Disclaimer: Don't own any turtles, whether bi-pedal and ninja or otherwise.  I only own Kira and the name Drial Namstae. 

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CHAPTER 18 – Found Out!

I stared at the screen, unable to take my eyes off of the words I had just read.  I thought if I kept reading them a different meaning would come to mind.  However, that was not the case.  No matter how many times I re-read that message from Drial Namstae, it told me the same disturbing news.  Difficult as it had been to accept being in the sewers, finding out that I was the real Kira just bumped the weirdness up to a whole new level.  I wanted to scream.  Yet I knew if I did, Don and the others would be bolting into the room to find out what was wrong.  Right now, I didn't want them to know anything about my discovery.  I had my reasons, too.

I had this strong impression that it would not have been permissible for me to go outside of the clan for help.  I was sure that if Father found out, granola bars would soon become my main diet.  The last thing they'd want would be to move again.  Consequently, they would feel my going to an outsider for help would endanger the clan once more.  I knew that Father would be quite angry with me, as would everyone else.  After what I just went through during the past twenty-four hours, I really didn't care for a repeat! 

Also by getting them involved with my situation, I would confirm to them that I was who they thought I was.  More than likely, they would step up my re-training!  Right now the way I was feeling I wanted to ease back into this life without anyone being the wiser.  Call it pride or whatever; I just felt that it was my problem.  The transition should be mine and mine alone.  Besides, what could any of them do about it?  It wasn't as if I could go up to the local pawnshop and purchase my old memories back.  If what Drial Namtsae said was true, then the memories of my life here in the sewers were gone forever from me and now belonged to 'someone else'. 

My concern now was for that 'someone else'.  Because of who I was previously before finding myself in the sewers, I knew without a doubt that my switch had been with Alicia Gordon.  How she figured it out was still a question that needed answering.  Nevertheless, she had obviously said something to someone here in this universe to reverse the incantation.  To whom she shared this fact with was a mystery, but Splinter did seem the obvious choice to me.  Unlike Father and the others, the rat availed himself willingly and appeared less hostile towards me.  More than likely, Alicia might have found him to be the same way with her as well. 

Nevertheless, I knew that regardless of whom she told Alicia had picked the worse possible time to fess up to her true self.  I knew now that she was either dead or, at the very least, injured and lying in a hospital.  It was all because of that stupid accident that, had I been paying attention, might have been prevented! 

I was so involved with thinking about my situation that I hadn't heard Donatello enter the room.  I had my arms wrapped around myself as I trembled a little from the effect of Drial's Email.  It wasn't until Don was standing right next to me that I noticed him. 

Startled, I tried to drop my Email account, but his hand quickly caught mine in a firm hold and held it above the mouse. Had I been just a little faster…?

"Kira, what exactly is being said here?" Don asked.  He was looking at my account.

Stammering and quite concerned, I replied tartly, trying to stand in front of the screen, "Is - isn't it kind of rude to read other people's mail?"

"Not when it's on my computer." Don declared, gently pushing me aside, "Who is this Drial Namtsae?  What does he mean by 'you will be a stranger in your own world?  From that point on there is no return?' "

I was losing my composure, now.  I did not want anyone to know about this until I could speak with Splinter.  "Please, Donatello, please don't say anything to Father!  I just discovered this, too." I cried, "I – I'm not sure what it means.  I need to speak with Splinter about it!"

"What do you mean you don't know what it means and how does this involve Splinter?" Don growled as he looked at me.  He then gently but effectively pulled me away from the computer.  Don then sat down in the chair I had occupied only moments before.  He began to read the entire message about the conditions for switching my life with the other willing participant – Alicia Gordon.  When he finished with that message, Don dropped it down and exposed the long string of other incoming Emails that Drial had sent me.

I cringed and backed up towards the far desk where only thirty minutes earlier I had finished my studies.  I watched as Don systematically went to each and every entry and opened it.  It didn't take him long to read through the entire history of my communication with Drial Namtsae.  Then, Don went to my outgoing mail that I had sent. 

"Why is this Drial Emailing you, Kira?  What does he want from you?"  He looked over at my slowly retreating form, scowling in concern at me. 

I hadn't even had a chance to check my own outgoing mail, yet.   I was mortified, to say the least.  What kind of defamatory remarks about the family might be in there?  Considering it was a personal Email account, I was sure I vented now and then.  So many times since I had arrived I had wanted a hole to crawl into.  All I wanted now was for the ground to open up and swallow me! 

I quivered from the pent up emotions and the shock of realizing the truth of who I was.  Don's intrusion hadn't helped, that was certain.  Tears streamed down my face unabated as my emotions became too overwhelming.  Don stared hard at me and then turned his focus to the computer screen. 

I watched him as I backed up against the desk.  I watched as Don opened each and every outgoing message from me.  I saw his eyes go wide at certain times, glancing at me once or twice in utter disbelief.  Then he became transfixed yet again as he read the progression of how I so willingly accepted the chance to change lives with a complete stranger.

I slumped to the floor, defeated.  Out of reflex, I wedged myself underneath the desk and scooted as far from the opening as I could.  I wanted to hide, to disappear, or to run away.   About the time I pulled my head into my shell and tried to do the same with my arms and leg, I heard the bedroom door open.

"Ah, Don?  What's going on in here?" It was Father!

I began to cry softly, truly afraid now that he was here.  I pulled deeper into my shell and huddled under the desk, terrified of what the outcome was going to be. 

Soon I heard the pad of softer feet enter the room.

"My sons, what is the matter?  I felt a great distress coming from this room!" Now Splinter was here.  Just great, could anything get any worse, I thought to myself.

"Hey…what's happen'n?  The stress levels in here are goin' off the charts!" 

Oh, just wonderful.  Now Raph decided to be apart of my merry little get-together.  Why weren't some of them out on patrol?  It was only a matter of time before….

"Yo, Dudes, where's the fire?" It was Mike. 

My entire family was now in what used to be Don's rather large bedroom.  With the five of them milling about, I was glad for my little space under the desk.

"Don, what is that?  Is – that Kira's Email account?" Father asked in a voice that expressed disbelief.

I heard Don mumble something and then there seemed to be an unusually long stretch of silence.  It didn't last for long.

"KIRA!  WHAT IN BLAZES HAVE YOU DONE?"  Father yelled. 

I tried to scoot farther back under the desk but the wall kept me from making any progress.  I was as far back as I could get.  If it were physically possible, I would have pulled my arms and legs into my shell and snap everything closed.  However, the mutation had changed much of what the original design of my species was supposed to be.  The best I could do was to hunker down inside my shell and ball up my arms and legs. 

"KIRA!  GET OUT FROM UNDER …" Father began to say, but then he quieted. 

I heard Splinter softly comment in Japanese and then Father, less respectfully than he did the last time he spoke to the rat, come back with a statement in the same language.  Splinter was a little more forceful this time with his return and less gentle, too.  There was a pregnant pause lasting almost a full minute.   Then Father finally replied, "Hai."  He didn't seem too happy and I couldn't rightly blame him.

Soon, I heard an assortment of soft steps, almost indiscernible, but I noticed them nonetheless.  Some time went by before I even attempted to stick my head up out of my shell.  It was then that I heard or rather felt a presence.  I sniffed and immediately knew that by the scent, it was Splinter.  I would recognize the perfume of his favorite incense anywhere!

"My child, you must come out from under there.  I don't think I can squeeze in; I am much too old for such gymnastics."  He said.  There was a bit of frivolity in his voice, as if he was trying very hard to not be threatening and thereby entice me to come out. 

"Ar- are they gone?" I asked, hiccupping a little from my crying. 

"For the moment they are.  We need to talk, you and I." Splinter said softly.

I peered out from under the desk and saw that Splinter was sitting on the edge of Donatello's bed.  He was neither smiling nor frowning, but he did see me.  "Come, Kira Siew, take a seat on the floor in front of me." He directed with his hands.

I slowly crawled out from under the desk, discovering that I, too, seemed too old for such stunts.  I was sore from forcing myself into a ball and my neck hurt from scrunching my head down into my shell.  Once I was free from the confines of the cubbyhole, though, the kinks easily worked themselves out.  By the time I was sitting in front of Splinter, I didn't ache anymore.  I was glad for the rug that lay there.  Where I had sat under the desk, the coolness of the concrete flooring had chilled me just a little.

"My child," Splinter began, glancing once at the computer screen and then back at me, "you have caused a great disturbance in the clan with this latest adventure of yours."  He now seemed genuinely sad.

Out of desperation I asked him, "Am – am I going to be banished?" The thought of it brought tears to my eyes, but I brushed them away.  For reasons that I could not explain, I didn't feel they would merit much attention from Splinter.

"No, no one will banish you, my dear.  You are too – special for our family!  Never would we do that." He said soothingly.  "But, you have violated yet another clan rule.  It will be dealt with in time, but for now, we must discuss Alicia!"

I looked up at him in surprise, "You – You know about her?" I asked softly, my eyes widening.

"Yes, I do." Splinter smiled.

"H - How?" I was astonished.  How could he know of Alicia?  Unless, somehow her memory had been restored while she was still here?

"Come with me to my room and I will tell you." The rat instructed.

"Can't you tell me here?" I asked nervously.  I was sure my family was waiting right outside that door; especially Father!

As if he read my mind, Splinter assured me, "No harm will come to you, Kira Siew.  I have taken responsibility of you for the time being."

"How long is that?" I was truly worried about any rebuttal from the others, especially one in particular.

"Long enough.  Now," he slipped off of the bed and stood up, offering his left paw to me, "Stand up and be kunoichi!" 

Splinter said the last word with such conviction that the only course for me was to follow and obey.  It wasn't the word he used, but the tone of his voice which gave the word an aura of respect and dignity.  I stood up; my hand entrenched in his.  I then followed him to the bedroom door.  Once the door was opened, he led me out.  I shrank back just a little when I saw Father in the hallway, leaning up against the wall, waiting.  Splinter's grip tightened around my hand to ensure my compliance.  Yet, despite Father's obvious displeasure with me, he did not interfere.  I noticed the others, too, were in the hallway and each of them had similar expressions like Father had.  I shied away from looking at them, my head lowered in chastisement.  I allowed Splinter to lead me down the hallway and into his room. 

His incense was going full tilt but in that moment, I welcomed it gladly by taking in a huge breath of relief!  For the moment, I was safe! For how long I did not know. 

What I did know was from this point on I would always associate Splinter's thick incense with the feeling of being protected. 

Right now, I had sanctuary from the wrath of the clan!

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IN THE CLOUD:  lol  Good golly, I've never had such a short review before, but one that had me laughing out loud!  Truly made me chuckle!  Thanks for reading and reviewing.  BTW, did you notice that I did the 'B' for the next story on TMNTFreaks?!  :0)

Be blessed.

LADY VENOM2:  Yeah, I'm sure I surprised everyone.  Heck, I was surprised!  BTW, if you do a 360, you end up in the same spot!  Just thought you'd like to know. :0)  Five times, eh?  Shoot….I was aiming for 8.  Oh well.  Glad you like the direction I'm taking.  Wish I knew where I was going, though….sigh…..

Thanks for reading and reviewing!  Be blessed.

KUROI NEKO-kun:  Yes, Kira seems to have exchanged lives.  Her world ended with the death of her mom.  More on that in the  next chapter!  I was going to have it in this one, but no matter how I did it, the story plodded along.  I changed the flavor just a bit for chapter 18.  I hope I can keep writing, too.   I was almost blindsided with writers block after 17!!!  Thanks for reading and reviewing!  Be blessed.

DANCEINGFAE:  Oh, I'm sorry; did I cause you grief?  Bwahahaha!!!  Sorry; I just love typing that!  LOL  Ah, next time, don't eat before you read, okay?  I can only imagine how hard it would be to clean out the keyboard.  Yuck!   Yesh, unexpected it was – even for me.  Ah, the joys of being manipulated by my own story!  Thanks for reading and reviewing!  Be blessed.

MELIKA:  Oh, you must not read while riding your horse, Melika.  Reins work far better than words, anyway – no pun intended!  Hmm… heavy stuff like heavy water??  That explosive, eh?  Well, gee, you should have seen that coming!  No?  Hmm…join the club; neither did I!  I had a totally different idea originally.  Then, chapter 17 happened and it completely sucked every ounce of creativity from me.  GASP...WHEEZE!  But, I took a weekend off to recoup my energies and here we have chapter 18!  Even that took several attempts before I had the 'formula' where I wanted it. I'm still trying to figure out where that is, but for now it's enough.  Thanks for reading and reviewing.  Be blessed!

JO DAWN: Glad you are liking Nightmare.  I am trying to write true to the title, but it's just so hard when my humor kicks in.  I'm attempting to keep to the task, though.  Ah, not sure what you mean about the 'names'???   Which one?  Hmm… Anyway, thanks for reading and reviewing ( and you are gonna get up another chappy of WTHW, right???).  Be blessed!

RAMICA;  Yeah, I liked the chapter title a lot!  J  Bizarre, nightmare, Twilight Zone-ish….yes indeedee, that's my goal.  Glad it read that way, too!  I'm hoping to do more intrigue, but it depends on my gray matter; it's being taxed big time lately.  Gee, I could go with the 'body snatchers' theme here, couldn't I.  Hmm..food for thought, me thinks.  Thanks for reading and reviewing.  Be blessed!

PRETENDER FANATIC:  You're giving out prizes?  What'd I win, what'd I win, huh, huh, huh?  *Jumps up and down excitedly*

Well, glad you're having a good time with this story.  Love confusing people; keeps them happy for some strange reason.  As far as Drial's face is concerned, I may reveal him later on – or, maybe not.  Thanks for the periodic table correction.  My hubby was a little miffed I didn't call and ask him.  When I checked the web that's what they called it – until I realized it was the name of their website and not the actual table! LOL  Thanks for reading and reviewing.  Be blessed!