Chapter VII: A Bad End

The full moon was three days later. I went down to the Shrieking Shack as usual, and transformed. About five minutes later a rat came in and squeaked loudly. Then came a dog, then a deer. Do not eat, my wolf's mind thought. The deer herded me out, and we ran in the forest like the animals we were. Peter was the scout, and Sirius and James kept me in line. We saw a herd of centaurs and almost got shot, but escaped like we always have. I was barely made it to the shack by dawn to turn back, but it was worth the close shaves. In the morning I healed the Marauders because I felt a little guilty, and not at all deserving the badge I wore.

Lia and I were officially a couple now, and every Hogsmeade weekend I saved a few hours for her. Sirius turned his hair blue to match his tattoos, and got a few weird girls for it. Snape almost killed James in a duel and got a hundred points off for it, and James repaid him by flipping him upside-down for half the girls in school. Lily was not impressed. Life went on as usual.

A foot of snow into December, Lia and I were walking back to school when Lily went past, followed by a deer, and a couple hundred yards later Peter and Sirius. The deer slid to a stop in front of us, then slunk into an alley. James came out of the alley, and Lia looked suspiciously at him, then went into the alley and looked at the ground. She shook her head and came back out.

"You should be more careful, James," she scolded. "A deer walked in, but a man walked out, to see the footprints. It is illegal, you know." James smiled sheepishly and covered the tracks.

"Nice going," Sirius commented acidly.

"What were you doing, anyway?" I asked.

James looked at Lia. "You know Lily Evans?"

"Yeah. She's my roommate." Lia sighed. "I'll talk to her, James. I don't like your chances though. Meet you at breakfast." We went back to the castle, and James looked a little blue.

The next day at breakfast Lia came in and immediately hunted us down. She stood behind us, and we all turned around.

"What does she say?" James asked, his eyes shining.

Lia bit her tongue and fidgeted like a little girl who has been pushed on stage. "She said, 'I don't go out with jerks,'" Lia recited as quickly as she could.

"No!"

"Yes." She took a deep breath like she was going to cry. "I'm sorry, James, but what can I do?" She kissed me quickly and ran.

We found James fifteen minutes later torturing spiders in a secret passage. We took and illegal trip to Hogsmeade for him, and I felt very guilty about it, but so be it.

We all got all our O.W.L.s above an A (Peter only because we let him cheat), and I had an E average, but didn't mention it. Sirius' dad used the Cruciatus Curse on him over the summer, and he moved to James' house. I was given strict instructions not to tell, and I felt very bad about it. Mom gave me hours of advice on what to do about a girlfriend, which made me blush. In sixth year, life was as it had always been, except that Filch confiscated the Marauders' Map. Peter had the bright idea of summoning it, but that didn't work, and we never found it before old drip-nose came back, so we flirted with expulsion with our backs open. On our more dangerous expeditions Wormtail would keep a rearguard, but it wasn't quite the same. There were whisperings in the papers of a Lord Voldemort, and the Death Eaters. They blackmailed, tortured, or killed at night those who opposed them, and left their bodies and ruined houses with skulls of green stars floating over them. (A/N: LOTR RULES! So does Sauron.) That was all worth repeating.

Seventh year was blissfully dull until the dead, cold middle of February. We were in Charms. We had just gotten our wands out when Dumbledore came in.

"Frederick," he said with his usual absolute authority, "I need to see Mr. Lupin. I do not expect him to return to classes for a day or so." Flitwick licked his lips. "It's urgent."

"Yes, Professor," he conceded. "Go on, Mr. Lupin."

The Marauders gave me questioning looks. I shrugged. I didn't know what was coming. I followed Dumbledore to his office.

"Sit," he commanded. He sounded a little sad. I sat. "Here." He handed me a letter. "I'm sorry, dear boy."

I read, my hands shaking slightly.

Dear Professor Dumbledore,

We have received intelligence that the Dark Lord, or more probably, the Death Eaters, have committed another crime.

I knew, unfortunately, who the Death Eaters were. I wondered what they had to do with me that was so horrible.

We were alerted by our Magical Act Alarm System (MAAS) that the house of 15 Hidden Lane, Lincoln had been destroyed by magical force.

I read that again, to make sure it was really there. That was my house.

The Department of Magical Catastrophes immediately sent a hit squad to the site. The team reported that the house had indeed been magically destroyed, and that its residents, Karen and Marcus Lupin, had been killed.

Killed.

Killed.

"No," I whispered. I seemed to hear my voice from a long way off. Dumbledore wearily took his glasses off. "No, Professor, it can't be!" He nodded once. It was all I didn't need. I started crying, sobbing uncontrollably. I ran out of the office. The letter fluttered to the floor behind me.

Killed.

I ran out to the lake, barely looking where I was going. I ran out up to my waist and stood there. I screamed. I threw rocks. I saw students looking out the windows at me, but they might as well not have been there. There was nothing but me and the icy lake. After a few minutes I realized I was shaking like a bead in a rattle. I splashed out and ran back to the castle.

Killed.

I sat on my bed and cried. There was nothing to convince me not to do that, so that is what I did. Poets call it a spear in one's heart. That fell nothing short of the mark. I hated absolutely everything. I hated Dumbledore, Hogwarts, werewolves, but especially the Death Eaters and Voldemort. I think that it was then that I resolved to be an auror, even though I never did succeed in doing that.

Killed.

I banged my head on the headboard to try to make that killed go away.

Killed.

Killed.

A while later the Marauders came in. Sirius and Peter sat on my bed and James sat on his bed in front of me.

"What's up, Moony?" James asked.

"M-my parents."

"What about your parents?"

I looked at them. They looked at me. I dropped my head onto my hands. "They're dead. Killed."

Killed.

"Oh, God. Who?"

Voldemort," I whispered like it was a curse. And it was.

Killed.

A/N: Sorry, but there's worse to come. If you cry easily, quit now. You have been warned. Please review.