Potter47 Part One
Old Friends "When one does not know what it is, then it is something;
But when one knows what it is, it is nothing." Chapter Eight
Shattered
"Not quite so fast, my Queen," said Harpia resolutely, as Luna was about to spring from her throne.
"What?" asked Luna impatiently. "Ronald is missing, I have to find him!"
"Exactly!" said Harpia. "The King is missing. There are Dark forces at work, my Queen. You must be careful. If you simply charge out of the palace, you are sure to be captured by the Envelope's servants. You cannot be sure who to trust."
"But what are we to do?" said Luna anxiously. "We cannot just sit here…"
"That is why I have asked one of your brightest servants to help us," said Harpia, flying over off of her perch and across the hall. "Miss Granger!" she called. A familiar face hurried into the hall, and scurried to the throne.
Luna looked down on her suspiciously. "How do we know that she can be trusted? For all we know, she kidnapped Ronald herself!"
"I would never!" said Miss Granger. "I would never do anything to harm the king!"
"She is trustworthy," said Harpia. Something about the way her friend said 'trustworthy' made all of Luna's doubts disappear. It seemed almost...magical.
"I apologise for doubting you, Miss Granger. I'm sure you can understand that I'm... jumpy at the moment."
"Please, call me Hermione," said Hermione.
"No thank you," said Luna. "You're a Snorkack consultant, aren't you Miss Granger? Why do you think you'd be of help in finding Ronald?"
"You see," said Harpia, "Hermione here scored higher than anyone has in years on her S.N.O.R.C.A.C.K.s." Which, of course, stood for Sadly Necessary Ordinary Regular Customary Assessment Check for Kids. "Especially in Defence Against Envelopes of Darkness." Which, as you know, the students generally referred to as D.E.A.D., despite the order of the words.
"How many did she get?" asked Luna curiously.
"Forty-seven," said Hermione modestly. "I did horrible, I know—"
"Forty-seven? Really?" said Luna disbelievingly. "But the last person to do that, was—"
"The Wizard," said Harpia, nodding. "Miss Granger here is among great company.
"Wizard?" said Hermione. "What do you mean, 'wizard'? Wizards are mythical beings told about to children in fairy tales."
"I thought you were smart," said the Queen. "There is only one wizard in all of Logica-Land. The Wizard. There is now, at least. My great..." she paused, thinking, "-great-uncle was a Wizard, I hear, but he left the land years ago."
"But who is he? Where is he? Why haven't I read anything about him!" Hermione said, panicked. "Surely I must have read something…"
"The Wizard prefers his secrecy," explained Harpia. "But this is urgent. We must go to him."
"Go to him?" said Luna confuzzledly. "But the Wizard hasn't let anyone see him for years. I doubt he would now, even in such times as this."
"Which is exactly why I found Miss Granger," said Harpia. "I believe that the Wizard may in fact let Hermione in, if for the simple reason that they are intellectual peers."
"You never know, when it comes to the Wizard," said Luna sensibly. "It's worth a shot. What do you think, Miss Granger?"
"What?" said Hermione, not comprehending a thing that was going on about her. She could not fathom a response other than "what?" which she now said once again. "What?"
"Oh, this'll never work," said Luna exasperatedly. "She doesn't seem very smart…are you sure she didn't cheat on her exams?"
"I didn't cheat!" exclaimed Hermione indignantly.
"She didn't cheat," said Harpia.
"I simply don't understand what you're telling me to—"
Crash!
"What was that?" said Luna suddenly, looking up.
The crash, it seemed, had sounded from the great stained-glass window across the room from Luna's throne. It usually depicted a great big sky, which, of course, was what was beyond it. But the intricate details of glass were lost, and now were falling. Falling faster than a snail, if that snail had been dropped off the top of something very tall.
It had shattered.
"We must fly," said Harpia. She swooped around and prodded Luna out of her chair, before leading the two women down the great hall.
"Fly?" said Hermione anxiously, running. "But we're not half-birds!"
The trio walked (or flew) quickly and quietly. After the shock of the window's shattering, it was impossible for Luna to even wonder what would come next.
"I wonder what will come next," said Hermione. "After that window...I don't know what to expect."
"You shouldn't know what to expect," said Luna. "This is Logica-Land, after all."
"I know that, but—"
"Both of you, please shut your mouths," said Harpia. "We must reach the Shelter."
"Shelter?" asked Hermione, not comprehending, which seemed to be her fashion as of late.
"Are you sure she didn't cheat?" asked Luna once again. "She really seems to be a bit incompetent."
"I'm not incompetent! I just don't understand," defended Hermione. "You have to admit, I've been thrown into unexpected circumstances!"
"I said, shut up!" hissed Harpia. "No disrespect intended, my Queen," she added.
"But what is the shelter?" asked Hermione, nearly tripping on a Snorkack cub, which had wandered onto the sidewalk they were running along.
"You don't know how to shut up, do you Miss Granger?" said Luna, annoyed. "Fine. The Shelter is a location that is used in emergencies. King Ronald and myself have never needed to use it, as the Envelope had been in hiding. But in the past, kings and queens have taken cover there, while trying to figure a way to defeat the Dark."
"But that is not why we need to reach the Shelter," said Harpia, flapping her wings in such a way as to clear the road for her two-legged companions. "We need to reach the Shelter to use the Private Passage."
"The Passage?" repeated Luna, thinking. "Yes, that is the best way..."
"What is the Passage?"
"It's a—" began Harpia, but she stopped. "We cannot discuss it in public. You'll see what it is when we get there."
And so, at last, a miracle happened.
"It's a miracle," said Luna. "She's not talking."
Hermione was going to think of a snide comeback to that, but she realised that not only would that require talking, but this was the Queen. Believe me, it is never a good idea to try to make a snide remark about a queen, to that queen. It is just not wise.
Of course, the three did not exactly blend in to their surroundings. A Harpy, a servant, and a queen never have much luck in that department. In particular, Harpia's brilliant black feathers and Luna's royal blue robes stood out from the crowd. The townsfolk made no secret their conversations about them.
"It's the Queen!" cried some of them. "I thought she was napping..."
"'at can' be ta Queen!" said one. "Wha's she doin' wit' a servan' girl?"
"Look! A birdie!"
"I resent that," muttered Harpia. It seems that a big, great, half-bird, half-woman is one sure-fire way to make an entire village forget about their troubles and want to pet her.
"Look at her shiny feathers! Look at her glittering claws!"
"My claws do not glitter!"
"Look at her beak!"
"I don't have a beak!"
They proceeded in much this fashion as they continued on their "secret" journey to the Shelter. By "secret" with "quotation marks", I mean of course that is wasn't much of a secret at all, but was intended to be.
With a last "Can I please pet you, Birdie?", they managed to duck away from the crowd and into an alleyway off of the High Street. Harpia stroked her feather along the stone wall, counting under her breath. "One, two, three," and so forth, until she reached stone twelve. She tapped the stone, again and again, with her left claw.
"What's she—" began Hermione, but fell into silence when she saw what happened.
Harpia tapped the stone twelve times, and muttered something under her breath. The stone seemed to be sucked into the wall, followed by its neighbours. The process repeated until there was a large enough hole in the wall for a person to climb through.
"You first, my Queen," said Harpia, bowing.
"Thank you," said Luna, before quickly climbing inside the hole. Hermione followed silently, and Harpia swooped in last.
Closing the hole in the wall, Harpia turned to Hermione and Luna. "Here we are."
They were in a worn-down building, with old, tattered rugs, a square table in the centre of the room, with two chairs and a perch.
"Well, that's convenient," said Hermione sensibly. "This is the Shelter, then?"
"This?" scoffed Luna. "You think this is the shelter?"
"This is just a Resting Place," said Harpia. "But we don't have time to waste here. We must continue to the Shelter."
She flew into a small doorway, having to tuck her wings in a bit to do so. She emerged again with a piece of parchment, that I happen to know had been hidden in the back of a toaster, and would easily have been burnt if someone had decided that they wanted waffles in the morning.
"What's that?" asked Hermione questioningly.
"This is the way into the Shelter," said Harpia.
"What does it say?" asked Luna.
"As you know, my Queen, it is a question. You must answer correctly to open the wall to access the Shelter."
"What is it?" asked Hermione and Luna at the same time.
"It says:
"Oh, that's simple," said Hermione simply. "It's three-point-four-six-four-one-o-one-six-one-five-one-three-seven-seven-five-four-five-eight-seven-o-five-four-eight-nine-two-six-eight-three-o-one-one-seven, of course."
The wall, however, stayed just where it was.
"Are you mad?" asked Luna, staring at Hermione. "That's not the square root of twelve. The square root of twelve is this."
And she reached into her pocket, pulling out an unusual object. It seemed to be formed of tree roots, threaded together to form a two-dimensional cube. In fancy script on both sides of it, was the number
"The square root of twelve," said Luna to the wall, "is formed of tree roots, threaded together to form a two-dimensional cube. In fancy script, on both sides of it, is the number twelve."
The door sprung open, for it was now a door, and not a wall like it had been just a moment before.
"What—" began Hermione, but she silenced herself as Harpia swooped into the open door and Luna followed. Hermione went as well.
The door led to a set of stairs, that led up to the basement below them. It emerged into a dusty cellar, and Hermione couldn't help asking.
"Is this the shelter?" she asked.
"Of course not. This is the cellar. We must go farther down," said Luna.
"There," said Harpia, pointing at the ceiling with her left wing. "That trapdoor. We need to go up that."
"But," began Hermione, "I thought we needed to go down..."
Either the Harpy and Queen did not hear, or they simply ignored her. Harpia flipped upside-down, which was sure to be a very nauseating experience, believe me, and grabbed for the trapdoor's knob with her left claw.
As you may know from personal experience, when one is a bird, and they try to fly upside down, there are not usually positive results. Usually, the bird crashes to the ground, cracks his or her skull, and remembers never to try such a thing ever again. Or, the bird simply cannot grasp the doorknob, and they slip to the ground and break a wing. So, if you are a bird, it is probably best that you do not try any aerial acrobatics having to do with inverted doorknobs in the first place.
Luckily, this has no relevance whatsoever to Harpia's situation. She was able to clasp the knob and turn and pull and the trapdoor was opened within a matter of seconds.
Harpia flew up into this new room and reached her right wing down to the floor above. "Grab my wing," she said, "and I'll pull you up."
Luna went first, grasping the beautiful black feathers carefully, so as to not pull any out. It was difficult to be pulled up, but Harpia was strong and Luna was light for her size.
Hermione went up more or less the same, though she was a bit more reluctant to be pulled up by the bird into the floor below. It just didn't make any sense, in her mind at least.
"Is this the shelter?" asked Hermione, quite positive that it would not be, and they would have to pass another illogical barrier. The room they were in was dingy and dark, and she could hardly see beyond the tip of her nose. In fact, it seemed too dark, and if a great beast was about to approach from behind, they'd never know.
"No," said Harpia. She reached down with her claw and pulled the door back into place, which was much, much easier because she was right-side up. The door blended in perfectly with the floor, and it seemed as though they simply were in a room with a small golden doorknob poking out of the floor; which, they kind of were. "Now it is."
"What?"
"Now it is the Shelter."
Hermione turned around once again, expecting to see the same dark and grimy room. However, in place of the blackness was the brightest of lights, and in place of the dinginess under her feet was a clean, cool floor. The walls looked to be made of diamond. They were the shiniest and brightest walls that any of the three had ever seen. The room was amazing. They owed it awe.
"Wow," said Hermione. "It's amazing."
"Yes, it is," said Luna agreeably, an adverb that is not usually used in the context of Luna and Hermione.
"Yes, it's simply wonderful," said Harpia. "Too bad we must leave at once."
And so they left at once, through a small crack in the wall that grew larger as the trio grew nearer.
"Is this the Passage?" asked Hermione.
"Almost," said Harpia. "This is the start of the Private Passage. Before we reach the end, there will be three more questions."
It was, as Hermione realised,a long passage. Or Passage, as the case may be. The three walked (or flew) for what seemed like hours and hours. Luna thought about Ronald, what might be happening to him, where he might be. Hermione thought about what questions they could possibly be faced with, and if the logical answer would actually work. And Harpia thought about her wings, wondering if they would ever be the same after brushing against the dusty walls so much.
At last, they reached what seemed to be the first barrier.
"This seems to be the First Barrier," said Harpia. She brushed her wing against the stone wall in front of them, making the dust fall out of the cracks. Inscribed on the wall were words, though they were not the same as the question above the Shelter. These were not merely a question:
charming as a nursery rhyme, as challenging as a duel.
I accompany you from cradle to grave,
providing laughter for childhood,
literary games for middle age,
and wisdom tests for elders.""Guess my gnomic name, if you can."
"This isn't merely a question," said Hermione. "No, no. Even the greatest people in all of Logica-Land would be stuck here, if they couldn't figure it out."
"Well, so will we, won't we?" asked Harpia. "That's why the Wizard put the question here; to keep us out."
"Of course we won't," said Hermione. "As I said, this isn't merely a question. A question can use outside sources. But this... all the information we need is right here, written on the wall."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, it's a riddle, and—"
But as soon as Hermione had uttered the word "riddle" she was silenced. The wall in front of them had melted away, as if it were something very, very hard that had been enveloped in fire, and in time had melted away, though this happened much, much quicker.
"What happened?" asked Luna. "It just—"
"Riddle," said Hermione. "The answer must have been riddle. Funny, I didn't even get a chance to think about it..."
"Never mind that now," said Harpia. "We must fly."
"Will you stop saying that?"
They continued walking down the long passageway, which was a bit darker than it was before, as if it was going deep into the heart of a mountain, and someone had forgotten to turn on the electricity.
Before long, they came to another wall. It was the second barrier.
"This is the Second Barrier," said Harpia. "I presume it will be another riddle—" and here she paused, as if making sure that the wall did not melt away again. "Too bad."
This one read:
I am the daughter of the Titans.
I have the body of a lion, the wings of a bird,
and the head of a woman.
I am more obscure than oracles,
and more puzzling than gods.
I ask travellers questions that their lives depend on.""O wise one, weigh your words well and say what I am."
"'The wings of a bird and the head of a woman'?" repeated Harpia questioningly. "I think I'd like to meet her."
"This one's too simple," said Hermione, carefully avoiding uttering the answer. "Everyone knows this…there must be a trick."
"If you know the answer," said Luna, "then say it."
"Fine," said Hermione. "The Sphinx."
The wall melted away again, in the same fashion it did after Hermione said "riddle". But this time, instead of a faintly darker walkway, there was something much more menacing.
"Maybe I wouldn't," said Harpia, adding to her previous thought.
For standing in front of them was a sphinx. It had the body of an overlarge lion: great clawed paws and a large yellowish tail ending in a brown tuft. Sprouting from behind the shoulders were great wings, practically transparent, that could blend right into her fur. Her head, however, was that of a woman. So, basically, it was just as the riddle had said.
She turned her almond-shaped eyes on the group. She spoke:
"You are very near your goal. But you must pass me to reach it."
"What is your riddle?" asked Hermione, not looking the sphinx in the face. Sadly, the razor-sharp claws were not a very pleasant sight to behold, either.
"You are well-read, then," said the sphinx. "Lucky you. You have one guess. If you are wrong, I attack. If you are silent, I will let you walk away.
"Here is my riddle:
walks with four legs in the morning,
with two legs at midday, and with three legs
when the sun has gone down?"
"That's simple," said Luna. "Obviously, it is a Whirly-Tailed—" she began, but Hermione practically attacked her, putting her hands over her mouth, and pulling back from the beast.
"How dare you!" exclaimed Luna. "I am your Queen, you don't— you shouldn't—"
"I'm sorry, Queen Luna," said Hermione apologetically. "But you must not simply answer the riddle. You may be wrong, and then—"
"But I'm not wrong!" said Luna. "The Whirly-Tailed Snorkack has four legs in the morning, two at midday, and three at night! It's the only possible answer."
"No, it's not. Besides, that's the Swirly-Tailed, remember?"
"Oh, right. That's what I meant."
"Just...let me answer."
Hermione walked back to the sphinx, where Harpia was twittering nervously against the wall. "Could you repeat your riddle?"
"Yes:
walks with four legs in the morning,
with two legs at midday, and with three legs
when the sun has gone down?"
"Thank you."
Hermione was confuzzled, and that was a very rare thing. She couldn't help thinking that she had heard this riddle before, though she couldn't remember when. It had to be metaphorical, because riddles were not simply trivia questions that can be answered at face value. There had to be some trick.
And then she recalled something. In History of Fictional Places class, they had learned about a fictional society known as Ancient Greece. This place had great Fictional Mythology. In one such myth, Professor Buckets had said, a man named Oedipus encountered a sphinx. That sphinx's question had been very similar, if not congruent, with the one that had been asked now.
"It is a human being," she answered calmly, "who crawls on all fours as a baby, walks upright on two legs in middle age, and in old age stumbles along with a cane."
The sphinx nodded her great head, and melted away just as the walls had done. "Well," said Hermione. "That was oddly logical."
"This is Logica-Land, after all," said Luna sensibly.
"Exactly," countered Hermione.
"We must fly," said Harpia.
And so they flew.
Author's NoteWell, first off, I've decided to change all the asterisks to this little symbol thingy:
This is because the very, very nice people at have decided that asterisks are evil, and should be stripped from all documents. I do hope, to those who are not reading this on , that you don't mind.
In other news, the pop culture contest for chapter six has now ended. I received a few responses, and only one person, (who shall remain nameless), managed to get absolutely nothing right at all (I think—there may have been two).
If you have sent in answers before the posting of this chapter, you will be counted, even if I haven't sent you anything yet. I haven't had a chance to check my email or reviews in the past couple days, and someone may have submitted before this went up. Don't worry.
The answers are:
Pop Culture Reference Number One (1):
"They are highly nutritional and tasty breakfast foods. Eleven essential vitamins and minerals, I believe."This refers, of course, to Pop Tarts. However, the reference I was looking for was not the Pop Tarts themselves, but the line "eleven essential vitamins and minerals." This was said in the forty-ninth episode of the TV series "The Pretender" though I do doubt that Pop Tarts actually contain eleven. I could have sworn there were nine.
Pop Culture Reference Number Two (2):
"Please, Dad, don't tell me you started informing him of the nutritional benefits of Pop Tarts...""No, I finished informing him of the nutritional benefits of Pop Tarts,""I asked you not to tell me that..."This is one of many catchphrases from the TV show "Get Smart" starring Don Adams as Agent 86, Maxwell Smart. Frankly, I'm surprised no one got it.
Pop Culture Reference Number Three (3):
"He likes it! Hey Mikey!"This is, of course, from the Life Cereal television adverts. Duh.
Pop Culture Reference Number Four (4):
"I've fallen and I can't get up!"From the Life Alert adverts. This has been made fun of in numerous different comedies and parodies. Kinda funny that the last one was from the Life Cereal adverts. They must be affiliated.
Pop Culture Reference Number Five (5):
Alas, I forgot about this one when I made the contest. Silly me. Luckily, no one got more than three, so they didn't get anywhere near five.
These are from the Food Network TV show "Good Eats" from which I also got the chapter title. I cannot believe I forgot about it. Sorry 'bout that, Chief.
And so that ends the contest. I may have future ones in the...well, future, but for now let's just keep focused on the story, eh?
Oh, and one last note to reviewer plasterwork: That's Mister Pushy, to you!
Said his father. "Don't give yourself airs!
Do you think I can listen all day to such stuff?
Be off, or I'll kick you downstairs!'"
Lewis Carroll Coming Soon