were going to look like Brock."

"What's wrong with that?"

"I don't want girls with spiky hair and little slits for eyes."

"Good point."

"So how's M…" She stopped as she saw Ash, who was signaling behind the three sisters backs for her to stop.

"We don't want them bothering her."

"Like, who Ash?"

"Yeah. Like, who?"

"Who are you like, talking about?"

Ash made up the first thing that popped into his head.

"My invisible waffle friend, Squnkaboozle."

"You know Ash, maybe there was some truth in like, that news report."

"The one that said you were like, taken to a mental ward."

"The report said you were like, off your rocker."

"Misty owes me big for that." Thought Ash.

May smiled. "I think I hear someone calling you Ash." She knew Ash had just taken a dive for Misty, and didn't to make him prolong his agony. "I think you're right May!" He dashed out of the room. Max turned to May. "So May, do you like Zubatman, or Supermankey?"

Ash ran into the room and skidded to a halt. He plopped down into his chair and turned to Misty, who had woken up.

"You should have seen me."

"Why?"

"Your sisters were about to come back, so I pretended that I was insane in order to keep them away."

"What did you say?"

"I said I had an invisible waffle friend named Squnkaboozle."

"I'm sorry."

"Oh well."

"Would you like to hold Max or Taylor?"

"Of course. Which one's which?"

"This is your son in the blue. And this is your daughter in the pink."

"Oh. That was a tough thing to figure out at six thirty in the morning."

"Sure." She handed Ash his new son, Max.

"He's pretty cute."

"How could he not be cute?"

"Good point."

"Thanks. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go back to bed."

"That may be difficult."

"Why?"

"Like, hi Misty!"

"We're like, back!"

"These must be our like, niece and nephew!"

"Umm… yeah. They're kinda asleep right now. So you need to be quiet."

"We'll be like, silent!"

"Can I like, hold one?"

"What are their like, names?"

"That's Max, and this is Taylor."

"They're like, adorable!"

"Can I hold like, Taylor?"

"Can I hold like, Max?"

"I guess so."

"So Misty, are you like, tired?"

"Yeah. You must be like, exhausted!"

"You should get some like, rest!"

And with that, they handed Misty the babies, stood up, grabbed Ash by the wrist, turned off the light, walked out of the room, and closed the door.

"So Ash, why didn't you like, tell us?"

"We would've wanted to like, know!"

"She is our like, sister!"

"I…Umm… What I mean to say is…" Ash was saved the trouble of answering by all three of the sisters cell phones going off. They all answered concurrently.

"Like, hello? …Are you like, serious? …We'll be like, right over. Like, bye."

"Well Ash, we've got to like, go!"

"We need to get back to the like, gym!"

"There are some like, trainers there!"

The siblings dashed off. Ash walked back into the room May was in. He was surprised to find the debate continuing. Only this time May had joined in, voicing that The Flashroomish could annihilate Zubatman and Supermankey anytime. Ash immediately turned around and left. He walked back out into the hall just in time to see one of his relatives come rushing into the building.

"Oh Ash! I'm a grandmother!"

"Umm… hi mom."

"So, boy or girl?"

"Both."

"Twins! I'm so exited! What are their names?"

"Max and Taylor."

"Oh Joy! I must see them!"

"Sorry. They're sleeping right now."

"Oh. Well, everyone else should be here soon."

"Everyone else?"

"You know. David, Lance, Steven, Gary, Professor Oak, and Tracey."

"Oh. Umm… when will they be here?"

"Now." David, Lance, Steven, Gary, Professor Oak, and Tracey walked in and waved at Ash.

"Hi Ash! Thanks again for getting me out of the mental ward."

"Hi David."

"Hi Ash! Your mother has just told me the good news."

"Hi Professor Oak."

"Hi Ash! Man! You look tired!"

"Hi Lance."

"Hi Ash! You look like you were up all night."

"Hi Steven."

"Hi Ash! How's the baby?"

"Hi Tracey."

"Hi Ash! You look zonked!"

"Hi Gary."

"So Ash honey, why don't you tell them if it's a boy or a girl?"

"Okay mom. Misty had twins."

Everyone except for Mrs. Ketchum fainted in shock. Nurse Joy had been walking by at that exact second, and immediately rushed in with a crack team of Chansey nurses and lots of stretchers. After everyone had been taken away, Mrs. Ketchum turned to Ash. "So Ash. What about May?"

Ash saw his chance to get rid of his mom. "She's right across the hall."

He shoved Mrs. Ketchum into May's room, closed the door, and listened as Mrs. Ketchum got caught up in the superhero squabble. He sat down against the wall. Someone walked down the hall and stopped in front of him. "Congratulations Ash!"

"Thanks. Who're you?"

"I'm a psychotic nut case! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!"

"Umm… You seem quite sane to me."

"I know that!" He burst out singing, " But people say I'm a geek, I'm moronic plus I'm meek, an annoying pipsqueak, with an unfortunate physique! But you can call me…. the Chameleon Freak!"

"You sound familiar. Have I met you before?"

"Maybe you have! But that remains to be seen! But if you can't find it, who cares?"

"Are you okay? Actually, you do seem somewhat insane. Do you suffer from insanity?"

"No. I enjoy every minute of it! Ha!"

"You know, I was once put in a mental ward. Did you escape from one?"

"No! I'm just a pariah who likes to make belittling comments about himself!"

"What's a pariah?"

"A social outcast!"

"Why are you an outcast?"

"Do you really need to ask?"

"Not really."

"Good! I like to be clear! Translucent if I can manage!"

"Why are you here?"

"I just wanted to take a break from my busy schedule and say CONGRATULATIONS! But seeing as I've just said that, I'll just say this now! END OF DISCUSSION!" And with he sprinted out of the hall laughing hysterically. "Gosh. He's a psychotic nut case if I ever saw one."

He fell asleep against the wall and woke up a little bit later. He peeked inside the room Misty was in and found her rocking Taylor to sleep. "How're you doing?"

"Good. My mom is here. Plus, so are David, Lance, Steven, Tracey, Gary, and Professor Oak. You know, I just realized Max will be tickled pink when he hears we named one of our kids the same name as him"

"I guess you're right. Anything interesting happen?"

"Max and Brock are having an argument about superheroes. And some nutcase just stopped by to congratulate me. It was odd. He seemed really familiar. Like I knew him from somewhere, but a long time ago. In a galaxy far, far away."

"Bizarre."

"Oh well. So how're you felling?"

"Not as tired as I did earlier. How about you?"

"I'm full of energy."

"Glad to hear it."

"Nurse Joy said you should rest for the day, and then you can go home."

"Good."

The day went by pretty quickly. Everyone came by to visit except May, who was sleeping after the heated discussion. Ash's mom was so delirious with happiness, she fainted. David, Max, and Brock thought the babies looked like meatloaf and were instantly knocked unconscious by Misty and her long distance mallet. Lance, Steven, and Gary all thought they weren't cute. They too were knocked unconscious. Tracey sketched the babies and when he showed them to Misty, he got this response. "Taylor's nose isn't that big!" Tracey never knew what hit him. But in reality he too fell victim to the long distance mallet. Professor Oak, not noticing the pile of bodies, said the babies resembled small and skinny Mr. Mimes. He met the agony of the mallet as well. Then the nut case known as Chameleon Freak stopped by and said they were cute but not that cute. He was hit so hard he flew a foot off the ground. (A/N that's right! I had myself beaten unconscious for you people! I hope you're satisfied!) It seemed like everyone they knew had seen the babies that day. Misty was about to go back to sleep when three more people stopped by.

"Prepare for no trouble 'cause were on our day off."

"Make it double there's no reason to scoff."

"We're here to adore your precious infants."

"We think they're cute and they have diapers for pants."

"They're cute when they're asleep and loud when they're not."

"And when they make a stinky it smells like leaf rot."

"Jessie!"

"James!"

"Team Rocket blasts off at the speed of light!"

"Surrender now or prepare to fight!"

"Meowth! that's right!"

"WOBUFFET!"

Ash looked unhappy. "Quiet! You'll wake the babies!"

Misty didn't bother talking; she just introduced them to her little friend, Mr. Long Distance Mallet.

"Looks like Team Rockets losing consciousness again!"

"WOBUFFET!"

Nurse Joy came in to see who was making all that noise. "Oh my! Look at all of these unconscious people! I'd better get some stretchers!" And so she rushed out of the room and returned a few minutes later with a team of Chanseys and a whole lot of stretchers. After everyone had been taken away, Ash looked at his watch. "Uh oh! It's five minutes past ten! I can't stay up past ten! My metabolism won't allow it unless I'm hyped up on Pixy Sticks! I can feel myself falling asleep! I'm… losing… consciousness. Falling… asleep."

Ash slumped over in his chair. Misty smiled and nodded off as well. Meanwhile, over in May's room, Brock had come back and was holding Abigail. "You know May, I wish one of them had my looks. I've always wondered what a girl version of myself would look like. Probably really hot!"

"Don't get your hopes up."

"I can dream."

"What about your laptop?"

"You're right! I simply take a photo of you, scan it on to my computer, scan a picture of myself on, and edit your photo so you have my face and hairstyle! It's brilliant!"

"You do that. I'm going to bed."

May fell asleep while Brock worked furiously. When he finished, he printed out the photo and actually realized what he was looking at it for the first time.

"It's…It's…It's repulsive! Actually, I think it would be a curse for my good looks to be put on some unworthy girls face."

He shredded the picture, deleted the photo from his computer, and played pinball online. "I can never hit the ball with the flippers! How do people do it?"

The next morning, everyone who had been knocked unconscious came too.

David rubbed his head. "Man. I'd forgotten how hard Misty can hit! Hey, who're you?"

"I'm the Chameleon Freak! And if you'll excuse me, I must go continue to write this story! Farewell!" Chameleon Freak dashed off, waking everyone else up.

Max smiled. "I'm tickled pink that Misty named her boy after me!"

"Actually Max, I think it had nothing to do with you. I think it was just a coincidence."

"Awww… David! Why'd you have to ruin my moment?"

"I didn't want you to get a bigger head. If you did, you might not be able to support it with that scrawny little neck of yours!"

"Hey!"

"Is for horses."

"Why you!"

"Are both letters of the alphabet."

"I give up."

"The ghost?"

"NO!"

"Is what you use to smell."

"STOP!"

"Go."

"Please?"

"and thank you."

"For the love of all that's right in the world."

"Hate everything else."

"I'll kill you!"

"Unless I keep talking."

"AAAAAARRRRRRGH!"
"Is a good way to take out your frustration."

"That's enough David."

"Yes Professor Oak. Oh well. I'm gonna go home and put some ice on this wound."

Everyone else stood up and left as well. Meanwhile, Ash and Misty had already made their way home. "It's good to be home. Right Ash?"

"Oh how right you are."

"By the way. Don't forget about 'the talk'."

"I haven't. I'll do that right now." Ash called out all of his Pokemon.

"Okay. Listen up. We have two infants in the house. Charizard! They cannot be barbequed! Do you understand?"

"Char."

"Pikachu! They cannot be zapped! Understood?"

"Pika."

"Lapras! They cannot be frozen or squirted! Understood?"

"Lap."

"Bulbasaur! You will not use Sleep Powder, Stun Spore, Poison Powder, Vine Whip, or any other plant attack! Understood?"

"Bulba."

"Now that we've all come to agreement on that, next set of rules. If you want to play with them, you must ask Misty or myself. When you play with them, be gentle! We don't want to hurt them! Everyone understand?"

"Char."

"Pika."

"Lap."

"Bulba."

"Good. Now, you want to meet them?"

"Char!"

"Pika!"

"Lap!"

"Bulba!"

"Okay then. Lets go upstairs."

With great difficulty, they made their way upstairs. Upon reaching the room, the Pokemon walked from on crib to another, looking down inside and smiling. After they walked back outside, leaving Ash in the house, the Pokemon discussed the new 'things' they had just seen. So everyone at home can understand what the Pokemon are saying, I'll turn on my handy dandy Pokemon Translator 2001 Transmogrified Special Edition with THZ Surround Sound, twenty-nine Subwoofers, and a built in refrigerator with those tiny little hot dogs!

"Okay. Being Ash's favorite Pokemon, I'm the leader of this group. So let's open the floor to ideas on what those 'things' were."

"Pikachu! We all know your Ash's favorite! Don't rub it in. Look what you did! You made Charizard cry!"

"Wahiawa! Mph. Th..tha…thanks Lapras. You always stick up for me."

"Think nothing of it my friend. Even though you're a fire type, and I'm a water type, we can still be friends."

"C'mon! My bulb will be five feet tall by the time this meeting starts! So what are those 'things'? What do you think, Mr. Big Head Leader?"

"Hey! Oh well. I think they're some sort of alien trying to take over the world."

"With what? The smells they produce?"

"Good point Lapras. I don't think they're really that hostile. But I still only trust them as far as could throw them."

"Seeing as your Seismic Toss is a force to be reckoned with, that could be pretty far Charizard. I must say though. Those 'things' were almost as cute as a female Bulbasaur when her bulb is in full bloom."

"You think everything's cute Bulbasaur!"

"So what? I can say things are cute if they are!"

"You've been pretty quiet Lapras. Do you have an idea?"

"Well. They kind of look like Ash and Misty. And Ash and Misty are really fond of them. Maybe they're Misty's litter."

All of the Pokemon agreed that this was the most likely answer they'd heard so far.

"I guess you're right."

"That's why Ash wanted us to be super careful around them."

"I guess you're right."

"We should probably help Misty as much as we can."

"I guess you're right."

"We should help Ash as well."

"I guess you're right."

"Will you stop guessing Pikachu?"

"I guess I can."

"That's it! I'm leaving this meeting!"

Charizard stood up and stomped off.

"I should see if he's alright. He might be upset."

Lapras waddled off after Charizard.

"I'm not about to be here all alone with you, oh ketchup addicted leader!"

Bulbasaur ran off to play in the flowers. He is a grass Pokemon after all.

Pikachu sighed. "I guess I can go and try and fix the toaster. Maybe a good shock will get it working again." Bulbasaur popped out of the roses. "WILL YOU STOP GUESSING?!"

"Fine."

Just so everyone knows, I'm turning off the Pokemon translator now. Pikachu walked into the house. He made his way into the kitchen, where Ash was attempting to toast some bread.

"Hey Pikachu. Could you try and fix the toaster?"

"Pika."

Pikachu zapped the toaster and Ash tried to toast bread again.

"It works! Thanks buddy! Here's some ketchup."

Pikachu's eyes widened and he smiled. Ash put the bottle on the floor and Pikachu grabbed it in his mouth and dashed off. "Just don't puke ketchup on my bed again!"

Ash grabbed the toast as it flew into the air, put it on a plate, made some tuna salad, added ketchup and mustard, put the salad between the toast, therefore making a sandwich, and carried it upstairs to Misty.

I'm just going to step in and interrupt this story for a few seconds, seeing as I have a life-changing announcement to make. You see, after this chapter, this story will be over. Yeah. Bummer. Anyway. I'll then start working on the sequel, Flee For Your Life! It'll be about the Max that is Ash and Misty's son, Taylor, Courtney, and Abby. Just thought I'd let you know. Moving on to the story, upon reaching the twins new room, Ash saw Misty busy rocking Taylor to sleep. He waited until she put down Taylor, and then he brought her the sandwich. "Hey. You looked somewhat hungry, so I brought you your favorite sandwich."

"Thanks. You know, they're a lot of hard work now, but they're just so cute. I wonder what they'll be like when they're older."

"Probably just as wonderful as their mom."

"Awww… Ash. You can be so sweet sometimes. Emphasis on sometimes."

"Hey!"

"Is for horses."

"Where'd you come up with that?"

"I heard David annoying Max the other day."

"Oh. Amazing how much those two can quarrel yet still treat each other like best friends."

"Yeah."

"Also, I just realized another good thing about when the twins are older."

"What?"

"They won't smell as much. Max at least. Taylor will probably have lots of perfume."

"I didn't."

"Well, it wouldn't have been of much use anyway. We were always traveling. Plus you slept in a sleeping bag."

"So did you."

"True."

Just then, Max started crying.

"I guess I'd better rock him to sleep."

"I'll do it."

Ash walked over and started rocking Max's crib gently. Misty got up and went downstairs to consume her sandwich. Ash rocked Max for a couple of minutes, and then after he still didn't fall asleep, Ash took him out of his crib and started cradling him in his arms. When Misty came back a couple of minutes later, she discovered Ash in the rocking chair with Max still in his arms. Both were asleep. "That's the cutest thing I've ever seen."

Taylor woke up at this sudden noise and started crying. Not wanting to wake up Ash or Max, she picked up Taylor and sat down next to Ash. After a couple minutes of rocking, Taylor drifter off into dreamland, along with Misty. It had been a long day after all. Pikachu, who had finished his ketchup, walked by the room and stopped. He walked over and curled up at Ash's feet. Just before dozing off himself, Pikachu smiled. Maybe these new humans wouldn't be so bad after all. They were helping Ash and Misty finally get the rest they deserved. And with that, he nodded off as well. Anyone walking by would have been unable to not go 'Awwwwwwwwwwwww. That's so cute'. So let's all picture Ash and Misty sleeping next to each other in rocking chairs, each one of them holding a baby, with a Pikachu sleeping on the floor. Now say it with me. "Awwwwwwwwwwwww. That's so cute!"

THE END