Disclaimer: Nope, don't own DBZ.

It was a rather quiet day in the Son home, for once everyone was just relaxing. Kuririn had come over earlier in the day and was sitting across from Goku as he drank his coffee.

"Hmm, I got a package today," Kuririn said while taking a sip.

"Oh yeah? What was it?" Goku asked.

"It was a clock. But when I first got it, I thought it was a bomb, I'm pretty sure you know how that went," Kuririn sighed.

"You ruined it?"

"Yep, it was a gift from someone, but I thought it was a bomb, it just kept ticking at me..." Kuririn frowned.

"Why didn't you just open it?" Goku asked.

"I was going to at first, but the ticking was worrying me, so I threw it out into the ocean and destroyed it," Kuririn scratched his head.

"Oh," Goku chuckled.

xxx

At that moment, Mr. Satan also received a package.

And it was not a clock.

xxx

"So, I'm thinking about getting a nose," Kuririn said after a moment.

"Why would you want a nose?" Goku said.

"I'm just considering it right now, but I think I could really use one," Kuririn murmured.

"C'mon, having a nose isn't all it's cracked up to be," Goku responded.

"Oh really?"

"Yeah, you've got to keep it clean, and you've got to blow it all the time whenever you have a cold. And it's just one more place for your enemies to hit you," Goku explained.

"I still think it's better than having no nose at all, it's a pain always having to breathe out of my mouth like this," Kuririn frowned.

"I've never seen you breathe out of your mouth," Goku said, blinking.

"Of course I breathe out of my mouth Goku, I'm obviously not breathing out of my a-"

"Kuririn! Don't curse! Gohan might hear you!" Chichi shouted as she suddenly appeared, like magic. "I don't need my little boy, and Gohan, running around swearing like sailors because they heard you cursing."

"Whoops, sorry Chichi," Kuririn rubbed his neck in embarrassment, while Goku scratched his head in confusion at the "little boy" thing.

"You'd better be, and don't make me come back in here," Chichi threatened as she went to go check on Gohan.

"Anyway, I think I'd look pretty good with a nose, too," Kuririn steered them back on topic.

"Hmm..." Goku scratched his chin.

"What? Come on, just picture it, me with a nose," Kuririn said.

"Hmm..."

"I'd look like a stud, right?" Kuririn smirked.

"Nope... I just can't see it," Goku frowned.

"Well, I think I'd look like Yamcha, once I get my hair too," Kuririn said.

"Yamcha eh? I guess I could see that, if you got rid of the dots and became taller," Goku rubbed his chin.

"How do you think Yamcha would look without a nose?" Kuririn said suddenly.

Goku smiled at the though of a noseless Yamcha. "Do you mean after someone just violently ripped it off, or just him with no nose period?"

"I think I'd prefer it if someone ripped it off," Kuririn snickered.

"So wrong," Goku shook his head, but laughed anyway.

xxx

Yamcha sneezed suddenly.

"I'd better be coming down with a cold, because if there's someone out there insulting me, I'm gonna have to get rough with them," Yamcha smacked a fist into his palm.

His mouth twitched.

He then slowly cracked a smile.

"Argh! Not even I can take my threats seriously!" he smashed the table he was sitting at and sulked away.

xxx

Vegeta was in the kitchen eating a few dozen sandwiches at Capsule Corp, when Goku and Kuririn walked in and greeted him.

"Hey Vegeta," Goku waved as he sat down across from the short Saiyan.

"What do you want?" said Saiyan asked.

"We just came by to hang out," Goku smiled.

"Hang what out?" Vegeta muttered.

"Nothing. Hey, do you ever use the internet?" Goku asked him.

"How do you know what the internet is, Goku?" Kuririn asked him.

"Gohan showed me the other day, it's awesome. I was up all night 'surfing'," Goku said.

"You can read though?" Kuririn said before he could stop himself.

"What was that?" Goku said quickly.

"Uh, nothing, nothing at all," Kuririn laughed fearfully.

"Even if I knew what you two buffoons were talking about, I would rather kiss Furiiza's feet than talk about it with you," Vegeta snapped after finishing another sandwich.

"What, are you still upset about yesterday? I said I was sorry," Goku scratched his head.

"It was completely revolting Kakarotto, you're lucky I didn't kill you on the spot," Vegeta was starting to get angry again.

"But it was an accident, and besides, you did try to kill me," Goku chuckled nervously.

"No one sneezes in my face!" Vegeta bellowed, spraying food bits on Goku and Kuririn.

xxx

Elsewhere. In the mountains.

Tien broke wind long and hard.

xxx

"Aheheh... I guess I shouldn't have put so much pepper on my fries, huh?" Goku rubbed his neck.

"I agree with Vegeta. It was pretty gross Goku, I mean, there was snot everywhere, especially all over Vegeta, AND he was eating. Bleh" Kuririn added.

"I said I was sorry. And I thought I could turn around before I sneezed," Goku muttered.

"Get out of my kitchen," Vegeta growled.

"But Vegeta, this is Bulma's kitchen," Goku responded.

"Shut up, and get out before I kill you," Vegeta warned.

"Fine, I'll go. But I'm taking some sandwiches with me," Goku declared.

Vegeta wrapped his arms around his little sandwich pile and powered up.

"Okay, okay, jeez. It's not like you can't make more..." Goku left the room dejectedly.

"Well, Vegeta, it's just you and me now," Kuririn took a sip of his coffee, that he had made when no one was looking.

"Why are you still here? When I said 'get out' I was referring to the both of you," Vegeta said.

"I'm still drinking my coffee," the bald warrior said.

"Finish it quickly then. I'd just kick you out, but the woman is always nagging about leaving stuff open in the kitchen and wasting beverages," Vegeta snorted.

"Attracting ants?" Kuririn questioned.

"None of your business Baldy," Vegeta snapped, before squishing an ant with his finger.

"So... When was the last time you used a comb, Vegeta?" Kuririn snickered.

"What's a comb?" Vegeta said in bemusement.

Kuririn quietly fell out of his seat. He figured that Vegeta would say that.

Just then, Goku suddenly ran back into the room and grabbed a few sandwiches.

"I said I was taking some sandwiches and I meant it!" Goku shouted and ran out before Vegeta could do anything.

"..."

xxx

The two former students of the Turtle Hermit, were at Goku's house again the next day.

Kuririn sighed loudly as he read the newspaper.

"What's wrong Kuririn?" Goku asked.

"Well, I'm reading the paper here, and they're saying that Mr. Satan exploded yesterday," Kuririn answered.

"Who's that?" Goku said.

"The 'World Martial Arts Champion', he came onto the scene after we all stopped entering tournaments," Kuririn informed him.

"Oh. You said he exploded? How?" Goku wondered.

"I think his head got so big from all of his illusions of grandeur that it just went up in flames with a bang," Kuririn said dryly.

"Oh, really?" Goku blinked.

"No. It says here that he received a package that blew up when he opened it," Kuririn answered.

"Wow, that sucks," Goku said after a moment.

"It really makes you wonder if using the dragonballs so much to bring people back is really worth it. I mean, they're just gonna wind up exploding eventually, just like Mr. Satan," Kuririn sighed.

"Yeah. So, when are you going to grow some hair?" Goku asked.

"I'm not sure. I think I'll try the nose first, and see how that works out," Kuririn shrugged.

"How would you go about getting a nose anyway?" the Saiyan questioned.

"Well, I was going to use the dragonballs," the ex-monk said.

"That's kind of a selfish wish though, I'm just saying," Goku responded.

"Don't worry about it Goku. It's not like the world's gonna be destroyed in the future, or seven evil dragons will be created from the dragonballs because of one tiny, selfish wish," Kuririn laughed.

"Well... All right. You should hold off on the wish though for now, see if you really want a nose that bad," Goku replied.

"It's hard though. With all you "Nosies" walking around, flaunting your noses at me all day, I've about had enough," Kuririn frowned.

"Uh, yeah," Goku scratched his head.

xxx

That night, Gohan most likely died because he'd apparently been in his room for two days straight with no food. Whoops.

xxx

Notes: So... I was trying to sleep last night at three in the morning, but instead I was just thinking about stupid conversations the DBZ characters could have. So blame this oneshot on sleep deprivation, ok? It'll be our secret.