Disclaimer: How can you expect people in their right minds to not see between the cracks and notice that there's something missing?
The Headmaster of St. Bartelby's stepped up to the podium and cleared his throat a few times before loosening his tie. "Thank you all for coming. This week was supposed to be an enjoyable one, when we could interact with our sister school, St. Mary-Catherine's...but recent events have cast a shadow over our meeting." The room slowly fell silent, all conversations halting. What was he talking about? "We just received word an hour ago about a terrible tragedy...I am very sorry to say that St. Mary-Catherine's was just bombed by a group of people, whom we have yet to discover. All students and teachers who did not come on this outing were vaporized in the blast."
Somewhere to Artemis's right, a girl began sobbing loudly, quickly joined by the others. "This is a hard time for all of us, but we have to stick together...and I'm sorry to say that Mary Catherine's may only be the first in a group of attacks. Until Interpol can sort this out, we are initiating a lock down on the premises. No one will be allowed to enter or leave. We are already taking preventative steps to ensure that St. Bartelby's does not suffer the same fate." For a moment, he was silenced by a fresh round of weeping from the St. Mary's side of the room. Artemis turned his head towards their group of no more than fifty students and felt a powerful wave of sympathy wash over him. He wasn't one to tolerate unnecessary emotion, but this was a tragedy indeed. Grief for the beloved dead was not something he would frown upon too harshly. "Fortunately for us, Mary-Catherine's new grief counselor, Dr. Gatling, flew in with their little group. If anyone needs to talk about this, you can sign out of class and talk for however long you need. In the meantime, he would like to say a few words."
Dr. Gatling, a diminutive man, stepped up to the microphone and gave it a peremptory tap before clearing his throat and beginning, "This is a terrible time, for all of us. I assure you that my heart aches with yours for the losses of our friends, families, and co-workers. We must pull together in our time of need! However, we must also take certain steps to prevent the same thing from happening here. As your kind headmaster already stated, we will be imposing a lockdown. I'm afraid that I must also add a few regulations for everyone's safety. All phone usage is hereby banned, as well as the use of chat rooms and e-mails. If the killers are indeed at St. Bartelby's, we must not let them communicate and warn their accomplices. Students will be accompanied everywhere by a teacher or a designated guide. You must be in class, with a teacher, or in your dorm rooms at all times. No exceptions."
Artemis' eyes narrowed sharply. Although the new rules made sense, they were also very offputting and suspicious. E-mails and phone calls he could understand, but chat rooms? A complete lockdown? Escorts to classes? What were they, kindergardeners? Artemis supposed it was logical, but he was leery of being cut off from the outside world...ah well, if the need arose, he could simply disregard the rules, as usual. Trevor, Artemis noticed, was looking rather annoyed but still very fascinated with a particularly broken-hearted brunette across the aisle. "Trevor," Artemis sneered, "If your jaw hangs open any further, you are likely to swallow countless flies, along with your little love interest."
Artemis was strangely talkative(compared to normally) when Trevor was around...the pathetic boy left himself open for all sorts of insults and psychological attacks. Perhaps he would eventually learn not to let his guard down around Artemis Fowl I I. Trevor tossed him a lazily cocky glance, "You're just jealous 'cause I can get any girl in this room, and you can't even snag a virtual gal." Artemis sniffed loudly to show just how ridiculous that statement was.
"If I were interested in any sort of female, I would undoubtedly be bothered by your bravado. But, as it is, I am content to maintain my status as a genius and mock your status as a perverted lowlife who has nothing better to do with his time than drool over a mourning girl." Trevor shut up. Apparently Dr. Gatling had finally finished his little speech, for the stage was empty, and the auditorium was rapidly attaining that status as well. Artemis rose to his feet and made his way out of the area, intent on returning to his dorm and possibly picking up a bit of extra caviar on the way.
On his way back from the lunch room, Artemis walked past several knots of girls silently weeping together, trying to comfort each other while crying salty tears of their own. More than once, he had nearly collided with a grieving student rushing headlong through the halls, blinded by their tears. To be honest, it was getting annoying. He turned his head to more important matters...for instance, how to get around the new rules and regulations? Ah, what an easy problem. Artemis smiled vampirically as he remembered his stash of transistor, CB, and normal radios as well as his long distance walkie-talkies. Those poor fools had no idea how stupid they were being when it came to trying to hedge Artemis Fowl in with their petty little rules...
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Please R&R and let me know what you think. I hope you all enjoy!