October 29th
6.30 P p.m.
Dear diary,
At the time of speaking, I am sitting at my desk. My hair is dangling loosely across my face, my cheeks are burning and my eyes are puffy. Before me lies a thoroughly soaked piece of written on parchment. My hands are in my hair, I am biting my lips and yet I don't feel bad.
Ha! Surprise, isn't it, my dear diary? Yes, I admit it- after my last note I was nothing less than broken- I've never ever entrusted those feelings to anyone, and certainly not to parchment. Now, I have, though, and yes, I could have ripped the parchment into pieces, wiped all ink away, but still, my quill has not only carved the words I so needed to get out into my parchment, but also in my mind. And no spell can ever wipe them away from that place… I felt miserable, broken- let's put it this way: "not entirely well"… But that is over now.
Though mere minutes ago, I was on the edge of not a nervous breakdown but a sheer heart attack, one small note has just made my day. Or no- has not made my day- has given me hope to eventually make my day. Yes, I am a pessimist. Always have been- it has protected me against many things in the long years of my life.
It all began a few hours ago- I came out of the girls' bathroom on the second floor… or no, I did not come out of it. When I was about to leave it, the voices of two very well-known students and the sudden mention of my name made me stand still. I don't know why- I have never been a curious person- but really, I could not risk another Marauder prank to be performed on me, so I listened. I hissed rather angrily at Myrtle, who was in a quite hysterical mood, but she eventually shut up and I heard them.
"I know it!" James Potter exclaimed quite enthusiastically. "Yeah, Padfoot," -the ridiculous nicknames those kids give each other!- "…mate, I know it! You, the so-called ladies' man of Hogwarts have not yet dated the Greatest Challenge of them all! Namely our dear Transfigurations teacher… admit it, Pads, you cannot hook our dear McGonagall, can you?"
At this, I merely smiled. Children are silly- fact of life. Then, a softer voice- Lily Evans, I suspected, snapped
"Really, James, grow up- I mean…"
But Black interrupted her… and how.
"Yeah well, you know, Prongs…" he said, totally ignoring Miss Evans.
"I know, but hey, that one is like, too much of a challenge… y'know what I mean?"
They both laughed- but I did not when I heard his next words.
"I mean, it's not as if any man will ever dare touch that one- I…"
I did not even hear the rest of their conversation. I ran out of the bathroom, pushing everything in my way aside, and to my own great frustration, I felt tears on my cheeks.
Potter and Black did not notice me, luckily, but I daresay Miss Evans did. She looked rather upset…
And so, in a blur, shocked, crying and feeling utterly ridiculous, I reached my rooms.
I was ridiculous. I mean, I am a teacher, and students say mean things about their teachers all the time. Second fact of life!
But those words cut straight through my heart… I am ashamed for it and yet I must admit it.
Those words ripped my heart out.
Until, only sheer minutes ago, a small piece of parchment was shoved under my door…
I will copy its words, dear diary, because it- she- made me happy. Stupid, but true.
"Dear Professor McGonagall," it, hesitatingly, began.
"I could not help but notice tears in your eyes earlier this day, as you accidentally overheard part of a "conversation"- if it deserves such a name- between James and Sirius. But, Professor, they are idiots but they are not mean. You haven't heard Sirius' entire sentence, Professor, when he spoke about "no man ever daring to touch you". Because his entire sentence was "it's not as if any man will ever dare touch that one- I… I think Dumbledore would skin the brave chap alive. I mean, it's so damn obvious… he almost eats her with his eyes."… I know this is immature talk, Professor, but you deserve to know exactly what they said. Anyway, I hope this made you feel any better. What you share with Professor Dumbledore is, I am sure of that, James Potter will never experience!
Yours sincerely,
Lily Evans"
I cried again after I had read that letter, but I cried out of happiness. My god… Lily Evans is a dear. Albus, Albus, could it be true?
There is hope for me!
That's law of nature no three.
There is hope for me.
Goodnight.
6.30 P p.m.
Dear diary,
At the time of speaking, I am sitting at my desk. My hair is dangling loosely across my face, my cheeks are burning and my eyes are puffy. Before me lies a thoroughly soaked piece of written on parchment. My hands are in my hair, I am biting my lips and yet I don't feel bad.
Ha! Surprise, isn't it, my dear diary? Yes, I admit it- after my last note I was nothing less than broken- I've never ever entrusted those feelings to anyone, and certainly not to parchment. Now, I have, though, and yes, I could have ripped the parchment into pieces, wiped all ink away, but still, my quill has not only carved the words I so needed to get out into my parchment, but also in my mind. And no spell can ever wipe them away from that place… I felt miserable, broken- let's put it this way: "not entirely well"… But that is over now.
Though mere minutes ago, I was on the edge of not a nervous breakdown but a sheer heart attack, one small note has just made my day. Or no- has not made my day- has given me hope to eventually make my day. Yes, I am a pessimist. Always have been- it has protected me against many things in the long years of my life.
It all began a few hours ago- I came out of the girls' bathroom on the second floor… or no, I did not come out of it. When I was about to leave it, the voices of two very well-known students and the sudden mention of my name made me stand still. I don't know why- I have never been a curious person- but really, I could not risk another Marauder prank to be performed on me, so I listened. I hissed rather angrily at Myrtle, who was in a quite hysterical mood, but she eventually shut up and I heard them.
"I know it!" James Potter exclaimed quite enthusiastically. "Yeah, Padfoot," -the ridiculous nicknames those kids give each other!- "…mate, I know it! You, the so-called ladies' man of Hogwarts have not yet dated the Greatest Challenge of them all! Namely our dear Transfigurations teacher… admit it, Pads, you cannot hook our dear McGonagall, can you?"
At this, I merely smiled. Children are silly- fact of life. Then, a softer voice- Lily Evans, I suspected, snapped
"Really, James, grow up- I mean…"
But Black interrupted her… and how.
"Yeah well, you know, Prongs…" he said, totally ignoring Miss Evans.
"I know, but hey, that one is like, too much of a challenge… y'know what I mean?"
They both laughed- but I did not when I heard his next words.
"I mean, it's not as if any man will ever dare touch that one- I…"
I did not even hear the rest of their conversation. I ran out of the bathroom, pushing everything in my way aside, and to my own great frustration, I felt tears on my cheeks.
Potter and Black did not notice me, luckily, but I daresay Miss Evans did. She looked rather upset…
And so, in a blur, shocked, crying and feeling utterly ridiculous, I reached my rooms.
I was ridiculous. I mean, I am a teacher, and students say mean things about their teachers all the time. Second fact of life!
But those words cut straight through my heart… I am ashamed for it and yet I must admit it.
Those words ripped my heart out.
Until, only sheer minutes ago, a small piece of parchment was shoved under my door…
I will copy its words, dear diary, because it- she- made me happy. Stupid, but true.
"Dear Professor McGonagall," it, hesitatingly, began.
"I could not help but notice tears in your eyes earlier this day, as you accidentally overheard part of a "conversation"- if it deserves such a name- between James and Sirius. But, Professor, they are idiots but they are not mean. You haven't heard Sirius' entire sentence, Professor, when he spoke about "no man ever daring to touch you". Because his entire sentence was "it's not as if any man will ever dare touch that one- I… I think Dumbledore would skin the brave chap alive. I mean, it's so damn obvious… he almost eats her with his eyes."… I know this is immature talk, Professor, but you deserve to know exactly what they said. Anyway, I hope this made you feel any better. What you share with Professor Dumbledore is, I am sure of that, James Potter will never experience!
Yours sincerely,
Lily Evans"
I cried again after I had read that letter, but I cried out of happiness. My god… Lily Evans is a dear. Albus, Albus, could it be true?
There is hope for me!
That's law of nature no three.
There is hope for me.
Goodnight.