Fic Title: Loss

Author: Moonpattern

Fandom: CSI

Pairing: Grissom/Sara

Date: December 2004

Feedback: I'll take feedback but please be gentle, I have already been on fire this month, lol!

Rating: (R sexual references/violence/mature subjects)

Disclaimer: ("This is not meant to be taken as true, I make no $$$ . . .")

Summary: Post No humans involved, Sara has some issues to work through

Dedications: Thanks to my friends Theresa and Amy for urging me on and the website people for the encouragement.

Sara Sidle sat in the office all by herself, and made sure no one was around, half of the crew was in the break room. Grissom was in his office with Sophia, she didn't even have time to register what she had just saw, she would realize and process it later. She sat in front of the computer and slowly began to type:

'The people Vs. Laura Sidle W/2, Modesto, California, 1984'

She thought for a minute before she went any further. Did she really want to know about her? Did she really want to know the outcome? It had been so many years and she didn't know, so why did she want to know now? Twenty years of not knowing, was this something she really wanted to know?

Sara thought for a minute. The latest case really rattled her. The one boy was starved to death, literally and the other two would have been right behind him if they hadn't found them. They were just little boys, the oldest being only nine years old. That was even younger than her when she got into the system. At least she had been thirteen, but thinking back, she knew that could have just as easily been her found dead curled up in a plastic tote in a dumpster, discarded like last weeks garbage. Some people just pissed her off. How someone could do that to children, let alone children that were related to them was beyond her.

The computer screen popped up. The search yielded what she wanted to know. It seemed that Laura had done some time, twenty years to be exact, was still serving her sentence in the minimum-security prison in Modesto. Based on the court files, she was due to be paroled in January. Sara silently wondered if she ever regretted what she had done. That lonely day in July was the last time her family was normal.

Sara jotted down some notes on the notepad and stuck it in her pocket and closed the computer screen before anyone saw what she was doing. She got up from her post and went to join the rest of them in the break room, pausing outside the door. In the break room Catherine and her crew were sitting chatting to Greg. Everyone was accounted for except Grissom and Sophia. Sara thought for a minute, oh right Sophia was in Grissom's office. It then donned on Sara the thought that had just rushed into her head. Sophia was with Grissom, in his office, that couldn't be good! Sara turned to head towards Grissom's office. She entered the doorway and knocked on the door. Grissom sat there with papers in front of him and looked up to see Sara in his doorway.

"Sara."

"Griss, can we talk?" She looked around for Sophia, she wasn't anywhere to be seen.

"Sure, Sara, come in, shut the door behind you."

Sara walked towards Grissom and sat in the chair in front of him. She was silent at first, trying to collect the thoughts she wanted to express to Grissom. She wanted to be honest with him but she knew she couldn't, not now, she didn't even know where to start. Grissom broke the silence.

"Sara, did you actually want to talk to me, or do you just enjoy my company?"

"I came here to talk, yes, but I am just finding it hard to tell you my problem. Could we do this somewhere else? Maybe dinner? I know I tried this before, but I really need someone to talk to, I am not comfortable talking to you here, if you don't want to go, I understand, it is just that I could really use a friend right now….." Grissom interrupted her.

"Sara, slow down! I can see something is bothering you, I will agree to dinner, as your friend as long as you promise to talk to me!"

"I'm sorry, I over talk, it is a bad habit, but I do promise to talk to you, when and where, do you have a preference?"

"It is your call, you are the vegetarian, not me, it is entirely up to you!"

"How about my apartment at five thirty tonight, how does that sound, I will cook supper for us." The words shot out of her mouth before she even got a chance to think.

"If that's what you want Sara, I will be there."

"Do you know where I live?"

"Yes!"

"Alright, I will see you then!" and she walked out. She didn't notice she had been fidgeting with her hands in her pocket and lost the piece of paper she had written the facts about her mother on. Grissom saw it fall and immediately got up and picked the paper up off the floor and opened it to read it:

Laura Sidle Modesto County Correctional Services

Inmate #255432-A

Parole hearing January 13th, 2005

Grissom scanned the paper for any clues, who was Laura Sidle? Why was she in Jail? Was this what Sara wanted to talk to him about? He placed the paper in his pocket and headed for the break room.