Chapter 11- Mithlond: The Beginning
Elladan glanced down at the elleth in his arms, and had to laugh at himself. Of all the things that could have happened on this trip, this was the last thing he had expected. He could have never seen it coming, no matter how hard he tried to see it over the past week. Silaerín and her streaks of bravery were something that he was used to and could usually predict, but this was courage from her he had never seen or heard before. The likelihood of this elleth actually broaching the subject she had, and speaking of them with such a serious, straight face, was as slim a one as the possibility that she would one day be free of her father's controlling. For a few moments he even had to look at her closely to make sure she was the same elleth, and not some imposter that had a remarkable resemblance to her. It was just so unlike her...
And he was the last person he thought that would be so bashful about the things they had spoken of, but the truth was, there was no other elleth or woman in Arda that he felt the same about, as he did with Silaerín. It was this personal knowledge that had worried him the most. He worried that he would never be able to stand up to the image of perfection she had somehow built up in her mind. And he would never, ever feel as though he deserved to be with her in any shape or form besides that of a friendship. He knew what he did on a regular basis with females, granted that it was not much in some people's eyes, and it did nothing to make him feel better. She deserved someone better than he; someone who did not do those things habitually. He was not perfect, he never could be perfect, and he would never equal her. He would always feel secondary to how breathtaking she truly was.
No matter how courageous she became on the subjects she had broached, he would still by the more experienced. He would still feel like he was taking advantage of her every time he touched her. Even though she was brave in her words, Elladan knew that when words ran out and her mouth was occupied by other things, she would be the shy, and nervous, Silaerín... the Silaerín that they both knew hid beneath the strong words.
"I would kill him if he was not my brother," Silaerín seethed, glancing quickly at him and drawing him out of his reverie.
He looked down at her, "You do not know how to."
She scoffed, "What do you mean I do not know how? I think I could efficiently operate a small dagger of some sort."
"True," he replied, and let a chuckle escape him. "Remind me to stay a good distance from you when you are angry and close to a dagger."
"If I can see through my fury, then I will remember to," she said, and met his eyes. "But I would think twice before angering me."
Elladan smiled to himself, "Aye, I have learned that much."
Each grew silent as Elladan turned to the side so that they could fit through the tiny entranceway into one of the main halls. And he did not know if it was fortunately or unfortunately, but it so happened that his mother and sister were sitting together a little way down the open-aired corridor, watching the storm from their vantage point and talking. His mother was the first to notice the sodden pair, and jumped to her feet quickly.
"What has happened?!" she questioned worriedly. "Why were you two out in this weather?"
Silaerín spoke before he could even think of a decent excuse, "I was growing tired of sitting in. I have gone out before in storms like these, but what I was not prepared for was slipping into a pool of water."
Celebrian nodded her head slowly, she only believing half of what Silaerín was saying. Elladan had seen this look many times before, and still to this day did he receive such looks from her, most recently because of his consorts with ellyth. And considering their current position, he was not surprised that she would be curious, though he did not expect she would act in such a way when it was Silaerín in context.
"She has hurt her leg," Elladan said, drawing her attention away from Silaerín. "And that is why I am carrying her, Naneth."
His mother chuckled, and sighed, "Take her to her chambers, Elladan."
Obeying his mother, he followed Silaerín's directions to her apartment chambers, while his mother and Arwen followed closely behind them. When they arrived at her chambers, he made a move to set Silaerín down on the bed, but Arwen interceded, "Do not set her on the bed. She is sopping wet."
"Then what would you have me do with her?" he asked sarcastically, though only half joking and he received a perturbed glance from both his mother and Silaerín.
"Set me on the lounge over there," Silaerín directed.
"And once you do that, you may go find your father and ask him to come tend to Silaerín. And then you can change out of your clothes," his mother instructed and glanced at Silaerín. "In the meanwhile, Arwen and I will help you change."
Elladan could not help but feel as though he were being scolded for all of this, as though this were all his doing that Silaerín had gone outside, but there was a slight tone to his mother's voice that told him this was completely different. After all, there had been those many times he had been truly scolded for his doings, Elrohir's doings and their joint doings, and the way his mother was going about this reprimand made him feel slightly suspicious. It seemed like she knew something that she was telling anyone.
"Do you know where Ada is?" Elladan asked, deciding it better to go find his father then trying to figure this mystery out. There would be another time to try to make since of his mother's ambiguous words and mood.
"The last I saw him, he was speaking with Lord Círdan," Celebrían replied. "Go now."
Elladan nodded his head, bowing slightly and leaving the chambers quickly, only to run into Elrohir, his father, and Lord Círdan in the corridor outside the front room. Each of them looked at him suspiciously, in the same way Arwen and his mother had, and it unnerved him. But nothing unnerved him more than the odd glimmer in Círdan's crystal blue-grey eyes. What did he know? Had he known what had happened and that was why he knew that they should come to Silaerín's chambers? Elladan then glanced at Elrohir, knowing exactly what was going through his twin's mind with only the hint of an amused smirk on his face.
"Silaerín is-," he began, but was cut off by his father.
"We know she is injured," Elrond smiled. "Go put on dry garments and come back quickly."
"Aye, Ada," Elladan replied and started down the corridor and to his guest chambers. This was not good. Now, when he was not even sure about his feelings, his entire family and the wise Lord Círdan would be jumping to conclusions.
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He returned shortly thereafter, in a clean, dry tunic and a pair of leggings, having had some time to think to himself, and still he was no closer to an answer on how he was going to deal with the inquisitive stares and the first time he was alone with Elrohir, who was sure to be the worst of them all. Stepping into the antechamber of her apartment, he could hear Silaerín's soft voice in a conversation with his father. Where had the other's gone? Were they still in there?
"Now how did you accomplish this again?" his father asked. "It seems impossible to me that an Elf could lose her balance so easily. Were you distracted by something?"
Elladan nearly choked then, and held his breath as he waited for Silaerín's response. The elleth sighed, "This is like the time you got me to admit what Elladan and Elrohir were doing in my chambers. Fortunately, I have learned not to fall for such things."
His father laughed, "Aye, that was rather easy to get you to break your silence, and I admit that I did take advantage of your trust when I said I would not tell them, because I did scold them for it."
Elladan could not believe what he was hearing. So it was Silaerín that ratted them out so long ago about being in the wardrobe? He knew all along that she was the only who could have done it, but he always made excuses that it was just his mother jumping to conclusions and his father believed her, or that someone had heard their discussing it at some other point. This was priceless information, and now it was time for he and Elrohir to devise someway to adequately give Silaerín her just desserts.
"You told them?" Silaerín questioned. "My lord, I thought I could trust you."
"You can trust me," he spoke, "but at the time I thought it more pertinent that they be scolded for hiding in your wardrobe. That was at a time when they needed to outgrow those habits."
Silaerín giggled quietly, "And did they?"
Elrond laughed, "You have been with them for the past few days, do you think that they have?"
"Elrohir, no," she replied. "Elladan, I suppose has not outgrown them, but he has been very quiet since your arrival."
"He has," his father said. "I assure you I do not know what has gotten into him, my lady. Though, I have an inclination to know what it is that has had him silenced these past few days. Perhaps once I learn the truth, I shall employ the same thing that has made him thus, in Imladris."
Elladan could feel his cheeks grow warm, though he tried to fight off the blush. Luckily, though, no one was around to see that the comment had affected him. And he, for certain, by now knew that his father had a very good idea as to what exactly had made his son act in such a way.
"Why do I have feeling you already know what has made him so?" Silaerín questioned.
"Because I was a young ellon once myself, though you may not believe that," his father said and then Elladan could hear the shifting of robes, signaling his father moving or at least standing from someplace. "Your ankle shall be fine by the morrow, but in the meanwhile, I will send Mílwen in to tend to you."
"Thank you," she replied.
Elladan stood out of the way of the doorway so that he would not be seen when the door was opened, wondering why his father had asked him to come back when he was not needed. His father opened the door and stepped into the outer room, glancing in his direction with a smile. He shut the door and motioned for Elladan to follow out into the corridor.
"What is it, Adar?" he questioned.
"How long were you listening?" Elrond asked.
"Long enough," Elladan replied. "Why?"
Elrond nodded his head and sighed heavily, "It was Celin who came to tell us what had happened."
"Elbereth," Elladan let this out in long breath. "And what has he told you?"
"Besides the fact that you were acting horribly distasteful towards his sister, doing things to her that were unacceptable in anyone's eyes?" he laughed. "Nothing."
"Ada, you must know I would never disrespect Silaerín in any way that Celin insinuates," Elladan said.
Elrond smiled, "I know you would not. You would not do anything like that because your mother and I have raised you that way. Even if it was not Silaerín, and some other elleth, you would never disrespect any elleth. However, with Silaerín, I believe you are being more heedful of respect with her."
"She deserves that much," Elladan replied.
"Aye, she does," he said. "But I will issue my one warning to you now. While I am overjoyed to see you moving in this direction, I fear what could happen when Nenvír finds out what has happened. And if you continue to grow in love with her, Nenvír will see this and try to prohibit it as much as he possibly can. That could even mean sending her to Aman against her will."
Elladan hung his head, pinching the bridge of his nose to try to fend off the increasing pressure behind his eyes. "I do not even know what is going on between us, Ada. I know that my feelings are not purely friendly anymore, but I do not know if that is signaling love or not."
Elrond sighed, "You will know at the right time if it is truly love or not... it takes time for some to decide that and feel in their heart. But you have plenty of time to decide that and make your choice. I only wanted to broach the subject of Nenvír with you, so you may consider how you will handle the eruption when it happens."
"What does Círdan think? Naneth?" he questioned.
"You need to stop worrying about what everyone thinks, or you will never get anywhere with Silaerín. Do what feels right to you," his father smiled. "Círdan is delighted, I believe. And your mother, well, I believe this is something your mother has wanted since the moment she saw you and Silaerín becoming so close in Imladris."
"I knew that she was acting oddly," Elladan said and shook his head with a short laugh.
Elrond chuckled, "She always acts oddly, Elladan. She is the daughter of Galadriel, of course she will act odd."
"You are lucky Iaurnaneth does not hear you say that," he replied.
"She has the ability to know it without me saying it. Your mother hearing it, however..." Elrond reminded and looked towards the far door to Silaerín's bedchambers. "Now, go tend to Silaerín. I suppose she would like it much better to spend her time laying in bed with you instead of her handmaid."
"What was wrong?" he asked.
"She only strained the muscles in her ankle and foot. It is nothing serious, but she should not walk until the morning," Elrond replied. "Should I have them send the evening meal for both of you?"
Elladan rolled his eyes, trying to ignore the embarrassment he was feeling speaking with his father on the matter. His relationship with his father was very good, but that still did nothing to quell his nerves when he was faced with these comments from his father. He walked to the door and glanced back at him, "Please send some."
He placed his hand on the doorknob and took a deep breath before entering the room. When he entered, however, she was no longer in her bed, but he could see through the balcony doors, that she was not standing under the covering of the balcony, looking out to the Sea. "Ada said you were to stay in bed."
She jumped slightly, and turned swiftly to meet his eyes, holding her robe closer together. "I thought we discussed that when you want my attention, you will at least give me some warning I am not alone."
"I lied," he said quietly, stepping out onto the balcony and joining her side. "And you did not answer my question."
"I can walk on it now," Silaerín said, demonstrating her ability to stand on her left leg.
"I am a fool, but not that much of a fool, Silaerín. It was your right leg that was injured," he laughed.
She met his eyes, her face emotionless for a moment before a devious smile crossed her lips, "You were paying attention."
"Aye, I was. I was also paying attention to Ada when he gave me the instructions that you were to stay in bed for the rest of the afternoon and evening," he said. "And yet you are out of it."
"It does not bother me when I stand on it," she replied, "but getting out here was another thing."
He laughed and quickly bent to lift her up in his arms again, eliciting a laugh and a punch to his chest. "That is awfully feeble resistance."
"I do not feel much like resisting, though I wanted you to know my displeasure of being whisked up so quickly," she said.
Elladan set her down on the bed carefully and straightened himself up, only to look down at her. "Why are you in such a bilious mood?"
"I am still angry with Celin," Silaerín sighed. "And I am worried about what will happen when Adar returns. This storm will not last forever."
"All we can do is hope it is not too horrible," Elladan replied. "But I think we should try to remain as secretive as possible, to cut down on the likelihood of inquisitive eyes finding us and spreading rumors."
She chuckled sarcastically, "Oh, there will still be plenty of gossip. My ladies are quite the busybodies, and if they even see us walking together, then there will be talk."
"You know what I mean about your father," he said.
"Aye, I agree, Elladan," she nodded. "Though he will create ideas anyway if he cannot see what we do in private."
Elladan chuckled, "What do you think we will do privately, my lady?"
"Quit trying to make me uncomfortable," she commanded.
"But it is working, so I think I will continue," he laughed and looked about the room for a chair.
Silaerín moved over on the bed and patted the spot she had vacated, "Sit down."
"You should listen to your own words, mell nín," he said quietly, meeting your eyes. "As long as you continue to make me uncomfortable, I will make you uncomfortable."
She pursed her lips together and crossed her arms over her chest, "Either you can sit, or you can leave. Your choice."
Proving that he was not the fool he said he was not only a few moments ago, he sat down on the bed beside her, glancing at her, "Now what?"
Silaerín smiled and reached up to touch his cheek and run her fingers down his jaw line, "Now we shall finish what we started before we were so rudely interrupted."
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Iaurnaneth- grandmother
Ada- Dad
Naneth/Nana- mother/mom
Mell nin- my dear
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A/N: Sorry about the long wait with this one. Monday brought about shopping for wedding dresses, Tuesday was my trip back to the university, and Wednesday had me busy with classes. Today's much needed self-proclaimed snow day is what gave me a moment to sit down and write. I hope you all enjoy!