The Wrong One
-By Nefhiriel
A/N: More confessions from the terribly disorganized author... I'm afraid I gave the wrong title for this chapter last time. As you can see, this is NOT "Innocence or Guilt". Sorry, but that won't be till the chapter after next: ) Apparently around here, A/N stands for "Apologetic note" LOL. I guess I'll just continue to bang my head against that wall. Imbecamiel says I'll have to find a new wall soon, as this one is showing signs of wear... Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter. Hope you don't mind the continual thudding noise too much..... THUMP, THUMP, THUMP... CRACK! Oops. (rubs forehead as she ponders the brand-new hole in the wall) I guess Imbecamiel was right...(grins sheepishly) Well, I'm off to find myself a new wall! Enjoy!
Reviewer responses at the end. See first chapter for disclaimers.
- Dedicated to Strider (not the ranger, my dog : ). A sweet little puppy who has grown on everyone's heart – even Mom's... -
Chapter 3: A Hard Reality
As comprehension of what Aragorn was telling them grew, so did their bewilderment. Surely Legolas hadn't hit him hard enough to even temporarily cause blindness.
"What do you mean?" Legolas asked in shocked disbelief.
"I mean I can't see!" Aragorn said, the slight edge of his tone not entirely concealing his panic. He forced his voice to become steady, "I don't know what happened I...I just can't see!"
Getting over the initial shock, Aragorn got to his feet with Legolas' aid.
"We must find Ada.(father)" Elladan said, grimly leading the way indoors.
Elrohir set off ahead to inform Lord Elrond of what had happened. Elladan and Legolas led Aragorn to the infirmary and had him sit down on one of the beds.
Legolas' horror had by now been replaced by a sense of overwhelming guilt.
I should have seen that something was wrong.
Reproachful thoughts and questions filled him.
I should have been more careful! What if I had paid more attention to the first signs Estel had shown? But what had they been signs of? What was wrong? What could possibly have brought this on? I didn't hit him hard enough to cause loss of sight—or did I?
He wished he could go back in time to before the fight. What he would give if only he could go back and do everything all over again!
There was an awkward silence as they waited, a silence that none of them were used to. Each of them was desperately trying to find the right thing to say. But what words were there to say at a time like this? The guilt was weighing down on Legolas's heart so much he thought that if he tried to speak... Even thinking about what he may have just done to his best friend brought tears to his eyes.
What if Estel is blind for life because of me?
The thought was too horrible.
Elladan was hardly any better. His overprotective nature combined with his habitual tendency to blame himself for anything that went wrong was eating away at his grief stricken heart. He couldn't imagine what life would be like if Estel was truly blind for life.
What if that look of hope and joy never reenters his eyes? What if that unique sparkle is gone forever?
His youngest brother had always been full of life, full of complete and genuine happiness. His career couldn't possibly be ended, cut off before it had ever seriously begun. Estel was a warrior against the dark spawn of Mordor, how could he go on now, never again to wield a sword or draw a bow? Estel—hope—the eternal optimist, could he win against a world of lonely darkness?
Elladan knew his brother well. He knew he would try.
But in the end can he win?
The nagging thought haunted him. He couldn't think about that now.
Estel will see, he has to!
He wouldn't let himself think about the other possibilities. For now he would have to be an optimist, he would have to be a supporting shoulder for his brother to lean on, and he would have to go on hoping even when darkness was blinding his brother. His heart bled from the gnawing doubt even as he did his best to convince himself that the damage couldn't be permanent.
Questions were all the three of them had at the moment. Questions continued to bombard them, but no answers came to relieve their worried minds.
Aragorn was also groping for the right words. The more he tried to think of something to say, the more the words seemed to stick in his throat. Fear was competing for his attention, threatening to overpower him. Fear of his own condition, fear of not even being able to tell the expressions on his companions faces, and most of all a fear of what his father's final verdict would be. This was a dream, he kept telling himself over and over, a dream. Any moment he would wake up and the veil would be lifted, this darkness couldn't actually be his vision, could it? The shades must be drawn, or maybe a storm was passing over, or... or maybe he was blind? His heart sunk, his denial of reality waning. There was no other explanation, no other excuse for him to go on pretending.
Once again the urge to say something welled up in him.
Elladan in particular must be feeling horrible, he thought. Aragorn knew well his older brother's self-condemning nature. Legolas, he thought, would look at things in a more sensible light. He would surely understand that none of this could in any way be his fault. Still, he knew his friend would be nearly as worried as he was himself and he wished with all his heart he had the right words to comfort them both.
Before any of them had the chance to organize their raging thoughts, they heard soft footfalls coming down the hallway.
Already Aragorn's other senses had become heightened, his hearing in particular. He heard the door open and two pairs of light, elven footsteps softly coming toward him. Elves can, of course, be noiseless if they wish to, and most of the time are, but this time the perpetrators of the noise obviously had more important things on their minds.
Aragorn felt a hand on his shoulder and sensed Elrond's presence.
"Ada?" he asked quietly.
"Yes ion-nín (my son), it is I, and Elrohir is with me as well." Elrond looked into the unseeing pair of silver eyes before him, "Close your eyes Estel, that's it. Now keep them closed for a minute." he felt Estel's head, looking carefully at the side of his head were Legolas had hit him. There wasn't so much as a bruise. "Relax for a moment, think of other things. Relax," Elrond repeated in a soft tone. "rest."
He felt the tenseness leave Aragorn as he continued to check him over, he massaged his shoulders and helped him lean his back against the wall. Legolas and the twins looked on in anxious anticipation.
"Slowly open your eyes again." the elf lord gently directed his son.
Doing as he was told, Aragorn opened his eyes. The look of disappointment and pain told plainly that there was no change. Elrond had held a small hope that this only a momentary laps into blindness, though after his close scrutiny he couldn't even see a cause for that.
"You don't appear to have a concussion," said Elrond. "Whatever happened though, I don't think it was Legolas's blow that caused it."
Elrohir looked at his father, "What do you mean?"
"Before going blind this morning, did anything unusual happen?" Elrond asked Estel, ignoring Elrohir's question for the moment.
"Like what?" Aragorn asked in confusion.
"I mean anything, anything out of the ordinary or unusual."
"Yes, I guess there was something strange." the silence encouraged him to go on, "I've been feeling strange all morning."
"When exactly did you start feeling this way?" Elrond pressed him.
"I don't know..."
"Yes you do ion-nín—think! Think hard!"
Aragorn wracked his brain, finally it came to him.
"It was just before breakfast. I had just sat down and I felt a sharp pain in my head, then just as suddenly as it began, it stopped. I passed it off as nothing more than the heat."
"Did the pain recur?"
"Yes, a number of times. Except it wasn't always just a headache, I kept feeling sick and dizzy, often at the same time."
Elrond frowned in deep thought. This wasn't a concussion or a common human sickness, it was something more. He couldn't put his finger on it, but there was some evil at work here. He had an idea of what it was, and he could only hope he was wrong.
"Estel, tell me everything you have done this morning, have you eaten or drunk anything that the rest of us have not?"
"At breakfast all the drinks were poured from the same pitchers," Aragorn replied, not fully understanding what Elrond was driving at, "and the same platters of food were served to all."
"Think back, there was nothing you had before breakfast?" Elrond asked intently.
Aragorn began to shake his head, but then he paused.
"Wait—I did have something to drink. Before breakfast Legolas and I were going up to see if Elladan and Elrohir were awake yet, and Moranuen met us on our way and told me that you wished to speak to me. I went and talked to you and then came back. In the hall I ran into Eglaer, carrying two glasses of lemonade. He said Celboril had sent them up for Elladan and Elrohir, and since I was going to see then anyways, I offered to take the drinks for him. You told me not to wake them if they were still asleep as they'd had a long night, but I was hoping they would be awake by then. I took the two glasses and went into Elladan's room, where Legolas was waiting for me." He hesitated, "They were both still asleep and, well, since the weather has been so hot and I knew the lemonade would spoil before they could drink it..."
"So you drank one glass?" asked Elrond, his intensity growing.
"I handed one glass to Legolas, and drank the other myself."
"Legolas," Elrond's voice held hidden alarm, "did you drink as well?"
"No. Just then the bell rang for breakfast, and I didn't have the time."
Elrond's expression eased somewhat but the concern he felt for his youngest son still radiated from him.
"What is it?" Elrohir asked.
"I'm not sure."
"But," Elladan prodded, "you do have a good idea."
Elrond smiled sadly. He did have an idea. His healer's instincts were screaming at him, and he knew what had to be wrong with Estel.
"Saew.(poison)" was all he said in explanation.
A million thoughts whirled through their heads. One in particular was on the tip of their tongues but they could hardly bring themselves to ask it: Was there an antidote?
They were all startled as a light and cheerful voice from the doorway clashed oddly with their anxious thoughts.
"Lord Elrond! I've finally found you. I've been wanting to ask you if -" Celboril broke off in bewilderment as Elladan jumped up to take the two glasses from his hands - one empty, the other full of lemonade. Elrond straitened from his crouched position to take the glasses from his son.
"You got these from Elladan's room?"
Ceboril nodded. Then, catching sight of Aragorn lying on the bed, he became worried.
"Is anything wrong hir-nín?(my lord)"
"I'm afraid there is." Ceboril opened his mouth but Elrond continued before he could say anything, "We can not talk of it now. Later my friend, I must hurry now, but I will explain when I can."
Ceboril nodded hesitantly and then left them. Elrond set the empty glass down on the counter, taking the full one, he held it up to the light. The room waited in tense silence as he smelled it. Elrond clenched his jaw.
"It is as I feared."
"Then it is poisoned?" Legolas asked.
"Yes. It's called Tarmal." Elrond handed the glass to Elladan, "Smell it. It has a sharp, sweet smell. Whoever put it in knew what he was doing, lemonade is the perfect candidate to hide this kind of poison. Unless you know poisons well, Tarmal could easily escape detection mixed with something that smells so similar. When you first put Tarmal into liquid you can't smell it or taste it at all. Obviously the person who did this was expecting it to be drunk before it was in the glass for more than an hour. After an hour, especially when the liquid becomes warm, it begins to smell. The taste may be a little strange as well. I've seen it's effect on elves, but not on humans." he sighed, "I never expected Estel to be the one I saw the results on."
"You say that you have seen it's effect on elves? Is there an antidote?"
"I have, and there is. Tarmal would kill an elf within minutes unless the antidote was given right away. I don't exactly know how it affects humans, but I'm not about to wait and find out. Thankfully, the antidote is not terribly difficult to make. I will have it ready in a few minutes."
Turning his back on them, Elrond had already begun to mix the herbs for the antidote as he spoke. Legolas and the twins sat down to wait. Abruptly Aragorn gasped and clutched his stomach. All three of them were back on their feet in an instant, helping him to lay down.
"Hurry Ada!" Elrohir called, watching helplessly as his brother's face contorted in pain.
Elrond quickly ground a few more herbs and added them to the mixture. Picking up the glass, he walked to the side of the bed as the three younger elves made room for him. He lifted Aragorn's head and let the liquid glide down his throat. It took a minute, but soon the furrows of pain on Aragorn's face smoothed out. Taking his hand away from his chest, Aragorn opened his eyes. Elladan leaned over him searching the silver eyes nervously for any signs of recognition.
"Elladan?" Aragorn asked weakly.
Elladan almost cried from relief.
"You can see me?!"
Aragorn moaned and attempted to sit up.
"No, I can't see you. I just somehow... I don't know! I just felt it was you." he smiled faintly, "Please El, you're sitting on my arm."
Elladan shifted his weight quickly, flushing with embarrassment.
"Come you three," Elrond motioned them from their seats, "it's time Estel had his tea, he needs to rest."
"Shall I stay to get him to take it?" Legolas inquired helpfully.
"Don't worry mellon-nín, I'll take it without your help." Aragorn called from the bed,. "I know your methods." just as Elrond opened his mouth to banish them Aragorn continued, "But please Ada, let them stay." Elrond nodded and started to prepare the tea, sprinkling a generous amount of sleep inducing herbs into a steaming cup of water. True to his word, Aragorn drank it down without a fuss and soon was fast asleep.
"Will he ever see again, Ada?" Elrohir asked in a whisper.
"I have no way to tell whether the damage is permanent or not. We must pray hard to Ilúlvatar that it is not." the three younger elves looked down at the floor, "Do not give in to despair. All is not as lost as it seems. If there is a way to restore his sight I will find it."
Looking down at the form of the sleeping ranger, Elrond made a promise to his sleeping son—and to himself.
Even if I have to search all a Middle Earth and Valinor, I will find a way to heal you.
He lifted up a silent prayer to Ilúlvatar. Now, if only he could fulfill that promise.
-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-
A figure hovered outside the doorway, watching every movement within. As the human's eyes closed in sleep and the other elves settled into their chairs the figure stealthily moved backwards away from the door. He glanced nervously around as he crept back down the hall, black cape flowing behind him.
To Be Continued...
Ah, yes, the mystery lurker makes a second appearance... And we still don't know who he (or she) is: ) You'll be finding out pretty soon, though not in the next chapter, I'm afraid. The next chapter is titled "Pain and Remorse". Yes. It really is. I'm sure. I checked. Several times. Hehe, if I'm really careful, I may be able to spare my head lots of pain in the upcoming chapter. Maybe. Knowing me, it's not likely, but we can always hope, right?
Reviewer responses:
Drylith: I'm so sorry I missed you on the last chapter! Your review must have come in just after I posted. But thanks for the kind words! I hope this chapter helped keep your stress level down... But then, cliffies don't tend to help with stress, do they? (grins) This one wasn't TOO bad, but I'm afraid the next chapter is worse, I think, as far as stress goes : ) Sorry about that. OK, not too sorry (grins evilly). Hope to see you there!
twilight-la-fae: Actually...I AM a nerve-wracked computer ghost : ) My friend, Polingly, and I were talking about our upcoming stories, and sympathizing with each other. We both get "first post jitters", and are always terrified about what people will think. We were joking about how we haunted our computers after each post, hoping for some kind reviewer to come along and put some of our fears to rest. Thus was born the SNWCG. At the moment we are the only two members.... but hey, since we started it, she gets to be President, and I'm Vice President, LOL. Kinda cool : ) I can certainly sympathize with you about your muse! I'm ALWAYS getting ideas (at the moment I have about thirteen plot bunnies chasing me), I usually end up writing one chapter, and then suddenly I can't write anymore without great effort – it's so frustrating! I finally forced myself to stick with this plot, and now I'm just working on the very end of it (jumps up and down). Yep, poor Aragorn... I'm terribly cruel to him in this story ; ) And the suspense just gets worse (grins wickedly and reaches for the volume). Anyhow, thank you so much for putting me on your alerts! As a fellow-author, I'm sure you know already that it made my day : ) Now I've got to drag myself away from our delightful little conversation and work on the Epilogue : b
Bill the Pony2: I'm sooo happy to hear that you like my story! I hope you liked this chapter too : ) Thanks for reviewing – it means a lot to me!
sielge: Yep, poor Aragorn... This is not the last time I'll be saying that in this story : ) Glad you liked the chapter, and thank you so much for the review!
springfairy: I'm so glad you like my writing style, and the interaction between Aragorn and Legolas! I'm also glad to see that I'm keeping you excited and wanting more – that is, of course, the goal of every author. Hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as the last!
jacquelinestel: You are TOO funny! Now I have my very own JE reviews to brighten up my day with a little humor : ) Oh, I can hardly stop laughing! (giggles) That line about Legolas being : "a rare and unusual mix of Sindar and diminutive, dyslexic, green Jedi." that just cracked me up, LOL. My sister and I now have a new JE quote to go around repeating: "Perish the thought." "Can thoughts die?" "Only when I tell them to." (grins). Another brilliant line from Legolas, and an equally...um...dense line from my favorite ranger : ) Ah, it was fun to have the twins for while, too bad they had to leave so quickly, LOL. Awww, poor Legolas... Sand in his hair, now he'll have to wash it. I have past waist-length hair, so I know what a bother that can be : ) My hair takes about five hours to dry : b And, of course, we can't forget poor Estel with sand in his boots : ) Don't worry about not being able to post stories quickly, a lot of people have trouble with that. At least YOU are a wonderful reviewer : ) Actually, I knew I wouldn't be able to get up new chapters quickly either, that's why I decided to finish it before I started posting. It can be REALLY hard to keep writing for such a long time without the encouragment of reivews! But in the end it makes it less painful for everyone, LOL."Authentic" is not a common adjective used to describe cliffies, but I'm glad you like them, because most of my chapters in this story end in cliff-hangers. I hope "authentic" is still your word of choice by the end of this story (grins). Oh, I'm so relieved that you don't think I was too pushy. It certainly was NEVER my intention! Thanks so much for the fun review! And have a nice time in...um... "Hawaii" : )
Isadora2: Thank you, thank you, thank you! It was wonderful to get such an encouraging review from you! Glad this post was soon enough for you : ) I LOVE dialogue, so I'm really glad that you think it sounds good. I realize (and have realized for some time) that I am not Tolkien, and am never likely to write like him. So I've tried very hard to avoid the "teenage girl making pitiful attempts to write Shakespearian English and sounding terribly strained" syndrome. But I've also tried to avoid using modern words or phrases (something which I've found terribly distracting in my own reading), and have found, sort of, a middle ground. Wow! I really never would have guessed that English wasn't your first language! You write it much better than most native English speakers, in my opinion : ) Yes, Aragorn and Legolas ARE cooperating well with me, and staying IN character thus far. I hope they will continue to do so for the rest of the story ; ) Good, I'm glad you think the story is interesting too. Imbecamiel and I spent many hours discussing the plot. I let my imagination fly, and she made sure it stayed within the realms of logic, LOL. I'm glad you like what I've done with the POV. It will be switching around a little more later on in the story, but I've tried to stick with one POV within a scene. (blushes bright red) You think I'm mature? It seemed to me the only appropriate response when people were only trying to help me express myself better and avoid offending others. Of course it's always hard for anyone to heare that they've done something wrong, but becoming defensive or getting mad at the people helping you never solved any problem : )As one of our church leaders said only last Sunday, things like this "can either be a mistake, or an opportunity for growth". At least by choosing to grow, I can prove to people right from the first that I really am serious when I say that I want constructive criticism : ) Anyways, I'm glad you think I responded well. And I really wasn't offended at all by your referring to my age. Actually, it's quite reassuring for me to remember that I have plenty of time to gain writing experience, and I don't need to expect myself to write like Cassia and Sio right from the start : ) And I don't think you're a "grumpy European" at all. I think you're very helpful. Thank you SOOOO much for saying such kind things!
Mornflower: Heehee, I want to see your dad's reaction too! This might be interesting if you don't get used to cliffies soon, I've worked hard, and finally managed to end almost every chapter in this story on a cliffie. I may yet get see your dad's reaction to you running around in circles, clucking like a chicken, LOL. I love your dialogues between Aragorn and Legolas (I often read your reviews for Linuvial Greenleaf, and laughed a lot : ) I'm just ecstatic to see so many reviews that I have seen (and read) from LG's stories! I hope this post is soon enough to save your sanity. Though, if this is a sane Mornflower, an insane one might be REALLY fun to watch (grins). BTW, pretty name : )
viggomaniac: Oh, I've been doing more than "hinting" about making Aragorn's life miserable, I've been down right stating it as fact! Yes, that is one spoiler I'll give you : ) Great to know I've picked up an "Aragorn angst lover". I really would NEVER have guessed from looking at your name...LOL. A demented reviewer – YES! I LOVE demented people! In fact, I have been referred to as demented myself, on a occasion or two...or three... Can't imagine why, though : ) Yes, I'll definitely be drawing this out long enough for all to enjoy it. That is, if you call 24 chapters plus Epilogue "drawing it out". As for who you should suspect and whether or not people are going to play major parts... Do you really expect me to tell you all that? No? I thought as much... : ) I'm glad you like blind Estel, though I doubt he's enjoying it much. And being the evil author that I am, he'll be enjoying it even less soon (evil laughter). Thank you VERY, VERY much for pointing out the spelling mistakes I made! I'm afraid that I won't be able to correct this story as I go along, but I'll certainly keep them in mind for future chapters. Now... I'll just be off to kill my editor – wait! If I did that, it would be rather difficult for her finish editing the rest of this story, wouldn't it...Rather : ) Besides, since she is my sister, my parents might jump to the rather ridiculous conclusion that writing fanfiction is not good for sibling relationships. Parents tend to be kind of strange that way...LOL. Thank you so very, very much for reviewing!
Cassia: Well, you found out somewhat more of what's happening in this chapter, though I'm afraid I've raised about as many questions as I answered : ) I DID after all learn to write cliffies from reading YOUR stories – so it's all your fault, you see (grins innocently). Oh, don't worry at all about not being able to review every chapter. I know how busy you are, so I'll be happy with whatever you have time for : ) Just knowing you're reading my story is very encouraging. Besides, I couldn't possibly have my story be taking precious time away from your work on DBD! My sister would kill me, as would all your other fans I'm sure, if they could find me, LOL. I'm rather fond of life at the moment...
Naesse: You definitely come to the right place for tons of Aragorn! My favorite kind of fanfiction, both to read an to write, includes LOTS of Aragorn angst. So you'll get your fill : ) I'll try very hard to update frequently, so you waiting too long. Thank you sooo much for your review! I hope you enjoyed this chapter!
Cookie: I hope this update was soon enough for you : ) Thank you SO much for the kind words. I have worked very hard to keep all of them in character, and they seem to have cooperated very nicely - so far, at least : ) Thank you so much for taking the time to review, I REALLY appreciate it!
Opaleye: Actually, most of these beginning chapters are shorter than my later chapters, but I'm glad that it SEEMED long to you : ) I was kind of agonizing over how short some of my chapters were, so I'm relived that you didn't find it too disappointing! I'm glad you like my style too, and that the way I did the poison seemed natural to you. Thanks so much for reviewing! I'm afraid that if this keeps up much longer, I'll become an incurable addict. Ah, who do I think I'm kidding – I already AM addicted to reviews! Thanks again, you are such and encouragement : )
Patty: Well, I do have two siblings... I don't know how it is everywhere, but around here it's not altogether unknown for two to gang up on one (grins). All in good fun, of course : ) And we all three frequently gang up on my dad, too! Though, now that we've got older, and can beat him, he doesn't take us all on quite so frequently : ) Besides, who said that they have to follow all the common rules of sibling relationships? In my opionion, none of them have ever been quite what I would call "common" : ) But I can see how it could difficult for someone who has never had siblings to comprehend how three against one in a scuffle could be considered "all in good fun" , LOL. As for Legolas' feeling guilty... That is exactly the train of thought that my mind took, as you will see in upcoming chapters. I just couldn't pass up the chance to make Legolas feel horrible about something that was no fault of his own! (grins wickedly) Yes, I do know that I'm a nasty author : ) But that is one of the requirments for writning good angst fiction - isn't it? Yes, I'm sure it must be! (grabs "Official Angst Writers' Manual' and start flipping through) Ah, here it is, page #985,673,713: "...therefore we have deemed it nessesary to require that all good angst writers must be evil, malicious, nasty..."(drones on) Does anyone actually read all this? Anyways, I know I'm rambling : b Sorry... Thanks so very, very, VERY, much for reviewing - and I have every intention of keeping the cliffies coming : )
A special thanks to: twilight-la-fae, Hanyou-demoness, Deana, Lady Leeanne, jaquelinestel, Mornflower, Kathira, xinnia, and viggomaniac, for adding me to their author alerts! Thanks also to: polingly, Lord Elrond of Hogwarts, and secondstar2theright, for adding me earlier to your author alerts before I even started this story. I'm sorry I didn't thank you earlier. Me and my forgetfulness : b
Once more you all overwhelmed me with your WONDERFUL reviews! Thank you all so much! I hope to have the next chapter out on Friday or Saturday.
- Nefhiriel
Vice President and co-founder of the SNWCG