Screams this was a G!!! I didn't know! I'm a ditz! Thank you so much for telling me! I owe ya one.
I am a little bit of loneliness a little bit of disregard
Handful of complaints but I can't help the fact that everybody can see
these scars
I am what I want you to want what I want you to feel
But it's like no matter what I do, I can't convince you, to just believe
this is real
So I let go, watching you, turn your back like you always do
Face away and pretend that I'm not
But I'll be here 'cause you're all that I got
I can't feel the way I did before
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
Time won't heal this damage anymore
Don't turn your back on me
I won't be ignored
Draco sat up in his room. He was head boy, so he had his own room. Big bed, lots of gadgets, stuff here and there...knives of all sorts. He even had his own personal house elf. He was of course, the badass of the school. Although, he had that perfect hair preppy side once in a while.
While thinking things over he moved around the room, putting things in order.
Even though he was 17 it seemed like old times. He still had a bit of growing up to do. His new age seemed to be taking effect. Although he was a slightly different person at home. Draco kept things to himself, having lots of emotional bodyguards. No matter how bad, or how good he felt. He wouldn't let you know it.
It was just hard to open up. After being kept down from doing that. Since he can remember, cutting was the only thing that he could let his emotions out. Till this time, no one had known, Pansy didn't know what they were, but Blasie might have known.
'Little Weasel talks too much. I think ill put this to potion good use. Damn bitch had to look at my arm. I wonder if she saw my wrist. Oh well, if she tells anyone. Hell will be served.'
------
Ginny was pissed when she went to bed, she couldn't sleep. 'Dammit, where my knife. WHERE IS IT!!' she screamed in her head. She felt around on the floor, and found it. She brought it up to her legs, cut, slit cut , cut. Not knowing what she was doing really. Just kept cutting and cutting. All she could think about was pain. Emotional pain. 'Thirty seven, hey that's a record.' She pulled the curtains around her, and slept on top of her covers. It was hurting, this was good to her. It meant it was working. The emotional pain was a lot harder to bear than physical pain. And that's exactly what the knife does.
Although Ginny went to bed peacefully, but she didn't sleep soundly. She kept waking up once in a while, kept thinking people were going to find her out. ' I guess ill have to deal with it' she thought. Ginny put the covers over her. 'Its bad enough Draco knows. I don't need people from my own house knowing. I have to live with them.'
Ginny slept soundly the rest of the night...or so she thought.
"Ginny! Wake up are you ok? You were moaning in your sleep like you were in pain!"
"Oh, sorry, I'm fine. Bad dream. Sorry to disturb you guys."
"Umm, ok. Well breakfast starts in five. Get ready Gin."
Ginny felt very tired and confused. She had to force herself out of the bed and quickly put on pants. She felt very grouchy. Ginny felt as though she wanted everyone to leave her alone. She felt like she was freaking out. Anyone that bugged her, she would tell them about it. Oh, would she tell them.
Ginny put on some black nail polish that she had from last Halloween, it looked cool against her slightly pale freckled skin. She wanted to make a statement, be who she's always wanted to be. No more little quiet Ginny. She brought out an old black shirt of Ron's, and some old torn and poorly dyed black jeans. She would still be her in her own way, just...well...her true self now. Some people call it a stage, others call it a life.
A lot of people stared at her. She knew what was going through their minds as she entered the Great Hall. ' Fake, It will be gone before tomorrow.'
Ginny went walking between the Gryffindor and Ravenclaw tables. Hermione turned around.
"Hey Gin, saved...a seat."
Ginny walked right past her, then turned around abruptly.
"Oh, I don't think ill be using it as much as you too. Ta ta..."
Hermione blushed as if she and Ron had been so discreet about it. Ron spit out his pumpkin juice onto Neville.
"Umm, you both know, she's kind of right. Its like every 5 minutes with you two." Neville said wiping his face off.
"What's Ginny's problem? She's been acting like such a ...twit..." Harry said, as he watched her...silently walk away. Even though in his mind he had to admit she looked good, all that black did something. It made her look bolder older. He watched her hair sway and... no wait. This is Ginny you're talking about. Miss. Damsel in distress help-me-Harry. Hmm.' He listen to his thoughts a little more, and once more began to eat.
Ginny walked off without ever looking back. She went over and sat with Luna and a few old friends she had been mindlessly neglecting, and started off a conversation. Ginny didn't even bother to look back at some of the blank expressions or confused expressions anyone had. They didn't care.
Luna was always weird in her own way, but that's what made her cool. Amille (a/n uh - mill ) would cause trouble, but oddly got high marks in classes, and knew almost as much as Hermione. She was also known to be the smart alec and crack a joke and be sarcastic a lot. And then there was Ginny. She hadn't had very many individual qualities before, but to just walk around behind them, talk to them. Now, she was the Goth.or so Ginny figured she was now.
They all just chatted away, and glad to be back to old times...well, they made on NEW exception.