In this story I mention many things that are copyright protected, and I use them with no harm intended so don't sue me plz.

Chapter 1

Those Damn Bed Bugs

As I lay in bed one night waiting for sleep to overcome me I was disturbed by a buzzing sound and producing this sound was none other then a pesky fly. I tried smacking it, but it evaded my hand. I tried blowing it away, but it kept returning. I tried swatting it with the pillow, scaring it with light, and poisoning it but it would not die. I finally gave up, covered my head with a pillow, and attempted sleep. Before the winds of sleep could carry me off to dream world I heard a small squeaky voice repeat my name over and over again. "Drew, Drew, Drew, wake up Drew."

Of course I didn't believe my ears, normally the voices in my head stop talking to me after 8:00 P.M. and it was well past midnight. I was instantly scared out of my sleepiness, threw the pillow off my head and looked for the source of the voice. Now with my pillow off my head the buzzing of the fly returned, but I didn't have time to worry about a fly, I had a mysterious voice to deal with. The fly landed on my shoulder and I heard the voice again. "Drew calm down."

"Who are you?" I asked.

"I am a Yar from Planet III in the Razak solar system. My name is Whatsamattau, but u can just call me Jeff." At this point I knew that the voice was coming from the fly on my shoulder but I didn't want to believe it. I knew that a Yar was an alien that looks very similar to our house fly but Yars only exist in a game. Don't they?

"What do you want with me?" I asked.

"I have been sent here to ask you to assist us in battling the Qotile, they have already destroyed our home planet IV and they won't stop till they have destroyed all of our planets or we defeat them."

"But why me? The only experience I have in fighting is in video games."

"That's exactly it; our computers tell us that you are the best when it comes to video games."

"Well I do play a lot but I'm sorry I just can't go with you and fight your wars. I belong here on Earth."

"Well too bad your coming with us whether you want to or not."

So I looked at this little insect on my shoulder and said. "Oh yea? You and what

army, are goina make me?"

And Jeff the Yar replied. "Me and this army." And that said Jeff the little, pesky, fly Yar grew to the size of a two door sports car. If I was scared before then I was terrified now. I was now face to face with a giant fly with two big red eyes that housed thousand of little red ones. Jeff backed me into a corner and said in a voice that was no longer squeaky and small but now deep and menacing. "Grab whatever you need -- we're going on a long trip." I didn't hesitate I just ran over to my closet, grabbed a duffle bag off the top shelf and started shoving all the pairs of blue jeans, socks, boxer, and T-shirts I could find. I put on a pair of jeans my brown leather bomber jacket and my toughest pair of shoes I could find which happened to be my big, heavy steel toed boots; I figured I would need shoes that would last a long time. Then I walked over to Jeff who had reduced his size again.

"Ok now what?" I asked Jeff who was buzzing around my trash can now. He then flew onto my shoulder again and said.

"Now we go outside and I'll signal for the ship." So I opened the window and was prepared to step outside onto the ground when I realized something -- my room is on the second floor. But it was too late I was falling. Upon impact the wind was knocked out of me and my vision started to fade, but I stayed strong and didn't black out I slowly got up and brushed the dirt and grass off of me. When I looked up, there was Jeff the giant Yar again. "Do you normally exit your house in that manner?" he asked.

"Bite me, Jeff."

"Hmmm I wouldn't mind taking a bite of you, but we need you to win a war. But perhaps after the war I can eat you."

"You're kidding right hehehe (small nervous laughter)?"

"Of course I'm not kidding we're giant flies we eat anything."

"Ahhhhhhh! (Curls up into fetal position and starts sucking thumb)." After about an hour of waiting for the ship Jeff looks up and says.

"Look the ship is here!"

"Wow! That's the coolest thing I've ever seen -- and I've been to Epcot." The ship didn't look like a flying saucer it was more of a honey comb shape. "So is it going to land and we walk in or is there some kinda beam that will take us up?"

"Well this is a …" Jeff started to answer but before he could finish a bright light shone from the bottom of the ship. I looked up into the light and said.

"Oh, so it is a …" But before I could finish a rope ladder unfurled from the ship and smacked me in the face. "Ow that hurt! What is a rope ladder doing on a space ship?!"

"Well that's what I was trying to tell you, this ship is for Yars and normally Yars just fly into the ship but you can't fly so you have to climb up a ladder."

"Well aren't you just informative?"

"Stop wasting time, hurry up and climb the ladder." so I shouldered my duffle bag and started to climb up the ladder as Jeff flew ahead of me into the portal hole.