Standard disclaimer applies.

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The Sound of Jasmine

By: Luna

Part Ten: Bliss

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"Why do you stay here? Why do you continue to her hurt her?"

Even though I knew I really shouldn't let his words get to me, they kept repeating over and over in my head, like an unstoppable mantra. Why *did* I stay here? Why *did* I keep hurting her? The answer is simple. I am a selfish bastard. I greedily hold all of Kaoru's moments and mine together, greedily wanting to demand for more. I hate it when others are around her, because then we are not alone. We don't talk much, but I like to consider myself a man of actions rather than a man of words. Words were meaningless to me, after all.

He smirked as if he had won the battle, and perhaps he really had. "You will leave. You know you will. And you will steal away her happiness just like you did Tomoe. The only difference is she will still be alive to taste the bitter fruits of the heartache you will leave her with. You will never be able to make her happy. Why are even trying? You are only going to hurt her in the end."

I bowed my head, feeling the weight of his words and cursing how he had lodged that one tiny ball of guilt with a little bit of doubt in my heart, just like he had been aiming for. But I couldn't regret my decision to stay. She was the single light in my dreary darkness, and no matter how guilty I may be in the end for hurting her; I just couldn't regret any of the time that I spent with her.

So I replied with the best answer I could give. "When I leave, I may hurt her. In fact, I know I will. But if I can give her happiness, in any form I can, then I will give it to her. She knows that I will be leaving. She realized it a long time ago. We both accepted the consequences that sealed both our fates when she let me stay here. And I will not regret, even for a moment, the time that I spent with her."

I repeated the words that I spoke to him over and over again, glad that I answered with the truth. If I had lied then, I knew that tiny ball of doubt and guilt that Enishi made would only grow and force me to leave faster than I wanted to.

"Yes, you won't, but will she?"

Would she? Would she—*does* she regret the time we spent together, even as fleeting as the moments were? I didn't know, and I didn't want to dwell on it. Enishi didn't love her; I knew that for a fact. But I know also that he holds a great deal of affection. And I damned myself for taking that away from him.

He knew he had to leave. We both wouldn't and couldn't accept each other in the presence of Kaoru; we hated each other too much to allow it or rather, he hated *me* too much to allow it—the fight had only determined who would be able to stay the longest.

We acted like children, nearly playing an all out tug-o-war over the beautiful object of our affection, but I know that it could not have been any other way. Enishi was not the kind of man to sit down and talk over differences—especially if that talk was over Kaoru. Like me, he was selfish. And like me, he wanted only Kaoru.

"Kenshin? Lunch is ready." Her sweet voice was like music, soft and almost haunting. Whenever she spoke, almost anybody would be able to almost taste the sadness in her voice, and everybody could hear the softness of the melody. Or maybe it was only me. Maybe I am only imagining the sadness. Maybe I am only imagining the melody in her voice. I mentally shrugged. No matter.

I stood and made my way towards the dining area. I loved Kaoru's cooking. It may not be the greatest, for I have had better, but nothing truly warmed my insides at the thought that she personally made this food. For *us*. A smile flitted across my face, but it disappeared as soon as I slid shut the shoji door. Kaoru was kneeling on the floor and setting up our dinner trays, and while her head was bowed over her task, I allowed myself to regard her warmly.

She was such a beautiful creature. Her beautiful eyes seemed to watch and take the world in, never judging, only watching, only accepting. She never seemed to take things for granted, and she—

"Kenshin, I—" She stopped, her eyes meeting mine, and for a moment, it seemed like only the two of us existed. The sound of the wind blowing outside seemed to fade from our ears, and even the silence seemed different. She smiled. "Kenshin, I made your favorite; miso soup."

I raised my eyebrow at her, letting my mask relax ever so slightly. "How did you know I liked miso best?"

Kaoru laughed quietly. "Well, when ever I make it, you seem to eat that first and the quickest, so I assumed that it was." She admitted. She cocked her head to the side at me as I settled down next to her. "It is, isn't it?"

I took up my chopsticks, purposefully not looking at her. I let a small smile come to my lips. "Aa."

I heard her laugh, and then we started eating.

I sighed as finished the last bit of the dishes. Even though I was used to it, I still hated doing them. My hands got all pruny and dry and . . . blek. I smiled. I was getting to be a lot livelier now a days, aren't I? Well, at least a little, Sano made sure I had enough fun to fill my days.

Sighing happily, I grabbed the sleeping yukata that I had picked up from my room before heading to do the dishes. Right now a nice hot bath sounded especially nice. I had a day off so I can be well rested for my night shift, but I couldn't sit still, so I stayed home and worked hard to clean the house. Kenshin was on the roof of the bathhouse fixing a couple of tiles that had flown off the other night by the wind, and I stayed inside scrubbing hard at anything that had dust on it.

Over all, it had been a very satisfying day.

Enishi hasn't been over yet, and I doubt he'll be coming back any time soon. They had fought, and Kenshin had won. Did they really think I wouldn't hear them? Enishi had screamed out his challenge, waking me from my slumber. I had sat in the hallway just outside the shoji, sitting on the floor and leaning up against the wall.

I had heard everything. From Enishi's challenge all the way to when he asked Kenshin of his regrets. And he had none.

I had cried then. Silent tears that didn't stop sliding down my cheeks until I heard the front gate thud shut, and Kenshin walking back to go to his rooms. I cried for Enishi, and the love I could never give him. I cried for Kenshin, and the fact that once he'll leave, I'll once again be alone.

I knew he was leaving—I reminded myself of it every day. I couldn't forget about it, because if I did I would only set my heart full of hope, only to have it break when he one day disappears. And I cried . . . for me. For the love I held for one man, and the heartache I was going to feel when I wake up one day and find his room empty.

I sighed. I really needed to stop thinking like this. I'll just stay sad and then I'll start to mope and then... well, then I'll look really pathetic. I survived a long time on my own—I'm stronger than this!

I frowned to myself as I stripped out of my clothes and started my bathing routine. I was stronger than this, and I knew that when Kenshin leaved I will be able to move on...I guess I just didn't like the idea of him leaving. I snorted softly as I dumped a bucket of lukewarm water over my head. It's not like I'll ever get used to the idea.

I sighed blissfully as I sunk down into the steaming water, silently thanking Kenshin for warming up the bath. How lucky am I? I have a guy who doesn't complain about housework and heats up the furo without even having to be asked. A flash of warm liquid topaz flashed through my head, and I smiled at the memory of his eyes. Yes, very lucky indeed.

"Kaoru? You in there?" His silky voice filtered through the air, and I mumbled something in response, sleep already on its way. "I have to leave on an... errand. I'll be back soon."

The only words I registered were 'leaving' and 'soon' and my once sleepy mind suddenly snapped to attention. Hurriedly, I jumped out of the water, slipping and nearly stubbing my toe. I cursed silently, one of the many words I picked up from Sano, and grabbed my robe. I tried to run across the floor, but I decided it was a bad idea seeing how I continuously slipped, so I settled for walking really fast. I slammed the door open, grasping my robe together at the chest, and raised my eyes to Kenshin's shocked ones.

My eyes widened and I started. I couldn't help it.

My eyes dropped from hers and followed a tiny drop of warm liquid run down her throat, down to the valley between her breasts. Her silky midnight hair swayed gently in the light breeze, some of the wet tresses of her bangs sticking to her face and neck. Her thin robe clinged to her soft and very wet body, making her clothes almost translucent. A slow blush started to creep up her neck, and I raised my eyes again to her blushing face.

I took a step towards her, and when she didn't step back, I took another and another until I stood just barely a hairs breadth away. Her head was bowed slightly to hide her blush, her bangs now hanging loosely, brushed against my chest. Her fingers still clenched tightly around the front of her robe. Gently, and very slowly, I reached one hand and grasped the one holding her robe, while my other rose to tilt her head up.

Her eyes were blue and luminous, swirling with emotions that I couldn't put a name too—too scared to put a name to—and she didn't bother hiding them. Her lips were parted slightly, her cheeks still had that adoring rosy blue. A single, solitary drop of water started its slow course down her cheek, and I couldn't stop myself from leaning forward and capturing it with my lips.

Her gasp was small and breathy when she felt my lips on her skin, so I lingered, caressing her softness slowly. She leaned forward to me slightly, almost unconsciously, and I groaned and finally wrapped my arms around her, burying my face in her neck. She stiffened slightly, and I rubbed my hands up and down her back in an attempt to help her relax.

A moment... only a moment is all I ask, to just hold her, and have her hold me in return.

Almost as if she heard my silent plea, Kaoru let go her robe and wrapped both of her arms around me, resting her head against my chest. I heard her sigh, and I raised my face to the sky and smiled in pure joy, before I rested my cheek against the top of her head.

I was supposed to fulfill an assignment tonight, even though it wasn't as if I had a time limit, but I just couldn't bring my self to let her go. She raised her head and looked at me, the beautiful eyes that I could never forget staring up at me just as she had when I first tilted her face to mine, and I gave her a smile.

The crickets chirped in the night, a few birds sung their last notes before bed, and the moon shown brightly, illuminating the moment when I lowered my head, and gently kissed her lips.

And caught up in the moment, neither of us noticed a pair of dark sinister eyes, gleaming in the dark maniacally, a slow grin stretching across his face.