Disclaimer: The concept of Ranma 1/2 and Naruto belongs to Rumiko Takahashi, and Masashi Kishimoto. This is a product of pure amusement values, with no profits made.
"Been a while." Jiraiya said suddenly, getting up from the waiting bench.
"Over a year, yes." Ranma nodded, dipping the brush in the ink, and watched the soft white bristles soak up the blackness.
"I heard some interesting gossip about Tsunade when I was in the Wind Country. She's doing good, making a big name for herself..."
"Good or bad?" A small smile played around the corners of his mouth.
"Both." Jiraiya's humor overwhelmed his words. "The Divine Hand, and the Legendary Sucker."
Ranma laughed, the brush temporarily forgotten. "Figures."
"Yeah."
"When are you leaving?" He tapped the brush against the edge of the ink slab, examining the bristles for excess residue.
"As soon as I get the briefing." Jiraiya replied, watching him curiously. "When did you start doing these?"
"Couple of months ago, Sarutobi-san taught me. He said I have a good style." Ranma nodded to the door on the other side of the room. "It's soothing, sort of." He applied the tip of the brush to the paper, and drew out the characters in a blur of flickers of his wrist.
"Sounds like..."
The door opened with a soft click, and shock blond hair poked out, followed by another, shorter, much shorter, and silver.
"Jiraiya-sensei, Umino-sensei." The boy, no, young man with the clearest blue eyes that Ranma had ever seen, grinned with his sunny smile as he pushed a familiar masked child out of the door. "Hokage-sama will see you now, Jiraiya-sensei."
Ranma watched white and blond disappear into the Hokage's office, and sighed softly, dipping the brush into the ink once more.
"Umino-sensei..."
"Umino-san." He corrected, sparing a look at the boy. "How have you been, Hatake? No more... challenges?"
"Umm..."
"Talk." He snapped sharply.
"ThisisthisoneboyMaitoGaihe'smyageandhekeepschallengingmeandcallingmehiseternalrivalandit'sreallyreallyreallynotmyfaultbecausehe'sweirdandneedshelp. Lots of help." Kakashi paused, sucking in a large gulp of air through his cloth mask, and added. "But aside from him, no."
Maito Gai... where have I heard that name before? Ranma paused, sparing Kakashi another look.
"I'll be taking over Yamano-san's classes until after her cousin's marriage." His wife commented at the dinner table. "I never thought that teaching could be so much work...But I am enjoying it very much."
"They aren't giving you trouble, are they?"
"No." She gave him an amused smile. "I even met an interesting boy in class today, Maito Gai. He's very... energetic. But a good boy."
"Uh-huh..." Ranma eyed the parchment in front of him, carefully measuring the remaining areas. "Some rivalries are good for you, as long as they don't get out of hand, Hatake."
Incredulity.
"But... but... but! You don't understand, Umino-sensei!" Another burst of gibberish followed, the silver-haired masked boy making furious gestures with his arms, and even stomping the floorboard several times for good measure.
Ranma simply nodded, listening to his ex-student with half an ear, and continued to write the manuscripts for the Hokage Monument.
Another gulp of much needed air.
"And... and... he keeps wearing that stupid green skintight rubber uniform, insisting it's 'all the rage' and makes him look like a 'sexy beast'!"
"Hatake." Ranma admonished. "Don't make fun of people."
Kakashi pouted. "But..."
"I don't mock you for wearing that mask day-in, day-out, right?" Ranma murmured, inspecting his work with an artist's eye. Hmm... a few more touches with the brush...
"Umino-sensei, I saw him trying to get fresh with your wife."
The brush went through the paper and through the table. (1)
-------
Maito Gai. Age 7. Failed the Academy Graduation Exam at the age of 6. Poor performance in Genjutsu, with only marginally better grade in Ninjutsu. Though he has shown an exceptional insight in Taijutsu, with the way he's blindly focusing on improving his marks in Genjutsu and Ninjutsu, he may be failing this year's exam as well. Ranma eyed the boy in front of him, and mentally reviewed his wife's words again.
"Maito Gai... come here." He beckoned with a finger.
"Yes Sensei!" The jumpsuit-wearing boy turned from the training post, and skipped closer.
Hmm... Ranma eyed the battered post. Strong... let's see about endurance...
Punch.
The small green figure sail back from the force of his strike, smashing, and breaking the wooden post to pieces.
"What did you do that for?!" Maito Gai screeched after he picked himself up from the rubble.
"Hmm..." Ranma nodded to himself in confirmation. "Good endurance, relatively strong... Just like Pig Boy was..."
"...What?!" The boy screeched again, sounding completely scandalized by the comment.
"Nothing." He said dismissively. Then blinked, and blinked again, then again for good measure. "Umm... I'm sorry? Really sorry? Please stop that... Maito?"
Ranma sweatdropped, seeing the twin trails of tears continue to gush down Gai's cheeks in great rivulets. Why does he remind me of someone...? Several someone, in fact...
The boy sniffled, and the waterfalls trickled down slightly.
"There, the..." Ranma was cut off.
"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" Gai jabbed a finger to his chest, the tears bursting full force, in twin impressive fountains that rose a good foot above his head before freefalling down around his feet. "How could you! Umino-Sensei! First you punch me into a training post!"
"Oh dear..." Ranma managed after hastily dodging the water works, though the boy seemed to be ignoring him completely.
"Then you sully my beautiful manly yet lithe physique..."
"Umm... Maito? Gai?"
"...by comparing me... me! The beautiful green beast of the Leaf!"
"Beautiful green beast?" Ranma mouthed, shaking his head. "Err... Gai?"
"...against a member of the porcine specie! Fate is truly cruel against the burning flames of youth!" The finger was suddenly retracted from its position, and clenched into a tight fist.
Ranma blinked some more, and mumbled hesitantly. "Gai? I think your eyes are on fire..."
"...But I shall not give up, even when I am faced with such darkness, no! No! NO! I will prevail by the light of my pure soul! And defeat my eternal rival Kakashi through the strong will of my heart!" Each word punctuated with his fist, pumping up and down in the air, in synch with the rise and fall of the gushing tears.
"Gai!" Ranma pinched the bridge of his nose. "I can train you to be on par with Hatake by your Genin exam, but only if you stop right now."
The tears, the burning flames, the flamboyant gestures were suddenly absent, and Ranma blinked again as he looked into the serious face of Maito Gai, standing perfectly still in front of him.
"You mean it, Umino-sensei?"
"... Sure. We can start tomorrow morning, be here by five o'clock, sharp." Ranma managed weakly. Why me? Why always me?
"Yessssssssss! Thank you sensei!" A blur of movement, and a weight latched itself to his waist, squeezing him hard enough that he felt his ribs creaking.
"Gai... I need to breath..." Ranma managed to squeak out.
"Of course, sensei!" Maito Gai gave him a big grin, and Ranma felt his eyes water at the bright flash of his newly assigned student's pearly whites. "Wait until I tell Kakashi about this, he'll be so jealous!"
"That's..." Ranma stared at the trail of dust in front of him, then to the black dot disappearing into the horizon. "... nice, I guess..."
Kids these days... He sighed, shaking his head, and immediately froze in dread as another thought came upon him. Oh Kami-sama, what have I done?! I just agreed to teach a hybrid of Pig Boy, Kuno and Tendo-san!
-------
"Thank you for bringing Ibiki, Morino-san." Ranma said to his former captain.
"It's your son's birthday, Umino." The man nodded, idly jabbing the small cake as they looked over the yard. "I thought Ibiki could do with some more friends his age."
"And I must thank you for inviting Gai along, I'm glad to see him making friends."
"Of course, Maito-san..." Ranma paused suddenly as the three children in question came into view. "Oh dear..."
"Let me at him! Just let me at him!" Ibiki snarled, his typical stoic expression replaced by one of absolute rage. Arms held wide with his hands hooked claw-like, and reaching forward in a choking motion.
His son had two handfuls of the back of Ibiki's coat, with his heels digging into the ground, whilst desperately pulling the older boy back from lunging himself toward Maito Gai.
"THE FLAMES OF YOUTH!" Gai exclaimed loudly, clapping his hands together before pointing at Ibiki in a dramatic fashion that involved several salutes, two thumbs up, and a bright flash of sparkling pearly whites, completely ignoring the inhuman growl that made its way out of Ibiki's throat. "Oh your enthusiasm brings me to tears, Ibiki! What a glorious day it is to play this tag game with you!"
"I'LL RIP YOU TO SHREDS!" Ibiki screamed, shrugging out of his coat before lunging forward, and missed Gai by a margin as the seven-years-old jumped away, disappearing in a trail of dust towards the dojo.
Spitting out of the dirt in his mouth from the failed tackle, Ibiki jumped up, and followed in a dust trail of his own.
"Ouch..." His son mumbled dizzily from the ground. Shaking his head to clear the stars, he discarded the coat, and quickly got up, grinning at the sweatdropping adults. "Don't worry! I have it all under control!"
"DIE!" A scream was heard in the direction of the dojo.
"On second thought..." His son gave him a smile before disappearing in a trail of dust. "I'll be right back!"
"..."
"..."
"..."
"I'll make tea." His wife smiled nervously, and disappeared into the house.
"I'll help."
"Me too."
"Tea sounds great."
-------
"Ibiki?" Ranma called out, the darkening sky playing shadows in his vision. "Ibiki? You can come out now, Gai just left with his father."
Harsh breathing answered him, and Ranma frowned, quickening his pace towards the back of the dojo. "Ibiki?"
Ibiki was standing at the clearing that separated the dojo from the surrounding forest, his entire body shaking, punctuated with short gasps of breath, his eyes large and wide, staring at...
Blue eyes widened. "You're back."
Serpentine gold shot him a look of pure amusement. "I am."
"Ibiki!" Ranma slapped the petrified boy on the shoulder. "Go back to the house. Ibiki!"
The boy shuddered at the touch, breaking out of his trance. Shooting Ranma a look of pure panic, he turned, and fled to the lighted house.
"My son turned six today. We had a small celebration for him." Ranma explained to the shinobi. "I had no idea that you'd be back from your mission in the Hidden Mist."
"I saw." Orochimaru murmured, golden eyes flickering to the direction of the Umino residence. He turned, and began to walk away.
"Orochimaru!" He called out to the shinobi.
The pale man paused, tilting his head slightly, golden eyes peeking from the curtain of raven, and bore into stormy gray blue in a mixture of anger and resentment. "Why bother, Umino? You don't need me anymore."
Ranma reared back as if he had been punched.
Orochimaru gave him a small smirk, and disappeared into the darkness of the forest.
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TIMELINE – Year Thirteen, late-May.
(1) Thanks to Serafita of the anifics forum, who pretty much wrote 2/3 of that scene, and gave me permission to use it for this story. If it weren't for him, well, I'm probably still stuck on how to bring Maito Gai in the story.
And you can all thank The Clueless on the anfiics forum, who made a pretty convincing argument on why I should introduce Gai into the story. Since originally, I did not plan on including him in. Though I must admit, writing him is fun.
Hmm... what else... Ah yes. I've been pondering on putting this story back in the Naruto section. On one hand, it's all about Ranma Ranma Ranma. But on the other, everything else is all Naruto. And I don't want to stick it in the Anime Crossovers... Choices, choices... Ah well, I'll make a decision on the next update.