A/N: I just wanted to say, that I'm not continuing Sadame. Even if it kills me. I was stuck, but then a few people ::cough:: made me mad by threatening me, so no continuation.

However, this is a side-story. What happens to Hisoka after he goes home that night. 'Tis very sad.

Hisoka's POV.

Pairing: unrequited Tsuzuki x Hisoka (erm...sorta...)

Warnings: Angsty!Hisoka, angst... angst... and...um... I guess Tsuzuki being mean to 'Soka-chan. X.x

Disclaimer: Heheh. I wish?

Society tells us in words that unique is acceptable. It makes one stand out.

Society tells us in actions that being different makes you a freak.

But how different can one be before it's unnatural?

They say, "You laugh at me because I'm different. I laugh at you because you're all the same."

Inside though, they're crying to be the same. To be accepted.

To not be a monster.

Oni (demon)

The rain poured down hard as I walked through the empty streets. The dim streetlights created blotches of color in the down setting fog.

I was soaked to the bones and the heavy coat I was wearing dragged me down. I shivered slightly, but at the same moment I welcomed the numbness as it set in. All the pain seemed to be a little less and bearable at that moment.

My face was wet, but I was unsure if it was because of the rain or the tears I could not longer feel running down my face. Somehow, it no longer seemed to matter.

All the thoughts I tried to block out for so long ran through my mind at once.

"You're a demon child!! Why did I have to give birth to a thing like you?!?!

Laughing meekly bordering on hysteria, I continued to trudge my way through the murky streets. If I were to stop walking, I would break down right at that moment and not be able to stop.

So this is what love does to a person, I thought to myself. Laughing again, I felt a throbbing pain in my chest and started shaking. I couldn't stop. But only people who deserve to be loved are loved. Who would love a monster?

Trudging up the steps of my building, I stopped in front of my door. And started shaking. I couldn't stop and stared at my door.

The epitome of me was behind that door; or at least all of me I could collect. I didn't want to face that right now.

But I couldn't stand out here all night. I had work tomorrow.

Hesitantly and still shaking, I took out my keys, unlocked my door, and stepped inside.

Convincing myself I was only shaking because of walking in the rain, I headed for the shower to drench the cold out of me.

Taking off my clothes, I consciously tried not to look at my body.

Turning the water on, I drowned myself under it and tried for a moment to not think at all. To let it all go.

Opening my eyes, I accidentally saw my hands. And my arms. And those marks.

In a moment of blind insanity, I grabbed a bar of soap and started scrubbing my skin. And scrubbing. And scrubbing until my skin became a bright red.

But those disgusting marks wouldn't come off no matter how hard I scrubbed.

My skin burned painfully, but I didn't want to stop. I couldn't. Because, somehow, if I washed these marks off of me, maybe everything would be okay between Tsuzuki and me. Maybe he wouldn't be disgusted. And maybe, somehow, we could be together.

Collapsing in the bathtub, I closed my eyes momentarily and accepted defeat. I was a demon. A monster. Monsters couldn't wash their veneers away. And even if they did, they'd still be monsters.

Collecting myself, I got out of the bathtub and put on my pajamas. I didn't want to see those marks anymore. And though I had to sometime, if I could hide myself from them for even a while, it would be alright.

I climbed into bed, tired. And shut my eyes. I had to get up in an hour or two to go to work, but I needed to sleep right now. I couldn't handle reality.

But sleep did not come easy. Those thoughts I tried so hard to block out rang in my mind.

Monster. Demon child. Freak...

I rolled onto my side, and I could feel my face wet. My tears rolling off my cheeks.

For the first time in a long time, I let myself cry.

owari

A/N: ::weep:: I really needed to write this. My life has been so stressful, and somehow, I managed to connect to this fic

review, please?