Reviews:
Infamous One: Heh heh, you shall feel even sorrier for him soon. Or maybe not, I think things get a little better. But then they get worse! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Ahem. Erm, yes...
Lightbulby: Yes, beans be bad. I hate beans. Especially when they are vegetarian baked beans. How does one eat baked beans without bacon in them? Tell that to my mother...
Disclaimer: I do not own Fabio. Oh my gosh, thank the LORDI do not own Fabio. Eew...he's icky.
X. Bloating, Gas, Heartburn, and...Bobio?
Bill and Boba sat in the Fettmobile, surrounded by Dantooine Spice Beans. They, too, could fight the cheapskate consumer inside and had been set into a bean-buying frenzy.
"Boba?" Fett glared at Bill. "I mean, Your Lordship? Are we gonna die?"
"It doesn't look too good. If the devil-spawn don't get us, the stench from you bean-farts will."
"Eew. Too much information."
"Well, it's true!" Boba roared. He seemed to be doing a lot of roaring lately. "The gaseous stink that comes from your rear end smells like rotten rutabagas. ONLY THEY ROTTED IN A CORPSE!" Boba was so ticked off that he had to throw something at Bill. But everything was covered in beans. Everything except...
Before he could come to his sense, Boba had ripped off his helmet and thrown it at Bill, who sank into the beans from the impact. Realizing his terrible error, Boba also dove into the beans, trying to conceal his face. He held his breath as long as he could, but eventually he had to come up for air...
Bill rose from the beans and pressed the large, tender bump forming on his forehead. Then he noticed it was oddly quiet. Fett wasn't yelling at him! Bill smiled in joy. Where was Fett, anyway...?
As Bill thought these things, a head broke the surface of the beans. Gasping for air, Boba Fett revealed his face through the locks of dark hair draped across it.
"Who are you?" Bill was in awe.
"Who do you think I am? You mother?"
"But you're...a hunk! I am so confused..." Bill grabbed his head and started rocking back and forth.
"This is why I wear a helmet," Fett muttered.
"Weird, it's like, Fabio! Only...Bobio!"
"JUST SHUT UP!" Fett really was roaring a lot. That's very bad for the vocal chords, you know. "Just give me my helmet!"
Bill handed it over, still in awe that was actually (gasp) handsome! Boba pulled the helmet on and then shot Bill with a dart.
"By tomorrow he'll have forgotten everything."
Some things are just better forgotten.
Then Boba ate baked beans, bean soufflé, bean casserole, bean cookies, chicken-shaped beans, and bean milkshakes. Now let's guess who might need some Maalox Max, hmmn?