Journey 8
"Should've know this is where you'd take me" He laughs kicking up sand as he walks behind me towards the water. Only a sliver of light remains as the sun slowly descends. The air is clean, and bites at my skin, carrying grains of sand.
"Where else would I want to be?" I ask softly, turning to wait for him, stopping to watch as he discards his shoes, dropping them carelessly.
"To tell you the truth, I'm a bit relieved." He grins, walking to me. He stops and takes a deep breath, his chest and shoulders doubling in size. I breath with him, smiling, feeling calmed by our peaceful surroundings. We stand for a moment, just looking at each other, the wind flattening my hair to one side, before he walks past me out to the water. I turn and watch as he stops at the tide line, and begins to slip off his shirt.
"Whoa…what are you doing?" I walk to him, shaking my head. He drops his shirt in the sand and looks at me with a confused smirk.
"Swimming" He offers like I'm dumb for asking. I shake my head again, looking down, but catching a nice glance at his toned upper body.
"The water is freezing right now…. you'll die" I tell him flatly. He laughs deeply, licking his lips, and I see his hands move to his belt, whipping the leather strap from the buckle.
"And whoa…. whoa…. are you taking off your pants?" I turn around quickly, flushing from embarrassment, looking up at the sky, my body tensing.
"Yes…. yes I am" He muses, and I can hear his zipper fly down, and the soft thud of his pants hitting the sand. This is all moving a little too quickly. I can barely look him in the eye with out turning red, and now he expects me to carry on while he stands there in his under wear…if he even has underwear on.
"Have you lost your mind!?" I whip back around and almost loose balance upon seeing a mass of hard skin, and I'm more than tempted to look down, but I know my sanity depends on me keeping my eyes as far north as possible.
"No" He whispers taking a small step towards me. I can feel my chest begin to burn with anxious, curious energy, and my stomach tries to flee to my throat.
"We can take a little cold water…right?" He reaches out and grabs my hand giving is a small squeeze. The world as I know stands still for a moment as my brain tries to stay solid after registering all that's happening. I exhale a small breath, looking into his eyes. My ears begin to burn again, as my skin goes feverishly hot.
"I promise to keep you warm" He adds, after not hearing an answer, leaning in closer to my ear for a moment. He looks down searching my face with a hopeful smile, oblivious to the meltdown going on inside me. The seconds worth of warmth from his breath paralyzes me, rendering me unable to speak, think, breath. I close my eyes, begging my body to work.
"Ok…but if we die…I'll ask God to send you back as plankton" I whisper finally finding some strength. I open my eyes just in time to see him smiling at me.
"Fair enough" He nods, stepping back a little.
"I'll even turn around while you get undressed" He winks grinning broadly. He turns away from me, and I sigh telling myself it's all going to be okay. I slowly slip my shirt over my head, noting how amazingly wide and smooth his back is, as he swings his arms back and forth lazily. I take off my sandals and toss them behind me. I try to steady my shaking hands to unbutton my jeans, suddenly feeling very self-conscious. Taking in a deep breath I push them down my legs as quietly as possible watching him the whole time to make sure his eyes stay forward.
"Ready?" He asks, obviously hearing my jeans fall, and slowly begins to turn around.
"No!" I yell panicked, putting a hand out against his back, and covering what I can with the other. He freezes but turns his head back to the water, his body language conveying confusion.
"Umm….umm…let's…stay facing that way….and walk forward" "I try to think of a plan to get me to the water unseen.
"Oookaaay." He draws, tilting his head to the side, still very confused. He begins walking, and I keep my hand on his back, staying close. We finally reach the frigid water, as it swirls around our knees and he stops.
"Are you oka…" He begins to turn around again, and I wince, scooting up behind him, now flush with his back effectively stopping him from turning around. Holy fuck, he is solid. I can feel him relax and he cranes his neck to look at me. Huddled against him holding his shoulders, I smack on a smile of embarrassment looking back up at him.
"You okay?" He raises an eyebrow, and I can tell he's hiding laughter. He has definitely figured out my plan.
"Great….but let's go in a little deeper….there are umm….fish….biting fish in the shallow waters" I spurt, nodding. He doesn't believe me, but he's nice enough to just play along.
"Better?" He asks, as we now float a few hundred feet from shore. I break away from him, being sure to keep everything below my shoulder under water. His arms float out to his sides, as he turns to face me. I can feel his legs steadily treading, the current pushing at my body gently.
"Yes" I say quietly, before letting my head slip below the water for a moment then reemerging, shivering a bit and wiping my eyes. The breeze that flows right above water is always crisp, and with a wet head, everything feels even clearer. Like my mind is so alert and unobstructed it's almost surreal. The sky is dark indigo now. Houses lining the shore down from where we are and the glowing moon are our only light. He dips below, coming up with a sheet of water sliding down his face past his smile.
"This is not too bad right?" He laughs, bringing a hand to out of the water. He shakes it behind him to dry it a little before wiping excess water from his eyes. Still, when he opens them, they are red from the salty water.
"Sure…but when shock sets in you'll be whistling a different tune." I laugh, looking into his poor bloodshot eyes, as he blinks rapidly. His eyelashes cling together in groups; water droplets perched on the ends of them. I begin to shiver visibly, wanting to hug myself, but needing to keep afloat.
"You okay?" His voice comes out as a whisper, moving closer to me. I revel in the small bit of warmth that was expelled from his mouth nodding, and flapping my arms slowly at my sides. He starts moving again leaving only a few inches between us. Although apprehensive, I'm thankful for the small amount of heat being given off. This moment is what I would kill for. Being so close to someone so beautiful, and so strong. Why can't I let myself enjoy it? Why do I always think the worst? It's become more than a defense mechanism, it's a burden. He's searching my face for something. He's so close now, if I breathe in deep enough, our chests will make contact.
"Yeah" My voice is breathy and hoarse, the cold setting in. He continues to search, and I can see his hand emerge from the water with a blue tint, dripping and slowly coming towards my face. His fingers are cold, yet his touch still it melts my confidence. I tense immediately, drawing in a quick breath through my nostrils and slamming my eyes shut. I can feel his fingertips retract without hesitation. I keep my eyes close for a moment, almost hoping he'll put his hand back despite my unconscious rejection. When it doesn't come, I open them again with a heavy heart to see him looking past me at the shore.
"I'll race you…" He says suddenly in a low firm tone. I turn my body and push my arms forward to float beside him, looking at the shore.
"I'll race you to the car" He adds, turning his head to look at me, an unreadable mood plaguing his features. I stare back at him, my defenses instantly going back up, with a calm measured glare.
"When I win, what do I get?" I raise an eyebrow at him, slowing down my arms to conserve energy.
"Whoever wins…" He's sure to emphasize that it's anyone's race.
"Chooses their prize" His eyes fall and run over my face before looking back at the beach.
"The first to gather their clothes and touch the car…wins" He raises an eyebrow back, in a challenging tone, and extends his hand form the water. I nod and shake it, readying myself for a race I can't afford to lose.
"Ready?" He smiles faintly, in a mocking tone, and I nod at him. For seconds, I can feel him staring at my head, and all I can hear is our breathing.
"Go" He whispers, and we both shoot forward into motion. Getting in a rhythm with my breathing and strokes, I don't realize that there's no one beside me. I don't remember him passing me, and unless he knows a shortcut through the ocean bottom, I'm not loosing this one. Reaching shallow water, I stand only to be nearly knocked over by the breeze hitting my wet body. Goose bumps spread like wild fire over my skin, and my nipples become taught. Panting from exhaustion, I stand for a second over my clothes, struggling with my lungs, before picking them up and walking tiredly to the car and throwing them on the hood. I'm positive there's an immense amount of saltwater irritating them by now. My nostrils burn along with my eyes. I place my palms on the hood and stand, my head hung, gulping mouthfuls of air, still freezing, but too exhausted to put my clothes on just yet. My muscles feel like they could ignite my skin at any second.
"You're fast…" I can hear more labored breathing behind me.
"You let me win," I say quickly between gulps.
"Maybe…but I'm definitely the winner here…this is the best view I've seen all night" I can here his laughter brewing under the surface, and am immediately compelled to get dressed, no matter what my muscles say. I grab my clothes and walk quickly to the back of the car with a hand splayed across my ass.
"No need to hide…I've seen it all now" He peeks behind the corner, as I scoot further over giving him a glare of spite.
"Weasel…rat…CHEATER!" I yell sneering, tugging my clothes over wet clammy skin. Smoothing my hair back, I walk back to the front of the car.
"Forgive me?" He smiles, that damn dazzling smile that makes me want to fall at his feet. Much better than that cold displaced look he was throwing me earlier. Without thinking I begin to apologize for brushing him off and trying to explain.
"I'm sorry about tonight. I like you…I do…I just can't make myself stop questioning your motives" I confess. Where that came from, I'll never know.
"Then why don't you ask me what they are?" He states looking me in the eye, all humor gone. He breaks eye contact to pull on a wife beater he grabbed from the car. I fold my arms across my chest to hide the evidence of how cold I am.
"What are your motives? Why are you doing this? Why are you leading me on?" I keep my eyes level with his. No use for aversion now, it's all out there, no turning back. I take a deep breathe and wait for his answer, wait for him to reject me, wait for him to call me cynical and cold, wait for him to tell me the truth. Either way, I'll at least learn something.
"Why do you assume so much?" He starts, sitting on the hood of the car shaking his head. I remain silent. He takes my silence, and sighs, continuing.
"My motives were…are innocent. You seemed…seem like a nice person, into cars, fun to be around…is it a crime to be interested in someone similar to you?" He asks, an annoyed look on his face.
"This is my prize…I ask the questions…you answer them" I state, walking to sit on the hood beside him. He scoots closer, no doubt to see how far he can push me.
"Go on" I nod my head once smiling. He shakes his head and grins.
"I'm doing this…because I like you…I want to spend time with you…I wan to know more about you…" He stares intently at the side of my head, as I take in everything. His voice is steady, no jovial wavering that would signal humor. He is telling the truth. Oh god.
"And…I am not leading you on…every action, every word…every touch…is earnest Jamie" His voice trails from hard to soft, concerned, and sincere. Oh god. I turn to look at him, the pessimist in me praying that he's hiding a laugh…a smile…crossed fingers…anything. He's looking dead at me when my eyes meet his, his smoldering stare quieting all my insecurities. I swallow hard and push the lump back long enough to whisper one last question.
"And what would your prize have been…had you won?" He smiles for a second hearing my question, before leaning closer to me. The next thing I feel is his downy lips gently pushing, slightly sucking at mine. My mind quickly begins debating the pros and cons, before my body shuts them up, expelling a soft moan inside my mouth. The heat of his face is scorching and completely erotic, as his lips begin move away. I open my eyes, feeling somehow colder.
"I'm sorry…" He stares at me with an apologetic gaze, licking his lips. I don't know why my confidence is surging again, but I'm sure it's from tasting his lips. Without thinking, because thinking never got me this far, I plaster my lips again to his, and his hands fly to my waist to keep us from rocking. Taking the chance to open my mouth this time, he doesn't let me down, and my lower stomach bursts into flip-flops feeling his tongue slither into my mouth. My whole body reacts, pressing closer to him, becoming heated, and sensitive to every single touch. His mouth is roasting and damp, his lips slowly sucking at mine. And as quickly as it started, it's over. No good kiss is ever long enough.
"I wasn't expecting that…", He swallows, still holding my waist, blinking rapidly.
"You assume too much" I echo his words, still longing for another kiss. He rewards me with a smile, and a quick kiss, pulling back with a smacking noise. I stare at him for a long moment, trying to still my mind, trying my best to just let it be.
"So what happens now?" I ask him, with a sad smile, needing to know desperately.
"Whatever you want" He takes my hand in his, showing me with his eyes that he's game if I am.