Hello again everyone. Here is the next chapter, and I have to say that I think it is my favorite! Thank you for all those who have reviewd. It really meant alot. Again all the thanks in the world to my beta who has caught things, six other pairs of eyes have not. To the DB crew, you all know who you are. Thanks for taking care of me this week and making sure I am okay everyday. I really am finishing this story for all of you thanks for beliving in me and here is to be coming the next Anita Stansfield (ha ha!). So on to the story.

Disclaimer- Guess what? Nothing has changed from before, I still own nothing. Okay well the plot is mine but that really is all.

Chapter 3: And I was unafraid the dream was so exciting but now I see it fade and I am here alone-

That had been one of the happiest days in her life and the first few years of marriage had been hard but wonderful. There were still death eaters to be caught and constant threats to the wizarding world but they had been happy through it all. She missed it all so much, she missed them, the way they used to laugh about everything and the way that she would catch Ron just staring at her while she was reading and all the little things he did each day to show his love for her. It all hurt so much; she knew that it was her fault, really. It was time to admit it. She was the one that had caused the separation; she was the one driving him away. She just felt that it was easier this way, less pain for him. "Do you really believe that Hermione?" she thought "Do you really think this has been less painful for him now that you have pulled away." She let the thought sit for a while. What did it matter really? They both had made mistakes; they were both still hurting, still grieving...

No she didn't want to think about that yet. There were still more happy memories she knew there were, Bill's wedding, Charlie's wedding, the day the bought the house, the day she started work as the advisor on Muggle affairs to the Minister of Magic, the day that he had started work in the Department of Magical Sports and Games. Their lives had so many joyful moments always surrounded by friends and family it was the life she had dreamed about when she had first married Ron, but parts of the dream were never to come true...

She was pacing back and forth in their living room; this was it she was going to tell him. She looked at the clock, two hours she had two hours until he got home. Two hours before he walked in the door and knew something was wrong. He always knew when there was something wrong. He knew she had been to see the healer today; he was the one that suggested that she go. She wasn't ready to hell him but no matter how hard she tried she could not keep this from him.

The thought of telling him made the bile start to rise in her throat again, no she couldn't. How in the world can you tell someone something this important? Just stand in front of them and say "How was your day? I have some news that is going to change both our lives and would you like peas with dinner tonight?" There was just no easy way to tell him. How had her mother told her father? She wished her mother were here to answer that question. In the years since her mother's death she had wished countless times to talk to her once more. There were so many questions and concerns that she had and really wanted her mum's advice on. Molly had been wonderful since that horrible day and tried to fill the role that was now vacant in her life but it just wasn't the same. She wanted her mom.

Elizabeth Granger had always been such a constant in her life. She had always made sure Hermione had been okay at school and was always aware of her daughters need to be a help to her friends during the war. She was sure her mother had missed her during the numerous summer vacations and holidays she had spent with the Weasley's and Harry, but she had never said anything. All she wanted was advice from her mother on how to handle this new situation. She was so concerned, so worried, this was all so new. Was she prepared to handle it? How she longed for her mom, wanted to feel her hands wrap around her and just hold her, stroke her hair as she did when she was a child and tell her that she was okay.

She went to the mantel and looked at the last picture she had of her parents. It had been of the three of them a few weeks the summer before her parents had died. Her parents had come for a visit to at Grimwald Place and they had gotten to spend a few days together. She cherished those days now she thought, those last days with them. She often regretted now that she never told them how much they meant to her during that time.

A tapping noise broke her from her memories and she looked out to see an owl at the window. Opening the window and let the unfamiliar bird in and untied the letter attached to his leg. The hand writing was so familiar, whose was it? Opening the envelope she found both a letter and another envelope inside. Looking at the handwriting on the second envelope and saw her name, written in her mothers familiar script. Was this some type of cruel joke? Why would anyone do this to her? Who would be so heartless to taunt her like this? She picked up the letter attached and began to read;

My dear Mrs. Weasley,

I know that this letter might come as a surprise to you, but I hope it is a welcome surprise none the less. As I am sure you remember a few weeks before their death your parents visited us at Grimwald Place. While they were there I was able to spend many delightful afternoons with them and found them to be the most charming, upright people, not unlike their daughter. We had many occasions to laugh as I told them of some of your exploits and antics during the school years. They were truly proud to call you their daughter.

The night before they left your mother handed me this letter. She told me she felt something might happen to her and your father, though she prayed it would not be so. If anything did happen she knew you would be taken care of by either the Weasley family or members of the order but she asked if I would hold this letter and send it to you when I felt that you need to hear from her. I took the letter from her that night and assured her I would wait for the right moment to give it to you. Because I knew that I would most likely not know when this letter would be of the greatest value to you, I placed a charm on the envelope that when there truly came a time that you needed your mother the envelope would glow and I would be able to send it off to you.

I have never read the letter nor do I have any reason to ask it contents. Just know that it was from her and she loved you with all your heart. If you ever need anything please feel free to call upon me. Though you have not been my student in several years now I still count you among one of the best I have ever taught and the years of working beside you in the Order has made you my friend. Please let me know if you need anything, though I am a poor substitute for your mother or even Molly, you are someone I care for deeply.

My kindest regards,

Minerva McGonagall.

She read the letter twice before she fully grasped its meaning. Her mother had thought something might happen. Her mother had left a letter to be given to her in case anything happened. She sat and stared at the letter fingering the envelope but not wanting to open it. She wasn't afraid of what she would find inside but she was still in shock. Professor McGonagall had known the precise moment to send it, she had been wishing for her mother so badly early in the day that the letter was heaven sent.

Finally garnering the courage to open the second envelope she pulled out the contents. Tears began to stream down her face as she ran her hands over her mother's handwriting. It was all so familiar; it reminded her of when her mother had sent letters during the Hogwarts days or when ever she had been staying with the Weasleys. Looking down she began to read,

My dearest, darlingness Hermione,

I don't know quite how to start a letter of this kind because if you are reading it, I have died. First off I just want to say how sorry I am love that I couldn't stay alive to be there with you. You know I would be if I could but life has had a different path for me. Please never think that this was your fault, your father and I could not have been more proud of you. We never wanted anything else for you from the moment we found out that you were a witch. You are destined for great things my daughter and I know you will accomplish them. Take the power you have been given and use it. With your heart I know that you can make the world such a better place.

Just some advice though- have fun in your life. You my dearest have the knack of taking life to seriously. Though there are times that you will need to be serious, there are also so many times requiring you to laugh at life. Go out and make mistakes, do not be afraid of failure- it is an essential part of living. We learn and grow from each mistake that we make. Please remember to have fun; it would hurt me so much to think that you were not. Your friends can help you with this; they are truly a wonderful group. Since we have been staying with you these last few days I have been able to spend sometime with each of them and I can see how they truly love you. They are each remarkable people and they think the world of you, stay close to them.

The Weasley's also care for you as their daughter; I have to admit that I have been very jealous of your relationship with Molly and Arthur over the past years. Please do not misunderstand me, they are wonderful people and I am so grateful they have watched over you the last few years. There were times however I felt that they meant more to you than we did. I understand now that this is not the case and I thank you for your bravery and courage in trying to help defeat a wicked man.

While we are on the subject of Weasley's there is one thing I do want to mention to you. Now you may not want to hear this but since I don't know when, if ever, you will read this letter but there is something I need to say. You need to know Ron worships and adores you. He may not have said anything yet but I can see it in his eyes and the way he acts when you are around. He brightens each time you enter a room, I know that he would do anything for you. I also know that you feel the same. Now don't deny it, I have seen you exhibit these same characteristics when he is around. Please if you haven't done so already- tell him.

Ron is a wonderful young man and I think the world of him. He needs to know the depth of your feelings because he is unsure of saying anything. I don't know maybe this is 'a man' thing; I had the same problem with your father. I know that you two would be happy together so please, for me, if you haven't just tell him how you feel.

Hermione, there is so much advice that I would give you if I could. I could fill pages and pages of paper telling you what I thought you needed to know. I wish I had the time to go back and document everything that I wanted you to know, about me, your father and yourself. Unfortunately this time has not been allotted to us and I can't sit and write like I would. It is times like this I wish I had kept a journal, just so you would have something to read and remember me by. If only we really lived in a world of wishing.

Since there is not time for me to tell you everything I just want you to remember these few things. I want you to have everything there is to have in this life. You can have any dream that you want just make sure you follow your heart and see where it will lead you. There is nothing you can't do my dear daughter just go forward and do not worry about failure. Make time in your life for love whether it be Ron (and I do truly hope it is) or someone else this will help you along your path in life. Lean on him and allow him to lean on you, share your burdens with one another and you will have so much love that you will be able to conquer anything. Finally never be afraid, never be afraid of anything you are better than fear, don't let it conquer you.

You have made your father and me so proud over the years as we have watched you grow from our baby to a beautiful woman. We love you so much and it pains me to even think about leaving you and who knows maybe I won't, maybe there will never be a reason for you to receive this letter and you will be there to take care of me in my old age and I will be able to see my grandchildren. For some reason though I feel the end is so near.

I know I have said this before but if you remember nothing else remember that your mother loves you and always will. I will always be with you, you are my daughter and my friend and what mother could truly ever leave her daughter?

I am finding now that it is too hard to say goodbye and every time I try I can't seem to find a real end. Since saying goodbye is so final, so I will not say it. I will give this to your Professor McGonagall, judging by your notes from school she knows you very well and should know the right time to give the letter to you.

There I go again trying to say goodbye and starting off on another tangent. So farewell my sweet daughter, follow your dreams and see where they will lead you.

Your mother and friend,

Elizabeth Jane Granger

PS- Don't hate me for this but I can't resist at least one more plead- tell Ron how you feel. I promise he will love you and take care of you more than anyone else that I know. - EJG

She laughed at the letter's post script, which was so unlike her mother, repeating and repeating herself. Mum must have really liked him she thought. Well, I can understand why, she said to her self. After reading and rereading her mother's letter she felt at peace with the situation. True her mother hadn't said anything that applied to her current situation, but it gave her the hug she so wanted earlier.

She smiled as she looked up at the clock again; she was amazed at how fast the time had gone by. Ron would be home in any minute and she no longer dreaded his homecoming. It was all going to be okay, she knew that now. Her mother had faith in her and always would. She ran upstairs and washed the tears off her face and touched up her make up. She was heading back downstairs when she heard Ron apparate into the home.

"Mione," he called "Mione where are you?"

"Right here" she said pulling him into a deep kiss

"What was that for, mind you I am not complaining, but bloody hell Hermione that was brilliant?"

"Language, Ronald" She smiled and walked into the kitchen to begin preparing dinner.

"Someone must have a good day." he remarked following her.

"Oh I really did Ron. I, well, I got a letter from my mum today."

Ron, who had been going through the rest of the post turned around at this comment "A letter, Mione how is that possible? Your mum has been gone for the past four years and there..."

"I know Ron," she said cutting him off "before she died remember how she and my father visited us at Headquarters?" he nodded so she continued "Well why she was there she felt that she was going to die soon. So she left a note in the care of Professor McGonagall to send to me at the time I would need my mother most. Read it Ron, she says quite a bit about you."

She sat next to him as he read both the letter from the Professor and then from her mother. She almost laughed at how red he turned when he read what his mother had to say about him. When he finished he just stared and looked at her and took her hand. "Wow, Mione, I mean wow. So McGonagall has really had this for the past four years?"

"Yeah, she must have. She was the one who sent it to me today."

"Why today though Mione? McGonagall said that she charmed the envelope so that she would know when it needed to be sent. Are you okay?"

"Yeah Ron, I am just fine. I did get some news today though that I really wished my mum had been here to hear."

"Mione, what's wrong? You are scarring me you know. What is it that is going on? Does it have something to do with the appointment you had a St. Mungo's today? I thought that was just a small bout with the flu are you okay what did they say?

"Ron, you know that you are cute when you are worried" she said placing a small kiss on his lips "I am fin. Actually nothing is wrong that seven more months won't cure."

"Mione you know that..." he stopped mid-sentence and she looked at him trying to stifle a giggle but not succeeding.

"Wait for it, wait for it," she mocked seeing realization dawn on his face "there it is- you've figured it out have you?"

He looked at her and then down at her abdomen, then back at her face again. "Hermione Weasley do you mean to tell me that you are, I can't even say it too loud."

"Yes Ron," she said placing her hand on his cheek "I am going to have a baby in seven months, we are going to be parents."

Ron let out a yelp and pulled her up kissing her soundly. She was grinning no longer able to hide her emotions. He dropped down to his knees and caressing her stomach said "Hello baby, I am your dad. I can't wait to meet you. I also can't wait for you to meet your mum she is the most wonderful witch in the world you are going to just love her."

She couldn't stop the tears now if she had wanted to, all the pain was coming so close to the forefront now. The memories were so clearer, much more painful. She flipped through the pictures in the album and watched her expanding stomach in each one, That had been such a happy time, they had shopped together for the baby, painted the nursery, chose names and got ready for the impending arrival. The Weasley's had been ecstatic and Molly sent daily owls to check on her progress and make sure she hadn't needed anything. The pregnancy had not been hard at all. She had so much help and support from her family and friends that she really hadn't had to worry about anything.

The baby arrived on a thunderous night, probably during one of the worst storms in England. They were over at Harry's, for dinner with both him and Ginny. She hadn't really wanted to go; she had felt so sick all day long and wasn't up to going out, even just for dinner with her best friends...

"Ron, do we have to go? I really don't want to; can't you just let Harry know that I really don't feel up to it tonight?I am sure he will understand."

"Sweetie, you know we haven't seen Harry and Gin in over a month. I really want to go tonight, if I promise that we won't stay to late is that okay."

"Fine Ron," she said marching upstairs to their bedroom to change.

Stupid hormones she thought, I just can't control any emotion right now. Tears falling down her cheeks she tried to change but could not find anything that she felt comfortable in. She just wanted to wear her sweats but knew that this wasn't possible. She hated feeling fat and ugly; she hated how Ron always told her she was beautiful. She knew it was stupid but it was how she felt. She quickly put on a maternity dress and pulled her hair back into a clip before joining Ron, downstairs. Since it was unsafe for her to travel by floo powder apparating was the only option. As soon as she joined him, he took her hand leaning forward placed a kiss on her forehead.

"You look beautiful sweetheart."

Once they had arrived at Harry's flat, she noted it wasn't as bad as she had expected. She was having a lot of fun sitting and talking to Ginny and Harry, it was just like the old days. She even ignored the pains in her lower back and abdomen dismissing them as indigestion. It was getting late though and she had decided they better make their way home. When she stood though intense pain raced through her and she had the sudden desire to sit down again. Seeing the look on her face, Ginny had rushed over to her,

"Hermione, are you okay? What's wrong? Is it the baby?" Ginny asked

"I don't think so Gin, I just didn't feel well for a second. I think I am okay now but I would like to complain to the chef about the cooking tonight." she said shooting Harry a playful glance

"Hey don't blame me or my cooking Mrs. Weasley. I don't see anyone else here sick." Harry retorted.

She grinned and tried to stand up again, the pain in her lower abdomen worsened when she did. Barely able to stand straight she realized that this was not indigestion, she was in labor. Looking up she saw that Ron had moved to her side and was supporting her while Ginny and Harry looked at her concerned.

"You okay love?" Ron questioned. She shook her head no and then Ron turned to Harry "Really Harry, if you have killed my wife you will have me to answer to-"

"Ron, I really think we need to get to St. Mungo's now." she saidanother pain shooting through her.

Ron looked at her as if she was speaking another language. Then finally understanding what she was referring to he dropped her arm and embraced- Harry?

"Harry did you hear we have to get to St. Mungo's, St. Mungo's! Do you know what that means? That means I am going to be a dad, Harry!" the two boys were jumping up and down like school girls entirely oblivious to herself and Ginny watching them

"Well mate, you are going to be a dad, you know what that makes me? An uncle, well not technically but hey I can still be the baby's uncle right? Who said that you had to be related someway? They didn't know what they were talking about. I Harry Potter am going to be an uncle!" and then the jumping continued.

When she looked over at Ginny she saw a look of disgust in her eyes, turning to her Ginny said, "Hermione, lets go. I am sure that these gits will realize sooner or later that you are the one that is having the baby and if we don't go now you might be having it on Harry's living room floor." then as the realization hit Ginny too she screamed "I am going to be an aunt. I am going to be an aunt," and then Ginny abandoning her too, she joined the boys in their celebration.

It was then that she busted out laughing. She couldn't help herself. Between Harry and Ron acting like ten year old school girls and Ginny's comments she just had to laugh. The obscurity of the situation made her wonder why she had even told them. In all honesty she would have been better off if she had just apparated to St. Mungo's by herself. Then she wouldn't have had to worry about the three over there.

Her laughing must have broke them out of whatever state of frenzy that had been in because the shouts and jumping had stopped now. The three of them looked at her with a concerned expression.

"Is she alright?" Ginny asked

"I always told you she was mental Ron, didn't I?" Harry said

"Hey mate you can't blame her it is the hormones and all that other woman stuff you know."

Ron replied

These comments just made her laugh all the more,

"Mental, Ron, I am telling you. She has finally lost it. Well I have to hand it to her. After twelve years of knowing you and three being married to you she lasted longer than any of us thought that she would." Harry said.

"I am not mental Harry," she was able to say through her laughter "If you three had only been able to see yourselves. Jumping up and down shouting." The memory again made her laugh but the laughter quickly gave way to the pain again.

"Ron," she said breathless after the pain had subsided "I really think that we need to get to St. Mungo's now. I know Harry is excited to be an uncle, but I don't think he wants said niece or nephew born in his flat."

"Right away love. Gin, can you let mum know that we have gone? Thanks." he said not waiting for a response. We will see you there?" both Ginny and Harry nodded and she and Ron apparated to St. Mungo's.

She laughed at the memory, times had been so easy then, the four of them really hadn't a care in the world. That had changed so much in the past year, it was all different now. The joy that once had been a constant in her life was gone. There was part of her that didn't even want it there, she felt guilty when she was happy. Deep down she knew it was all silly, that she needed to move on, that it wasn't wrong for her to feel joy but the loss still hurt so much.

She turned the page again and saw a picture of their son, Richard Arthur Weasley. He was a joy in their lives. She had loved getting up every morning and sneaking into his bedroom to watch him sleep. He had been such a good baby, so full of energy so happy all the time. It hadn't been fair, she had tried so hard to be the best mother to him and Ron, he had loved that baby so much, that he would have gone to the ends of the earth and back for him.

She didn't want to see anymore, she didn't want to remember any more. It was to hard now, it was all too hard. She closed the photo album and threw it across the room. Falling to her knees sobbing, she knew this was going to be too hard. Why had she even started this trip down memory lane in the first place? She wasn't ready to deal with it, she wasn't ready to admit that she had made the biggest mistake in her life and it had caused her family so much pain and heartache. She wasn't ready to face it, but it did make her realize that she was, for the first time in a long time, truly alone.