Revenant: chapter 2: part 2

"So, Revan, I understand that the so called prodigal knight has questions for the council." Telan snapped from her seat, as soon as the click of the door echoed in the chamber. "We have many for you as well. The first is what the force you were thinking when you fell in love with Bastila? You know the code as well as she! Emotion, especially love, cannot be allowed for us Jedi!"

Revan looked at Telan with disdain. He felt the council's own discomfort with the Jedi master but also with him as well. Vreik opened his mouth and Revan heard the resignation in his voice.

"Master Telan, for the last time I will not…"

"Master Vreik?" Revan interrupted and the old master turned to him with a raised eyebrow. "If you will permit me I am quite happy to answer master Telan's question."

Vreik nodded and settled back into the chair, despite himself he too was interested. Revan cleared his throat and turned to Telan with a calm expression.

"I did not ask to fall for Bastila, master Telan. When we first met I have to say she was one of the most irritating and self-opinionated people I'd ever met. However it was the bond between us, the recognition of it as we trained as Jedi, that changed my opinion." He paused and smiled in memory. "She was so helpful to me during those difficult times and also so honest. I couldn't help it. The bond pulled us close, closer than I ever thought was possible and I… I found myself thinking about her all the time. She was so wonderful, so easy to irritate, so compassionate. Despite her arrogance, something I realise was to protect herself from me, I could feel her… her soul through the bond we share. Despite her own self control, she felt it too and, well, it seemed that the force wanted it."

Telan sat back in shock.

"The force? You think that the force desired you and Bastila to become lovers?" She snorted and waved a hand around the room. "See? What arrogance! To think that the force would bring two such powerful Jedi together, so that they could fall in love."

Revan frowned and felt his ire grow at her scornful tone. About to snap back at her, he was surprised to hear a soft female voice interject.

"Arrogance, master Telan? There is plenty of that already being shown in this chamber." Telan rankled at her tone and Sunrider smiled slightly at the Jedi master. "Once again you attack Revan and Bastila for falling in love, Telan, but tell me have you ever felt it yourself? Love can be powerful, so very powerful and overwhelming. We cannot forget that it was Revan's love for Bastila that brought her back to the light."

"And possibly sent her to the dark in the first place." Telan countered, her voice heated. "She acted rashly, foolishly due to the emotion she was feeling. If she and Revan had not fallen in love with one another, Bastila could have acted to the situation in a calm and collected manner. As it is, she stupidly sacrificed herself to save him, only to give Malak our most powerful weapon, her battle meditation!"

Revan looked at her with distaste and stepped up to the chair she sat in.

"Bastila is a person! Not a weapon or a tool you think you own or can use! She has been through hell and back to do what you asked her, lied to the person she loved and submitted to the most terrible tortures Malak could probably conceive. I would remind you, Telan, that she has as much right to her own feelings as you obviously do!"

"How dare you!" she snapped at him, even as he struggled to pull his anger back, the other council members flinching at the raw emotion swirling around the chamber. Vreik opened his mouth to restore calm, but Sunrider gently placed a hand on his shoulder and shook her head. "You would do well to remember where you are young Jedi! I am a master of the council and I will not be spoken to in that manner!"

Revan felt all the anger he'd bottled upon finding out that the council had wiped his mind, claw at his emotional controls. It came so close, so very close to breaching them but he fought back, his body shivering slightly under the strain. With a deep breath he stood back and centred himself, felt its effects soothe and heal the fractures in his barrier. But, for a fleeting second, he felt Bastila suddenly touch his mind in concern. He slipped defences in her path and her searching mind slipped back empty handed.

"You, and for that fact the entire council, are fine people to lecture me on what I should or should not do." He said in a chill voice, obviously controlled tightly. "After all we've been through together, you actually think I care if you will permit me to remain with Bastila or not? I love her and there's nothing you could do or say to stop me being with her!"

"We could split you up, move you to separate areas of our control!" Telan said, grinning as he flinched slightly. "I would very much like to do this actually, we do not need more difficulties at the moment with disobedient Jedi."

"If you do that," Revan said quietly, looking at her. "It will destroy Bastila, me too. If you even suggest that again." He turned to the entire council and his face was hard. "I will reject everything you have tried to teach me and leave, with Bastila if she desires it!"

"Revan, we have no desire at this time to prevent your union with young Bastila." Telan opened her mouth but Vreik held up a hand sharply, he had to defuse this situation and fast. "Telan, you do not dictate policy of the council. It will be decided in due course, however."

Revan breathed a sigh of relief and Telan snorted. With a sigh, Vreik addressed the council.

"We cannot ignore what master Sunrider has openly stated. Despite the code, the only thing that saved Bastila from the darkside was the love she had for Revan, it brought her back despite Malak's influence. The ways of the force are mysterious, even to one as old as I. I will not be one to interfere with any plan that it has for Revan or Bastila. The other council members would do well to heed me."

Telan scowled and sat back in her chair, radiating disapproval as the others nodded. Revan sighed inwardly with relief and looked at Vreik with a penitent smile.

"Now, if you have finished, may I ask a question?" He asked, looking around the room. Vreik nodded and Revan cleared his throat. "Here we go…"

"I would like to ask the council about the force discipline used to erase Revan's personality and memory from my mind."

Master Hieruk shifted in his chair and tilted his head at Revan.

" We did not do any such thing Jedi Revan. The council on Dantooine made the choice. We have no knowledge of the rite they used to perform such an act. "

Revan sighed and looked at him. He could feel the tender ground he trod on. The council would probably see any desire to find out about the Revan he used to be as a bad sign. With a deeper sigh he soldiered on, he had to know.

"Masters of the council, I realise that it was Dantooine's council that decided to wipe my mind. However, I can also make the logical assumption that it wasn't taken without consulting you first. I know you must have had a hand in the decision." He watched as a few of them looked at each other, slight signs of guilt passing across their faces. "I've no desire to lay blame, in fact I don't care at all who made the choice. All I want is to find out who I was before I fell to the darkside."

Vreik looked at him and shook his head.

"You want more than that young Knight, I can tell. What is it you are not telling us?"

Pausing, Revan looked at the tiny master in front of him. What he wanted tore at him, as much as the guilt and pain of what he had once been did. He cleared his throat, suddenly nervous.

"Malak called me a puppet. Something that the council created to control and use to their advantage." He felt the pain of what he was saying, trickle into the bond, and fought to stop Bastila feeling anything. "I want to know how much truth is in what he told me. Master Vandar told me that it's amazing I even stand before you today. He said that I should be a vegetable, just capable of feeding myself and walking around."

Sunrider glanced at Vreik who remained staring at Revan intently.

"If that's the case then why did my mind fix itself? If it didn't then what did? Where did who I am come from? I know that they gave me a past, gave me a history that could fit in to anything anyone asked me." He looked around and the pain and despair slipped in to his voice. "But who am I? What am I? Please, if you know anything, I ask you to help me!"

Hieruk looked at Revan and sighed, his deep voice resonating around the chamber.

" I have been a friend of Master Dooruk for many years. " He said quietly. " The rite that they used to focus the force to heal your damaged mind, to erase the taint of Lord Revan is ancient. I am sure master Vandar explained that the holocron describing what it actually did is lost. "

"So the vast archives even here, are useless to me?"

" I am afraid so. While we can, and will, give you information about who you used to be and I can also provide you with information on the rite used to heal and erase your mind, how it managed to do this is lost to us. I am sorry."

"Why did you use it in the first place if you know so little about it?" He asked quietly, knowing the answer.

"Because we had no other choice." Sunrider responded, as quietly as he had posed the question. "We were losing people all over the galaxy. Your past self had huge fleets of ships and the tactical skill to employ them. So when Bastila saved your broken body, we had a desperate chance to use the knowledge you carried to our advantage."

"I know all about how she saved my life!" He muttered, opening his eyes and looking at her. "The memories, that's another thing I need answers to! If you erased my mind, how come I get memory flashes of my past? Dreams that I wake screaming from? Why can I sometimes feel lord Revan almost looking over my shoulder? Even Jolee said I was unfocused, as though darkness hung over me! What am I?" The question ripped itself from him, despite his best efforts.

"We don't know and we cannot help you." Vreik answered softly, his eyes a mirror of Revan's pain. "I am so very sorry, Revan, but it is as master Vandar said. We on Coruscant have no answers for you."

Revan felt sick and closed his eyes as total despair swept through him. Sunrider watched him from her chair and felt only compassion for the redeemed Sith lord standing before her. He hadn't asked for any of this. To find out he had been the leader of the brutal enemy they now fought must have shattered everything he'd believed in. Now, with Bastila the only thing keeping him going, all the council's vast knowledge was absolutely useless. She sighed and Revan looked at her.

"I, for one, wish to apologise young knight." Surprised faces peered at her from around the room. "For all you once did as the dark lord Revan, it's obvious you aren't him anymore. We did a terrible thing when we advised you should not be told who you were. That was wrong and it put you and Bastila in terrible danger, both from yourself when you found the truth and her guilt at keeping this secret that helped Malak turn her."

Revan shuffled slightly in the middle of the council chamber and looked at her with a weak smile.

"I suppose that I'm back to square one then." He laughed slightly, but there was no amusement in it. "So what do I do now?"

"Wait for the council to decide what to do with you, as all Jedi do!" Telan said and Revan looked at her, eyes flashing.

"Who said I want to remain a Jedi?" He asked and a ripple shot through the council, followed by a groan from the majority. "I did what you really wanted, I destroyed the forge, killed Malak. I've 'paid' for my new life. The council on Dantooine… you as well… cannot escape that what you did could be considered an injustice. You should have let her tell me, as soon as I woke up! What reason can you possibly give for me to stay?"

"Revan…" Sunrider began and he looked at her. "You've proved yourself as a force of good and The Jedi need you right now. You know as well as we do, that the battle with the Sith is far from over. Please, we need you."

"I know," He sighed. "But what the council did…"

"Vandar and the others did it for the greater good, please try to understand, to forgive. It was an injustice to you but a necessary one. Let us prove to you that the council does things for good."

"I find it hard to believe anything the council says." Revan muttered and Sunrider winced at his bitter tone. A sudden thought struck him and he looked up. "If you really want me to stay as a Jedi, I need a favour."

"Favour?" Vreik asked and he swapped a glance with Sunrider and Hieruk. "What would that be?"

Revan told them and the council leaders glanced at each other.

"We can do that I think." Sunrider said. "It's a lot of money though, but if it helps you forgive our order… shows our appreciation for all you've done."

"Thank you masters." Revan looked around the room. "It does mean a lot to me. She, as you know, means a lot to me."

"I'm sure. Now, please return to the conference room. We need to discuss a few things." Vreik looked around the council and sighed. "We will call Bastila and yourself back once we have decided what to do. This could take a while, so please be patient."

Dejected by the lack of answers, Revan slowly walked out of the council chamber. He needed to talk to someone, but the one person he could had shut him out. With a sigh he walked slowly back to the conference chamber. He had to patch things up with Bastila, before he couldn't hold on anymore.

Vreik waited for a few seconds after the door slid quietly shut behind him and turned to the other council members.

"It seems Vandar is correct, Revan is a totally different person… very interesting."

"How do we know that?" Telan snorted. "He could be lying, wants to corrupt us from the inside." Many masters looked at her with contempt but she continued, oblivious. "Look at Bastila, how can she be in love with someone like that? Someone who wiped planets from the galaxy! How do we know he isn't controlling her?"

"Don't be ridiculous!" Sunrider snapped. "We need to only look at all the good things he did before leaving to find the starmaps to see he's changed. Lord Revan would never have bothered with the Sandral and Matale feud, or taken on the Mandalorian raiders leader. Plus he did save Bastila from the darkside, when he loved her too. I wonder how tempting it was for him to join her in the darkness? Even with her passion attempting to corrupt him, he pulled her back to the light, knowing that he ran the risk of we, the council, splitting them forever! Now he wants us to help him find his place. That's not the work of a dark Sith lord to me!"

"Plus, we must take into consideration the fact that he did destroy the Starforge and Malak." Vreik said quietly, looking at his hands. "Without him, even Admiral Dodonna has admitted that Bastila would have wiped them out. Besides, we need him now, more than ever. Although weakened, the Sith are still fighting. They have more resources than we or the Republic have available at this time." He paused and looked round the council. "We need Revan and Bastila together, and we need them at the peak of their abilities"

"You intend to go against the Senate then Master Vreik?" Telan asked in shock. "You know as well as I that half the house have demanded Revan be put on trial for the war crimes he committed before we erased his mind!"

"While the other half see him as a figurehead for the fight, a redeemed Jedi who vanquished Malak." Sunrider argued softly. "Master Vreik is right, Telan, even you can see that. Bastila and Revan are needed terribly right now. The Sith 6th fleet is beginning to assemble to assault the Tangelos Tabana gas mines. We need Bastila's battle meditation to swing the battle, but she can't do that if we arrest Revan and lock him away, it'll devastate her."

Looking around she cleared her throat.
"We all, I know, felt Bastila's pain and guilt. It was terrible and the only thing keeping her going, even if she knows it or not, is Revan's strength, his love…" She paused and looked at Vriek, his face thoughtful once more. "She will need him if she is to vanquish the pain left inside, to find a way to cope."

"I still say it's a bad idea!" Telan muttered. "Two Jedi, of such power and in love is dangerous."

Sunrider sighed and Telan sat back, her face dark.

"What's worse is Revan himself." Sunrider continued, looking around the room and finding the majority of heads nodding in agreement. "We can only guess how he feels about himself right now. A Jedi has powerful emotional control, it is when that control is broken that the danger lies. I don't know about anyone else, but Revan must be nearing the limits of his ability."

"What are you talking about?" Telan snapped. "Revan is a puppet, a personality that the council on Dantooine implanted in his mind. I'm sure he has all the emotional control he needs."

"Really? That's not what I saw when you attacked him about his involvement with Bastila. He was so close to snapping, Telan, you're lucky he managed to rein it back." Sunrider sighed and looked at the council with a frown. "He may have a… a history that was imprinted by the masters on Dantooine but from what I've seen, from what our own chronicler master Hieruk has told us, we have no idea what personality has been placed there. I worry for his mental stability,"

Sunrider glanced at Vreik and Hieruk with a frown.

"He has found that his life is a lie, that we erased his memory and gave him a new past. That he was the Dark lord of the Sith and is responsible for countless acts of terror and evil. To top it all, we do not have the answers he seeks about himself." She sighed and thought back to the crushing defeat she'd felt from him as he had left the council chamber. "I don't know how much longer he can keep going, I only hope Bastila can help him through the difficult times ahead."

Vreik nodded and Sunrider sat back down. He looked around the room.

"Bastila is strong enough I feel to support him, but only if she can rid herself of the guilt she feels over her fall to the darkside. I have to agree with Revan, any blame we assign to Bastila would be wrong. Many more powerful masters have fallen to the darkside when under the torture of Malak. To punish Bastila, a Padawan who managed to resist him for as long as any of us could, would be a terrible injustice. As for her own self-charge of murder. Considering that it was a Sith torturer, and also that it was Malak's idea to use this against her… I cannot see any reason for us to discipline her over this."

With a sigh, Vreik steepled his fingers once more.

"I must also present the practical side to the council. Bastila is young but from the evidence of her resistance to Malak's physical and force based torture, coupled with her development of battle meditation, Bastila will be able to harness her power as much as Revan someday. Together they could be our most powerful force for good."

"All the more reason to separate them in my opinion, as I've said already. If Revan becomes dangerous, if he loses control of himself as master Sunrider says, worse if he turns to the darkside, we will need Bastila to stop him."

"I didn't say Revan was mentally unstable as of now!" Sunrider said sharply at Telan. "Just that he needs our support at the moment. Finding out that everything they believe is a lie would shock anyone. All I'm saying is that Revan needs our compassion and, more importantly, Bastila at this time. To separate them at all would be wrong both on a moral and logical standpoint. I will object to any attempt to do so!"

With a sigh Vreik looked around the council at the other masters.

"We will now vote on the fate of Bastila, Revan and possibly the Republic. I just hope that the bond between them is as strong as I hope." He looked at Sunrider who shook her head. "I just hope that the two of them can find peace, or forgiveness, in one another's company."