Search for a Soul
Chapter 5
"Worthless"
By MEGAMANX411

Mega Man X walked past Alia, leaving her in a saddened state. She gave him a sympathetic look...that was all she could really do. After all, he was covered in filth, and it was painfully obvious how miserable he was. It was almost as if his soul was being ripped from his body and being torn asunder by the vicious flames of hell. X's eyes just screamed the pain and torment he felt inside of him, yet it had no outlet. Alia looked down to the ground, and felt a bit sad herself. She was generally optimistic, although she was rather serious most of the time. She was one to get to business whenever need be, and she usually didn't have to dwell on matters like X did. However, something was different about X. Even if it was the slightest wrongdoing, it stuck with him for what seemed to be forever, and it constantly gnawed at his mind, invoking feelings of worthlessness.

She didn't think he deserved such torment at all. Who could? X had fought bravely for both reploids and humans, and was quite possibly the best Maverick Hunter they had, along with Zero. She couldn't quite comprehend it. He was just really too compassionate for a Maverick Hunter, it seemed. It wasn't that X was weak or anything, because he could fight very well. It's just that his personality didn't really seem to be one of a fighter, at least not now. Alia wasn't around when X first joined Maverick Hunter HQ, so she wasn't entirely sure what he was like back then. Based on what she had heard though, he was a lot more willing to fight for a cause back then. She had to wonder what exactly happened to make X so sad? As Alia pondered the matter, X finally reached Signas.

"Hello Signas," X began. "The mission was successful."

X's voice was strained and hoarse, but he retained his composure. Signas easily saw that something was troubling X, but decided against bringing it up. He could read X pretty well, and he understood that he didn't want to discuss the matter any further. The best thing for X at the moment was just some peace and quiet.

"Understood," Signas replied. "X, take a rest. You need it," he added.

With a quick salute, X was dismissed from Signas' presence. After that, however, his eyes drifted away, and he lowered his head slightly.

Is it really that obvious? he thought.

X walked away slowly, trying to figure out what to do with the rest of his time. Nothing seemed to really interest him. He didn't necessarily need to eat, sleep, or drink. He didn't require any matenaince at the moment either. There wasn't exactly anything that he felt like doing for fun either. X finally decided to kick back with a nice drink, to see if he could just relax. He walked over to the nearest vending machine. As he made his entry, Alia tapped him on the shoulder. X

"What is it Alia?" X asked, bending over to grab his drink.

X didn't look at Alia as she asked him that question. He did turn to face her, but it still didn't seem like he was actually looking at her. Alia could still see something in his eyes regardless. Alia finally decided to press the matter and get to the bottom of things.

"X, tell me. What's wrong?" Alia asked.

X played dumb. He didn't want things to get out of control, so he just thought he'd shrug it off. To him, this was something he felt that he needed to deal with alone.

"I'm fine, nothing's wrong," he replied.

Alia's eyes trailed off, conveying a general message of sadness and sympathy. It wasn't really that she was hurt by X's words, it was that she just wanted to try and help him. It really felt like she was trying to talk to a brick wall. X simply wouldn't let anyone in his feelings, so to speak.

"If you say so.." she muttered, walking away.

X thought that perhaps he offender her, so he tried to speak out to her. But once again, words failed to come. By the time he issued his apology, she was already gone.

"I-I'm sorry..." he whispered, stretching out his hand futilely once again.

X eyed the drink in his hand, and set it back down. He wasn't feeling very thirsty anymore, and just wanted to sleep. X walked down to the service bed, and sat down. He sighed lightly as he stretched out on it. As he closed his eyes, he saw an image of the Maverick he met earlier today. He remembered hearing his voice.

"See you in hell!"

X shuddered at the sound of his voice, although in his dream, the reploids' quivering voice seemed to have a demonic edge to it that horrified him even further. He witnessed the reploid's head being completely obliterated again and again in his mind, seeing every last detail of the effects of the explosive. X, in his dream, kept trying to save the reploid, but failed every time. Zero, on the other hand, merely stood with his back facing them both, arms crossed. Did he simply not care?

X began tossing on the service bed, and was seemingly unable to hurl himself out of his nightmare. After he had witnessed the Maverick killing himself over and over again, he was then brought to the image of the preacher. X kept hearing his offensive statements run through his mind, gnawing away any dignity he had, criticizing every worthwhile facet of his existence. He then imagined himself taking out his aggression on the man, which brought him mixed feelings. He felt relieved. He felt that it was kind of good to get rid of that stress, that annoyance.

However, the fact that he had such a feeling also brought him a sense of apprehension and fright. He couldn't stand to see what he thought he could do, or what he could become. X was disgusted at his dreams, and at his inability to fix the problems in his life. Dr. Light had supposedly given him unlimited potential. If that was the case, why did he feel so hindered all the time? X had wondered if it was possible that Dr. Light was incorrect, if X was a worthless, base creation. Just then, X felt a hand grab ahold of his shoulder.

"X!" the voice shouted. "Wake up!"

X bolted upwards, and rubbed his eyes. It was Zero. The crimson Maverick Hunter had a stern look on his face. It seemed as though there was something serious going on.

"Zero...what's the matter?" X asked.

Zero narrowed his eyes. He really meant business.

"There's a Maverick in HQ. He's got hostages," he replied.

X's eyes widened in disbelief. How did someone sneak in so easily? Didn't Maverick Hunter HQ have top notch security systems? What was the point if they couldn't stop intruders? X silently cursed, and got to his feet.

"Let's get moving," Zero commanded, gesturing for X to follow afterward.

X nodded, and followed Zero's lead. The red reploid stayed a bit ahead of X as they both ran down the hall. As they drew closer to their destination, Zero gave a look back at X.

"X, if we can find Alia, she may be able to give us some information about this enemy," he offered.

X nodded in confrimation. Alia! That was a good iea. She would undoutedly be able to provide excellent support.

"Yes, that's a good idea."

X and Zero went to the navigation center of Maverick Hunter HQ, where Alia would normally be found in times of distress. However, she wasn't there. It was strange. The room seemed unnaturally empty without her there. Normally, they could hear her going off about her mission reports or training tips.

"What?" Zero shouted, surveying the area. "Where is she?"

X looked around the room. There was no sign of her anywhere. X suddenly got a horrible feeling in the pit of his stomach.

"She's...gone.." he muttered.

"Is it possible she was captured?" Zero asked.

X gritted his teeth. He couldn't accept that. Alia captured? She was in Maverick Hunter HQ! How could she have possibly been kidnapped from right under their noses? It was ridiculous. A deep feeling of guilt surged through him. Surely, if he were awake at the time, he could've prevented her being kidnapped. It was his fault. If only he had paid better attention.

"No!" he shouted.

Zero shot a look back at X. Zero knew that X was obviously getting really heated over this. Being more collected, Zero tried to devise an alternative.

"Look, we don't know if she's captured. Let's find Signas, maybe he knows where she is," he replied.

X and Zero then ran off to find Signas, and found him rather quickly. It wasn't hard, he was nearby anyway. In times of crisis, Maverick Hunters were supposed to stay together. It was just too bad that things went wrong on such a casual day. The crime rates were extremely low at the time, so there wasn't much reason to keep surveillance on high alert. Signas supposed that it was only natural for things to go wrong...when had they been given a day off before?

"Signas!" Zero shouted.

Signas seemed to take a breath of relief when he saw the two famous hunters. His expression was still firm, and he showed barely any emotion. Signas was arguably the most tactically brilliant reploid at Maverick Hunter HQ, and he really kept a calm edge at all times. He truly was a born leader.

"X, Zero, good to see you here. We have an intruder in Maverick Hunter HQ," he replied.

"That much we know," Zero replied. "What are the details?" he added.

"They captured Alia, as well as a few humans."