Part 25: Spotlight on Buffy

Selected items from UNS Q&A session with Buffy Summers-rah, known as Summers-rah-sen to the Slayer Buffista and Unitan sects, circa September 2003. Camlin Tikri reporting.

Buffy Summers is an island of calm in the furious activity of the household. She keeps her own council as she moves with stunning grace through the crowds of younger Slayers here. This, her body language all but screams at us, is a woman who has walked through the fire and come out the other side not just alive, but stronger than before.

To the untrained eye she looks like the pretty blonde girl next door. Her tiny frame does not even hint at her raw power as a Slayer or her determination to successfully safeguard innocent lives. As history tells us, she was instrumental in the victory at the First Battle of Sun'dyal and was one of the forces behind opening up the Slayer Line beyond the Two to the Many who choose to accept the power and responsibility.

Her gentle stillness and her modest confidence are aspects of her personality that anyone who has read her writings already well know. Looking into her hazel eyes before her future becomes the past, you know that Summers-rah would be well-pleased by her simple epitaph: "Beloved Wife, Sister, Mother, and Friend: A True Hero in Heart."

What is most stunning about Summers-rah is her relationship with the electric Lanoire-rah. Both women seem content to live under the same roof, living their own lives, with no trace of antagonism, no hint of disagreement between them, and no tussling over leadership issues. Such a revelation borders on shocking, given the occasional verbal sparring and acrimony that sometimes exists between the Buffistas and the Faithists, despite the fact that both sects have readily join hands with each other and the Unitans on issues that involve safeguarding of human lives.

More stunning, there is no sense that anyone, not the Watchers, not the Slayers, not even Lanoire-rah or Summers-rah, truly understands the spiritual place some of the people in this household hold in the lives of the Slayers in our time. One can only wonder how things might have been altered had that been the case, as we find out in an exclusive UNS interview.

BS: …so it ended with all of us standing there at the edge of crater trying to figure out what to do. But the victory wasn't without a price. Some of our people died. I really felt for Xan—I mean Harris-rah-sen…did I get that right?

UNS: Unh, yes. I'm just…well, I have to admit that I'm surprised.

BS: About what?

UNS: That you're referring to Alexander as Harris-rah-sen. It's just, well, unexpected to hear it from…

BS: Well, I'm trying to be accommodating, you know, for your audience. I mean, they probably don't realize that he's just 'Xander' to us. But since he turns out to be all leader-y and saint-y…

UNS: [quickly] For the record, I wasn't the one who told you that.

BS: [leans forward to speak clearly into MemePad] No you did not, so no punishing Ms. Tikri for breaking the Prime Directive thingy. [leans back] For the record, in case the punishment for spilling is really serious.

UNS: I thank you for your generosity. But back to your use of Alexander's Faithist and Unitan titles…

BS: Faithist? Unitan? What is…

UNS: [squirming] I thought the explanation was fairly clear that Alexander's –sen suffix was a title strictly tied to certain Slayer religious sects.

BS: [slowly] Religious sects.

UNS: It was…I mean, when it was explained…

BS: I heard it, but I don't think it sunk in because we were all treating it like a joke. You mean it wasn't a joke? About the saint part, I mean. I'm not sure that I'm all that comfortable…Xander and Faith? I mean, don't get me wrong. I can actually kind of see…actually I can't…I'm not sure…

UNS: Certainly you believe in something.

BS: Well, yes. Of course. I haven't thought much about it, though.

UNS: What do you believe?

BS: I believe there's a heaven. I believe there are hells. Multiple. I believe in a solid right hook, the perfect flying kick, and in the sound of breaking a demon's neck. I believe crossbows are great if you want a flying fatality, but nothing takes out hulking rampaging evil like a good explosive. I believe Giles is the smartest man I'll ever know. I believe Willow is mistress of anything with a keyboard. I believe that Xander makes the best wooden stakes in this or any other dimension and he should turn that talent into becoming a real artist instead of wasting it on stakes. I believe Dawn is really my sister, even though I know it's not true. I believe Andrew is the best cook in the universe. I believe Wood really is trying too hard to be perfect—and I should know because I tried it myself and it always ends badly. I believe that under that tough exterior, there's a part of Faith that weeps like a baby every time she sees Bambi's mother get shot. I believe that sex can be hot or it can be tender, but not both. I believe in true love, but I believe that there are lots of things that look like true love but isn't.

UNS: I was talking about a deity.

BS: Oh. I guess.

UNS: Well, it's just that, from what I understand, Faith worships a deity called [checks MemePad] Cagney.

BS: [deadpan] Cagney. Figures.

UNS: And Alexander worships someone called Cat Woman.

BS: Now that I'd believe.

UNS: What deity do you…

BS: Look, can we get back to this whole Slayer religious sect thing? Because I'm really not all that comfortable…

UNS: Who do you believe is the source for all Slayer power?

BS: The First Slayer. And, much as it kills me to admit it, the bastards responsible for chaining her down and making her become a Slayer.

UNS: I, unh, don't understand.

BS: [mutters indistinctly]

UNS: I didn't catch that.

BS: [irritated] I said never mind. Forget I said anything. I only got part of the picture, so I might be missing something. Or at least I hope I am because otherwise… Besides, there's no point arguing about it now. It's all said and done. Water under London Bridge. Or is that London Bridge has fallen down? Whatever.

UNS: [slowly] So you believe the First Slayer is the source of all Slayers?

BS: Duh.

UNS: Even all the Slayers who came after the Great Awakening?

BS: Great Awakening?

UNS: The spell that allowed all adolescent Potentials to at last claim the Slayer power for themselves?

BS: Oh! The empowerment spell. [silence] I don't understand the question.

UNS: Who do you believe served is the source of Slayer power for newly activated Potentials?

BS: Your question makes no sense.

UNS: {sigh} You said the source of all Slayers is the First Slayer. Right?

BS: [suspicious] Yeeeeeeeessssss.

UNS: So, during the Great Awakening, did you or Faith serve as the link between the First Slayer and the new Slayers?

BS: [stunned silence]

UNS: Buffy? Buffy? Hello? [tentatively] Summers-rah?

BS: Summers-rah? [mutters indistinctly] Catherine called me that…you mean to say that…oh.my.god.

UNS: What?

BS: [gets out of chair and starts pacing] Are you telling me that somewhere out there that there's a –sen after my name? Just not in this particular crew because Ruda is a…what did you call her? Unitan? Faithist?

UNS: Well, there are different sects and…wait. No one has called you…you only found out about Alexander and Faith by accident and no one told you about you…[quickly adds] I didn't tell you about you so if you're leaping to conclusions you did it all by your futching self. Not my fault if you guessed…I mean, you didn't guess. I mean…

BS: Sonofabitch.

UNS: Look, we're getting off track here. Who is the source of…

BS: Neither. I mean, there's the First Slayer and that's it. Faith and I, we…well, we're not the source of anything. We're not.

UNS: Are you about to tell our audience that everything the Slayers of my time believe is a load of horsha?

BS: What? No! I wouldn't do that! Everyone has the right to believe what they believe and…I think…I mean…someone's wires have gotten seriously, seriously crossed. Faith and I didn't do anything. I mean, okay, I came up with the plan, and Willow did the spell, which she couldn't do without the Slayer's Scythe, which I found, even though everyone said I was wrong to go looking for it. Not that I knew there was an 'it' to find. And, well, I can't blame them in retrospect because we did get our butts soundly kicked when we first went looking for 'it' before we knew there was an 'it' that was or an 'it' to find.

UNS: Wait. I'm confused. So you're saying that you are the link?

BS: No! Look, all the Potentials that got activated by the spell already had the potential to be Slayers. We didn't give them anything. The power was already there and just waiting to be awakened. All we did was wake it. That's it. That's all. I swear. There are no links, missing or otherwise.

UNS: But it was your idea.

BS: That's not the same question! You're talking about a power source, and missing links, and who's right in the holier-than-thou sweepstakes. I'm just taking credit for an idea. Two. Different. Things. Where the hell do you people get this stuff?

UNS: The two theories have been with us since before humanity left Tara.

BS: What? No…

UNS: Wait. You're taking that wrong. I mean…if it's any consolation, you sound like a Unitan.

BS: [edges for the door] I have to go. I can't…I mean…I don't want to hear any more because it might…the Prime Directive thingy. I think…Igottago…[BS flees interview room]

UNS: Wait! I don't understand your answer! You didn't explain whether Faith or you are the link!

TBC…