Part 16: Beginning of a Beginning
Faith could still feel the shakes in her knees when she returned to the kitchen, driven inside by the fact that she'd wasted two hours leaning against the brick wall trying not to think. She screwed up. She massively, massively screwed up.
Worse, she may have just screwed everyone. All because she was trying to head off a confrontation she could see coming like a freight train.
Fuck it. Let Xander and Robin beat each other to death. I wash my hands. I tried.
The stomach scar blessed her with twinge, just to remind her what her gut thought of that idea.
She stumbled into the kitchen on shaky feet and nearly ran over Rona. "Don't you have bow training with Xander?" she snapped.
Rona quickly backed up, hands raised. "I didn't bail. Xander did."
Faith rubbed her face with her hands. Great. Xander was probably tucked in some corner of the house pouting, moping, or doing some such childish shit because Wood smacked him one.
"Catherine's down in the basement with him teaching him some moves," Rona said, not noticing that Faith had dropped her hands and that her face was scrunched with surprise. "He looked like he was having such a good time that I didn't wanna pull him away. So I told him I wasn't feeling so hot."
"Xander is…"
"Training with the Great Catherine."
Faith cleared her throat. "Unh, Rona? I'm not trying to…it's just that…" She shook her head and tried again. "You're always bitching about how much training you do, so I'm thinking you'd be psyched about the break. So why the hell are you acting like you've been ditched?"
"Am not," Rona sullenly replied.
"Yeah, because when I get a few hours' free time to do what the hell I want, I spend it moping in the kitchen," Faith dropped into a chair, eyes not leaving Rona's face. "Spill it."
"It's nothing."
Well it damn well was something. "You're crushin' on cyclops, aren'tchya?" When Rona looked at her like she had three heads, Faith tried again, "Or maybe something's bothering you? Look, there are other people around here you can talk to if there's a problem. Last I checked, no one died and made Xander house mother of the year."
"I don't see you volunteering."
Great. Somehow, don't ask her how, but someone had voted Faith onto the island of people who pretended the holiday kids' table didn't exist. Maybe she wasn't so hot on giving the advice, but she did have a perfectly good set of ears. "This is me volunteering."
"You won't tell Robin?" Rona sounded impossibly young as she asked the question.
And bingo, the something was big enough that Rona was willing to spill to her despite her relationship with Robin. Jesus, I wonder how much I'm not hearing because I've become 'the girlfriend,' Faith wondered. "Nope. You and me only."
Rona sat delicately in a kitchen chair.
"I don't understand why you think Xander's the only one you can…" Faith began.
"He calls me Rona Lisa."
"Okay, so what does that…"
"The only other person who ever called me that is my brother." Rona looked down at her tapping fingers. "My brother's even the same age, you know? They're actually kinda a lot alike."
"Xander reminds you of your brother." And really, she was trying not to laugh because she was pretty damn sure that there wasn't a single person in all of Cleveland who'd ever assume lily white Xander and Nubian princess Rona were at all related.
"They're both funny and the both know how to cheer me up," tap-tap-tap-tap-tap with the fingers, "and they're both soldiers. Well, Xander's not one officially but he is a soldier even if he isn't wearing an Army uniform."
"Your brother's in the Army." Faith's stomach dropped. Without asking she could see where this was going. She wasn't big on the news, but, hell, you'd have to be pretty self-involved to not notice the newspaper headlines.
"He finally got official word on when he gets rotated to the fighting," Rona quietly said. "I found out this morning."
"Xander knows that this has been hanging over his head?"
"I've been kinda dumping on him, yeah," Rona admitted.
"While you guys train with the bow and arrows."
"Yeah."
"Does he know about…"
"I was waiting to talk to him about it." Rona's mouth ticked and Faith could see it in her eyes, I will not cry, I will not cry, I will not cry…
"Look, I won't tell anyone, 'kay?" Faith promised. "I'm pretty sure if you grab Xander after he's done in the basement, he'll make the time to listen."
"I know, but I've been really crying on his shoulder and he's probably dealing with his own problems. But seeing him training with Catherine…he looked happier than I've ever seen him, you know? Maybe I shouldn't bring him down just because my life really sucks."
Faith shook her head. Rona needed someone in her corner and it seemed that all the emotional support functions had been abdicated to one person. And if she thought about it, Rona probably wasn't the only one running to Xander with all sorts of boo-boos. "Look, maybe you need to…I dunno, maybe you shouldn't be keeping this under your hat. Talk to Giles and tell him you need to get away to see your brother off."
Rona gave her a disbelieving look.
Are things this bad? Are things so bad that… Faith killed off the thought. She really and truly was out of touch, although she wasn't sure how much of it was because she was wrapped up in playing house with Robin and how much of it was because the other Slayers had stopped seeing her as one of the girls.
Faith got to her feet, her mind made up. "Look, I gotta interrupt Xander anyway with something, so I'm pretty sure you two can still make it to the range before sunset. Tell him you're feeling better when he gets his ass up here. I've got a feeling he'll know you need to talk."
"I don't want to…"
"I think he needs to help and knowing him, he'll run interference so you can clear out for as long as you need," Faith said. Without quite knowing why, she reached out and grasped Rona's restless hands in her own and softly added, "It'll be okay, me and Xander'll see to it."
Rona's face fought to maintain control. "Thanks."
A final tight nod and Faith propelled herself out of the kitchen and headed through the house, paying no mind to never-ending mill of people, cursing herself the entire way.
She hadn't been paying attention.
That was going to change.
No more stars-in-the-eyes for this girlfriend.
It was well past time for her to start sniffing for the bullshit because if Rona was anything close to a representative sample they were up to their eyeballs in trouble and no one at the top had a clue. This little venture was going down in flames if everyone started hiding out from everyone else.
But ya gotta wonder: Why are all the little girls running to Xander, hunh? Think he's filling their heads with something? Before I step my foot in, I better suss the real deal, see if maybe a one-eyed someone is talking out-of-school.
She eased open the door to the basement training room, stole down the stairs on cat feet, and made herself invisible in a corner at the base of the stairs.
"That was so cool!"
Not that she really had to try all that hard, given that certain parties were severely distracted.
"Show me how you did that." Xander was bouncing on the balls of his feet like some little kid who saw just what he wanted for Christmas, a sharp contrast to the livid bruise on his left cheekbone.
Faith knew how much that had to hurt, especially because a human hand gave it to him.
Catherine swiped her escaping hair out of her eyes. "Are you sure? I kicked you very hard."
"Awwww, I've been hit lots harder." And now he was sounding like an over-stimulated little kid.
"Fine. But you have to stand still. You're futching worse than Ruda!" Catherine laughed. As Xander complied, even to the point forcing his face into a stiff, serious look, Catherine took the measure of him. "Remember what we said about your center of gravity."
There was some shuffling, and Xander was in full-fighting stance. Faith could feel her head nodding in silent approval as she quickly cataloged how he shifted his weight, balanced on his feet, positioned his shoulders, and kept his limbs loose.
"Good, good," Catherine nodded to herself as she made the circle around him. "We need to work on this stance becoming second nature, but this will do. Now, remember what I said about waiting for an opening. Don't come charging in just because I'm coming at you swinging. And don't just go charging in because something big and ugly is bearing down on an ally. You've got to pick your shot and sometimes one shot is all you've got."
"Right." A grim tone. Xander was listening and concentrating
Damn, she's good. Can we keep her? Because near as she could tell, Catherine just worked a fucking miracle on a Cleveland Street. If she could do this with Xander in two hours, imagine what she could pull off with every single Slayer in the house within the freakin' week.
With no warning Catherine lunged an attack right from Xander's blindside. He must've been expecting it because he managed to avoid contact by dropping and rolling to his feet. The move left him enough breathing room to maneuver himself so Catherine was very firmly in his line of vision.
Approval, disapproval, nothing penetrated Catherine's face as she tried a new charge, sweeping out a leg in a kick.
Once again, Xander dropped into passive mode, crouching low. At the last possible minute, his own leg shot out and connected firmly with the back of Catherine's left knee.
The woman went down with a yell as Xander spun up into a standing position facing her. "I did it! Yes! Score one for the X-Man!" he whooped.
"Yeah, great for you," Catherine gritted between her teeth, holding her left knee in a hug to her chest.
"Oh, man!" Xander's eyes widened with horror. "I'm really, really sorry."
"No you're not," Catherine whimpered.
"Hey, look. Let me help you up."
Faith just knew where this was going and she leaned back against the wall with her arms crossed, impish grin lighting up her face. Catherine, in her humble opinion, was seriously rocking the house. When she saw Xander reach down to help the felled woman, Faith called out just for the hell of it: "Watch out!"
Xander's head whipped around to find the source of the warning just as Catherine's 'injured' leg shot out, catching him square in the chest. He landed on his ass with a whump and whoof of breath.
Catherine flipped to her feet, with a grin. "I love pulling that horsha on my students."
"Way to make a guy not trust you," Xander complained good-naturedly. "Okay, I had that coming. Object lesson: never trust a felled opponent. Go for the kill. I shoulda just cut off your head and then started running like hell because Ruda would've torn me into little itty bitty bits."
"Very good," Catherine nodded. She winked at Faith and added, "And don't think for one moment I'm helping you to your feet. You learn much too fast."
Faith raised her eyebrows in surprise at the compliment. Catherine had obviously forgotten that she just knocked a frigging legend in her own time on his ass.
It probably helped that said legend was acting less like a legend and more like a guy who was thrilled to pieces that he got knocked on his ass.
Xander clambered to his feet, grinning like a loon. Which matched the really loony look on…
The brakes screeched in her brain as she looked from the familiar face to the not-so-familiar one.
"Faith? What is it?" The smile on Xander's face disappeared and he was all intense concentration.
It wasn't so much that Catherine looked like the man standing next to her. She was shorter and slighter, her face more heart-shaped, eyes sleeper, and the hair not quite as dark although it was wilder with its insistent escape attempts from the elastic tying it back. But there was something about the way the smile lit up her face and the way it disappeared when something not-quite-okay was in the vicinity.
And it was the stubborn ghost of that smile that remained even when the face wasn't smiling at all.
This is stupid. A lot of people have the kind of smile that pulls in the eyes. Faith shook her head. But the odd notion worryingly stayed put.
Matched perfectly with those odd looks their invaders got when Catherine only gave them one name.
She could stop thinking like this any time now, because this was insane.
Still, there was that sniffing the bullshit promise, and right now Catherine was looking like she was covered in it.
"Faith?" Xander's insistent voice broke through. "You've got the thousand-mile stare."
"Is everything all right?" Catherine inquired.
"I need to work some energy off." And could she sound any more hesitant?
"Oh, I am sorry," Catherine apologized. "Charlie's probably finished consulting with Rupert. I should sit down and knock heads with my people so we're all plugged together when we discuss our situation later."
"I think you mean your people need to put their heads together," Xander grinned. "And I think you mean 'on the same page' instead of plugged together."
"Put our heads together?" Catherine looked confused. "How do you do that? And, what do pages have anything to do with…"
"I'll just assume that you've got it right and I'm an idiot," Xander interrupted with raised hands and wide eyes. "Has anyone told you that your colorful language is a barrel of confused monkeys?"
"Monkeys?" She shook her head. "I'm stopping right now, otherwise I'll be here all day and I'll have to listen to Charlie scold me for playing when I should be working." She nodded at the Slayer, fighting a smile, "Faith." And then she disappeared up the stairs.
"Very weird woman," Xander said approvingly.
"Takes one to know one," Faith muttered.
"Wow. That is perhaps the nicest thing you've ever said about me," he chuckled as he checked his watch. The good mood evaporated. "Oh shit. Rona." He scurried around the room, straightening used equipment, snatching up towels, and collecting discarded water bottles, all the while muttering under his breath. Faith heard "stupid" repeated a few times, along with "selfish" and "bastard."
"Catherine must've been quite the inspiration." Step carefully. Feel the real deal out.
"Faith, I don't have time…"
"You've been tossed around like a chew toy all morning and now you're all hot to have Rona kick your ass at archery. Talk about commitment to the mission."
Xander froze and he turned to face her, eyes narrowing in suspicion.
"Talked to Rona, by the way." Keep it casual. Make him wonder what Rona said. "She's all kinds of upset."
Xander closed his eyes and shook his head. "Aw, hell. No. Poor…" He swallowed the rest of his words.
Well, she wasn't going to get more out of him unless she let out a little rope. "Said she got a message about her brother." Significant pause. "Didn't know she had a brother, let alone one in uniform."
Xander's face sagged with relief. "Thank god. She finally told someone else. This has been killing me keeping this secret, but I promised and that's that. I kept telling her that she should talk to Robin, or hell, if she didn't feel comfortable with that, to at least talk to Giles, because…"
"I think right now Rona needs to first talk it out with the guy who's got the straight dope." Faith relaxed. Whatever the source of the problem, Xander turning rotten snake-in-the-grass wasn't it. "Look, given this morning, charging up there like you can fix everything may not be the best move."
Xander winced. "Yeah. I'm sure my diplomacy skills are really impressing the hell out of everyone. Sometimes my temper…" he shook his head. "Forget it."
There was no way she could phrase this question without making it sound like she was putting him down, but she needed to know if Rona was the only one worried about talking to people not named Xander. "Color me all curious, but why are you such the hot commodity?"
"Look, I really have to…"
"Spare me a few tics."
Xander's shoulders slumped. "Probably because I'm not a threat. I'm just the guy who fixes things, fires a mean arrow, and watches backs on patrol."
"So, why am I getting frozen out?"
"You're sleeping with the guy in charge."
Faith kicked at the basement floor. "Pretty much what I thought."
"Plus, you haven't really been 'one of the girls' since we voted you Queen for a Day back in the 'hood, right?" Faith looked up at that question and saw the intense concentration was back. He added, "Why does it bug you so much? I mean, Jesus, I figured you'd be happy that you weren't getting pulled into some of the drama."
"Rona's drama is pretty huge."
"Rona's is, but not everyone's," Xander shrugged. "Well, it's a big deal to them. Throw in the fact that they got a load of Slayer mission statements dumped in their laps and that it's beginning to dawn on them what being a Slayer actually means? Eggshell time to be had by all."
Faith crossed her arms and leaned back against the wall in thought. "You're seriously telling me that you're the only one who understands that? Even more than me or B? I'm not buying."
"Faith, think about this. Not one of the newbies really know any of us," Xander pointed out. "When the Sunnydale Potential brigade showed up, we were in full-blown crisis mode and none of us were exactly on our best behavior. Look at it this way: Giles is the mysterious guy who helped drag them into this mess in the first place, Buffy is the bitch who didn't care whether they lived or died while fighting in Sunnydale, Willow only has time for magic and her girlfriend, Robin stabbed people in the back because he wanted to off Spike for whatever reason, and Dawn's the hanger-on little sis who's not even a Potential."
"And you're just the veritable saint," Faith sarcastically replied.
"The worst you can say about me is that I kissed Buffy's ass, managed to convince a bunch of them that walking into a Caleb's lair without a plan was a good idea, and served as overall useless sidekick whose main contribution to the big fight was fixing the picture window on a regular basis. Oh, and getting stabbed in the gut by a demon woman. We can't forget that all-important contribution."
Harsh words with just enough truth. If anything, Robin and Xander were so on the same page it was crazy. "You don't actually believe any of this crap, do you?"
Xander rocked a hand. "Yes and no, I guess. I'm just trying to look at it from their point of view. Bugs me as much as it bugs you that I got elected the go-to guy when I was out of the room. Hence me actually trying to figure out 'why me' and that's what I've come up with. Trust me, none of this is giving me the big happy."
"This has got to stop."
"Oh, yeah," Xander emphatically agreed. "I mean, sure, some of it is just drama, but some of the problems are real problems and it's going to get real ugly if I don't get at least some of the girls to at least start talking to someone other than me or each other." Xander scowled. "Probably why I've been snapping at Robin so much lately. It's getting to me in a bad way and I feel like I can't do anything about it."
"Cause you're the guy who fixes things. Windows, people…" Faith chuckled. "Tell me how you're gonna fix the problem you've got waiting for you upstairs."
Xander looked at the basement ceiling. "I don't suppose you could talk to…"
"Can't. Promised I wouldn't spill."
"Great," Xander muttered. "Way to put it back in my court there, Faith. You're the woman with an in."
"Right now Robin and me in the same room is gonna spark a fight, so I don't think I can do shit."
"Oh, crap. Faith? What the hell did you say? Because your timing sucks." He scrubbed his face with the fistful of towels. "Damn. Forget it. I'll fix it. I'll go and apologize to Robin for being a smartass before I head out with Rona. Get the scoop from her, and then…"
Her hands clenched into fists. "No."
Xander looked at her. "No?"
Why the hell is this pissing me off? I want to stop a big blow up and this is the best way to… "Grow a fucking spine. Let him apologize. Last I checked you were the one that got bruised just for talking shit."
She watched his body language change from casual to defensive as the expression on his face shut down.
"Wouldn't be the first time."
She wished she could say the comment came as a surprise.
Without another word, he swept by her and walked up the stairs. As she watched his retreating back, she noticed his body language begin to transform halfway up the steps.
Amazing how he could go from coiled spring to bumbling cheerful in nearly a blink of an eye.
When he reached the top, she winced against his easy, upbeat tone. "Hey! Rona Lisa! Think you're getting off easy, hunh? I need me an ego boost. You, me, bows-n-arrows. Get 'em locked and loaded in five. I'm wiping the floor with you, baby!"
TBC…