I see through you.
Author's note: Post Before I sleep, the song is by Evanescence 'Where will you go'.
"The note she left. It's planets known to have ZPM's." Elizabeth said excitedly, leaving the bedside of her other self and turning to McKay and Sheppard.
"They could still be there!" John said, taking the letter from Rodney's hand.
"And 7G677 is on here! This is amazing! Elizabeth we've got…" Rodney suddenly broke off, staring at the woman on the bed.
A long beeping sound filled the room and Elizabeth suddenly knew what had happened. Her double was dead. Her past and future self…was dead.
Elizabeth Weir was dead.
Elizabeth suddenly felt numb. Staring at the body of herself, she took a tentative step forward. She felt as though a part of herself died along with her other self.
You're too important for anyone
You play the role of all you long to be
But I, I know who you really are
You're the one who cries when you're alone
A hand gently gripped her upper arm and a voice was speaking in the background but none of it mattered. None of it mattered.
Closing her eyes, she felt an arm wrap around her waist, keeping her upright. She leaned heavily on the chest behind her and felt slightly reassured at the heartbeat against her cheek.
John's breath tickled her ear.
"It's not you Elizabeth." He whispered, brushing loose strands of hair behind her ear with his free hand.
'The best part of my life is just beginning…I'm exploring a new city…'Shivering slightly, and not from the cold, Elizabeth straightened up, breaking away from John's embrace. The body had been covered, and McKay had left the room, leaving just her and John.
But where will you go
With no one left to save you from yourself
You can't escape
You can't escape
"Thanks John." She whispered, wiping the unshed tears from her face.
John nodded in understanding, staring at the sheet that now covered the body.
Elizabeth noticed his expression of extreme sadness and confusion and became confused herself.
"What is it John?" Major Sheppard glanced from the body to Elizabeth and back to the body.
"I should have saved you…" He whispered, screwing his eyes shut.
Elizabeth felt her sadness overshadowed by confusion.
"What?"
He looked down, glancing at Liz before turning away. But Elizabeth's curiosity was spiked and she pulled him back, taking his hand in hers.
You think that I can't see right through your eyes
Scared to death to face reality
No one seems to hear your hidden cries
You're left to face yourself alone
"I'm right here John." She whispered, tilting his head up so he was looking into her eyes.
He shook his head.
"I should never have let you suffer like you did. I should have known how to fly that puddle jumper and I should have saved you."
Elizabeth rested a hand on his chest
"You did save me John." She whispered. "You saved the entire expedition team by getting her away from Atlantis. If you didn't, we would all be dead. Including me."
John nodded slightly. He obviously didn't agree.
"I'm her John." She whispered, glancing at the body. "I'm still alive. You didn't fail. You saved her. And me."
John finally nodded, shaking his head, as if he were in stupor and looked at her hand, which was still on his chest.
I realize you're afraid
But you can't abandon everyone
You can't escape
You don't want to escape
"Look at this. Your double…past…err…she just died and your comforting me!"
Elizabeth sighed and turned, staring at the sheet.
"She gave her life to ensure ours." She whispered.
John wrapped his arms around her middle and rested his chin on her shoulder.
"She'll live on Elizabeth. In you."
Elizabeth turned. Staring into his eyes, with his arms still around her, they stared at each other, she stared into his dark, mysterious brown eyes and his into her brown, slightly green ones.
Smiling nervously, John lowered his head slightly and brought his lips to Elizabeth's.
The kiss was quick, both pulled back, feeling disrespectful to the Elizabeth Weir who had just died.
'Trust yourself Elizabeth…All that matters is right now'
The voice echoed through her brain, and she smiled slightly, knowing everything was going to be all right.
I'm so sick of speaking words that no one understands
Is it clear enough that you can't live your whole life all alone
I can hear you in a whisper
But you can't even hear me screaming
Walking from the infirmary, John with his arm resting lightly on her back, they ran into McKay and Ford, who stared, mouths open in surprise as John wrapped his arm around Elizabeth's shoulders and she leaned into his embrace.
"E-Elizabeth…" McKay began, a smile breaking out onto his face.
Liz nodded as John and her began to walk in the direction of the control room.
Later…
Elizabeth slowly spread the ashes of her other self from the balcony off the control room. They slowly fell before catching in the wind and blowing over Atlantis. Sighing slightly as she leaned over the edge, the door behind her opened and footsteps echoed behind her.
Turning around, she found herself face to face with John.
"We're about to start out mission briefing…so…"
Elizabeth nodded slightly.
"I'll be right there."
John nodded and turned to leave, but stopped as Elizabeth called his name.
"Actually John…Give me a minute, will you?"
"Sure." John nodded and left, avoiding with his eyes the sight of the vase in Elizabeth's hands.
Elizabeth turned and leaned over the edge, staring at the sea in the distance. She wondered how Atlantis would change after this. She wondered how her and John's relationship would change now. She worried slightly that she had now ruined their close friendship. John could have any woman he ever wanted, and she wasn't sure this relationship would work out.
"Have I done the right thing?" She asked herself out loud.
She jumped as a voice answered.
"You never did anything wrong."
Turning, she found John, smiling his usually goofy grin. He walked up beside her.
"John?" She asked, confused.
John stared at her.
"You look different." He said, cocking his head to the side.
Elizabeth frowned in confusion.
"What?"
"I died." He said, answering her question. "I'm here for Elizabeth. The other one."
Suddenly it dawned.
This was the first John Sheppard.
But where will you go
With no one left to save you from yourself
You can't escape
You can't escape
He glanced at the vase that she held in her hand, and Elizabeth held it out. From the vase, as John gripped it too, a light burst out, changing into the shape of herself.
"Elizabeth." Said John happily, letting go of the vase and walking to the Elizabeth Weir.
The dead Weir glanced at her hands, before glancing at the real one.
Smiling, the two ghosts took each other's hands and smiled, vanishing in a large burst of light.
And behind the light John Sheppard, the real one, looked on in confusion.
"What was that? It looked…it looked like…me."
Elizabeth smiled gently and walked forward, staring into his eyes before kissing him.
"I love you John Sheppard."
John smiled, and ran a hand along her cheek.
"I love you, Elizabeth Weir."
I realize you're afraid
But you can't reject the whole world
You can't escape
You won't escape
You can't escape
You don't want to escape
The End.