real Emotion: Chapter 2 Anger Hatred Lust
Amanda's Ramblings:
Amanda: Hey. Heh, like you didn't see that coming in the last chapter, right?
Auron: Are you trying to kill me, woman?
Amanda: How can I? You're already dead.
Auron. Oh...Right.
Amanda: -_-*** I don't own Auron, FFX, or FFX-2, but if I did, Auron would be my sex slave.
********************************
A deep silence filled the airship's cabin, during which Ophelia kept her ice princess facade. Inside, however, every molecule of her being screamed for Auron, who's face was lined with a mish mash of emotions.
"Well?" Ophelia rolled her eyes. "Some welcome home." She started walking slowly back and forth in front of them. "Oh." She picked the Masemune up from it's resting place, twirled it once, and threw it, hilt first, at Auron who, out of reflex rather than conciousness, caught it. "It's too cumbersome."
Auron looked down at the sword, back to Ophelia. The sword. Ophelia. And again. His grip tightened on the hilt and then his hand relaxed, letting the sword drop to the floor. Before another word could be spoken, he turned on his heel and left the cabin, his back as stiff as a rod. Ophelia looked after him a moment, her face finally relaxing from it's assumed expression, and she felt tears sting her eyes. So much for happy endings.
"It's....It's really you?" Yuna took a cautious step forward. Ophelia nodded and Yuna caught her in a crushing hug, soon followed by Rikku, and then Brother, who was obviously trying to cop a feel.
Ophelia pulled out of the hug and landed a solid punch on Brother's jaw, sending him flying back. "You sick pervert! I'm you cousin, for God's sake!"
"Someone mind explaining what's going on? I mean, a hissy fit for Auron is nothing new, but what caused it this time?" Paine shifted her weight to one leg and crossed her arms, one brow arched.
"First, let me introduce myself." Ophelia tilted her head to the side. "I'm former summoner Ophelia. Auron was my guardian." A nudge in the ribs from Rikku made Ophelia sigh. "And....He was my lover. He was an unsent, and I gave up my existence on this plane to bring him to life. I'm also Yuna's sister and Rikku's cousin."
"Alright, and the Auron hissy fit?"
"That, I can't explain." Ophelia turned to Yuna. "What's wrong with him, Yuna?"
Yuna sighed and sat down on the steps leading to the elevator. "He's mourned you since you left, you know. For nearly three months after you disappeared he kept himself good and drunk. He even fought Sin that way. Since then, the mere thought of someone mentioning you brings out his worst temper."
Ophelia gave a shuddering sigh. "Should I go and talk to him?"
"I don't think it'll do much good." Rikku said. "He'll just go into one of his rages and we won't see him for a few days."
Ophelia's eyes filled with tears. "It wasn't supposed to happen this way. I expected to come back and find him, you know, happy, with a family or something. Not wasting his life away because I left. And that's not fair. He was going to do the same thing to me, in the end."
Rikku sidled closer. "Um, actually, hun, he wasn't." Ophelia sent her a skeptical look, and Rikku sighed. "One night, in the cabin, Auron and I got into a drinking contest. Auron's lips get veeeeery loose when he's drunk, and he spilled the beans to me."
"What?" Paine looked suprised. "Mr. Grumpy actually opened up about his feelings?"
"You never told me about this, Rikku." Yuna looked a little offended, and Rikku shrugged.
"It was private, you know? But since Opie's back..." The nickname earned her a scowl from Ophelia, and she continued. "He said that while the two of you were searching for the Masemune and crest, he did some serious thinking. He thought about everything the two of you had said since the beginning, and he realized he couldn't leave. With him being an unsent, it would pose a bit of a problem, since, because he was technically dead, the two of you couldn't have children, but he didn't care about that. All he wanted was to be with you."
"He.....Said that?" The tears in Ophelia's eyes slipped silently down her cheeks. Rikku patted her on the shoulder.
"He wasn't going to let himself be sent. He had decided, that when the time came, he would resist it, like he did at the Farplane, and the two of you could go on, happily ever after."
With that Ophelia burst into tears and buried her face into her hands. "Why the hell couldn't he just tell me?"
"That's....something you'll have to take up with him."
Ophelia nodded and stood, wiping her eyes. "Fine then, I will."
*************************
Ophelia approached from behind, cautious, her footsteps silent. Auron stood on the outside deck, his back to her, his gaze focused into the distance. He'd cut his hair since she'd last seen him, and more grey was showing than black. Was that her fault?
"What do you want?" His voice was harsh and cold, and so was his look, as he turned to face her. Ophelia stopped sort and blinked twice, wondering how on earth he'd heard her.
"Um...To talk?" She ended it on a hopeful note, hoping that maybe, in the back of his mind, he still cared for her, and would give her a chance to explain herself.
"I have nothing to say to a heartless bitch like you."
Those words stung, horribly, and Ophelia bowed her head, hiding her tears. She'd played at ice princess, now it was his turn to be cold and indifferent.
She took a deep breath, and let it out, crossing her arms. "If you'd just give me a chance to expla-"
"No, I don't think so. It might be a good idea for you to turn around and go back inside. Actually, here's a better one: Don't get back on the airship after we land." He turned away again, and this time Ophelia made no attempt to hide her tears.
"That isn't fair!"
"Life isn't fair. Get over it."
Ophelia saw red, and her hands balled into fists. "When did you become such a bastard?!?" she demanded, taking a few angry steps toward him. He gave her a scathing look that stopped her in her tracks, and turned his back to her once more.
"Look, I know I hurt you, but you have to understan-"
He turned to face her once again, his face lined with fury. "You know? You know?!? You know exactly shit about what I feel, and obviously you always have. You're a stupid little twit to think that what you did could ever make me happy. You disgust me. I hate you, and I have never hated another living being my entire life."
Ophelia felt as though she'd been slapped, and she stumbled back a few steps, as though he'd actually struck her. "You- You hate me?" Her voice was small, and her throat felt so tight it was amazing she even got the words out.
"Have you become mentally deficient since we last spoke? Yes, I hate you. If Yuna wouldn't nag me about it forever, I'd give you a good shove off of the airship and be done with you. You may think you can abandon people and come back and pick them up any time you like, but you are wrong. I'm am neither as niave nor forgiving as Yuna."
"Auron." That was all she could force out. "Auron," she said again, her voice starting to break. She dissolved into bone-wracking sobs, wrapping her arms around her middle and kneeling on the deck. She rocked slightly back and forth, trying to comfort herself. It wasn't supposed to happen this way. It just wasn't. They were supposed to live happily ever after, right?
Auron watched this with an outwardly dispassionate expression, but inside, he felt his heart breaking for the second time. The first had come when he'd looked at her in the cabin, really looked at her, and realized who she was. She had lied to him. Lied to them all, and then had the audacity to show up again two years later and expect to be welcomed with open arms.
"But I love you," she whispered. "If you'd just let me explain what happened...But no, you're right." She stood and wiped her eyes, the mask sliding over her face again, until only her puffy eyes revealed that she could indeed feel emotion. She sketched a short bow. "Forgive me for intruding Sir Auron. It will not happen again. I will be glad to depart permanently from the Celcius at the next stop." She turned, heading back to the hatch, when he felt his heart wrench so painfully, he nearly cried out.
"Wait." She stopped short, but didn't glance back. "Alright. Every story must have an ending."
She turned, and began speaking, her voice void of all life. "I didn't abandon anyone. I did what I thought was right, which was my duty as a summoner, as the Mage of Judgement. I possess the power over life and death, and the will to use that power as I see fit. My guardian had been deprived of life prematurely, and I judged it to be unfair, and so sought to rectify it. I gave up my own existence on this plane so that he may live, and returned to where I came from. My memory of my pilgrimage was supposed to have been erased, but something went wrong, and it was not. Also, I was not supposed to have access to this plane ever again, but, out of the blue a month ago, a portal opened in my plane, and, without hesitation, I stepped through it. Two years had not passed for me, only a few months, and I had forgotten the time difference between this plane and my own. I searched Spira for my guardian, following every lead until I was able to track him down in Luca. There I proposed to seek him out and tell him my story, sure that he would understand. Sure of his love for me. Apparently, I had made another oversight, and have thus been cast away. I accept that as the consequences of my oversight."
She stopped. He watched her warily and she returned it with an apathetic, unblinking stare.
"And this is the truth."
"So as I see it."
Auron sighed and glanced down at his boots and then back at her. She had turned away, her gaze focused on the white clouds rushing by, and he took a deep breath, wondering if what he was about to do was the right thing. Throwing caution to the wind, he took three long strides to reach her, pulled her tightly against him, and kissed her roughly, letting her feel his anguish, his lust, his anger. Surprisingly, she returned it, her own pain present with every touch.
He only broke from her when he heard a very familiar voice comment, "Aww, they've kissed and made up. I knew they would." He glanced up to see Rikku doing her familiar bouncing motion and pulled away from Ophelia, who seemed dazed.
"Hey, Buddy's picked up some sphere readings, so you guys need to get on the bridge. Later!" Rikku bounced back inside, leaving Auron and Ophelia alone once more.
"Auron, I'm sorry about every-" Auron silenced her with a gesture.
"We'll talk more later. Apparently, I haven't changed as much as I thought I did."
"What do you mean?" Ophelia looked confused, and was even more so when Auron actually smiled.
"All you have to do is pout and you get your way."
"But I didn't pout."
"It was close enough."
"You can't be mad at me for what I did. It was going to be that way, anyhow. Or, at least I thought it was." She ducked her head a moment before meeting his gaze squarely. "Rikku told me what you were going to do. Why didn't you just tell me? This never would have happened."
"We both know I'm not good with words." He reached out and traced the contour of her cheek a moment, eyeing her thoughtfully. "I've dreamed of this moment for two years, and when I get the chance to see you again, I screw up."
"I can't say I was on my best behavior. I figured you'd be married by now."
"Never." He straightened and pinned her with a piercing gaze. "It's only been a few months? For you, that is." She nodded and he sighed. "Then I have a lot of harsh words to make up for."
Ophelia shook her head. "I deserve every one of them. I don't blame you if you hate me."
"But I don't." He moved closer, so that they were mere inches apart. "It's the damndest thing, but I still love you. I always will. Seeing you again has only reinforced that." He took her hand and led her to the hatch, all the while mentally kicking himself. He shouldn't have yelled at her. He shouldn't. Now he had to pray that she would forgive him.
**********
Chapter two done! WoOt!
Amanda's Ramblings:
Amanda: Hey. Heh, like you didn't see that coming in the last chapter, right?
Auron: Are you trying to kill me, woman?
Amanda: How can I? You're already dead.
Auron. Oh...Right.
Amanda: -_-*** I don't own Auron, FFX, or FFX-2, but if I did, Auron would be my sex slave.
********************************
A deep silence filled the airship's cabin, during which Ophelia kept her ice princess facade. Inside, however, every molecule of her being screamed for Auron, who's face was lined with a mish mash of emotions.
"Well?" Ophelia rolled her eyes. "Some welcome home." She started walking slowly back and forth in front of them. "Oh." She picked the Masemune up from it's resting place, twirled it once, and threw it, hilt first, at Auron who, out of reflex rather than conciousness, caught it. "It's too cumbersome."
Auron looked down at the sword, back to Ophelia. The sword. Ophelia. And again. His grip tightened on the hilt and then his hand relaxed, letting the sword drop to the floor. Before another word could be spoken, he turned on his heel and left the cabin, his back as stiff as a rod. Ophelia looked after him a moment, her face finally relaxing from it's assumed expression, and she felt tears sting her eyes. So much for happy endings.
"It's....It's really you?" Yuna took a cautious step forward. Ophelia nodded and Yuna caught her in a crushing hug, soon followed by Rikku, and then Brother, who was obviously trying to cop a feel.
Ophelia pulled out of the hug and landed a solid punch on Brother's jaw, sending him flying back. "You sick pervert! I'm you cousin, for God's sake!"
"Someone mind explaining what's going on? I mean, a hissy fit for Auron is nothing new, but what caused it this time?" Paine shifted her weight to one leg and crossed her arms, one brow arched.
"First, let me introduce myself." Ophelia tilted her head to the side. "I'm former summoner Ophelia. Auron was my guardian." A nudge in the ribs from Rikku made Ophelia sigh. "And....He was my lover. He was an unsent, and I gave up my existence on this plane to bring him to life. I'm also Yuna's sister and Rikku's cousin."
"Alright, and the Auron hissy fit?"
"That, I can't explain." Ophelia turned to Yuna. "What's wrong with him, Yuna?"
Yuna sighed and sat down on the steps leading to the elevator. "He's mourned you since you left, you know. For nearly three months after you disappeared he kept himself good and drunk. He even fought Sin that way. Since then, the mere thought of someone mentioning you brings out his worst temper."
Ophelia gave a shuddering sigh. "Should I go and talk to him?"
"I don't think it'll do much good." Rikku said. "He'll just go into one of his rages and we won't see him for a few days."
Ophelia's eyes filled with tears. "It wasn't supposed to happen this way. I expected to come back and find him, you know, happy, with a family or something. Not wasting his life away because I left. And that's not fair. He was going to do the same thing to me, in the end."
Rikku sidled closer. "Um, actually, hun, he wasn't." Ophelia sent her a skeptical look, and Rikku sighed. "One night, in the cabin, Auron and I got into a drinking contest. Auron's lips get veeeeery loose when he's drunk, and he spilled the beans to me."
"What?" Paine looked suprised. "Mr. Grumpy actually opened up about his feelings?"
"You never told me about this, Rikku." Yuna looked a little offended, and Rikku shrugged.
"It was private, you know? But since Opie's back..." The nickname earned her a scowl from Ophelia, and she continued. "He said that while the two of you were searching for the Masemune and crest, he did some serious thinking. He thought about everything the two of you had said since the beginning, and he realized he couldn't leave. With him being an unsent, it would pose a bit of a problem, since, because he was technically dead, the two of you couldn't have children, but he didn't care about that. All he wanted was to be with you."
"He.....Said that?" The tears in Ophelia's eyes slipped silently down her cheeks. Rikku patted her on the shoulder.
"He wasn't going to let himself be sent. He had decided, that when the time came, he would resist it, like he did at the Farplane, and the two of you could go on, happily ever after."
With that Ophelia burst into tears and buried her face into her hands. "Why the hell couldn't he just tell me?"
"That's....something you'll have to take up with him."
Ophelia nodded and stood, wiping her eyes. "Fine then, I will."
*************************
Ophelia approached from behind, cautious, her footsteps silent. Auron stood on the outside deck, his back to her, his gaze focused into the distance. He'd cut his hair since she'd last seen him, and more grey was showing than black. Was that her fault?
"What do you want?" His voice was harsh and cold, and so was his look, as he turned to face her. Ophelia stopped sort and blinked twice, wondering how on earth he'd heard her.
"Um...To talk?" She ended it on a hopeful note, hoping that maybe, in the back of his mind, he still cared for her, and would give her a chance to explain herself.
"I have nothing to say to a heartless bitch like you."
Those words stung, horribly, and Ophelia bowed her head, hiding her tears. She'd played at ice princess, now it was his turn to be cold and indifferent.
She took a deep breath, and let it out, crossing her arms. "If you'd just give me a chance to expla-"
"No, I don't think so. It might be a good idea for you to turn around and go back inside. Actually, here's a better one: Don't get back on the airship after we land." He turned away again, and this time Ophelia made no attempt to hide her tears.
"That isn't fair!"
"Life isn't fair. Get over it."
Ophelia saw red, and her hands balled into fists. "When did you become such a bastard?!?" she demanded, taking a few angry steps toward him. He gave her a scathing look that stopped her in her tracks, and turned his back to her once more.
"Look, I know I hurt you, but you have to understan-"
He turned to face her once again, his face lined with fury. "You know? You know?!? You know exactly shit about what I feel, and obviously you always have. You're a stupid little twit to think that what you did could ever make me happy. You disgust me. I hate you, and I have never hated another living being my entire life."
Ophelia felt as though she'd been slapped, and she stumbled back a few steps, as though he'd actually struck her. "You- You hate me?" Her voice was small, and her throat felt so tight it was amazing she even got the words out.
"Have you become mentally deficient since we last spoke? Yes, I hate you. If Yuna wouldn't nag me about it forever, I'd give you a good shove off of the airship and be done with you. You may think you can abandon people and come back and pick them up any time you like, but you are wrong. I'm am neither as niave nor forgiving as Yuna."
"Auron." That was all she could force out. "Auron," she said again, her voice starting to break. She dissolved into bone-wracking sobs, wrapping her arms around her middle and kneeling on the deck. She rocked slightly back and forth, trying to comfort herself. It wasn't supposed to happen this way. It just wasn't. They were supposed to live happily ever after, right?
Auron watched this with an outwardly dispassionate expression, but inside, he felt his heart breaking for the second time. The first had come when he'd looked at her in the cabin, really looked at her, and realized who she was. She had lied to him. Lied to them all, and then had the audacity to show up again two years later and expect to be welcomed with open arms.
"But I love you," she whispered. "If you'd just let me explain what happened...But no, you're right." She stood and wiped her eyes, the mask sliding over her face again, until only her puffy eyes revealed that she could indeed feel emotion. She sketched a short bow. "Forgive me for intruding Sir Auron. It will not happen again. I will be glad to depart permanently from the Celcius at the next stop." She turned, heading back to the hatch, when he felt his heart wrench so painfully, he nearly cried out.
"Wait." She stopped short, but didn't glance back. "Alright. Every story must have an ending."
She turned, and began speaking, her voice void of all life. "I didn't abandon anyone. I did what I thought was right, which was my duty as a summoner, as the Mage of Judgement. I possess the power over life and death, and the will to use that power as I see fit. My guardian had been deprived of life prematurely, and I judged it to be unfair, and so sought to rectify it. I gave up my own existence on this plane so that he may live, and returned to where I came from. My memory of my pilgrimage was supposed to have been erased, but something went wrong, and it was not. Also, I was not supposed to have access to this plane ever again, but, out of the blue a month ago, a portal opened in my plane, and, without hesitation, I stepped through it. Two years had not passed for me, only a few months, and I had forgotten the time difference between this plane and my own. I searched Spira for my guardian, following every lead until I was able to track him down in Luca. There I proposed to seek him out and tell him my story, sure that he would understand. Sure of his love for me. Apparently, I had made another oversight, and have thus been cast away. I accept that as the consequences of my oversight."
She stopped. He watched her warily and she returned it with an apathetic, unblinking stare.
"And this is the truth."
"So as I see it."
Auron sighed and glanced down at his boots and then back at her. She had turned away, her gaze focused on the white clouds rushing by, and he took a deep breath, wondering if what he was about to do was the right thing. Throwing caution to the wind, he took three long strides to reach her, pulled her tightly against him, and kissed her roughly, letting her feel his anguish, his lust, his anger. Surprisingly, she returned it, her own pain present with every touch.
He only broke from her when he heard a very familiar voice comment, "Aww, they've kissed and made up. I knew they would." He glanced up to see Rikku doing her familiar bouncing motion and pulled away from Ophelia, who seemed dazed.
"Hey, Buddy's picked up some sphere readings, so you guys need to get on the bridge. Later!" Rikku bounced back inside, leaving Auron and Ophelia alone once more.
"Auron, I'm sorry about every-" Auron silenced her with a gesture.
"We'll talk more later. Apparently, I haven't changed as much as I thought I did."
"What do you mean?" Ophelia looked confused, and was even more so when Auron actually smiled.
"All you have to do is pout and you get your way."
"But I didn't pout."
"It was close enough."
"You can't be mad at me for what I did. It was going to be that way, anyhow. Or, at least I thought it was." She ducked her head a moment before meeting his gaze squarely. "Rikku told me what you were going to do. Why didn't you just tell me? This never would have happened."
"We both know I'm not good with words." He reached out and traced the contour of her cheek a moment, eyeing her thoughtfully. "I've dreamed of this moment for two years, and when I get the chance to see you again, I screw up."
"I can't say I was on my best behavior. I figured you'd be married by now."
"Never." He straightened and pinned her with a piercing gaze. "It's only been a few months? For you, that is." She nodded and he sighed. "Then I have a lot of harsh words to make up for."
Ophelia shook her head. "I deserve every one of them. I don't blame you if you hate me."
"But I don't." He moved closer, so that they were mere inches apart. "It's the damndest thing, but I still love you. I always will. Seeing you again has only reinforced that." He took her hand and led her to the hatch, all the while mentally kicking himself. He shouldn't have yelled at her. He shouldn't. Now he had to pray that she would forgive him.
**********
Chapter two done! WoOt!