A/N: Sigh…redundancy is repetitive, as is telling my sad tale that I do not own, nor shall I ever call mine, any TMNT and their constituents that Eastman and Laird claim as theirs. This goes for any martial arts terms or names of katas that I have written into the body of this chapter. I am clueless about these matters, but it has yet to stop me from creating stories about bi-pedal turtles that aren't! I venture where angels fear to!!! MWAHAHA!
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CHAPTER 8 – I Just Can't Take it Anymore!
Despite the fact that I didn't even have one morsel of food, I was expected to clean up the dinner dishes. At first I thought it was mainly because I was the lone female in the group. But, it became quite apparent that gender had nothing to do with it. I was 'chaperoned' in the kitchen, shadowed by Raphael. It was his turn to make sure I didn't sneak food while I scooped the leftovers into storage containers before placing them into the refrigerator. It seemed that cleaning up from the meal was part of my punishment.
He watched me silently as I went about my chore. It was quite unsettling to have his eyes on me the entire time I was working with the food. The fact that he never even tried to engage in casual conversation made me feel like I was in prison and not in a home environment. I guess the Kira that I was suppose to be had also proven herself to not be trustworthy. It made me feel quite insecure.
Fortunately, my stomach had quit growling about the time everyone had finished eating, so I was thankful for that. My extreme hunger had abated as well, which was also a blessed relief. But, my dissatisfaction with everyone, despite my determination to get through this hell as best I could, was still going strong. However, I was smart enough to know that banging pots and pans or slamming cabinet doors would get me nothing but possibly another stint with watching everyone else eat. There wasn't any way I could go without breakfast the same way I did dinner. I knew that if I cooperated, by tomorrow this punition of theirs would be over. Hopefully I could start fresh and impress upon them my willingness to cooperate. One thing was certain, I was not going to be the same Kira they had grown to know and loath.
When I was done, the kitchen looked spotless. I don't know what was normally expected, but I think Raph was mildly impressed. He didn't say anything but when I inadvertently caught his gaze, it had softened just a little. Not much, but enough to where I could tell that he was pleased.
"Would it be all right if I had a glass of water?" I asked politely of him. I was thirsty plus I figured it might help to ward off future hunger pangs.
Raph nodded and then motioned me towards the sink. I rooted through a couple of upper cabinets before I finally found the one which stored the glasses. They, like the plates that were used at dinner, were a mish mash of styles and colors. I took a blue one, since that was my favorite color, and filled it to the brim from the faucet. I drank deeply. When I was done I washed that cup, as well, and replaced it back into its cupboard.
Raph allowed me to exit the room first, probably to make sure I didn't snatch up any of the fruit that was sitting in a bowl on the counter. Despite a little bruising, the apples looked quite inviting, as did the bananas. But, there wasn't any way I was going to upend whatever morsel of respect I had earned with Raph from my thorough cleaning of the kitchen. I could fast until morning; it was that important to me.
Entering into the living area, Father greeted me, "Kira, I want you to do a double set of katas in the dojo before we head out in an hour. Then, retrieve your weapon and pads, meeting me in here when you are done."
Okay, what in blazes was a 'kata'? However, with everyone sitting around relaxing and either reading or watching the television, I was intimidated into silence. There wasn't any way I was going to add to my woes by asking a question that, as far as they were concerned, didn't need asking. I could just imagine the disdainful looks I would earn from them if I did. I racked my brain to interpret what Father wanted me to do. The dojo was the fitness center, or work out room. Maybe, just maybe a kata was a workout routine? Possibly it was something to warm me up or to prepare me for my 'watch' that I would be going on with him? That must be it, I thought. Well, I did the gym back in my old life three times a week. I knew how to warm up so I decided that I would do what I was familiar with.
Without a word I headed for the corridor passed the others. I heard Mike mumble something about 'checking things', but I was so focused on following through with Father's instructions that I paid him little mind. Unknown to me, I was being followed.
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I stood in the large training room or dojo and looked over the various weapons. Some were quite beautiful – such as the staffs and swords – but there were the scythes shaped ones that put shivers down my spine.
"Good grief," I muttered under my breath, "What is that and what purpose would it serve?"
"Well," a voice boomed gently behind me, "it's called a Kusari-gama and originally it was used as a farming tool."
I was so startled I nearly shot up to the ceiling. I jumped around with one hand over my chest as if to keep my heart from dislodging itself and sucked in a breath so loud it echoed throughout the room.
"GOOD GOD, YOU NEARLY GAVE ME A HEART ATTACK!" I bellowed loudly.
"Kira, you must do better at knowing when you are being followed. Your blatant refusal to train has clearly made you inattentive!" Donatello declared teasingly.
It took a moment for me to regain some measure of control and I could tell that my 'shadow' was clearly amused by my surprise. His mouth was upturned ever so slightly. I was not in the least bit entertained by it, however.
Once I found my voice I asked, "Why are you here?"
"To make sure you stick to the task." He replied simply.
Great, just great. I hadn't any idea what a kata was and was so hoping that I could just do my usual gym warm-ups without anyone being the wiser. Now I had a witness that would more than likely know that I was clueless. What was I going to do now?
"Well, I much prefer doing my warm-ups privately." I said as a matter of fact.
"Is that so…" Donatello replied. One eye ridge was cocked up suspiciously. "Well, let's just call this a new experience, then, shall we? Why don't you begin with the first position." He suggested.
I was momentarily paralyzed. Position one in ballet was the only position phrasing that I knew. I had taken ballet all through elementary school and junior high. I had a pretty good feeling that placing my feet heel to heel with each foot facing away from the other in a straight line was not what Donatello had in mind. Therefore, I had three choices before me. I could go ahead and do what I understood to be 'position one' and then risk the ire of my 'overseer'. I could refuse to do anything at all and play stubborn, again earning the rebuke of said turtle. Or, I could just admit I haven't a clue what was expected of me and – well, it looked like catching it from Donatello was a done deal all the way around regardless of what I did. I was cornered.
Maybe it was my expression or that 'special sense' that they all seemed to have, but Don saw my contemplation.
"What's wrong, Kira - forgot how to do it?" he asked mockingly.
I had to hand it to him; his aim wasn't so far off. "As a matter of fact…" I began, but he cut me off.
"Do you take me for a fool?" he growled out.
Now there was a word…but not in a million years. "No, I don't, but I am counting on your intellect, though!" I tried not to grind out.
"You've been doing the advanced katas for the past six years. It's like second nature to you, when you decide to do them that is. How is it possible for you to all of a sudden forget how to?" Donatello chided me. Then, he brightened up, "Oh, that's right – you just arrived, didn't you? I forgot about that. Well, I guess I'll just have to walk you through them, now, won't I!"
At first I was relieved that Don was going to help me. But for some odd reason the tone he used and just the way he worded his intent told me that whatever he was going to be walking me through, it would be more like a marathon run!
"Ah, thanks – I guess…" was all I could muster.
"Okay, the first kata we'll do is the Bassai-sho. You do remember that one, don't you?" Don asked derisively as he prepared his stance.
I tried very hard not to give a blank stare, but I truly couldn't help it. "Okay, let's just put the cards on the table…I haven't a clue how to do a kata much less understand what it is…I'm sorry, I just can't continue this anymore…" I lamented sorrowfully. "As hard as it is for you to believe me, I really did just arrive. I've tried to cooperate today, I really have… but… I just can't…." and that's when I lost it completely.
Slumping to the carpeted floor I sat there and balled my eyes out. I hugged myself as I cried, my legs pulled up hard against me. I hid my face into my arms as I sobbed, resting onto the tops of my knees. I didn't care in that moment what Don was doing or what he was thinking…I just couldn't fake it anymore. Whatever martial arts I was supposed to know just didn't come with the package when I came into this existence. That was the final straw. I was at a complete loss.
Donatello stooped down in front of me and I could feel his eyes rack over my being. He put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed gently. Then, he said softly, "I didn't realize how deeply the death of your mother has affected you…Kira, I'm sorry!"
His compassionate ministrations were appreciated, but how could I tell him that he was so far off base it was almost funny. I had to be frank with him, "Let's get one thing straight, okay? I don't remember her! I couldn't even tell you what Mei Pei looked like! I thought an hour ago I could just – live this life for a while until my other one started up again – but, every time I think I can do it, something else comes along and…." I sniffed. "I don't know who this Kira is, but little by little I'm learning that I really don't want to be her!" I looked up at Donatello and saw that his expression had changed from compassionate to concern. But, I was on a roll, "I'm sorry….that your computer was damaged; I'm sorry about Raph's pink sais…" Okay, that was funny, it really was. No matter how much I tried to take that seriously, just seeing him twirling around a pair of pink sais nearly made me want to giggle out-loud. But, not right now; maybe latter, if there was one for me that is. "And Mike's CD's – sorry about that, too. Yet I don't remember ANY OF IT!" my voice rose just a little with the last few words.
Donatello sat down next to me and draped an arm across my heaving shoulders. I still had my head buried into my arms, crying and just feeling all around miserable. I continued my ranting, "And now, Leo – supposedly my father – thinks I'm ready to go on patrol or do a watch or something." I lifted my head and looked at Don, my face now streaked with tears, "How in blazes am I suppose to protect myself or even him if I haven't any idea how to?" I turned my face away and rested it on my arms, my knees for support. I shuddered in the after effects from my emoting.
What I heard next from him startled me, "Okay, Kira – the benefit of the doubt…." He paused a little, took a breath, and then offered, "Let's say for the sake of argument that you are right; you really did just arrive. If you are inhabiting Kira and she knows all about doing katas, martial arts, or ninjitsu….don't you think that maybe this body you now wear might be familiar enough with the moves to just do it?"
I turned my head back to face him, sniffing, "Wh- what do you mean?"
"Well, have you ever done something routine or familiar and found that you didn't really have to think about it; your body automatically just does it? Sort of like going on 'auto pilot'!" Don replied.
I remember many times while driving where I would be heading out to some place that was routine. I could be mentally hundreds if not thousands of miles away and in no time flat I would find myself at my destination. I would make all the necessary turns, stops, and freeway onramps without really being aware of it. I knew what Don was talking about but I didn't think it could pertain to my physical self. Driving a car and doing some martial arts kata were two different 'animals' all together.
"I – I don't know if will work with this, though." I sniffled.
"Well, nothing ventured, nothing gained…why don't we try it, okay?" and he stood up and offered his hand to me.
Knowing that there wasn't much else I could do but to accept, I took it and in a flash found myself pulled easily to a stand.
Don looked at me and smiled, saying, "Now, for the Bassai-sho, it means the lesser Bassai kata. This is a shorin kata created by Yasutsune Itosu. The main points are blocking strongly and counter-attacking sharply! Here, let me demonstrate."
I watched as Donatello went through the moves. I had to admire his fluidity and grace. He was really quite beautiful to watch the way he went through each element. He was not necessarily fast, but I didn't believe speed was the idea. Yet what I felt more of was a sense of acceptance from him, as if he made a point to meet me where I was rather than demand where I meet him. In that bit of clarity I felt a renewed sense of confidence. Maybe he was right; maybe I would be able to do what he said simply by remote. Certainly by watching, I hope! Though I truly didn't feel I could do it at his level, at least he was willing to let me try!
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A/N: The Bassai-sho kata was gleaned from off the net at: . I do not pretend to know martial arts. The Internet has been my guide for anything related to this topic. Video clips that have helped me to understand these maneuvers have also been gleaned off of the 'net at this address:
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GUMMADOON FANATIC: Thanks so much for reading and reviewing! I appreciate your enthusiasm a lot!! As you can see with this chapter, confusion just became more so. Thankfully, Donnie comes to her rescue.
RAMICA: Again, you have read and reviewed! You're so awesome! Yes, I couldn't resist the pink sais. I kept asking myself, 'What's the worse thing that could happen to Raph's sais aside from losing them?' Pink! Then, it went from there to Don and then Mike, and Leo….but I decided to not have Splinter be a target. I figured that he's the grandpa of the group and grandpas are always absolved of rebuttals! Yeah, Leo is all gung ho with getting everyone battle ready, but losing Mei Pei sort of rocked his foundation a little. We have a tendency to 'have no fear' until a child of ours tries the same stunt. Then, it's a whole different ballgame all together! I was originally going to do just a simple family dinner time, but then changed the dynamics of it to be a form of discipline for her late night outings! Though, the poor girl inhabiting Kira ( if that's what it is!! ) is completely dumbfounded by it. Yeah, it can suck when you have ninjitsu warriors raising you!
DANCINGFAE: Well, thanks for reading and reviewing once again!! What can I say…I couldn't resist painting Raph's sais. I laughed when I thought it up, too!! Yes, she certainly has her work cut out attempting to 'read' the clan to avoid any more pitfalls!
KUROI NEKO-KUN: Glad your reading and reviewing again! Thanks! Glad, too, that you like Kira. Hard to say what will happen in subsequent chapters. Needless to say, I know how it ends and I can't wait to get there. It'll be interesting to see how everyone reacts! Bwahahahaha!