Author's Note: Hi there! Lil here! Hope you are all having a nice winter, we've got lots of snow here! Actually, it's a blizzard! Unfortunately, I have a cold and can't go out and play in it, darn! That is why I am sitting here, writingfanfiction that probably won't even be read by anyone.Please review, as this is the first HP fic I've posted, though not the first written. I hope you enjoy it! Oh, and go check out my other stories too, they're quite entertaining, I'm told! Especially the Cheesy Game Show, WHAT'S IN GIMLI'S BEARD? Now on with the story!
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters from Harry Potter, I am just borrowing them and plan to return them soon, except Snape, 'cause he's my muse! I'm gonna keep him, but SHHHHH, don't tell anyone! The song (initalics)is Little Red Riding Hood, sung by Sam the Sham and the Pharoes, so I don't own it either! I just changed it to fit the story. If you've never heard it, go download it, it's great!
Little Red Hermione Hood
Little Red Hermione Hood is walking through the dark and spooky forest on her way to her grandmother's house. She is taking her a large basket full of chocolates, how lovely! Little does she know that a certain Big Bad Chocolate-Loving Werewolf is in these very woods!
Big Bad Remus Wolf looks around a tree and sees Little Red Hermione Hood skipping merrily down the dark and spooky path, whistling happily.
Aoooooooooo!
Who's that I see walking in these woods?
Why it's Little Red Hermione Hood!
He notices the basket of goodies she has, and comes up to her, poorly disguised as a sheep, andresolved to get some of that chocolate! He starts to sing!
Hey there Little Red Hermionne Hood,
Those chocolates sure smell good!
They're everything a Big Bad Wolf could want!
Listen to me,
Little Red Hermione Hood,
I don't think little big girls should,
Go walking in these spooky old woods alone!
He starts walking beside her, still dressed as the sheep, and continues singing. Apparently she does not find anything odd about a singing sheep with a head, arms, legs, and a tail that stick out of the costume, and are very obviously not sheep body parts.
Aoooooooooo!
What a big basket you have!
That kind of chocolate will drive wolves mad!
So just to see that you don't get chased,
I think I ought to walk with you for a ways!
What a lot of sweets you have,
They're sure to lure someone bad!
So until you get to Grandma's place,
I think you ought to walk with me and be safe!
I'm gonna keep my sheep suit on,
'Til I'm sure you've been shown,
That I can be trusted walkin' with you alone.
Big Bad Remus Wolf is still walking, and singing, and Little Red Hermione Hood still notices nothing wrong. She does not see him leaning closer and closer to the basket of chocolates. When she turns to look at him, however, he sticks his hands in his pockets and very unsuspiciously starts looking at a tree. How clever, aside from the fact that sheep do not have pockets.
Aoooooooooo!
Little Red Hermione Hood,
I'd like to eat the chocolate if I could,
But you might think I'm a Big Bad Wolf, so I won't!
Aoooooooooo!
What a big mouth I have,
The better to eat sweets with!
Little Red Hermione Hood,
Even Bad Wolves can be good!
They are nearing the clearing in the dark and spooky forest where Little Red Hermione Hood's grandmother lives, and Big Bad Remus Wolf is desperate to get some chocolate before they get there! She is still as dumb as a post and apparently has not heard a word he has been singing, and she still has not noticed that he is not a sheep. If he was, he'd be a rather ugly sheep indeed.
I'll try to keep satisfied,
Just to walk close by you're side.
Maybe you'll see things my way,
Before we get to Grandma's place!
Little Red Hermione Hood,
Those chocolates sure smell good,
They're everything a Big Bad Wolf could want!
Aoooooooooo!
She looks at him, and it seems that she has finally gotten some brains and realized that he is a Big Bad Chocolate-Loving Werewolf! He corrects his mistake by trying to act like a sheep again, dropping down on all fours and Baa-ing!
I mean Baa!
Baa!
Baa!
She turns to him and looks at the basket in her hand. "Oh, you want some chocolate, Mr. Sheep?", she asks him. WhenBig Bad Remus Wolfnods excitedly, she pats him on the costumed head. "That's too bad," she says, "Chocolate isn't good for sheep! It gives them indigestion!"
Big Bad Remus Wolf just sits there, shocked at how stupid this girl is! He is at the point of just running up to her and taking them, but just then she arrives at her grandmother's happy little cottage, and the chocolates are beyond his grasp. He is sad, and walks back down the path, still disguised as a very ugly sheep.
He is feeling most depressed, that is until he notices Little Red Ginny Hood walking through the woods with a thermos of hot cocoa!
Aoooooooooo!
Hey there, Little Red Ginny Hood,
That cocoa sure smells good,
It's everything a Big Bad Wolf could want!