Chapter 11

After that me and Shelby just hung out at Jacks all day. Buying drinks every once in a while so that Jack wouldn't ask us to leave. a lot of people came in around lunch time. Some I would have liked to talk to, but just didn't have the energy. So me and Shelby sat in silence, watching the crowd fade in and out. She reached out for my hand which was resting on the table while I smoked with the other. She entangled her fingers in mine and stroked my thumb with hers.

"Ponyboy? Can we leave now...just to talk and stuff." She said kind of quietly. I nodded and stood up with her. We pushed through the heavy door and started through the parking lot.

"Anything specific you'd bin' wanting to talk about, cause I was kind of wondering where we were gonna stay." I said after a few moments of silence.

"No, Ponyboy, you don't need a place to stay. But I'll find somewhere." She replied.

"I cant go home!" I cried. I was over-exaggerating, but I didn't want to go home and face my problems...I wanted to run from them.

I looked at Shelby and she looked real sad, like she was going to cry or something.

"Shelby..." I reached for her arm but she pulled away and shook her head.

"Let's..." She began, looking up at me, then looking away quickly, "Let's just go..." Shelby said continuing to walk. I sighed, and started to follow. I didn't push the subject until we were at the top of my street and she hadn't even looked at me once. I was sick of this ...sick of playing stupid games with Shelby. Sick and tired of having to guess what she was thinking.

"Shelby... look, stop ,just stop it." She kept walking. I wanted to yell at her, make her stop but I knew that wouldn't help.

"What?!" I yelled throwing my hands in the air, completely forgetting that I just decided this wouldn't help. "What did I do this time?! I'm sorry! I'm sorry I'm so stupid sometimes, I'm sorry I'm always wrong." I didn't know where I was going, but she had stopped moving and was facing me now. Maybe if I kept apologizing soon I would get the right one. "I...I'm sorry I don't always know what to do, I'm sorry I'm not so smooth with girls, I'm sorry you're in a fight with Two-Bit, I'm sorry you cant see your dad, I'm sorry I'm not a perfect boyfriend...and I'm sorry that I'm yelling at you right now." I said out of breath, very aware of all the people looking at us now. Shelby just looked at me for a second then did something that I didn't know what to think of. She grinned and looked down. I didn't know if I did something right or wrong, my mind was spinning.

"I'm sorry...I'm so sorry." She said swinging her arms around my neck and throwing her face into my chest. She was inhaling the cold air sharply into her lungs. I could feel her warm exhales through my T-shirt. I guess I must have done something right.

"Ponyboy," she sniffed, shifting her gaze up to my stormy, forest green eyes.

"Ponyboy, you and your brothers and Steve and Two-Bit have been through so much together after I left. And I haven't been here to help- at all. For me to show up and turn you against the people who love you the most is just so stupid and selfish of me. As of now, your family is more important than any silly girl." She placed her hands on my face and brought me down to her eye level. "So go home and straighten things out with Darrel. Two-Bit's stubborn, but Darry's gonna understand, I promise. Okay?" She bit her bottom lip, "For me?" Her dark eyes begging me, like they always did. Like all the girls did.

I kissed her lightly on the lips. That meant yes, and we both knew it. She smiled, I smiled. Then we both broke into laughter. I didn't know why...I'm not sure if she did, but whatever it was, it must have been funny. Because I was laughing so hard my abdomen was aching. I gave her a hug and started across the road to my house.

"I love you Ponyboy!" She screamed at me when I was on my doorstep. I turned to look at her, she looked real cute with her hair kind of messed up and wearing that over-sized leather jacket. She blew me a kiss, and I pretended to catch it as I walked into the house.

I breathed a sigh of relief, because it seemed as though no one was home. Then I stopped in mid- step because I heard the sound of water hitting the shower floor, then good old Sodapop belting out the words to a song I had heard before but couldn't name. I leaned against the wall.

Soda came out of the bathroom, clad in only a towel tied loosely around his waist, combing back his hair still singing. He hadn't even noticed I was there.

"Don't quit your day job buddy, " I said loudly from the other side of the room. He stopped and came running at me.

"Ponyboy! Ponyboy you're back! We thought you weren't gonna come back! Yihaw!" He said getting over excited again. He ran at me and pulled me tightly into a bear hug.

"Euuww! Soda, you're still wet! Get off'a me!" I screamed, out of breath from laughing and having the wind squeezed right out of me.

"I'm so glad you're back kiddo!" He said mussing up my hair before running into our room to get ready. When he came out, ready to make the ladies swoon over him as usual, he was looking confident. He had a nice shiner too. That wasn't unusual for him. Maybe that's why I wasn't smooth yet, I need confidence. Maybe I just wasn't smooth like Sodapop.

"I gotta get going, I'm going out with that girl from Dale's. I'll see you later though!" He said running out the door.

Soda had said they thought I wasn't coming back. Is this what I'm doing to them? We've lost so much and I'm not helping by acting so selfish. Maybe they thought I was going to run away like the time I had run away with Johnny. Not let anyone know where I was going, and just be gone. Scare the daylights out of them one more time, just for kicks. I thought sitting on the couch. But I wouldn't do that to them. I wouldn't do that to my family anymore, I was through with being the little kid always causing problems. I'm going to go back to the straight A Ponyboy who kept his mouth shut good and stayed out of trouble as much as he could. They won't have to worry about my problems anymore, I could handle my own life.

I walked into my room and laid on the bed. It was comfy and I was tired. I was out before I could have a second thought about having a nap.

I sat up quickly when the front door slammed shut.

"Anybody home?" Came Darrel's fatherly voice.

"Yep." I answered shortly. I yawned and then realized that silence had filled the house.

"Ponyboy?" Darry asked.

"Yep." I answered stupidly. I walked out of our room and leaned against the door. I didn't know if I should scowl or grin. It seems stupid that I was so confused of the atmosphere I didn't know what face to make. But it's true, because I didn't.

I walked out and we looked at eachother. No words exchanged. I was waiting for a big long, sentimental lecture, explaing how much he loved me and how much he cared about me. And how Two-Bit loved Shelby, and Two-bit was our best friend and we couldnt lose him. And how we would never fight again, even though we both knew that wasnt going to be the truth.

"I'm sorry." Was all he said. My eyes widened.

"This should only be between Shelby and Two-Bit, you shouldnt be dragged into it." I couldnt beleive he was apologizing to me. Maybe he didnt mean it but, hell, i'll take what I can get.

I nodded. I felt like giving him a hug or something but I thought it would make it a bit more sappy than it was. So I gave him a wide grin and threw myself on the couch. As I took a deep breath, relief filled my lungs.

Maybe everything wouldnt be so bad afterall.

"Hey Pony, d'you wanna invite Shelby over for supper?" Darry asked me after about half an hour. I whipped around.

"Really?" I asked him.

"Yeah sure if she wants to. Soda's bringing over his girl tonight too." He said, glancing out the window quickly. I was getting ready to call her when I realized I had no idea where she was. I was already halfway to the phone and I looked wildly at Darry. I didnt want to tell him I wasnt sure if Shelby even had a place to stay. It was starting to rain now too. Hard. So I backed up slowly to the couch and sat back down. Darry frowned at me.

"Arent you going to call her?" He inquired.

"Um...yeah. In-you know, a little bit, just later. Not now." I rolled my eyes at myself. Smooth Ponyboy. Usually I would've whipped something better up than that, but my mind was on Shelby. What if she hadnt found a place to stay, and was out in the rain right now. I almost thought about telling Darrel that I left her out there by herself but thought better of it.

I walked into my room again and looked int the mirror for the first time this morning. No one had mentioned it to em but I had one hell of a shiner. My right eye was bruised a dark blue-purple colour. It looked almost black actually. Even a little yellow by my cheek bone. The was some dried blood below my nose and my lip was pretty puffy. I was a mess, and looking at myself made me feel awful. But actually, I looked pretty tough. With my hair all messed up and greaseless, I looked like Dallas did after a fight.

I went into the bathroom and with a wet cloth, wiped the blood from my nose and the mud that was on my cheek for some reason. I greased my hair, but I didnt put too much in. I kind of liked the messy hair look now with my bruised eye and puffy lip. I was giving myself one last look over when the phone rang. I ran and picked it up, making sure I got there before Darry.

"Hello?"

"Hey Ponyboy!" Came Shelby's cheerful voice. It was always nice hearing her voice on the phone.

"Where you stayin'?" That's all I cared about right now.

"Angela's."

"Sheperds?" I asked her....i should've known really, what other Angela does she buddy around with?

"No the other one." She said, she was getting real sarcastic lately.

"There's lots of Angela's in Oklahoma, Shelby."

"Not in Tulsa there aint." She said cheerfully. I could hear yells behind her and then a beer bottle crash to the floor.

"You okay there?" I said quietly so Darry wouldnt hear me.

"Yeah...I mean, its not the greatest but I wont be here for too long...right?" She sounded sad.

"Right. Yeah it'll be alright in no time." I answered her slowly.

She exhaled over exagerratedly.

"Hey do you wanna come over to our place tonight?"

"Are you and Darry okay?"

"Uh, yeah." I said confused.

"So...hes alright with me coming over?" She said, she was skeptical.

"Yeah"

"Don't lie Pony." Shelby said, I almost gasped. I wasn't lying.

"I'm not!" I yelled.

"Come on... did you ask Darry?"

"Yes, I did. I'm not lying, not about anything."

She sighed. "I'm sorry Pony, i'm just a little worked up. Are you going to come and get me or should I walk over there?"

"No, I'll come get you. I'm coming now though okay?"

"Yep!"

"See you soon!" I said, but she had already hung up. It was pouring rain out, I could have asked Darry to give me a drive, but I really wanted to walk.

I started at a run over to the Shepherds. It wasnt that far from her place, and I thought maybe if I ran I wouldnt get too soaked, while I pulled my shirt up over my head.

I leaped up onto the front step and pounded heavily on the door.

"Just, come in!" Came a deep voice from inside.

I walked in and saw Tim Shepherd was the voice that had come from inside they're shack. Tim was on the couch with a trashy girl straddling him. Her hair was a fake blond, with dark, almost black roots that stuck out like a sore thumb. She had on a short leather skirt that, as I walked by, revealed her red panties that stuck out at the bottom. She was one of those fake girls that guys like Tim picked up in bars and dreaded seeing ever again.

"Is there a problem Curtis?" Tim said thickly, I jumped. "See something you like?" I just looked. It was the exact opposite that girl made me sick.

I walked into the hallway. A skinny hallway, with yellow stained walls. Dirty, oil handprints decorated the walls. I walked to the room, the second door. I heard Angela's voice.

"What about this one?" She asked, I walked in just then.

"It's perfect just like all the other ones." Shelby said dully.

"Hi...Shelby." I said, not very loud but it grabbed Shelby's attention. She turned quickly and smiled.

"Ponyboy?!" Angela gasped, she was standing there in only her bra and way-too-short skirt. Not trying very hard to cover herself from me. Shelby gave her a tired look. I would barely have noticed that Angela was in the room. Because Shelby looked different and I couldnt keep my eyes off of her.

She had her hair pulled back, in a neat, high ponytail. I hadnt realize how long her hair really was. She had on a yellow shirt with a denim skirt. Yellow was her colour, I decided.

"Hi." Shelby said shyly. You'd think we had just met, and were falling in love all over again. She walked over to me, our eyes not leaving the others. We held a gaze and I realized I must not have ever REALLY seen her eyes before, because her long hair was always partially covering them. But there was nothing for her to hide behind. Or hide from.

"Hi" I repeated.

"Hi" She said, and we both laughed. She bit her lip still looking into my eyes like she could see more than just my gray/green serious eyes.

"You ready?" I asked her, swallowing.

"Yeah." She said, releasing her lip from her teeth. "I am." We walked out of the room, ignoring everything else in the room. She grabbed her purse from the kitchen counter and we didnt even glance at Tim. I'm not even sure if he was still there. I'm not going to lie to you, I didnt notice anything but Shelby. We walked outside into the sheets of rain. I'll tell you when it rains in Tulsa, it rains.

I lifted my plaid un-buttoned shirt to somewhat cover the both of us from the rain as we ran to my house. When we got near I noticed Darry's truck was gone. He must have gone to pick up Sodapop and his date because of the rain. When we got in the house and and realized the power must have gone out with the rain. Thunder rumbled loudly outside as we shut the door. Lightning lit up the room and Shelby and me met eyes again. She smiled at me.

"Wheres Darrel?" She asked looking around.

"Um, not sure. Probably picking up Sodapop and his date, they're coming over too."

"Cool." Shelby said sitting on the couch. "You met this girl before?"

"Nope, you have though." I said, Shelby had been with them when they went to Dale's. She probably wouldn't remember though.

"Oh yeah? Whats her name?"

"I dont know." I said, Sodapop hadnt told me what her name was yet.

"Oh." Shelby smiled and looked at me. Right now, i felt as if my whole life was Shelby. Nothing else mattered right now, i just wanted this night to last forever.

" I love you." I said before thinking. We had never said that to eachother before. I'd always thought it, but never let it slip out of my mouth.

"I...I love you too Ponyboy." She said turning her whole body towards me. I reached up and took her face into my hand, stroking her cheek. I leaned in slowly staring at her wide eyes, i watched them flutter closed softly before closing my own. When our lips finally met, it felt like a thousand volts ran up my spine all the way to my mouth. It was such a soft kiss, she must have noticed my lip was swollen. I brought my other hand up to the back of her neck, and i leaned back pulling Shelby with me. I had my back against the arm of the couch, which wasnt all that comfortable to tell you the truth. Shelby was leaning on me completely, with her arms folded between us. I brought my slender arms down around her waist, and pulled her up closer to me. She pulled her arms out from under her weight and ran them through my hair slowly then brought them down to my face. Her thumb brushed over my bruise and i sucked in my breath and yanked away from her. She opened her eyes and realized my black eye.

"Oh, sorry Pony." She said pecking my lips lightly.

"It's okay. It didnt really hurt." It did hurt. I wasn't going to admit it though.

"You know that was really nice of you. What you did last night. Thanks." She said. The little light that flowed in from the window shone on her face, making her apear perfect. I listened to the rain falling on the windows and the sound of our own breath.

"It was worth it." I whispered and leaned in for another soft, gentle kiss. She grabbed my hand and we locked eyes as she brought our joined hands up and brushed her lips against the back of my hand. She leaned her head down on my chest, looking up at me.

"Ponyboy..."She began looking down at our hands. "What do you want to do when you get older?"

"What?" I laughed. What in hell was she talking about.

"Like you know, i want to quit smoking, and stop drinking for good. Get out of Tulsa and get a real job...what do you want?" She said staring at our hands still.

"Well...i dunno. Get a job. Get a nice house. Marry you." I said smilling at her, she had her chin resting on my chest. It felt nice to talk about this. She looked up at me and smirked, raising an eyebrow.

"Glory Pony, you must be picking up some charm from Sodapop huh?" She smiled and kissed me on the lips.

I heard the door open and Darry walk in. We both scrambled to get into sitting positions and look casual.

"Hey Dar," We both said.

"Where were you?" I asked him.

"Breaking up a fight." Darry sighed. Me and Shelby glanced quickly at eachother.

Great, just great.