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Howl: The Life and Times of Remus J. Lupin

"It was a dark and stormy night, well not exactly stormy, but there were many "o" cloud in the sky, anyway, the moon shone high above me when I heard a rustling in a nearby bush, I slowly approached it and "Remus have you seen the remote?"

"No I haven't, now can you please keep quiet, I am trying to write a musical about the memoirs of my life!"

"Ok but if you do happen to come across a memory of where you put it, because I know you had it last Mr. Book TV junkie, then would you please tell me?"

"Alright, now if you'll please."

"Please what?"

"Shut up!"

"Ok"

I slowly approached the bush in question when I heard a howl that screeched through my being, and teeth that ram shacked my flesh. I awoke in a daze a day later...

"HOW CAN THIS BE, WHAT DOES IT MEAN?"

"REMUS, YOU ARE A WEREWOLF!"

"A WEREWOLF?!?"

"A WEREWOLF HORROR!!!!!"

"AND I JUST FOUND THE REMOOOOOOOOOTE!

"Oh dash it all Black, what is it?"

"I found the remote, I just thought you would like to know"

"Congrats Padfoot, really."

"OH WHAT HAVE I DONE TO DESERVRE THIS PUNISHMENT OF ALL PUNISHMENTS? I HAVE NEVER CHEATED ON A TEST? OR STOLEN? OR DONE ANYTHING WORTHY OF SUSH SUFERING!!!!!"

"AND, OH MY GOD, THEY CANCELLED HETTY WAINTHROP!!!!!"

"SIRIUS! WHAT NOW?"

"THOSE SCUM SUCKING WEASLES! THEY REPLACED HETTY WAINTHROP MYSTERIES WITH MRS. BRADLY MYSTERIES!"

"Oh the humanity, now Sirius, I am asking you, please, as a friend, could you please be quiet for a while, it is very hard work writing a musical!"

"Especially about something as dull as your life!" Sirius mumbled.

"What was that?"

"Nothing, mum!"

"Well, unless it included me" thought Sirius, as he began to actually enjoy Mrs. Bradley Mysteries as much as he did Hetty's. Why the heck is he writing a musical? He thought after hearing very badly sung operettas and off key piano "noise." Sirius and Remus were the best of friends, especially now, but even though he was an adult, one of Sirius's favorite past times can be summed up with one word.

Pranks. Or Prank would also work nicely or Prank-ee, well, you get the idea.

So, even though they were friends, he still couldn't help but get just a little pleasure out of pranking (or "messing with" would also work) his old, and even older with actions, beloved Remus. So walking rather loudly to the kitchen, Sirius poured himself a glass of milk.

"NO ONES, BETTER THAN HOGWARTS, NO ONE HAS QUITE AS MUCH KNOWLEDGE AS HOGWARTS, NO ONE TAKES BETTER CARE OF THEIR STUDENTS LIKE HOGWARTS!"

lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick

"GOOD GOD MAN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?, Are you, OH MY GOD, SIRIUS, ARE YOU LAPPING YOUR MILK?!?"

"Maybe" he replied with a wicked smile.

"That's it, I am out of here!" and Remus walked downstairs and slammed the door.

"Perfect!" thought Sirius, and he turned the his digital cable to the "Show Tunes" channel and began singing along with "Lily's Eyes" from "The Secret Garden."

(A/N) Ok, well, this is based on true events; really Hetty Wainthrop Mysteries was my favorite show, anyway, I shall give one of three prizes to whom ever will guess 2 out of the 3 musicals on which I spoofed. (clue:) one of them was actually mentioned, and no its was not "The Secret Garden" but that is relevant to where my name comes from, oh and extra points if you get that as well.