Disclaimer: Final Fantasy X, and all related nouns and pronouns, appear courtesy of Square-Enix, formerly Squaresoft.
I realize that there are lots of people who don't think that a romantic relationship between Auron and Rikku could have worked out in any way. In fact, I shared that opinion, which is why I stage this story after the main plotline, to ensure that it would never have a chance to work out at all. Sad, no? All that is left to build on are memories.
And another note: This will be the last part of 'Correspondence'. It seems a bit rushed, but this is, truly, the end of this story. However, this will not be the last Aurikku that I will write. I have plenty of tales still in store, I just need to type the ideas out and present them to you.
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"CORRESPONDENCE"Inspired by Final Fantasy X
by Kairos27
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That particular night, the Farplane was dank and misty. The asphodel field was wet with early morning dew that caught on her bare legs like spider webs—if such things even existed in the Farplane. It was cold, clammy, and utterly silent. Ugh. Not Sesera's favorite place.
She'd ditched the parties for this, and all the while she was hoping that no one had noticed her absence. The always 'grown-up' Emie, now newly married with a kid on the way, would hardly have approved of Sesera running off now that she was in her late twenties, and she knew better, etc., etc. Screw that. There was something important to be done, and Emie, even with all her book-knowledge, could not have seen it.
Sesera had flown secretly, straight from Bikanel to Guadosalaam, in the small private airship she'd reconstructed at Djose while working for the Machine Faction. She had arrived quite late at night, but not late enough to avoid confronting some Guado. After a small altercation with the Guado (who were drunk) over parking and entrance fees to the Farplane, Sesera squeaked by, a few Gil poorer, nonetheless.
Now that she was inside, Sesera, not really having any idea how to go about her business, wandered around for a bit. Though damp and gloomily dark (the mist obscured many things, and it didn't help that it was night), the Farplane was still beautiful, with lilac and amethyst colors predominating, even in the water. Pyreflies were the main source of light in this place, and Sesera could still see, though how much was questionable.
Finally, Sesera took a deep breath and said out loud, "Hey, anyone here?"
A cloud of pyreflies rose up in a majestic column in front of her as soon as the last syllable left her mouth, slowly forming into a translucent form of a not-so-familiar person, but even so—
"Sudran?" Sesera knew. "Ruf tet oui…?"
"Oh, Sesera. E'ja seccat oui. Muug yd oui, ymm knufh ib."
Sudran. Mother.
"Sudran…" Sesera mumbled. She'd never really known her biological parents, it is true, but now she felt regretful. Her voice, the voice of this willowy blonde woman with a sad, serious expression on her face, as if quietly mourning the fact that she never got to see her daughter grow up, tugged at Sesera's blood and made it stir uneasily.
"What are you doing here at this hour?" Sudran asked in Al Bhed, of course. "It is past time for sleep."
"Sudran, I have come to see someone."
"Ah, so you have." The woman pressed her lips together in a dejected smile. "I see it."
"Sudran. I'm—I forgot about you," Sesera blurted, suddenly feeling very guilty about not remembering that her parents were supposed to be here, they were dead after all, and they thought about her and she didn't return the favor, and—
"Trouble not your heart, my little one," Sudran soothed, reached out an airy hand to the young woman, but the fingers floated through Sesera's solid tanned flesh. "You seek one called…what was his name again…Sir Auron of Bevelle. You have a message to give him from someone else."
"Yes, Sudran," Sesera confirmed, "That's it." She held up a wrinkled piece of thin paper, folded.
"Stay, and he will come to you," Sudran said, gesturing behind her. "A moment longer."
"Sudran—" Sesera began, but the woman put a finger to her lips, signaling for her to hush. A tender smile graced her thin face. "It is no fault of yours that we left so early, daughter, before you could have ever known us. You have grown well without us. There is no need for shame."
The pyreflies dissembled in front of Sesera, and the image of her mother vanished. Sesera drew a rough arm against her eyes. Blinking away tears she pretended weren't there, she sniffled, and then held her breath as the pyreflies came together again to form the six-foot figure of the legendary Guardian she had come to see. He was exactly as Rikku had told her he would be.
"So soon?" she asked flippantly.
"Who are you, and what do you want." His gruff baritone held no question mark.
"I have a letter for you, from Rikku. Being as that you can't hold solid things, I'm taking the liberty of reading it to you." Sesera arched an eyebrow. "So listen up."
He said nothing.
Sesera unfolded the piece of paper, and pulled out a small pocket flashlight to read it. The flashlight didn't work, much to her chagrin. "Hey, man, lend me a pyrefly or two?"
In response, a mass of pyreflies floated up till it was directly over the manuscript, a very propitious position. "Thank you. Now, here—" she hemmed importantly, trying to smother a bit of nervousness, and began to read.
Dear Auron,
I know you must be thinking I'm nuts to be writing a letter when I could just come on over and tell you what I have to say, but I have an explanation, and maybe it isn't any good but that's the way I feel, and I felt this is the right way because I don't want to say good-bye and maybe I don't have to but it sure seems like I should, and damn this letter isn't going anywhere, I have to find my place
Sesera paused. "The ink's smudged. Hold on a bit." She blinked, and suddenly understood. Teardrops.
Anyway, if you're hearing these words, I'm getting married. I don't know if you're going to feel anything by that but I wanted you to know. Gippal, well he asked me only a month ago, it took him two years since Tidus came back to ask me, and you don't know him but I think that's for the best, and I knew you wouldn't want me to say no just cause of you even though I really wanted to, but I can't ignore him, I love him but not like I could
Another pause. More ink smudges.
I miss you, I miss you lots. I wonder where you are at night and wonder if you feel happy or sad or you're just sleeping and dreaming like a Fayth only that your dreams don't become cities and people like Tidus, and I wonder if I'm in your dream, maybe not because you have a lot of happier things to dream about, and I carry your memory around like a stone, it doesn't weigh as much as it used to and I don't think Yunie knows, or anybody knows. I want to blame you cause you wrote that letter and you've been growing on me since and I pretend that everything's okay and it is but it isn't. You were cranky and mean to me but you never hated me, I never felt you hated me, and I'm glad, but you aren't here and so it's not the same, but Tidus is back and you're not, because you're dead and he just wasn't. And I don't know why I'm rambling like this, this has no point, I just wanted you to hear that I'm still thinking about you and can't get rid of you, and I'll never forget you as long as I live, and maybe I'll wake up tomorrow morning and decide not to go through with the wedding, and it's because of you, you big meany. I knew you were undead but I didn't care about that so much then when we found out because you looked too old anyway but now I care because you were mean enough to make me start liking you just when you had to go. You were in my dreams, but not anymore, and I wonder where you've gone, maybe it's because I've accepted your death a little more, but I wish you were here with me and it's not fair but it is kind of fair because you were dead anyway. And all I have is the Katana, do you know I can use it now. I'll be pledging myself to another man tomorrow, and I wish it was you but it can't be you, and I don't know if I can stand it waking up every morning and wishing you were there instead of him. Then why am I marrying him? He'd do something crazy like commit suicide if I said no. I want to say I love him, but I don't want you to feel bad, even if you did tell me to go and get married, I know that you'd still feel jealous. You were just that way, Auron, always pretending you weren't feeling anything but look at you and me now.
And now that I think about it, you and I, we seem more real in my memory, all the times you yelled at me, and I always think about rainbows and unicorns and butterflies and chocolate chip cookies and everything nice every time I remember, all things new and fresh and clean and sweet, and it stays more vivd in my memory than if I came to see you. Don't get mad, Auron, we are more real in my memory, and I want to live that dream, it doesn't make sense I know, but seeing you here and knowing you're dead, it would break the whole illusion and I'd go home and cry till my lungs collapsed and I'd never see rainbows and butterflies and chocolate chip cookies ever again if I thought of you as dead and gone and nothing but a foggy picture in a purple land filled with nothing but water and glow-in-the-dark flies, your shade here on earth that I can't hug and wish would hold me. I hate the fact that the Farplane is on Spira, it should be far far away, where I know I can't reach it, a place where I can believe you're real and warm and alive. But this is…it.
You wrote me a letter so I'm writing you a letter. I hope your dreams of me are sweet, just like mine are of you, you big meany. E muja oui.
Love,
Rikku
Sesera, who had teared up during the reading, blinked the drops away, and looked the translucent figure in his half-hidden face. "So she sent me to read it, and that's it. That's all I came here to do."
She turned on her heel, and added, without looking back, "By the way, she went through with the wedding. She was married this morning. She also wanted me to tell her that she's not scared of thunder anymore, not as much as she used to be."
No answer. Sesera heaved a sigh, and began to walk away.
"Wait."
"Hmm?" Sesera stopped and turned partway around. "Did you say something?"
The image of Auron slowly began to dissolve in pale green light. Pyreflies began to disassemble once more. By the time his words reached Sesera's ears, they were nothing more than a whispering sigh.
"I will always wait for her."
Sesera almost lost it. She didn't like crying, but she rubbed at her face, trying to rid herself of the tears that were now flowing, and trying to unclog her running nose. Clearing her throat gruffly, she tore the paper up into many small pieces, into the cloud of pyreflies, and let them float to the asphodel-covered ground.
"For you, Rikku," she whispered, and turned to leave the Farplane for the first and last time in this life.
Sesera passed through the gates, past the drunken Guado who were still there, drinking themselves into oblivion and climbed into the airship. Looking back at the entrance, she added, "Goodbye, Sudran."
She fired up the engine, grabbing a handkerchief and wiping her face. The comm.-sphere near the control panel suddenly spurted to life as she prepared for takeoff.
"Sesera! You idiot! Where are you? What are you doing out there? It's past midnight!" It was Emie, who didn't hide the concern in her voice and she tore into her friend. Behind her, Sesera could still see that the post-nuptial party was still raging full throttle.
"Emie," Sesera said, ignoring Emie's concerned spluttering, "Is Rikku still awake?"
"Rikku? Why, surprisingly, yes. And, do you know, she hasn't drunk a sip of alcohol tonight, so she's sober!"
"Let me talk to her. Private. Now, Emie!"
Emie vanished from sight for a moment, and Sesera pushed the thrusters, lifting off. By the time Rikku appeared on the sphere, Sesera's airship was already high in the air and racing away from Guadosalaam.
"Sesera?"
"Hey, there." Sesera turned her sphere to make it face her. "I did what you told me to do." How sad she looked, Sesera noted. And how very tired.
"Anything else?" Rikku asked softly.
"He said he'd wait for you. That's all he said." Sesera smiled comfortingly, as best as she could. "I'll be back at Home in about an hour. Don't wear yourself out."
"No, Sesera," she said, and then added, "Did you remember to…destroy it?"
"Sure did." Sesera nodded. Rikku smiled sadly, her lips parting.
"Thanks."
"No prob."
The comm.-sphere turned off. Sesera shifted her gaze back to the black, star-ridden sky and radar screen—all clear tonight, in the dark of very early morning. Today, Rikku was a wife. Later on, a mother, and, if she lived, she'd be a grandmother. And then…who knew? Who can say?
No matter what happened next, even if the sweet dreams of rainbows and butterflies and chocolate-chip cookies withstood the test of life and time, and remained for the rest of her life, the letters were now gone.
The correspondence ended, and with that, one hauntingly bittersweet secret between two hearts would now, at least in this life, be forever sealed.
FIN part 4
Author's Note:
And so ends "Correspondence". I know it may have focused a bit too heavily on Sesera, but the reason I did not let Rikku speak face-to-face with Auron is because 'what could have been' is more beautiful in memory.
Thanks to all my reviewers, and remember that though this story is now ended, there are many more to be told. So keep on reading. Cheers to all.
Kairos27