note: this is my first song fic and it just came to mind. any kind of reveiw is welcome so plaese enjoy!!
I can't stand to fly I'm not that naive I'm just out to find The better part of me
How could you tell me such things? How could you tell me you love me? How could you ask me if I loved you too? I thought you knew me better than that! These thoughts flow through my mind as I speed away into the night. How could you or any one else for that matter love me? I know of your past. Know how you always get what you want. Well I'm not like them. I won't fall for your looks and your cunning. You nor anyone else is going to bring this fire demons walls down! I stop in a park. Up in the tree I sit wondering how anyone could love a forbiden child like me...
I'm more than a bird...i'm more than a plane More than some pretty face beside a train It's not easy to be me
As I watch you go I wonder if I shall ever see you again. I knew I shouldn't have told you how I felt but I couldn't hold it inside any longer! You seem to think me just another preety face out to fill my desires and then be gone with you. Surely you know well enough by now to know I would never do that to you. Perhapes the yoko would have done such things and while he is a part of me he has also changed. I watch the window for a moment more before I lay down on my bed and cry. My mother comes in haveing heard my sobs and asks if I'm ok. I tell her I'm fine and to leave me alone. I see her hurt look at my harsh words and turn away. I feel hurt and angry at you, at me, at the world.
Wish that I could cry Fall upon my knees Find a way to lie About a home I'll never see
I reach for my katana only to relize that in my haste I left it at your place. Shit I think I'll have to go back and retrive it. SLowly I make my back to your still open window. As I step inside I see your mothers hurt look as she closes your door. You're on your bed crying as though you truely cared about me.. For just a breif moment I'm tempted to tell you it's ok but instead I turn away grab my blade and am gone into the dark cold night once again. Mixed emotions are running through me and I don't like it one bit. So I do the only thing I can. I start cutting down the trees in the park so as to take my mind off of you..
It may sound absurd...but don't be naive Even heroes have the right to bleed I may be disturbed...but won't you concede Even heroes have the right to dream It's not easy to be me
For just a moment I think I sense your ki but by the time I turn and look your gone again. Why do you have to be so stuborn? So hatefull? I know you have been hurt before but that doen't give you the right to hurt others. I thought we were good friends. I thought you trusted me. I see I was wrong. Unable to sleep I slowly get up to go fo a walk. All because others have hurt you doesn't mean everyone is out to get you. I slowly enter the near by park with out a second thought. Sitting on the swing it takes me a moment to relize something isn't right here. Thats when I see it. Most of the tree's are laying on the ground. No one but you could cause so much damage in such little time I muse. You must have sensed me comeing and run off for you left some trees still standing. When will you learn not everyone hates you?
Up, up and away...away from me It's all right...you can all sleep sound tonight I'm not crazy...or anything...
I almost hadn't sensed you comeing as I had been so busy with the trees. I know it won't take you long to figure out I was here. Sure enough I'm right. I watch as you smile sadly at some thought. Whats so funny? I wonder. Perhapes you think it's amuseing that you could stir up such emotions in me.. "well it's not!" I want to shout at you. I've never had such mixed emotions about anything before and I don't know how to handle it. One things for sure. I'm still your friend and comrade and aside from a broken heart I won't let anything happen to you..
I can't stand to fly I'm not that naive Men weren't meant to ride With clouds between their knees
I knew you were still here for you forgot to hide your Ki as you watch me so. Some part of me finds this amuseing though I don't know why. I wonder what you are thinking as you watch me.. I let the tears fall freely from my eyes so you can see just how much pain you've caused me. I should have known you wouldn't accept my love.. Slowly I walk over to the once wooded area that contains a lake. I undress and step into the cool water planing to drown my sorrows for good.. If I can't have you than whats the point in staying on this earth. Once I die here I can go back to being the ruthless heartless yoko I was before.
I'm only a man in a silly red sheet Digging for kryptonite on this one way street Only a man in a funny red sheet Looking for special things inside of me Inside of me Inside me Yeah, inside me Inside of me
I watch you stuned as you step into the water. Don't you relize just how cold it is out here? Are trying to get your self killed?! your mere human body can't handle extreme cold like that. I know you once tried to explain it to me. I didn't understand it.. Just like I don't understand now.. I know life on this planet isn't the greatest but it's ok so long as you have friends who care about you.. It was then that I relized it. You thought I hated you! You were planing on ending your life and all because I didn't love you. I always thought you were the smart one, so how could you do something so dumb? How is it possible for the smartest one I know to also be the dumbest? Times almost up I relize before you human body freezes to death.
I'm only a man In a funny red sheet I'm only a man Looking for a dream
I can't see you but I know your here. Here watching me. the water is fridged but I swim underneith it anyways. It's not nearly as cold as your heart. My body is slowing down and I can barely move now due to the extreme cold. I don't care. You'll be happier when I'm out of your life. I come up for one last breath of air before going under..
I'm only a man In a funny red sheet And it's not easy, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm.
I know if I don't do something right now you'll die. I see how stiffly you move in the water. Your body is slowly freezing. I'm so busy watching you I don't notice the tear that trickles down my cheek and lands as a black gem on the swing below me. I can't stand it any more! quickly I jump from the tree and rush into the frigid water. It takes me preciouse seconds to locate you. I grab your now unmoveing body and pull you from the water. Was I too late? Were you...? No! I wouldn't think about that right now. Now more tears were falling yet I didn't notice. I was too worried about getting you to your bedroom and keeping you warm. I lay you on your bed and close you window. I raise my body temp in order to warm up your room faster. Still your not moveing.. Walking over I listen to your chest. your heart is beating but just barely.. I quickly transfer some of my life energy over to you. It's then I notice my black tear gems all over your floor. I scoop them up. As I wait nervously for you to wake I began to make a necklace with the black gems. Something I'd seen my sister do once. I relized then that I don't like you as just a friend. No there's a new feeling inside of me. What it is I'm not exactly sure but i've never felt anything like it before. It's so warm so HAPPY. Is this the strang thing you call love? I don't have time to think on it more. You roll over in bed and slowly open your eyes..
Its not easy to be me
I'd heard you moveing about in my room. You were paceing. Something I can't stand. Slowly I roll over and look at you. I feel exausted and weak. You give me a half hearted smile and quickly turn away. You don't turn quick enough for me to miss the guilt and hurt in your eyes. I relize then that you blame yourself for my antics tonight. "Hiei" I say. "Don't blame your self. It was my fault I should have never told you how I felt. Though I don't deny that I will never stop loveing you." at my words you turn slowly Something in your hand but I can't tell what. Your head is down in what I take as shame. You press the object into my hand. I see it's a necklace made with the preetist black gems.. Tear gems I relize. You look up then and I see it wasn't shame but embarresment in which you hung your head. I smile warmly and open my arms. "I'm sorry" I whisper.. You rush into my open arms and I hug you. "I'm sorry too.." you whisper. "I almost killed you. What would I have done then? Who would have had enough heart to love a forbiden child?" He hugs me back and a feel a few more tears fall. Wether they are mine or his I don't know because his next words suprise me. "I love you too" he tells me. We stay like that for a few minutes more. In each others arms. Slowly he pulls away. "Get some sleep" he tells me. I obey knowing that he will still be here when I awake.