Author: Ponderer

Title: He's Always Been Snarky

Rating: PG13 (just in case)

Category: Romance

Summary: Back to you, it always comes around. Back to you, I tried to forget you, I tried to stay away. But, it's too late. He's always known you'd come back. He's always been snarky.

Disclaimer: I don't own the HP characters or the song from the lovely and talented J.K. or John Mayer. So, don't sue.


I'm so good at forgetting. Well, at least that's what you think. You used to hold grudges. Especially back in school when he was around. He was rude and snarky and just plain horrible to you. And you hated him, more than you thought possible. But, then it changed, didn't it? He still was rude and snarky and just plain horrible, and you still thought you hated him, but you didn't. You were starting to… like him. And that made you hate him even more, because sooner than you'd liked, he found out. But, he wasn't rude about it, not even a bit snarky. He was pleasant, and nice, and rather lovely. Because he liked you too.

And I quit every game I play. Alas, you thought it was a stupid, childish game. So, you put a stop to it before it could get out of control. Because you needed that control, and he didn't let you have it. He held the reigns in the relationship and you hated him more for that. But, you soon realized that it wasn't hate anymore. You loved him. Which made you more scared then ever before. So, you ran. As fast as you could.

But forgive me, love. I can't turn and walk away. You went back to him, though. It only took a month before you caved. You ran to his dorm, practically for your life, because you felt he was your lifeline. He was there, a smirk on his beautiful face, knowing you'd be back. You needn't say anything, because he was kissing you. And it was romantic and wonderful and scary. You knew he missed you by the way his hands roamed all over your body, remembering exactly where you liked to be touched. He looked at your face, staring even, trying to piece together the many reasons why you left in the first place.

I walk with your shadow. It's one of the reasons this relationship is so hard. You can't be seen together. A Slytherin and a Gryffindor together? It was imposturous. So, you snuck out every night, at the same time, to meet in the same place. You thought you're friends would ask where you were off to, wonder who you were meeting, but they never asked, never wondered. You hid your hurt, because you knew if the roles were reversed, you'd ask and wonder. Still, you were glad about it, and continued sneaking out to see him.

I'm sleeping in my bed with your silhouette. Even thought you make love, passionate and romantic, you can never stay in one another's arms afterwards. You must quickly dress and go back to the dorms because someone might catch you with the blond. He understands your haste, because he agrees whole-heartedly. He promises, however, that when school is over, you'll both come out and can be together forever. It's an empty promise you know, but it still feels nice to hear before you say good-night.

Should have smiled in that picture if it's the last that I'll see of you, it's the least that you could no do. For Christmas, you borrowed Colin's camera to take a photo, one that you would keep for years, hid under layers of clothing, a photo that you would take out often to look at and wonder what if. He doesn't smile in that photo, one regret you've always had. He doesn't know it won't last. It's cute, you think, but it makes it harder on you.

Leave the light on, I'll never give up on you. It's taken you three years after graduation to realize that no matter what, you can't forget him. Especially when out of the blue, he sends you an owl, telling you that he wants you still. That he yearns for your touch, your smell, your kiss. And it takes you back.

Leave the light on for me too. You send the owl back with no reply. But you clasp the letter in your hands, your eyes looking over every curved letter. You still love him. To hear that he feels the same excites you to your core. You must find him.

Back to me. I know that it comes back to me. He smirks when you run into his office. He knows you'd come, just like you had all those years ago. And you know you hate him for it, but not enough to leave again. You reach out for him, to touch him, kiss him, and he lets you control it this time. Because he knows you've had it just as hard as he has. So, he doesn't say anything, just moans when you kiss him on the neck, his favorite spot to be kissed, and you grin. He's always known you'd come back. He's always been snarky.

Doesn't it scare you, your will is not as strong as it used to be?