AN: Lalala nothing to say o.O; Except that the flame I got on this was terribly amusing XD
Posted: Dec. 10, 2004


Moments Of Life
Part Five

Shuichi lightly traced a finger over Yuki's parted lips, watching the play of moonlight over his lover's face as he let his mind replay the events from earlier that evening. He'd noticed differences in the way Yuki had been treating him lately and he still wasn't exactly sure what had brought it on, but he supposed it was their changing relationship. At first he had thought nothing of it, figuring it was just a sign that he'd managed to get that much closer to the other man, but he knew now that was only partly true; knew that Yuki had in fact been working up to telling him everything.

His heart still ached from the way Yuki had looked when telling him. It had been different from the time when the man had first talked about his past with him, after taking him on that date and showing him the picture afterwards while they stood looking out at the ocean. Then Yuki had spoken so nonchalantly, so carelessly about it, it hadn't seemed real. This time the novelist had started from the beginning, telling Shuichi everything that had lead up to that event and what he'd gone through.

There had been no tears, but the distant look in Yuki's eyes as he'd talked had frightened the vocalist enough that he hadn't been able to bring himself to touch his lover at all until he'd finished; partly afraid that doing so would cause the older man to stop. So he'd listened silently, letting Yuki's words fill in the gaps and let him understand the novelist that much more.

Afterwards they'd sat in silence for a long while, Shuichi nestled in the corner of the couch with Yuki's head settled on his lap. "I won't leave you... I won't use you like he did..." he'd said softly, brushing his fingers through his lover's blond hair in a continuous motion.

"Shut up, brat..." was the murmured reply, as the older man's eyes closed briefly before he had pushed himself up and headed to his office.

Shuichi sighed softly and trailed feather-light touches over the sleeping blond's cheek before brushing his bangs back. Could he promise something like that? It wasn't that he had any doubts about his feelings for Yuki, it was just sometimes... it felt like they were fighting an uphill battle, and half the time he was dragging the novelist behind him. He knew Yuki loved him, even if the author was still trying to deny it, but once in a while, he just wanted to hear the words; to be told straight forwardly that he wasn't just living a dream and making an absolute fool of himself thinking he was wanted there... But they'd made it this far, hadn't they? They'd had some rough times, the typical bumps on the road, but nothing major enough that they hadn't been able to come through.

Maybe what they needed now was another change. Yuki had finally let Shuichi through the door to his past, even if it was for just a few moments. What mattered is that he'd done it on his own; the singer had ceased asking about or mentioning the author's past some time ago.

The younger male shifted and nestled his head on his lover's shoulder. He'd been meaning to start calling Yuki by his real name for a while now; maybe this was his chance to do so.

"I'm not going to leave you until you throw me out the window, Eiri..." he whispered, pressing his lips against the blond's shoulder before closing his eyes.