Search for a Soul
Chapter 7
"Kindness"
By MEGAMANX411
After Signas and Alia fixed the security cameras, Alia walked back into the medical district to find X still there. A couple tears hit the ground, and X smacked the ground as hard he could with his fist. She couldn't believe that he was still there. He had been really hurt by the events that transpired there, it seemed. Alia just didn't know how to help him. She felt horrible that he was so depressed, she wanted to do something to try and help him.
"I couldn't...I failed again.."X muttered.
X then felt a hand on his shoulder. He didn't turn immediately. He was too surprised to do so. He knew it wasn't Zero. It was someone else.
"It's ok..." said the voice.
X looked up to see the face of Alia. He saw her warm smile, and he almost felt a little better because of it. He quickly wiped his face, and stood up. Truthfully, X was very glad to see that Alia was still ok. He was worried immensely about her during the hostage situation.
"I'm glad to see you're not hurt..." X replied.
"It was thanks to you and Zero," Alia responded, still smiling.
X looked down to the ground. Zero was the one to destroy the Maverick. He, on the other hand, only preached his ideal. X felt that he truly did nothing. The Maverick still died. Life was still lost. One way or the other, he felt defeated. Was a peaceful resolution really impossible?
"That's not true. I didn't do anything...I..." he whispered.
Alia knew she would need a good answer to get X to feel any better. She did her best to search for just the right words, and she responded confidently.
"X, you did the best that you could, and standing by your morals is a noble thing," she replied.
X gave her a strange look. He was simply amazed that someone finally called him noble. Most humans tended to dislike him for being a reploid, and some reploids disliked him because he was a Maverick Hunter. To him, it was really odd to get a compliment like that.
"Y-you...think so?" he asked.
Slowly but surely, a humble smile crept on X's face. It wasn't anything grand, but it was an awkward smile. It definitely showed that there was progress. Alia at least made the first step to making X feel better.
"Thank you..."X added.
That small gesture of kindness seemed to lift an incredible burden that was on his shoulders. But no matter how much he tried, he couldn't get rid of the feeling of sadness that came from loss of life. The smile quickly faded away as negativity flowed back in. Immediately, X's self-doubt drowned out the praise.
"That's kind of you to say..but I'm not deserving of such praise," X added.
He started walking away, but Alia tapped him on the shoulder again. He was surprised that she chose to keep hanging around him, despite how depressed he was acting. Not that he was getting angry or anything, however. He enjoyed her company, he just didn't feel that he deserved to be called noble. After all, in his own perspective, he was a murderer. But apparently, Alia didn't believe that.
"I don't agree with you," she replied.
X looked at her curiously. He never expected anyone to say anything else after his last comment, especially along the lines of disagreement. Alia looked so serious, but she still seemed happy. Not much seemed to get her down. X wondered how she managed to do it.
"What do you mean?" he asked.
"I think you do deserve praise. If it wasn't for you, Zero would be dead, Sigma would've taken over the world, and humanity would've been either wiped out or enslaved. You just don't realize it," she explained.
X sighed. This conflict was tearing him up inside and was making him feel quite ill. He had heard about his battles against Sigma countless times before, and truthfully, he was getting a little tired of hearing about them. He felt like he knew enough...after all, he was there. However, Alia instantly got an idea of something that might help X feel better. She had noticed that during her time at Maverick Hunter HQ, X had never once taken a day off. She saw him relax a little at work, but barely. He truly wasa very hardworking person, but she knew all that stress had to get to him sooner or later. She thought maybe she could help him unwind.
"You know, X, I think you should take some time off. Clear your head," Alia offered. "Would you like to come with me? I planned on going out anyway," she added.
X gave her a strange look. He never really did anything outside of his job. He was completely oblivious as to what Alia was referring to.
"What..are you saying?" he asked.
Alia giggled. She thought X was kind of like a child still. He was really easy to embarass, and he was really shy.
"I'm asking you if you're busy. Having some fun would do you good," she replied.
X didn't want to offend Alia, but he wasn't really feeling like going anywhere. He didn't feel like he really earned any sort of vacation. Still, he didn't want to hurt Alia's feelings. She did offer to help, which was nice. He figured the least he could do was accept her proposal.
"I...suppose so," X replied.
"Well then, let's go. Come on, follow me," Alia answered with a smile.
X humbly agreed without saying a word. Alia was apparently ready to head out already, so she just motioned for X to walk with her. When they stepped outside, X was amazed to see it was already dark. The lights lining the streets were already up as well. It was a bit chilly, but for a reploid, it didn't matter as much. X only wondered where they were going.
"It's already gotten late," he observed.
"Well, we did spend a lot of time fixing the security system. Nothing should go wrong now,"Alia replied proudly.
X looked down to the ground. He knew that the security systems were helpful, but things always went wrong. For him, at least. It seemed as though no matter how many times he saved anyone, things still went bad again. It was a vicious cycle he couldn't stop.
"But something bad will happen again. Something bad always happens.." he muttered.
X then realized that he probably offended Alia with his statement, so he immediately apologized.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean that," he added.
Alia sighed. She had thought she made progress by making him smile her, but it seemed as though X had some serious issues. Low self-esteem was definitely one of them, which she knew would take awhile to fix.
"I know X. That's your problem, you need confidence," she replied in a matter-of-factly manner.
Almost by instinct, X was ready to apologize again. He even bowed as he did so.
"I'm sorry.." X replied.
He then realized what he just did, so he placed a hand over his mouth. He couldn't believe that he reflexively apologized just after being told to be more confident. He felt like such an idiot. Alia,however, only giggled in response. She thought it was kind of funny that he was so polite. Unlike many other of the staff members at Maverick Hunter HQ, or anyone in general really, X was incredibly humble and polite. Alia then got the idea that maybe relaxing with a drink might be the best idea to get X to talk a little.
"Why don't we get something to drink?" she asked, pointing to a bar nearby.
X shrugged. He had no disagreements with her decision, and he didn't really have a preference one way or the other.
"That would be fine with me," he replied.
The bar appeared to be mostly for reploids, although they did make out a couple humans in there. It wasn't exceptionally packed, but it was a little on the crowded side still. The noise level was kind of high, due to all the conversation going on, but thankfully, there wasn't any fighting of any sort. It was a fairly nice place, but kind of lacked atmosphere. There were a couple smokers in there, butthey were on the other side of thebar. X and Alia made their way in, and took a seat ata tabletogether. As they sat down, Alia noticed that X looked a little uncomfortable. She decided to break the ice.
"This is a pretty nice place, I go here every once and awhile," Alia explained.
"I don't go out too much," X replied casually.
Alia could tell that fact all too well. She had noticed that X seemed to be lacking some social skills, and although he had an agreeable personality, he would benefit from having more friends. She thought that if she got him to have a good time, he might actually unwind a little himself.
"Well, let's try to have a good time then," Alia teased.
X tried to smile, but had difficulty doing so. He didn't really know what to say back, so he decided to see what he should order.He quickly scanned the menu, but was far too confused to place his order.
"I'm not really sure of what to get..." he muttered.
Alia knew she would have to take the initiave. So, she had another idea.
"I'll order something for you. It'll be a surprise then," Alia replied, getting up from the table to go to the bar.
X smirked, something he usually didn't do. He smiled and nodded in response, and decided to give it a shot. He waited at the table, and Alia returned soon after with their drinks. X reluctantly grabbed the odd drink, and inspected it. With a shrug,he took a sip.
"It's pretty tasty," he exclaimed.
Alia thought that this was the best opportunity to finally get X to talk a little about himself. If she knew a little more about him, she could help him feel better.
"It's my favorite thing here," Alia replied, smiling. "So, X, tell me. What's been troubling you?" she asked.
X set his drink down. Truthfully, he kind of expected Alia to ask him about his behavior. He didn't really prepare anything beforehand, but he had a pretty general answer in the back of his mind still.
"I just don't think what I'm doing is right...I thought I could stand it at first, but..." he whispered.
"But what you're doing is right," Alia interrupted. "You're fighting to save the innocent. What's wrong with that?" she asked.
X looked a bit agitated now. He knew that she had a point, but just wasn't the way it looked. Maverick Hunters protected humans by fighting Mavericks. The idea was simple enough. But on each mission, X felt more sad about his results than happy.
"But no matter what I do, someone dies..." he replied.
Alia knew right away what X was talking about. She had heard a lot about his previous missions, and she understood that it was hard to accept the loss of life. X seemed to take it a lot harder than others as well. Every loss got to him.
"Sometimes you cannot stop someone from dying, but the thing you need to remember is to not repeat the mistakes that lead to their demise," she explained.
X admitted that sounded likea good answer. But he just couldn't accept loss of life. After all, those people were dead, and would never return. And it was his fault. X didn't really say anything else in response. He didn't feel like discussing the matter further, and wondered if he should just tell Alia that they should call it a night. However, before he could do anything, Alia decided to change up the conversation.
"So...X, we've worked together for awhile now, but I haven't really talked to you much. Why don't you tell me a little about yourself?" Alia asked.
X blushed, and a forced smile appeared on his face. He rubbed the back of his head, and looked somewhat embarassed. The blush was really minor, but Alia still managed to see it a little. X saw the previous discussion coming, but he really didn't expect to get into his personal life. He didn't know what to say at all, and he was struggling to get an answer.
"Well...there's...not a lot to say, I suppose," he replied, chuckling a bit.
"Oh come on, anything?" Alia teased, smiling at him.
X shrugged. He admitted defeat, and finally decided to spill his guts.
"Well...I do like to read. I do it in my spare time," he replied.
There! Alia had hit a topic that X seemed interested in. She liked to read herself, so it was something they had in common. So it seemed as though X wasn't all work after all!
"Oh really? What are your favorite books?" Alia asked.
X's eyes trailed off, as if he expected to find an answer through that method. He was trying to sort out his ideas, but appeared to have little luck.
"Well..I suppose I don't really have one particular favorite," he muttered.
"Have you thought about writing your own story?" Alia asked.
X's eyes widened. Now that certainly wasn't a question that he was prepared for. He had contemplated writing something himself before, but he had actually never really gotten around to it. He was simply a little embarassed to ever do so, because he felt that no one would ever like to read it.
"I have...but I don't think anyone would read it, heh..." he replied, smiling.
Alia smiled once again in return. It looked as though X was making a little progress. Taking him out did seem to be a good idea. She just had to give him a little push, and it seemed as though he was gonna be ok.
"It's nice to see you smiling again. You've been so gloomy recently. So, what were you thinking of writing? I'm interested," she replied.
X looked rather suprised by her last remark. No one had really expressed an interest in hearing what he had to say. Most of the time he was in mission situations, so he couldn't exactly carry on a civilized discussion.
"Well, I've kind of wanted to write a book about my ideals," he explained, looking a bit embarassed.
Alia was actually a bit surprised that X really wanted to write a story. She admitted to being interested in it, and she thought their discussion was moving in a positive way. She decided to continue, but she first opted to take another sip of her drink.
"Don't be embarassed! That sounds really interesting X! So, what else do you like? Music, movies?" Alia asked.
X shrugged his shoulders. He wasn't exactly "up to date" on the latest things for entertainment.
"I haven't watched too many movies, but for music...I suppose anything, depending on the emotion," he replied.
That's when yet another idea struck Alia. A movie! That was a brilliant idea. It was yet another good way to pass the time, and it was something fun to do. She just had to see if X would accept her proposal.
"Say X, would you like to see a movie with me?" Alia asked.
X was a little dumbfounded by that question. Yet another thing he didn't expect.
"Why?" X replied.
Now it Alia's turn to be confused. She had never heard anyone respond "why?" to a question like that. She reasoned that it was further proof that X needed some time off.
"Why not? It'd be kind of fun," Alia teased.
X smiled again. He felt a little embarassed about asking why, but he figured it couldn't hurt.
"Well...I didn't really have any plans..." he muttered.
"Let's go then. I bet there's a movie we'd both like. Come on!" Alia replied, getting up from her seat.
Alia motioned for X to once again follow her, and with the upmost obedience, he did so. It looked as though there was some hope for X yet! It finally seemed like X was beginning to have fun. So, with that, X and Alia left the bar and headed over to their local movie theater.
They were, however, unaware of someone watching them.