Disclaimer- If I owned Naruto... do you think I would sitting here with hunger pains? No, I would be off in a fancy restaurant (or Wendy's) eating my heart out.
QY- Keheeheeheehee, I feel an urge within me. ::does the Monty Burns finger thing:: Bwahaha, prepared to be surprised. I think. Possibly. ::furrows eyebrows:: Hmm...
Oh and sorry, this came a little later than it was supposed to for several personal reasons... I was starving and my stomach started eating itself. No joke. The pain distracted me, so I couldn't finish this... Well, it's here now. (This was made even later by the fact that this chapter couldn't be accessed for hours.)
Whee! Reviews!
Seito- Stupidly happy that you liked. Nyah, hugs!! ::giggle:: Sugar rush are good for you, no?
AnimeFreakPerson- No! The horror. I'm ashamed of your best friends! ::wags fingers at them:: I glad reading the last chapter made you feel better. This chapter was written especially with you in mind. Happy Belated Birthday! And hey, if I still see you around this time next year, I'll write you a fic for your bday, k?
Kyuubi-kun- ::fangirls...again:: Kyah! (I would have to agree with you, it is indeed, very sad. America... :shakes head::) I feel I should review your story too... I mean, I am reading it and I do think it's wonderfully well-written and deep (Talking about your recent fic)... Erm... one day, one day. Meanwhile, thank you for reviewing. ::hugs::
bhodi li- Shame, shame, I said it wasn't a crossover in the summary. If Sasuke was Alice in Wonderland and Naruto was the White Rabbit, it would've been one. ...but I didn't think of that, huh... that's interesting, it does seem that way a bit... Very interesting...
Aimi-chan- Ah, the whole point of this was to be random. And to get me into a funny mode to write DR. Glad you like my humor, it's a bit... weird at times. And the America thing.. shame that it's true, and can be used as a spur of the moment thing. Don't worry, I will finish DR, it's just taking me a little longer than I would like. Speaking of which, you never replied to my e-mail, did you get/check it? Heee, and it's still Naruto.
xxphatxbaybeexx- :-D Thanx for reviewing this and the HP thing. And confusion is quite common for my stories. Genius child? Can I have your autograph? Lol, I'm kidding... unless you're willing to give it to me. Anyway, glad you liked the beginning, hope you'll like the ending.
hikari-enzeru- Haha, glad you liked it. And yes, this couple is indeed, great. Here's more and thanks for your review!
Kazzy- Hehe, don't worry about it, I'm confused too. As long as you like it tho... So here's what happens next (and last), I wrote more, I love you too, and bye-bye as well. Lol, it's too late, I need sleep.
sylver rain-I actually e-mailed you, so all I have left to tell you is... enjoy the last chapter!
Thanks to Seito for providing the idea of what's happening in Konoha. ::grin::
Into the Tree and Down We Go --- QianYun
Chapter II
A shiver passed through Sasuke's body as he continued to stare at the not-Naruto... thing in front of him. There really was something wrong with the picture, wasn't there? Sasuke's thoughts were interrupted as Naruto advanced towards the other boy.
"...Naruto?" A hesitant voice spoke, with Sasuke trying control his surprise, there was no way that Naruto was walking towards him like that. He wasn't even walking! He was like, slinking towards him lightly, seeming to glide over the floor. Frankly, it gave him the creeps.
"Hmm?" The voice which normally emitted an annoying, semi-grating tone was now soft and light, almost like floating on a cloud. It sounded distracted with a hint of...eh? Seduction?
Sure that he must be hearing things, Sasuke shook his head before turning away from Naruto.
Only to be met with the sight of snow yet again. As he stared around him, he was struck with a sense of wonder and curiosity. He knew he fell into the tree, there was no doubt about that, but was there?
For how was it possible that a tree could be internally filled with snow. Glancing around revealed that it stretched across the area. An area that was not flat by any means, but looked more like it was a portion of the earth wrapped by a wooden wall.
The land was full of trees, grass and flowers, all thriving under the - what should have been - cold weather. Snow was abundant, decorating the tree tops and rising several inches above the land. Little hills bumped up and shoved away the flat land, creating slopes and edges that provided the perfect playground- if you wanted to think that way.
To the far right of where Sasuke was standing, a lone wooden house stood proudly, jutting out from a nearby hill. And just like in those picturesque story houses, a red colored chimney stuck out, happily puffing its smoke up and away, up into the air, to disappear in the black hole that was the ceiling.
Distracted by the landscape presented before him, Sasuke barely noticed when Naruto walked up behind him, but he did notice when Naruto wrapped his arms around his torso.
Amazingly, Sasuke did nothing about it. Something about the place calmed him, something about this place called out to him. He merely stood there as Naruto stood on his toes to place his head on Sasuke's shoulder.
"It's beautiful, isn't it?" Naruto spoke softly, adding to the magic of the place. Snow lightly fell from what appeared to be out of nowhere, but at that moment, in that place, it seemed to be perfectly normal.
The air they drew in was cold and sweet, stingy and soothing.
For a moment, the two only breathed, in and out, second by second.
Until Sasuke noticed a suspicious smell coming from behind him. Reluctantly, he pried Naruto's arms away from him, wrinkling his nose at the whine that followed soon after. There was something smacking him inside for making Naruto let go, but he was determined to find out what was causing that smell...
Turning around, he noticed nothing out of place, not that he would really be able to tell, since he had only looked at the walls for a few moments at best. He passed his eyes across the wall, scrutinizing every length of vine.
In the midst of his searching, Naruto gave out a little whimper and arms immediately came up to wrap themselves around Sasuke. For a moment, he was lost in the embrace, but then that smell came back again...
From right below him!
Sasuke tried to move his head, but only managed to gag as Naruto's arms moved up to twine around his neck. Reaching his own hands up to his neck, he attempted to extract Naruto's arms, but he only managed to make Naruto press up against him more. Face turning slightly red, he frantically tugged at Naruto's arms, but to no avail.
Knowing that someone up there (or down there) hated him, he muttered a small, quick apology and rammed his elbow into Naruto.
With a slight 'oomph' and a "Hey!", Naruto let go of Sasuke and he was now free to examine whatever it was that he had smelt before.
Except, he didn't remember what he was looking for...
With confusion written all over his face, Sasuke was still and moved only his head, swiveling it around to search for what he was looking for.
Funny, he could've sworn he was looking for something important.
Shrugging his shoulders, he turned around to be greeted with the sight of Naruto with a pout on his face.
Something inside Sasuke melted, and something else in Sasuke woke up.
No, not his hormones, silly. His instincts!
And yes, Sasuke-silliness does have instincts. See, they're telling him right now to...
Maybe it's not his instincts telling him to walk over to the wall and hug it.
Hmm... there was something weird going on around here.
Unfortunately, at the moment, no one seemed to realize it. So we shall leave them here for a moment and visit Konoha for that exact moment.
--------------------
At that very moment in Konoha, chaos had a strong grasp. A grasp so tight that no one realized that it was there until disaster struck.
Unless you had a sweet tooth. In that case, you can jump for joy.
For at that very moment, as this whole story seems to be just a series of moments, the water in and around Konoha slowly turned a deep red color. It flowed thickly in some places and in some, a thin liquidly smooth texture.
The people in Konoha were very confused. And then scared. For that red liquid that replaced their water seemed to have all the qualities of blood.
Except for the smell. Since this was, as we all know, a hidden village, this meant that a large section of the village were shinobi whom had spent one point or another in their lives smelling blood, they immediately recognized that the red liquid oozing out of the faucets in their homes was not blood.
So that blood-curling scream you had heard from Tsunade's home was all a part of your imagination. But then again, perhaps she isn't the best example, she is, after all, afraid of blood. A really good example would be that other blood-curling scream that arose from Iruka's apartment. And let's all ignore that scream because imagining Umino Iruka scream at the sight of blood is ridiculous.
Alright, here we go, a blood-curling scream from Haruno Sakura's house. And as we all know she's a medical-nin.
So that doesn't work...
Okay, forget it, let's just take all the blood-curling screams that rang throughout Konoha as a sign that the people were now what we call, clinically insane.
Although Chouji seems to be rather happy, sticking a cup underneath the faucet and then happily chugging it down.
Curious, are you?
As was stated before, although the red liquid seemed like blood, it definitely didn't smell, nor taste like it. Nope, there was a sweet, tangy taste. Definitely not a metallic tinge that blood had.
And it definitely did not smell like blood, for it also had a sweet smell. A mouth-watering, drool-worthy, heavenly sweet smell.
For the red liquid was...
Fruit punch!
Haha, yes, it was. The best fruit punch that existed in this world, for it was one of the few that even existed in this world, this punch could cause even the strongest shinobi to become weak in the knees.
A punch that had even better effects than alcohol, it was close to being forbidden to all those under the age of 24 and over the age of 49. A punch that after several minutes, everyone was frantically drinking.
And since its effects were even better than alcohol, and with no hangover either, no one thought it weird when a 500 meter radius cake appeared above Konoha, shadowing most, if not all of the town.
No one thought it weird and so everyone tottered over to the tallest building of the town, Hokage Tower. Shinobi jumped directly through the cake and created a nice path for those non-shinobi to climb through. After the whole town had ascended the cake, a party broke out.
A line of people were created to supply all the necessary juice needed to keep the party wild. And above the cake - which by the way was a quarter chocolate, a quarter regular, a quarter strawberry and farthest from the sun, a quarter ice cream - a mere 100 feet from the top of the cake were the nice, large, fluffy, white clouds that were actually starting to look a little gray...
And with this, we shall return to the only two people not on top... of... the... cake...
Something really is wrong, huh?
Returning to our two favorite angst filled couple...
In other stories, not this one...
--------------------
Even having left our two favorite couple for several minutes, it seems as if they still hadn't realized that something was wrong.
No, they were quite contently... ripping each other's clothes off?!
As we wait a few moments for our eyes to adjust from a scene change of a deliciously sweet cake to a interestingly hot scene, we can observe several pieces of clothing flying. Oh, would you look at that, we believe that was Sasuke's pants that just landed on the floor.
Now that our eyes have adjusted... we can now be severely disappointed as it seems that Sasuke had only changed his clothes.
Let us now speak a prayer for our sinning souls.
Aw hell, we all want to see them get it on.
But unfortunately, that shall not happen today as the two are now fully dressed.
Although that can be debated. While Naruto's clothes remained the same from the last time we saw him, Sasuke's clothes were rather... non-existent. While his clothes remained the same style as they had been for the past few years, they were much smaller.
And Sasuke didn't seem to mind at all.
Even though technically, the existence of snow meant that the temperature should be only a couple of degrees Celsius and only a few degrees above 32 degrees Fahrenheit, the short shorts and thin rag of a T-shirt seemed to be enough to keep him warm.
Or maybe it could be the proximity of Naruto.
A slight rise on the level of snow caused Naruto to stumble and in trying to stay upright, he frantically reached out, met Sasuke's clothes (somehow) and pulled him along the ride. Sasuke fell on top of Naruto and while this usually meant that we were in for a deep soul-searching meeting of the eyes, one cannot forget the circumstances of this particular story.
You cannot forget that they were still in a tree and that they were acting weirdly and yes, that there is snow.
And most importantly, you cannot forget the moving vines.
While Naruto's arms remained somewhere behind Sasuke, the mysterious moving vines took the chance to somehow use itself to bring packs of snow and stuff it down Sasuke's extremely small shirt.
A strangled gasp escaped Sasuke and he glared down at Naruto. He on the other hand, had no idea what happened and could only look back innocently. Sasuke, believing it to be one of those fake innocent looks that most people in the world used when they really were guilty, immediately scrambled back up, pulled Naruto along with him, bent down, gathered a handful of snow... and threw it right in his face.
Naruto's face donned a comical look as his eyes widened, looking astonished at the action that Sasuke took.
He quickly bent down, snatched a handful of snow, packed it in and threw it at Sasuke, who was not expecting such an action.
And with that a snowball fight began, and it seemed that the two returned to normal.
Well, maybe not completely to normal since they were laughing rather happily.
They ran through the landscape, every so often bending down to create more ammunition. For several hours they did this, not tiring out until the last very last moment when they collapsed against each other and the wall of the lone house that was jutting out of the hill.
Their breath came out in pants and were quite visible. They sat their for a moment more before their adrenalin ran dry, their blood circulated slower, and they began to feel cold.
Glad that they collapsed at such a convenient spot, Naruto and Sasuke slowly got up to walk through the door of the house. Opening it, they discovered that the house was nicely warm, a blazing fire in the fireplace and a bed to the far corner piled with covers. The only thing out of ordinary about the house were the vines crawling up the walls. Giving them only a momentary glance, the two teenagers walked to the fireplace and sat themselves before it. The warmth seeped into their bodies and they slowly relaxed.
At least, they did until Sasuke suddenly sat upright with a bewildered look upon himself and breathed a silent, "Oh...".
Naruto looked at him carelessly, lazily lifting his eyes to see Sasuke. "What is it?" He spoke softly, fatigue seettling down in his bones.
Ignoring the voice that told him not to look over, Sasuke did exactly that and at the very moment that he did so, he forgot what it was he was thinking.
Not only because Naruto made a rather alluring sight, blond hair and an orange fire created a rather lovely combination, but also because for some odd reason, the moment that he looked over at Naruto, his mind just completely... blanked out.
"I don't remember," he spoke frankly, not even having enough thoughts to be worried about what that meant.
Naruto merely blinked at Sasuke before shrugging and saying, "Well, when you do, tell me."
"Hmm..."
The two drifted off into silence, only the crackling of the fireplace breaking it.
And so, they fell asleep.
------------------------------
Meanwhile in Konoha, the cake was half gone, the juice was still flowing and they were now beyond being considered clinically insane.
------------------------------
Several minutes later, for they were not to be able to sleep for very long, the vines along the walls crept closer to the fireplace before slithering down to reach the floor. It continued to move towards the two boys, slowly, slowly.
Softly, it crawled on top of the two boys, wrapping themselves around the two and then proceeded to drag them along the floor, towards the door. Halfway there, the boys woke up.
Instantly, the two started to struggle in their binds, but they only managed to make them grow tighter.
Refusing to give up, the two quickly... fell asleep.
Ten minutes later, they woke up to find themselves in a room full of... torturing devices!
No, they weren't really, they had just woken up to see something much worse.
Females of all ages, shapes, sizes and color filled the room. All of them, or rather, none of them seemed to be very... They seemed out of place. As if they weren't on the same realm as the room they were in.
Sasuke and Naruto schooled their thoughts to reveal nothing of what they were thinking, but they weren't prepared for what they heard.
"While we would love to tell you that there's no reason-"
"-to be afraid, it is unfortunate that we-"
"-cannot. Things beyond our control has-"
"-brought you here into this room, through no-"
"-will of ours. We wish to quickly solve-"
"-this problem, but since we-"
"-do not know what exactly the problem is-"
"-we are afraid it may take some time. If you wish to-"
"-ask us any questions, we will-"
"-try our best to answer them. However-"
"-due to certain circumstances, we might not be able to tell-"
"-you the answers to some of-"
"-the questions you are bound to ask. So we-"
"can only hope that you will ask the right questions. For you will only get a few chances."
Throughout this all, the two males turned their heads so many times to keep track of who was talking that they became slightly dizzy. As such, it took them a little while before they could full process what the girls had told them.
They were trained shinobi and as such their only reactions were for their jaws to drop, eyes to widen and a large yell to be brought out.
Well, they were all from Naruto, but it only proved, quite well, that things had finally turned to normal. A bit.
As soon as he yelled, the females in the room were abruptly replaced by males. As before, they were all different and as before, they did not connect with the rest of the room.
This time, instead of all of them taking a turn to speak, only one spoke, but at a confusing rate. His words blurred together and the only thing they were able to hear was "...apparently chaos took hold...Leaf is to think of it...Sand and Mist...Rain in a bit of a..." and a whole other mess of words that made absolutely no sense.
When the boy, for that was what he was, just a boy, took a pause in his words, there was another abrupt change, except this time, half of the males in the room were replaced with females. One appeared right next to the still-speaking boy and immediately 'shush'-ed him. Immediately, he stopped speaking, a sheepish look crossing his face.
"Sorry."
The girl smiled and turned to the silent teenagers.
"Now, I'm sure that you have many questions to ask, Sasuke, Naruto..."
"Sasuke? Sasuke? Hey, Naruto! Hellooo!"
"I don't think that's working very well."
"Well, I can see
that, thank you very much."
"No need to be snippy with me. Honestly, hormonal girls."
"What was that?"
"Nothing, nothing."
"...but I first want to tell you that we are trying our very best, and unfortunately, we need all the time that we have to try to fix the problem, so we are unable to answer any of your questions. I apologize for dragging you guys all the way out here for nothing. But, well, at least you got a good rest, no?"
Sasuke narrowed his eyes at the girl, there was something suspicious about her... but as he had been throughout the whole story, his thoughts were interrupted before he could get any further as the room abruptly disappeared and along with it, all the people that had stood there silently.
All except the last girl who spoke.
"Now, Sasuke, I want you to keep this in mind when you wake up."
"I don't have to listen to anything you say."
"Of course you don't. If you feel that way, then there's no need to tell you. Have fun then!"
And with that, she left as well.
Throughout all of this, Naruto had only stood by, thinking to himself.
"Hey, Sasuke?"
"What?"
Naruto rolled his eyes, "Just because you don't know what's going on, you don't need to take it out on me. But anyway, have you noticed what you're wearing? And where we are?"
"Huh?" Sasuke looked down at himself, widened his eyes, looked up and around himself, and dropped his mouth, just a tad bit.
"What. The. Hell."
"What do you think she meant when she said, 'when you wake up'?" Naruto wondered out loud, feeling calm despite all the peculiarities around him. "And now that I think about it, why did we do the things we did anyway?"
"What... things?"
"You don't remember? That's weird, considering that I was hugging you a lot. I would've thought you noticed."
With that, Sauske's eyes completely bugged out and he paled dramatically, well as dramatically as you could get with him already being so pale.
"Tree, oh my god, the tree."
"Tree?"
"The tree that you bumped into! The tree that you, we, fell into! The tree that we're in right now! A tree that's hollow and filled with snow! A tree that..." Sasuke trailed off, finally remembering that thing he had been trying to remember for so long.
"The tree that has hallucinogens growing in it!"
"Hallucinogens? Why would they be growing here?" Naruto scratched the back of his head in confusion, "We're inside a tree, aren't we?"
"In case you haven't noticed, besides the fact that it's snowing in here, which is weird in and of itself, there are trees growing inside here as well. What's a few hallucination inducing plants?" As he spoke, Sasuke wandered over to the spot where he had first been.
The very spot where he saw that thing that he shouldn't have.
Although now that he thought about it, he supposed that it wasn't really too terrible. After all, he's seen Naruto naked several times in the past, no?
Distracted by the path his mind was taking, he nearly missed a slightly smoking patch off ground, but as soon as he passed over it, his nose picked up the smell and immediately, he slowed down his breathing.
Crouching down to examine further, he didn't notice the vines sneaking out from the walls until Naruto called out, "Your skills as a shinobi seems to be deteriorating rather quickly, Sasuke."
Turning his head swiftly to look at Naruto, he also caught a movement at the corner of his eye. Hurriedly, he jumped away from his crouching position, the vines missing him by a mere second.
As he moved away from the wall, his ears caught a faint, childish whine. For a moment, he thought it was Naruto, until he also heard the high-pitch it had.
It was the same voice that called him cute...
With that thought in mind, he was startled when he caught sight of a figure coming out of the walls.
After several seconds, a complete figure stepped out, taking the shape and form of a young female child, only, she was completely made out of wood.
"Now that's interesting."
"Now that's interesting."
In that moment, Sasuke thought his hearing was faulty as he heard two voices speaking the sentence at the same time. Naruto, and someone else, someone familiar.
He was a thought away from identifying the voice, but before he could, he dropped like a stone and behind him, Naruto did the same.
"Hey, I think they're waking up."
"Finally! They've been asleep for hours!"
'Asleep?' Sasuke thought as his consciousness returned to him. When did that happen?
Suddenly, a face appeared directly in his line of sight and he closed his eyes as a reflex.
"Sasuke, you okay?"
He attempted to talk, but was only able to groan.
"Hmm... I'm guessing that means yes."
"Of course it means yes, the bastard is never not okay."
"Ah! Naruto, I see you're doing much better than he is!"
"Yeah, well, I went through less than he did."
"What do you mean? You were the one who walked smacked into a tree. Sasuke only got hurt because he was stupidly walking right behind you. Hey... why was he walking directly behind you anyway?"
Naruto shrugged, "Who knows."
"You haven't answered my question, what do you mean, he went through more than you did?"
"Ah... you wouldn't believe me even if I told you."
"Really? Try me."
And with that, Naruto proceeded to tell Sakura, and Iruka, exactly what it was that happened.
Only to get laughed at moments later, but Naruto merely shrugged it off and said, "I told you guys you wouldn't believe me."
"Haha, but really Naruto, a giant cake over Konoha?"
At that moment, Sasuke groaned again and there was a rush over to his bed.
"Can you guys shut up. I have a headache and you're blabbering isn't helping."
"Ah, well, I see he's back to normal." A cheerful voice spoke, "I'll be leaving now then, need to finish up some paperwork, I'll see you guys later or something." With that, Iruka left, but not without dragging the irate Sakura with him as well.
Naruto only responded with a faint "It took him long enough to get back to normal."
And with that, Naruto and Sasuke's journey into the giant tree and the new 'world' was over, only to discover it was only a dream, with drug induced hallucinations inside the dream.
Or was it?
Owari
QY- Bwahahahaha. This turned out slightly different than I expected, a lot of things got cut out, some things forced its way into this, but after 5 hours, I'm finally done! And in case you guys were wondering, the random appearances of the people who didn't seem to belong don't really refer to anybody. Just randomness. And as you can tell from the inserting of males, it's not really the yaoi-fangirls. Ah, you can take it how you like it. This whole story was just totally random and a useless waste of space.
Of course, hopefully, it was a funny waste of space, you can tell me all about it in a review, ne? Any questions you may have will be answered through an e-mail if you wish to know about it. It will mostly turn out to be like an extension-explanation of this in e-mail form if you do ask me and you do give me an e-mail address, so take caution, lol.
Written: 12/11/04 7 p.m. to 12:28 a.m. (I need to stop finishing minutes away from when I sleep, I can never edit it, or ask myself if I should really be uploading this)