Disclaimer: The concept of Ranma 1/2 and Naruto belongs to Rumiko Takahashi, and Masashi Kishimoto. This is a product of pure amusement values, with no profits made.
Poke. Poke.
"Mmm..." He muttered sleepily, and shifted away from the tickling discomfort.
Poke. Poke. Poke. Poke.
"Go'way." Curling tightly into himself, he stuck his head under the fuzzy darkness. Mmm... sleep.
Pokepokepokepokepokepokepoke.
He refused to budge. Sleep good.
A deep breath. "Ranma you IDIOT!"
"Gak!" He fumbled up from between twisted coverlet, and banged his head against the wall, eyes shut tight from the light, and the sudden sense of loss and bewilderment.
A pair of hands tugged on his arm as Akane gave him an amused smile. "Took you long enough, Ranma."
"Oh... morning Akane..." He smiled back tentatively.
"Morning." She gave him another smile. "Come on, Ranma, you don't want to be late for graduation, do you?"
"Of course not!" He replied enthusiastically, and jumped off the futon, fully dressed. "Thanks for waking me up! I had a strange dream last night..."
"Uh-huh..." She commented without looking back, pulling him out of the room.
Ranma found himself standing in the living room, the bright light of the morning sun shining from the slide doors that led to the dojo. He quickly took his place at the table, and simply basked in the warm comfort of the room.
"Good morning, Ranma." Nodoka smiled at him from the side, and Genma panda offered him a rough grunt before resuming to his breakfast.
Nabiki was sipping her first cup of coffee, and looked more awake by the second. Tendo Soun folded the newspaper and placed it aside as Kasumi sat the last bowl of soup in front of him with an ever-gentle smile. "See if you like this, Father, I've been testing a new recipe."
(Ah, Kasumi.) The panda sign came up, then flipped around. (Your cooking is as delicious as always.)
"Why thank you, Saotome-san." Kasumi smiled, holding a hand to her mouth. "Where is Happosai-sensei, by the way? He's going to miss breakfast."
"Don't worry about him, sis..." Nabiki rolled her eyes as the two patriarchs squeaked and made shushing gestures at Kasumi. "I think he's still holed up in his room after what you did to his precious collections, Saotome."
Ranma shrugged, completely unabashed. "The old pervert had it coming."
Nabiki smirked from over the rim of the coffee cup. "You don't hear me complaining, Saotome... He's going to want revenge, you know."
"You worried about me, Nabiki?" Ranma grinned.
"Just protecting my investment, Saotome." She retorted with a small smile. "Tokyo U is expensive, even with my scholarship."
"Figures." Ranma took a sip of the soup, blue eyes sliding towards the youngest Tendo sister. "I'll be fine... As long as it's not going to be another Soba Noodle incident, right Akane?"
She scowled at him, before the scowl suddenly turned into a devious smirk that quickly wiped the grin from his face. "If you say so, Ranma..."
Uh-oh...
"I cooked breakfast this morning, and since you're so confident in facing Happosai, why don't you have a bite?"
Dammit!"Umm... Akane... That's quite alr..." He wilted as she gave him 'The Look', and nodded meekly. "Yeah, sure. Just one bite."
She smiled happily, and he felt a warm, fuzzy feeling enveloping him at the smile... Which soon turned to a grimace as she placed a large plate in front of him.
"Akane?" He prodded the content of the plate, a large blob of reddish black that oozed thick goop of mucus from a dozen miniature spores on its surface. "I think it's alive..."
"Of course it's alive." Akane gave him a sweet smile. "Don't you..."
Click. A single chip appeared on her face, spider web cracks soon spreading quickly throughout her body.
"...like..."
Spreading, spreading, spreading into this picture of serenity...
"...it..."
...and shattered into a thousand pieces.
"...so...?"
The world tumbled into slow moving gray.
"Hooochaaaaaaaaaa!" His back flaring from the burning pain, Happosai appeared in front of him, cackling wildly.
"Shut up!" He roared, shaking his fist at the old man, completely at ease despite the rapidly changing background. "I'll just find the old hag!"
"Oh but Son-In-Law!" Happosai's face twisted, hair popping out from his head in giant spurts. Cologne cackled, waving her staff at him. "You must take Shampoo on a date first!"
"What?! No!" He retorted angrily. "Just fix this before I beat it outta ya, old hag!"
"I'll beat it out of you, Saotome!" Cologne cackled again, and exploded, literally. The remains of an arm morphing into Ryouga, a large chuck of thigh into Mousse, Kuno rose from the top portion of the scalp with his bokken raised, the three advancing towards him as more people formed from the bits and pieces of blood and gory that littered around him.
Konatsu. Ukyou. Shampoo. Akane. Kodachi. Hinako. Genma. Nodoka. Happosai. Cologne. With more familiar faces forming from behind them.
Closing in on him in a clamor of noise and movement and confusion and he could not move a single muscle.
A flash of darkness and light...
He stared down, down, down, the vast blue coming closer, closer, closer. No... he was the one who was closing the distance between them, the wind screaming in his ears as his body whizzed through the air.
He took a deep breath. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH..."
SPLASH.
It was suddenly cold, so chilling cold. Water rushed into her mouth and nose, she...
... couldn't breathe...
... as he stared at the child, who gave her another cheerful smile. "What's wrong, Saotome-san?
She was still smiling, even as the hunter-nin appeared behind her, pressing a kunai to her exposed throat. Still smiling, as the man slit her throat in a single, merciless stroke.
"Weak." He commented in boredom as the child crumpled to his feet, and he was suddenly in front of her, cruel fingers digging into her scalp, blue eyes watering from the pain, she looked up to his smirking face, crooning mockingly. "Protect? You can't even protect yourself."
He laughed, and brought his face closer to hers. "And the best part of this is, you've brought them their death, because you were just an ignorant, pathetic little girl."
Her ribs grinding painfully against each other, but she knew he was right, and it was all her fault, the guilt choking her, she...
... couldn't breathe...
Pale eyes watched him dispassionately as she drove another needle through his heart, and Ranma screamed from the pain.
"What's wrong, Umino-san?" She gave him a humorless smile, and stabbed him again with the needle. "Didn't you say you want to be cured?"
The green flames of the Shi Shi Hokoudan suddenly bathed him in its suffocating warmth, and he bit down on her neck, tearing flesh and bone that dissolved in his mouth, the taste of blood salty against his tongue, sweet and revolting that he wanted to gag, and he...
... couldn't breathe...
"Husband..." His wife smiled at him. "I said I will also wait for you..."
He smiled back tentatively. "Thank you."
"Don't thank me." Her eyes hardened. "It's time to go back to your grave. It's where you've chosen, isn't it?"
He looked down, following the line of her sight, and stared at his hand in absolute horror. The skin was bloated and peeling from the bone, the remaining bits of flesh a disgusting shade of green, purple, and black, with bits of fungus and mold growing all over, and crawling with maggots amidst the oozing thick globs of fluid.
Ranma looked up, the image of his wife shifting into a large mirror, and screamed at his decaying visage, even as his hollow chest collapsed into itself, the crumpling bones digging into his intestines, and he...
... couldn't breathe...
His fingers scrabbled frantically at the kunai lodged in his throat, the metal handle slick with his blood. Orochimaru nodded to him, regret lingering in his golden eyes. "I told you I'll kill you when we met again..."
He coughed, and managed to wretch the kunai out of his throat, but he...
... couldn't breathe...
Flames rose everywhere, engulfing him within their burning depth as the giant phoenix formed in front of him, its breath hot against his scorched skin, burning into his throat...
I... SEEK......and he couldn't breathe.
-------
Blue eyes snapped open into the harsh light, sightless. Followed by a long, hollow wheeze as he attempted to choke the air down to his lungs.
Screams, there were screams around him, and flurries of frantic activities.
"...spiratory system too much ! Somebody seda..."
"...ressure dropping, get me..."
"...in a freaking coma, a vegetable! For Hokage's sake..."
"...was stabilized! Was! Now stop..."
"...kra depletion! His body is shutting do..."
"...ousan! Tousan!"
"Get out of my way! Get. Out. Of. My. Way!" Slim fingers slipped into his hand, and grasped below his wrists. "It'll be alright, Husband, it'll be alright..."
Wife... I... He attempted a smile that made the tube in his mouth dig painfully against the back of his throat. Even if this is my grave...
Doe brown eyes appeared in his field of vision, a gentle touch against his forehead. "Husband, it'll be alright, I'm here with you."
He grasped the slender hand in his grip, ignoring the sharp flare of pain from his wrist. His lips parted with difficulty, and a half-gurgle escape his throat.
"Ran?" She leaned down towards him, her eyes dark with worry.
"I..." He maneuvered the plastic tube to the side of his mouth, and tried again. "I... ca...me back."
"Yes..." She smiled through her tears, and her fingers tightened around his. "You did."
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TIMELINE – Year Sixteen, early November.
Thanks again to the nifty peeps at the anifics forum for grammar and spelling. And ya, I'm still stuck on the 'writing' part. Drop me a line, Lizzie! Pretty please?
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