SPOILERS: None.
A/N: I am so glad you are enjoying this as much as I am. So, I said the last chapter was long and actually it really wasn't. I meant to say that about this chapter and got them confused. ;) Sorry! This one is long(er)and took me awhile to write; I kept changing my mind on the direction this was taking. I hope you like the end result. Thanks again for the reviews, they keep me going!
"Sara?" Grissom said gently. He watched her eyes flutter open and she leaned forward. She rested her head in her hands while balancing her elbows on her knees.
"I can't imagine how difficult it is for you to tell me all this. I'm really… proud of you."
"There's more." Sara leaned back against the bench and shivered.
"I'm listening." Grissom reached for Sara's hand. She stared at their intertwined fingers before looking up and locking eyes with Grissom. She seemed to be agonizing over how to continue, but Grissom's gesture relaxed her and she let the rest of the story flow out.
"My brother didn't get here the same day I did. He arrived last Sunday. He told me that Dad asked him to go for a walk. They followed the trail out to the cove. They had an argument and apparently Dad tried to walk away, but Dylan…he pushed him and he fell. I know it wasn't intentional; I believe Dylan never meant to hurt him. He went back to the house and told my mother what happened. My mother convinced him to just leave Dad there on the rocks. After a stranger found his body, my mother told the police my father had been walking alone and must have slipped and they believed her. It rained heavily that night and so there wouldn't have been much evidence to prove otherwise. Apparently, no witnesses either. So when I got here, she told me the same thing. Dylan didn't want me to know the truth because he knew what an awful position it would put me in. My mother thinks that after the funeral tomorrow we can just go back to our lives and continue pretending it was a simple accident. She was right about one thing, if Dylan goes to prison it won't bring dad back and it will ruin Dylan's life. I tried to make myself believe I'm glad my dad is dead, but that's not true. Despite what he did to this family, he was still my dad. Mostly though I'm just so sad and scared for Dylan. I don't know what to do Grissom, it's...unbearable."
Sara lost the battle with the tears that had been pooling in her eyes. She lowered her head as Grissom put his arm around her and drew her closer. She willingly buried her head on his shoulder and let his warmth envelope her.
Several minutes passed before he finally spoke.
"Sara, you know I'm not here as a CSI or your supervisor. I'm here for you as a concerned friend." Maybe soon more than a friend, when the time is right. "I can't tell you what you should do and it isn't my place to tell your brother to turn himself in." Grissom paused then as Sara lifted her head and leaned back. Grissom didn't move his arm. "What I can tell you is what I would do if I was in your situation."
Sara nodded slowly then turned her attention out to the ocean while waiting for Grissom to carry on.
"I've dealt with a lot of people who have been directly or indirectly responsible for the death of another person. Many of them feel no guilt or remorse for what they've done. Others may feel guilty and remorseful but only because they don't want to have to pay for their crime, they have no real empathy for their victim. Then there are those who are put in an impossible situation. Their actions involuntarily lead to the death of another and they immediately feel guilty and remorseful and they empathize with the one they've killed, no matter what that person may have done to them. These ones simply cannot live with the fact that they contributed to the death of another human being. Whether they confess the same day or 20 years later. It always catches up with them and they usually regret not doing the right thing sooner."
Grissom stopped speaking and gently turned Sara's head towards him with his free hand. He needed to look in her eyes to make sure she clearly understood what he was trying to say.
"It's not your choice to make Sara. This isn't your fault or your responsibility. I know you feel you owe your brother because he took care of you and protected you from your father. But maybe all you owe him right now is your trust. If you truly believe that it was an accident and that if not for your mother's influence your brother would have told the truth, then you just need to give him time. I'm not condoning what he did, you know that, but if it were my brother and I knew him the way you seem to know Dylan, I would give him chance to make things right. Give him time to be the honest person you know him to be."
Sara took a deep breath and wiped her eyes. She wanted to speak but was so drained she wasn't sure she could form a coherent sentence. She was amazed that he could read the situation so clearly. Within hours of his arrival he had managed to take days of anxiety off her shoulders. But then again, that was why she called him.
"Gris, you're right. I trust him, I always have. I know he'll do the right thing." Sara offered Grissom an unconvincing smile but at least she had stopped crying. " Will you stay for the funeral tomorrow?"
"Of course. I'm here for you Sara and I'm not leaving until you want me to."
"What if I never want you to go?" Sara could scarcely believe the question had come from her mouth. The last she wanted to do now was scare him away by hinting at the ever-present tension of what to do about 'this'. But Grissom didn't look scared; he looked pleased.
"Then I'll stay forever."
This time Sara's smile was not only convincing it was electric.
XXXXXXXXXXX
Grissom and Sara took their time as they walked back to the Silent Cove B&B. Grissom seemed in no rush to let go of Sara's hand and she didn't mind. Sara had suggested going into town for coffee without admitting that she just wasn't ready to introduce Grissom to her mother. Grissom sensed her apprehension and suspected she was stalling, but he was grateful to have more time alone with her. As they neared the end of the trail, the dark clouds that had been threatening to open up finally gave way to a torrential downpour. Grissom clumsily covered their heads with his jacket and they quickly took refuge in Sara's rental car.
They drove into town and had coffee in a small café while watching tourists dart in out of doorways on Main Street, trying to avoid getting wet. They didn't feel the need to talk and sat quietly enjoying each other's company, although distracted by their own thoughts. Grissom was still worried about Sara and berated himself for being so hard on her in the past. He hated that he had let his own fears and insecurities push her away when she made it so clear all she wanted was to be close to him. He hoped it wasn't too late to make amends. So far his gestures and comments had been well received and he hoped it would continue. The true test would be what happened when they were back in Vegas. I won't hurt you again Sara; please give me another chance.
Sara was lost in own reverie, mourning her losses, past and present. She wasn't expecting to feel this way. She thought the anger would stay forever. I guess mom was right after all, at least about grieving. She felt Grissom staring at her and she turned her attention away from the window. She held his gaze and wondered what he was thinking.
"I'll buy you another coffee if you tell me what you're thinking?" Sara offered.
Grissom looked at his empty cup, a half-smile forming on his lips. "Nice try, but I've had enough."
Sara frowned and considered pressing him about it, but then decided that if it were important, he would tell her when he was ready.
XXXXXXXXXXX
Grissom followed Sara up the steps to her mother's house. She had been pleased to see her brother's car parked in the driveway. It would make conversation easier with her mother. They entered the house and peeled off their wet outerwear. Sara led the way down the hall and into the living room. Dylan was sitting on the couch with his laptop. His finger stopped tapping on the keys as Sara and Grissom crossed the threshold.
"Hey, you're back." Dylan put his laptop on the coffee table and stood to greet the newcomer.
"Yeah, we went into town. Um, Dylan this is Gil Grissom. Grissom, my big brother, Dylan Sidle."
"It's nice to finally meet you Dr. Grissom, Sara has told me a lot about you." Dylan started while shaking Grissom's hand.
Grissom raised a curious eyebrow at Sara and then looked back at Dylan.
Dylan chuckled softly, "Don't worry, it was all good things."
"Please, call me Gil." Grissom replied, intrigued that Sara had talked about him with her brother.
"Really, from what I hear Sara doesn't even call you that."
As Grissom smirked, Sara blushed a bright shade of red and quickly changed the subject.
"So Dylan, where's mom?"
"Right here." Diana stood in the doorway directly behind Sara.
"Mom, hi. This is – "
"Mr. Grissom, welcome to The Silent Cove."
"Thank you. You have a lovely home."
Diana nodded and forced a smile. "We like it. Well, I hope everyone's hungry, dinner's ready."
XXXXXXXXXXXXX
"So, Gil, have you been to this part of California before?" Dylan decided to break the ice at the Sidle family dining table.
"Yes, I've consulted in San Francisco before but this is my first time in Tamales Bay."
"Hmm…a shame it couldn't have been better circumstances. This really is a nice town to visit."
Grissom nodded and took another bite ofEggplant Parmesan.
"This is good mom." Sara attempted to force her mother to speak.
"Thank you." Diana replied curtly while reaching for her wine.
Sara knew her mother was not going to make this easy. She caught Grissom's eye and he gave her a subtle smile. Sara knew it was his way of telling her it was o.k. that her mother wasn't on her best behavior. Dylan saw the entire exchange and suppressed a smile himself. Sara had always confided in him about her feelings for Grissom and he was glad to have the opportunity to see she was not entirely wasting her time. It was obvious to him that the eccentric entomologist shared her feelings even if he had yet to declare them.
"How long will you be staying?" Diana finally asked.
Grissom looked up and realized Sara's mother was looking at him. "Oh, um – Sara asked if I would attend the funeral tomorrow. So if it'salright with you and Dylan, I'll stay for that and maybe head back to Vegas in the evening or Sunday morning. It's really up to Sara."
Diana raised an eyebrow and looked at her daughter. "I see."
Sara avoided her stare and concentrated on her mashed potatoes like they held the secrets to the universe. She knew her mother's attitude went beyond the fear she had of losing her son to prison. She didn't approve of Sara's career choice and the last thing she wanted was her daughter hooking up with another CSI who happened to be her supervisor and 15 years her senior.
Dylan decided it was a good time to intervene. " Gil, of course it's fine if you attend the funeral. We appreciate you taking the time to be here for Sara."
Grissom offered Dylan a small smile of thanks and stole a glance at Sara who was looking a little pink.
"Well, if you will all excuse me, tomorrow is going to be difficult and I'm very tired so I think I'll turn in early." Diana left her nearly full plate on the table and retired to her room.
"Gris, I'm sorry about her." Sara sighed while aimlessly moving her food around. She had no appetite.
"Don't be Sara; I expected it to be a little awkward, remember?" Grissom reassured her.
"Things will be better after tomorrow. We all just need some closure." Dylan interjected quietly.
Sara looked at her brother and then at Grissom. His eyes held a question she did not have an answer to.'Closure' was something Sara was not sure she was prepared for.
TBC