Origin: Magic Knight Rayearth
Disclaimer: All CLAMP's, not mine. The characters and MKR are property of those ladies, not Starflower-girl's. I really don't have the time or energy to fight in court right now, so just listen to me when I say: Not my characters, not my MKR.
Genre:
for the trilogy – romance & angst
for the third chapter – angst, romance, drama, implied yaoi
Rating: PG-13
For this third chapter, I have reserved the right to load the story with homosexual romance content. I warned you about it in the first chapter already. And hence, do not read it unless you're cool with it. I didn't make it graphic or anything, mostly implied.
Author's notes and summary: Okay so I've never posted a MKR fic. It's one of those strange stories you just have to write to the end, even if you know it's not a real jewel. This is indeed a trilogy type of fic, and each part deals with one magic knight. This one, Hikaru. The main idea is that this is a romance fic, pairings are UxC, FxF, HxL – do not read this one if you don't like any kind of yaoi stuff. Implied and maybe more than that..LxE in the third chapter. Storyline-wise, well, I took a few liberties here... It's after MKR ends, but you might find the timing somewhat odd. All I can say is that it's the whole point here... Everything is supposed to be mixed up. But read and review it, let me know how you felt. Okay that was a lot of ranting over nothing, but just – enjoy it if you can. Also, this chapter ties most of the loose ends. It's non-action, drama. Some repetition of the second chapter, in a different light.
For my reviewers: Right on! I got flamed! For making the second chapter cruel and just plain "wrong", I got flamed. I, however, didn't find it a bad thing – it was actually very interesting for me. I guess I could defend myself here. So like I maybe should have mentioned earlier, I don't write to "torment the characters" or because I'm bored (actually I never write when I'm bored, the stories turn out very bad indeed at those times) – I write for my own reasons, sure, but this fic is all about exploring the area and finding the limits of my potential. You said Ferio couldn't be that cruel, that Fuu couldn't be unhappy. True. Fuu, however, was in a pretty horrifying situation and Ferio made the mistake of not pushing her into talking about it early enough. Ferio wasn't cruel, actually, which I will now try to prove with this last chapter. I will try my best to let you know what Ferio was actually thinking, I guess, and sorry for not doing that sooner. It was my intention to solve the situation in this part from the start – just like with Clef's situation was (hopefully) cleared up in the second chapter.
Oh and: At the end of this chapter, there will be a short summary of what happened in this three-part story. It shouldn't be needed, but I'll put it up in case you're either not wanting to read this due to its light yaoi content and so, OR you just simply want to see it for clarification. So go there or read this. I hope you choose to read, but then again, who knows.
-- To Have And To Hold Trilogy – The One For You --
by Starflow
---
The phone rang and rang. Nobody to pick it up, realised she. Putting the thing down, she left the house, and out on the street she found herself shivering in the cold. She took the shortest route, with a bad feeling about this in her heart. It wasn't until she had rang the doorbell that she stopped to think about the fact that she was wearing jeans and an informal T-shirt. Not the best possible attire for visiting a somewhat rich friend's house late at night.
"Why hello, Shidou-san. Umi is in her room... It is relatively late already..."
Hikaru followed the woman inside, and up the stairs. She opened the door, bashing in, and she soon wished that she hadn't done it.
Umi was sitting in the window, looking so sad, so empty, that Hikaru's heart hurt. She closed the door behind her and took a few steps. The blue-haired girl turned to look at her with those tired-looking eyes and asked:
"Do you think it's possible to live on, after losing something you had even though you couldn't grasp it?"
Hikaru just walked up to her friend and hugged her. She stood there for a long time, holding Umi. This was just so wrong. Why was it that everything was in such a chaotic state?
"Umi-chan", said Hikaru after a while, forcing herself to talk about why she had come here. "Have you heard anything of Fuu-chan lately?"
"Lately", repeated Umi, blinking. "Not since that morning, no."
It had been a long time since that morning. Several days, maybe a week even. Nobody had seen Fuu since, and Hikaru had woken up in the middle of the night now. She'd had a terrible nightmare, in which Fuu had been calling out to her friends for help. Phoning the girl in the middle of the night, Hikaru had needed confirmation that it was only a silly dream. And now, she knew it wasn't just that.
"So what you're saying is", sighed Umi, looking outside, "that Fuu is really missing. And that you think she might be in trouble... Hikaru, I want to help her too, but if you don't know more than this, I doubt there's anything we can do."
"But Umi-chan –"
"We both know she's gone to Cephiro. If she is missing, she has to be in Cephiro. Ferio is there for her, she'll be okay", Umi went on and added before falling silent: "If you find a way to go back, Hikaru... Take me with you."
---
Shidou Hikaru didn't really know why she had this kind of awful feeling about Fuu's whereabouts. A year had passed, a whole year. Fuu's family had given up hope, Umi was a mere shadow of what she used to be. Hikaru felt like she was all alone, lonely, out of energy.
Of course, in one year a lot can happen. She'd gone through with her transformation, becoming much more mature. Fuu had said she should, after all, and if Fuu had been able to go back – so should Hikaru be. Umi would surely come with her, and maybe that could lift her spirits too. The three of them together again, in Cephiro, the place they all loved. With the people they loved.
Lantis, realised Hikaru, might look totally different now. She didn't know how much time had passed. Hikaru closed her eyes and let her imagination take over. Maybe Lantis had changed, but she would surely recognise him. He was, after all, her first love. It sounded so absurd when she thought about it, rationally – and yet somehow so incredibly right.
"Hikaru!"
She was certain it was him. Her heart stopped at first, and then it started racing like mad. She greeted him, and as she was about to ask how Lantis had found her – he interrupted her, sounding upset:
"Can you find Umi and go to the place where the link is?"
---
As they finally emerged in the middle of the big hall, the girls were both somewhat scared. The look on Lantis's face wasn't exactly soothing, and his voice was hesitative, upset:
"Follow me and please refrain from asking anything just yet."
They reached the room rather quickly, and Lantis stopped at the door. He told them to go in, and that he would not accompany them – and so, Hikaru pulled the door open. Presea was the first sight – she was leaving the room, carrying something, saying she'd be back soon and that the girls could go in. The second thing to come to Hikaru's mind was that this was the room of someone dying.
Ferio was on his knees, on the floor next to the bed, with blood on his white clothes. His fingers were spasmodically squeezing the hand of another person, the skinny figure of Fuu on the bed. There was some undefined tension in the air, as if there was something the girls should have been aware of, to fully understand.
"...Hikaru-san", wheezed Fuu immediately, seeing them, and added: "Umi-san..."
"Fuu", cried Umi, slamming her hand over her mouth in shock. She just stood there, unable to speak, or even move. Hikaru herself felt a huge weight that had been on her shoulders due to Fuu's disappearance drop down and press on her heart. She took a few steps, stuttering:
"Fuu-chan... How... Why are you... What is..."
This was when she heard Ferio break down and cry. He pulled Fuu's hand against his forehead and cried. Hikaru was about to turn to him, ask him what was wrong, but he shook her off and Fuu spoke, silently:
"...You can ask... Ask Lantis..." Fuu then groaned and her face twisted in pain, which made her look extremely weak. Hikaru sat down on the edge of the bed, wiping her friend's forehead, and she suddenly realised there was blood everywhere. "I wanted to... Say farewell..." was Fuu able to add, and Umi slowly came to them as well, sitting next to Hikaru.
Fuu then spoke about how she had missed them. She said she was happy now, being able to see them again. Hikaru listened to her in shock, and that horrifying feeling of concern turned into plain hysteria. Nevertheless she let the girl go on, knowing that Fuu was sacrificing the last of her strength.
"Umi-san, Hikaru...san... Please, I want to..." Fuu coughed up some blood, and Hikaru passed her some water – she shook her head and said then, out of breath but sounding determined: "Please tell my family... Tell them that I was happy..."
In tears, Hikaru made that promise. Umi as well. Ferio, however, took a deep and husky breath. His face was striped with tears now.
"You... You say you were happy, but I –"
"Ferio", whispered Fuu with the last of her strength. The man looked into her eyes for the last time, and Hikaru and Umi sat there watching, charmed. "I will see the two of you... In the afterlife."
Ferio couldn't do anything. He couldn't say anything. And it was Fuu who ended the conversation by reminding him that she loved.
---
Hikaru stood there, watching as Ferio held the newborn child in his arms. Fuu's body was still there on the bed – she was pale, thin, weakened by some kind of terminal fatigue. Umi was crying against Hikaru's shoulder and the redhead let her own tears flow as well. Hikaru felt empty, so incredibly empty. Everything was a mess, and Fuu was no longer among them.
"You should get some rest", sighed Presea's voice nearby. Umi followed her lead and Hikaru, after a while, turned her back on the room too. She walked after the two, in silence. And then she saw Lantis.
He was sitting in the hallway, with his face buried in his hands. He had taken off the circlet he had had on his hair earlier on, it lay forgotten on the bench, next to him. Hikaru took a deep breath and went to him.
"Lantis – are you all right?"
"I never wanted this thing", said he, more to himself than to her. He was talking about the crown, obviously. "I never wanted it, and nothing I did with it was right."
"Lantis –"
The man didn't seem to notice her there. He just sat there, entwined in his own dark thoughts, and it made Hikaru's heart ache even more. She stood in front of him, helpless. That was when Eagle appeared behind her and quietly said:
"Get some rest, Hikaru... I will look after him..."
Gratefully she nodded. Eagle seemed tired and she could see that this man had been crying as well. Eagle marched to Lantis and firmly put his arms around the black-haired man, and Hikaru walked away – grieving, worried, upset.
---
She had no idea how long it had been since she'd been out of that room. One morning, a knock on the door made her return to reality, the fact that Fuu was gone.
"How are you holding up?" was Eagle's question, and Hikaru just embraced him. He kindly put his arms around her, letting her remain as silent as she wished.
"What happened, Eagle", was her final question. She felt him tense up. "What was it that made Fuu that way and brought this kind of horrible ending?"
"I couldn't say", replied Eagle in the end, letting go of Hikaru and directing his eyes at the floor. "I only know so little, and none of it is correct anyway... But you should ask Lantis, he knows all of it."
"Lantis?" Hikaru blinked, and the white-haired man nodded to repeat. "Why would Lantis..?"
"He happens to be the master mage of Cephiro nowadays", sighed Eagle with a faint smile of irony on his lips. "Whether he wants it or not..."
Hikaru stared at Eagle in surprise. He didn't say anything more, though, just repeated that Hikaru should ask Lantis. He then left her and went his own way. Hikaru decided to do exactly that. She went to see Umi, and after that she headed straight for the room where Lantis spent most of his days.
---
"Come on in, Hikaru."
She closed the door behind her, he offered her a seat. Looking at Lantis from the corner of her eye, Hikaru found herself admiring this man even now. Even under pressure and haunted by grief, Lantis looked majestic and beautiful.
Hikaru suddenly became aware of the awkward silence, as Lantis turned to look at her. His glance was friendly, even gentle, but the way his lips were tightly pressed together spoke of pain. Hikaru blinked and blushed, muttering an apology. The man sighed that it was nothing, and that Hikaru was probably here to ask about what had happened since Fuu returned to Cephiro.
"Yeah", admitted Hikaru, looking at Lantis. The man was indeed tired, everything about him said 'exhausted' to her. "Fuu-chan, she said you know what happened... And Eagle too."
Lantis shivered slightly. Mumbling something about Eagle failing in not getting involved, he started the story:
"When Fuu came back, it was me who brought her here. Master Clef had already left his position in my hands, for reasons I'm not allowed to say out loud. It is none of our business..."
"It had to be a major issue for him, whatever it was!" exclaimed Hikaru. "He who loved this land so much..."
"Just like the Princess, wouldn't you say?" Lantis gave a silent laugh and shook his troubled head. Returning to the story. "We all thought that they would live together forever, happy and free of troubles. Fuu and Ferio, I mean. They were so in love with each other... I'm sure you know all of it."
"Yeah", sighed Hikaru. It made her somewhat uncomfortable to talk to Lantis about this kind of thing.
"They married", Lantis went on. He took off his crown again, tracing the curve of its edge with his fingers while speaking. "The original mistake, as I would call it, took place on the night of their wedding." Lantis fell silent for a while, and Hikaru was pretty sure she knew what he was talking about. It made her feel even more uncomfortable, if possible. Lantis, however, didn't seem to mind and started talking again soon enough. "Ferio told me all of it. She was upset, and he didn't know how to react, eventually reacting wrongly. He let her suffer it alone, her confusion and fear, just as she wished. Her wish, however, was the exact opposite of what she said – in the end, she wanted him to force her into talking about it. Little by little, the misunderstanding grew... He would go back and forth between the right thing and her wish, wanting to make things better but unable to go through with it. Fuu was under the impression that he didn't care to talk about things with her, when all he really wanted was everything back the way it should be. Ferio was... Consumed by his hesitation."
"Are you saying, that Fuu thought he didn't love her anymore?" Hikaru's voice was thin and weak, and Lantis nodded. "You say it's a misunderstanding – to me it sounds like a nightmare."
"Yes", said he, sighing. "In the end, they were both cold towards each other. Fuu was obviously trying to imitate Ferio's seemingly emotionless behaviour, whereas Ferio was forced to go on with his original decision." Hikaru said nothing. Lantis asked her then: "Do you think it was wrong of me, keeping what he told me to myself, not letting her know?"
"I think Fuu might have gone either way if you had told her", answered Hikaru. "Things might have worked out... Or gotten worse."
"I thought I was obliged to keep my promise to Ferio. He told me all these things because he needed advice, and I gave him only one – to do what he found right. He tried to follow that advice... When Fuu wasn't there, he was always worried about her – when she was, he was unable to make a move on her, afraid that he would hurt her more. Her original plea, that he would not touch her as she put it, was what he got wrong. Ferio, he... Made sure Fuu wouldn't have to suffer anymore. He distanced himself from her, thinking that it was for the best, when all it did was made things worse. Fuu got sick. The stress and the fact that she was pregnant both added up to produce a fatal illness... Presea, among others, tried to ask me what it was that she suffered of, in addition to her already risky pregnancy – being so young and thin. She was afraid, too, afraid that if their marriage was to end, the child would suffer and not only her."
"Fuu was pregnant – if what you're saying is true, she had to go through all of it..."
"...alone, yes. Ferio stopped visiting her when she was awake, seeing as each time they met she got more upset. I told him to keep himself from visiting her, as well, actually – after seeing how bad things had gotten. At the same time I tried to make him see that there was nothing he could do anymore, that it was too late now. With the powers of master mage, powers I never asked for, I had seen it.... Fuu would die."
"Ferio and Fuu... They – they seemed to be in love when she died", whispered Hikaru. Lantis nodded again, and ended the story:
"That's because they finally argued about it... It was already too late. Fuu's condition was getting worse day by day, and she had lost faith in him. Ferio told me that the moment he asked her if she had regrets was one of the most painful moments in his life... He'd developed an extremely cold way of looking at her, along with a new way of speaking. It is confusing... But in the end it was all to respect her wishes and to hide his hesitation." Lantis let the crown drop on the floor and finally said: "Now, she is gone. He's stuck with a memento that will demand his attention for decades to come and remind him of her, and of his original mistake. And I am left blaming myself, knowing that I could have made a difference."
"You shouldn't be so hard on yourself", said Hikaru automatically. In reality, she didn't know if Lantis was to blame or not – neither did she care. She was too tired to think about who to blame. None of it would bring Fuu back. "Lantis, may I ask you something more?" He nodded, and she then blurted it out: "How could Ferio be so cold, if what you say is true and he never stopped loving Fuu?"
"Nothing is black and white as far as love goes", replied he, picking up the crown. He placed it on his hair again, and got up, walking to the window. "You should ask Ferio."
Hikaru left the room, thanking the man for his time. Lantis, turning to look at her, said nothing. Hikaru wondered if he had been talking about the two of them as well, when he had said that about love. Seeing him made her heart tremble, even at a moment like this. She knew he was looking after her, probably noticing her new look too.
---
Hikaru didn't really know how to start it. Fortunately for her, Ferio, who was standing near the ledge and with his back turned on the girl, said:
"The two of you may stay as long as you wish, but I do not think I'm very good company now."
"Ferio", began she, careful not to raise her voice too much. "I talked to Lantis, I know what happened between you and Fuu. I need to hear it from you. How..." Hikaru's voice faded, as she saw Ferio's shoulders drop a bit. She gathered her strength and asked the same question she had asked the master mage earlier on. "How could you be so cold to her, if you never stopped loving her?"
"What I did, I did for her", started he, sounding strangled. "I thought it was the only thing I could possibly do... Respecting her wish, or what I thought to be her wish, I left her alone. Slowly, I realised that my cold exterior was hurting her even more... But it was too late to go back. I tried, Hikaru, I tried to approach her. I guess my act of coldness had already became a mask that automatically hid my real face from her, whenever she was there. In the end, I asked her if she wanted to split up, you know... If she had regrets. I said we shouldn't have brought her back at all..." Ferio sobbed a bit, then took a deep breath and went on. "Fuu, she'd just... Cry. She cried, and so did I. The wall we'd put up was too high and thick to take down at that point. We tried, but it was too late... For that was the day she was destined to go."
Ferio turned around. He was holding the baby again. Its green hair was shimmering in the moonlight. Ferio himself had tears in his eyes again. Hikaru stared at him, unable to understand, yet wishing she could have told him to stop blaming himself.
"I should be the one gone", laughed he dryly, biting his lower lip. "Not Fuu. She left everything behind, in order to be with me, and what did I do? I was not there for her..."
Hikaru had no words for it. She simply walked up to the man, and took the baby to let him cry a bit. She then said to him:
"This little guy is what is left of her, Ferio. You should... You should take care of him."
"Yeah", was Ferio's final answer. He didn't say more. Taking the baby again, he refused to talk more. Hikaru let him be, after a while of standing there and wondering how things had gotten so bad.
---
Eagle turned around, hearing her footsteps.
"Hikaru... You look upset... What happened?"
"I talked to Lantis", replied she, taking the offered arm and letting the ex-commander lead her inside. "And to Ferio too."
"So you know everything now?" Eagle's question was answered by a nod and a heavy sigh. "I am sorry, Hikaru, for not having any words to offer for your consolation now..."
"Eagle... Tell me, how did things get so messed up? I just wanted that we could all come back here, happily together with everyone here..." Hikaru felt like her heart was about to collapse under the pressure. She wanted to turn back time.
"I don't know", said he. "I honestly do not know."
"Everything's just... So terribly wrong."
"In shambles, all of it", said he.
Hikaru was left wondering what he was talking about. Eagle led her inside and into the dining hall, where everyone but Ferio was waiting already. He would not appear at all that night.
---
Lantis got up, and with a hasty apology, Eagle rushed out after him.
"It's just us now, I guess", said Presea, looking at Hikaru and Umi. "I've been meaning to talk to you about something... But the truth is, I do not know how to start. Or what to think of it."
Neither Hikaru nor Umi answered. They turned their eyes up at her, though, to let her know they were listening.
"I found something that might interest you, especially Umi." Now, Umi looked at the woman, and Hikaru saw that this was about something very different – not about Fuu. "There was a letter for you, Umi. Clef left it behind... Before he... Disappeared."
"What did it say?"
Presea shook her head. She told Umi she didn't know. Nobody had been able to open the letter, seeing as it had Umi's name on it. The girls were both excited about this, but it seemed to Hikaru that Umi already knew.
"So where is it? Can I see it?"
Presea, leading them to the room where Clef had resided, told Umi to be careful with it – an envelope sealed with magic might be a problem even for its real recipient. The master smith then left them in the room, even though it was obvious that she would have liked to stay. Hikaru remembered that Presea had truly cared for Clef, maybe even enough to be in love with him.
Umi opened the envelope. It wasn't difficult for her, at all, and with a little flash of blue light the seal was broken. She looked at the first words on the paper and closed her eyes in shock. She passed it on to Hikaru, asking her:
"Could you read it aloud, silently, not asking questions? Read it to me, Hikaru, please... I cannot do it myself."
And so, Hikaru took the paper and tried to read without memorizing. She stumbled on the words, scarcely believing what it was he man had written.
"Dearest, most beautiful Umi. I have been seeking a way to be freed of this form of mine – this life, this responsibility... All of it. Even now I feel the shadow over me eating up my heart. I do not think... I am positive that I will not be able to carry out my duties as the master mage of Cephiro anymore. Recalling what tragedy Princess Emeraude brought with her, I cannot let Cephiro suffer another fall. I will use my last resort, transferring my powers to Lantis... As much as I fear that he will not be able to take the responsibility, I believe this to be the only way to keep Cephiro the way it is now. I cannot focus on Cephiro now, not with the duty I took upon me – protecting you from the pain. But don't think for a heartbeat, that you have any reason to blame yourself for my demise, Umi... If you're reading this, I'm certain you had to witness it. Please live on, Umi, and be at peace now. Now that you have read my will. I think I can be free now, free to love you from afar. I want you to live on and be happy. Forgive me."
For a while, there was a suffocating silence about. Hikaru swallowed, trying to forget what she had read, in order to be a friend to Umi. Miss Ryuuzaki, however, told her to leave just by taking the letter herself, rereading it.
Hikaru turned to look at her in the doorway. Umi was crying, yes... But she had a smile on her face.
---
It was cold outside.
Hikaru let her heart fly with the wind, thinking about her friends' horrible misfortunes and her own situation. She had pictured their return to Cephiro to be a happy moment, something wonderful. Now everything was, like Eagle had said, in shambles...
What was it that Eagle had meant by that?
"Ouch", yelped she, as someone practically ran at her, almost pushing her down.
Lantis stopped, looking dazzled, and in an instant he was down on his knees next to Hikaru, helping her up and apologizing. She laughed, and he seemed confused.
"It's okay, I'm fine. Your hair, it's a mess, you know."
Lantis immediately took his crown off, it had been in a crooked position anyway, and started cleaning his hair. Hikaru helped him. There were strains of grass among his hair, and leaves on his clothes.
"What have you been up to, crawling around on the ground?" Hikaru laughed, Lantis seemed embarrassed and uncomfortable. Finally, they were both standing on the path, and her smile was able to melt his icy awkwardness away. He offered to walk her inside.
"Lantis, I –"
The two of them turned around. Eagle had just ran to the scene, looking out of breath, and his clothes were somewhat out of order. They were white, too, and stained with grassy green. Hikaru blinked in confusion, as Lantis grabbed her by the arm and started pulling her away.
"Did you get into a fight with Eagle, Lantis?"
"Something like that, yes", answered the man, not stopping until they reached the door.
---
"Would you care for some tea?"
"Thank you, yes", replied Hikaru. She looked at Lantis and leaned her head to the left. "What was it that you and Eagle argued about?"
"Everything", said the man, not looking at her, pouring the tea. They then sat there in complete silence for a moment. Eventually, Hikaru was able to get it out:
"You seem so tired, Lantis..."
"That's because I am", sighed he, taking off the circlet on his hair once again. It seemed heavy. "I took this responsibility for master Clef, but now... I feel that I cannot take it anymore. No matter what I do, it hurts others. Clef never did that. He was kind, good-hearted, responsible, true... Me, I'm nothing but a man who exaggerated his potential."
"Don't say that... You're a great guy, Lantis, and I'm sure you will make a great master mage as well." Hikaru put down her tea and mumbled silently: "Everything is so mixed up right now." She hid her face and let out a long sigh, seemingly tired.
Lantis touched her face with a strange look in his eyes. Hikaru didn't know what to think of it, but it made her blush. She knew she was pretty nowadays. And Lantis was so unbelievably beautiful, so very attractive...
"You are strong. I'm sure you'll survive, Hikaru." A moment of silence followed. Lantis's fingers were still on Hikaru's cheek. The girl stared into his eyes with her own crimson eyes ones, mesmerized.
"It's just that I'm not the one in trouble here... Fuu is gone, Ferio is overwhelmed by his grief. Umi is confused. Clef is gone. You're fighting against Eagle, your best friend... He seems sad... Everyone is miserable..."
Lantis slowly wrapped his arms around her and held her still for a while. He then asked, with awe in his voice, if she really wanted him to talk to Eagle.
"Of course", exclaimed Hikaru against his chest. "The two of you are not meant to fight... I thought you were closer than any other friends I've seen..."
---
A loud crash reached her ear, as someone bashed a glass object on the wall. It could have been one of those crystal figurines or figures Lantis had in his room.
"Stop that, you insolent fool of a man. Just how low can you go, Eagle?"
"Well it's not like I am the only one to blame, is it." Another figurine was probably directed at the mage, seeing as Lantis made an infuriated sound and it crashed against the wall again.
"It's none of your business anyway!" shouted Lantis, seeming very upset – not like himself at all. He walked across the room to where Eagle was, probably, and Hikaru heard him push the other man against the wall. It was, most likely, to save the figurines and his own head.
"Well excuse me for thinking we were closer than that. My mistake. Maybe I should just go and bury myself."
"Do that and I will surely kill you. Or your dead body or whatever."
"Look, Lantis, I –"
This was when Hikaru left them alone. She was ashamed of herself, eavesdropping on the man she was in love with... She felt really awkward now. And thus she made a promise to herself, never to interfere in those guys' business again, unless it was seriously required. After all, it was good that they were talking it over. Maybe things could calm down soon.
---
"Hey there, Hikaru. Don't worry, I'm not going to start weeping now", smiled Umi. Hikaru walked up to her friend, who was standing by the railing, and the nightly wind was blowing her hair around. "I've been doing some thinking... I am going to leave Cephiro tomorrow, Hikaru."
"What?" yelled the redhead, shocked. "How come?"
"Fuu is gone now, and her family needs to be informed of her last words", began Umi. She also smiled to herself while adding: "We've grieved enough, Hikaru... Grieved more than she would have wanted us to grieve. I know you feel the same way – Fuu wouldn't have wanted us to blame anyone, or get stuck on the event."
Hikaru had to agree. She didn't want to lose Umi, that was why she didn't want her to go. Hikaru had made up her mind, she was staying in Cephiro.
"So you're probably not coming with me", said Umi then, looking at Hikaru in a gentle way and pulling her to a hug.
"Do you really have to go, Umi-chan?"
"Time has been standing still since we got here", started Umi. "They don't know that we're gone, yet. But unless at least one of us goes back, they will – time will get ahead of us, I know it."
"How can you be sure that it's standing still? Time passed while Fuu was here, didn't it?"
"During our first two journeys, we came back without losing any time", reminded Umi, looking at the sky above. She had such a sad smile on her face, thought Hikaru, feeling compassion for her friend. "I think it was because we were all here, the three of us... Then, as we were gone, Cephiro went ahead of us. When Fuu had came here, time passed differently – faster in our world, probably, than here. In fact I'm sure of it."
"So what you're saying is, that if we're all three here, time stands still. If none of us is here, Cephiro drifts away in the stream. If part of us is here, the others on Earth, Cephiro falls behind. Right? So – why would time stop standing still, Fuu is still here in a way, isn't she..?" Hikaru blinked, as Umi turned to face her, and the redhead found herself thinking about how much this girl had changed. Umi was different now, and her life in Tokyo was waiting for the new her. Hikaru knew she was being selfish, wanting this girl to stay with her – but she couldn't bear the thought of being without Umi, no way in the world...
"I think Fuu's spirit will not be counted as a Magic Knight much longer", sighed Umi. "She was already a part of Cephiro when she died, and now she's gone. She isn't anywhere now – so Cephiro doesn't have three saviours visiting anymore." Umi hugged Hikaru again, tighter this time. "I will be fine, Hikaru. You can stay, I will tell your family you're okay. You love him, right? Stay with him, stay here. If you think you have a chance with him, don't lose it."
The girls stood there for quite a while. Umi left Cephiro that following morning.
---
Hikaru had no idea how long she spent in Cephiro after Umi left. She was certain it couldn't have been more than a year, but she couldn't count the days either. Ferio's child, Lantis – everyone seemed to be needing her. Hikaru helped people. She loved helping people. It was what she lived for, and she even took her armour and equipment back when she was offered those.
"Fuu only wanted her healing magic", said Lantis, before bestowing the powers on her. "But you are sure you want it all back? Hikaru?"
The warmth in his eyes, the friendly question, Hikaru answered it with a cheerful nod. She got her life as the Magic Knight of Fire back. Not only that, she became closer to Lantis, being able to help him take care of security issues. Eagle and Lantis seemed to be getting along again, when Hikaru was around – but she knew they still fought. She had walked in on them a couple of times, and each time she'd seen them quarrelling. Eagle usually threw objects at Lantis, whereas Lantis used his authority to shut the other one up. Hikaru didn't want to see them this way, and she devoted a lot of her life to keep them talking. Sometimes she would invite the two of them somewhere, sometimes just simply say that she wouldn't have it anymore, telling them to keep her company and behave themselves.
And so, eventually, the day came when Umi returned to Cephiro for the last time.
Miss Ryuuzaki was twenty years old. Several years had passed on Earth, and Hikaru didn't know how to react to this change – only being a year older, herself. There was a strange wall of confusion between herself and Umi, and it saddened her. But even more sad did she become, when Umi told her the reason of her return:
"I am leaving to study abroad... And I might stay there after the studies too. I have little left in Tokyo, Hikaru – with you gone and my whole life changed, I don't want to stay there anymore. Here in Cephiro, I have you, but nothing else. This little guy is all that is left of Fuu", said she, holding the son of the present Ferio. Ferio was looking at them, probably watching them, so that they wouldn't drop the kid or anything. "And I don't know, my life is just so... So strange, nowadays. It lacks something, and I want to find that again, you know?"
"But why leave for good?" sobbed Hikaru, leaning her head on Umi's shoulder. "If I have to go back someday, where will I go if you're not there?"
"Are you planning to go back, then, Hikaru?"
"Umi-chan, you know I want to stay here. But who knows, maybe I will visit my family someday. My brothers, they wouldn't want to be alienated from me forever..." Hikaru sighed, remembering her family in Tokyo. Umi had told her they were mourning her, yet her oldest brother believed what Umi had said about Hikaru being alive and happy.
"We're leaving tomorrow morning", said Ferio then.
Hikaru turned to look at him. Her jaw dropped.
"I am going to present Fuu's son to its kin", replied he, taking the child from Umi now. "Besides, he needs a name. I want to name him in the way you guys are called, you know, like Fuu was. I want to ask around, make sure she didn't have a name ready for him, that sort of stuff..." Ferio looked at Hikaru, faintly smiling. It was as if all the sunshine outside couldn't take Ferio's darkness away anymore... He was merely living because Fuu had wanted him to. He loved this memento of his, Fuu's child, but in the end – he missed its mother enough to go insane someday.
"If you change your mind – Ferio's going to come back anyway – you can come to my room in the morning, Hikaru. Think about the possibility. I'm sure Lantis can spare you for a little while..."
---
"Why did you decide to stay, Hikaru?"
His voice was rich and enticing, warm. Making Hikaru's heart race, Lantis looked at her, smiling shyly. She forgot herself in the moment, at first, just staring into his dark eyes. So beautiful, those eyes were all she needed to be happy. Lantis's smile widened, as Hikaru couldn't even give him an answer. The girl suddenly shook herself back to reality and exclaimed:
"I stayed because I want to be here. This is where my heart is." She drew a large line across the view, to indicate that she was talking about the whole land. And then, she turned towards the man, finishing the line by pointing at him too. "I love Cephiro, yes. More importantly, I love the people here. Some in particular."
Lantis took her hand and in his own, and seeming nervous, he muttered:
"I once asked you if there was someone here, whom you would like to marry."
"I said you."
"...along with Eagle and a lot of others", added Lantis, hesitating. Hikaru saw her chance. This was it. She held out her other hand too, to him, and looked into his eyes while whispering:
"Should you ask me again, the answer would be different."
Lantis then silently took a ring from his own finger, and Hikaru let him put it on hers. It was a bit too big, of course.
"It's lovely", wheezed she, holding the hand up and watching the stone on it glittering.
"I will get you a better one soon enough", said he, closing her hand around the ring. "Hold on to it, until we find one that fits."
That was the moment he kissed her for the first time.
Standing there, under the starry sky, with her lips against his, Hikaru felt surreal. Everything around her was blurry, there was nothing there. Just herself and Lantis. She slowly lifted her arms to wrap them around his neck and he held her there, gently, kindly kissing her on the lips.
Hikaru didn't really know what happened next. She only got a dazzled view of it.
Eagle's white glove appeared from out of nowhere, to pull her away from him. Almost violently, the Autozamian pushed Hikaru aside and slapped Lantis.
"You", said Eagle, before marching back inside. "And me. Your room, right now."
"What was that about?" gasped Hikaru, rubbing her arm, the spot where Eagle had grabbed her. Lantis stood there like an idiot, with his right hand pressed on his cheek, the red spot there.
"Don't let it get to you", said he finally, turning to look at her. He had a strange look of impressed anger in his eyes. He then offered her his arm, and added: "I'll take you to your room, if you wish. And then I guess I'm going to have to talk to him."
"But what was it that happened to make him so angry?" kept Hikaru repeating, as the man led her through the hallway and to her door. "Lantis, is there something that I should know about –"
"Don't worry about it, really. I will take care of this. See you in the morning, my beautiful bride..." he bowed to give her a quick kiss, and then he rushed down the stairs. Hikaru felt a sudden urge to follow him, commit the sin of sticking her nose in other people's business – she had a very bad feeling about this. Maybe those two had been fighting behind her back again.
She would go to visit Lantis, first thing in the morning.
---
"...why are you still sitting there? I told you to get out of here."
Hikaru stopped. She hesitated at the door. Eagle was there, she knew it even before he answered Lantis's angry question with a determined voice:
"Maybe I won't go. Perhaps I'll just stay here this time and not let you chase me away, what do you say to that, Lantis?"
Hikaru pushed the door open just a little bit. She wanted to see what they were doing, why they were still arguing even this morning. More importantly, why was Eagle still in Lantis's room? Had they been fighting all night long?
"You're more delusional than I thought", said Lantis, who was standing in the middle of the room. He had a comb in his hand and he was going through his hair with it. He seemed to be ready to leave the room, only the coronet was lying on the bedside table, otherwise he was fully dressed and looking majestic as usual. Eagle, however... He was sitting on the bed, with a stubborn look on his face, staring into Lantis's eyes, and he didn't have a shirt on.
A tiny voice in Hikaru's head was telling her there was something seriously wrong here. Why would Eagle have stayed over – it was all a huge mystery for her. The mind of a girl in love prevented any possible guesses. She stood there and watched the two. Eagle gave a laugh and said:
"And you're underestimating me."
"Pass me the crown and get lost, Eagle." Lantis was holding out his hand in an order, Eagle took the circlet from the table. For a while, he held it himself, saying:
"This is incredibly heavy... It really is..."
"Give me that thing, right now. I'm telling you, we're already behind schedule."
Eagle looked up at his friend. Hikaru saw a strange look in his eyes, it could have been sorrow. He didn't pass the crown to its rightful owner, though. Eagle Vision got up, slowly, and Lantis let his hand drop. The master mage stood there, as if he'd been turned to stone, staring at the white-haired man and not saying anything. Eagle took a hesitative step, then another one. They brought him to the still Lantis.
"Is that what this is about, for you, Lantis? Keeping a schedule, looking over your shoulder every time I approach you? Really..." Eagle lifted the crown up, holding out to place it on Lantis's hair. "...I had higher thoughts of you than that."
Lantis said nothing. Eagle placed the coronet down on his head, and they stood there in a strange position for a moment. Eagle then lost his balance, and he fell against the other man, who was startled by it and fell down as well. Eagle landed on top of the grave silent Lantis, smiling in an apologizing way.
Hikaru in the doorway was already sick of it. She felt like something awful was happening right before her eyes, and the next heartbeat brought immense pain with it.
Lantis's anger melting away, Eagle's smile turning into a serious look. Lantis's hands being brought to Eagle's hair and face, Eagle's eyes targeted not at the other man's eyes but his lips. Suddenly, carefully kissing each other, lying on the floor. The white-haired man threw the coronet away. Lantis put his arms around Eagle, turning him to lie on his back instead of half-sitting on top of Lantis himself. Forcefully embracing the other man, Lantis went on with the kissing. Eagle moved his legs, wrapping one of them around the thigh of his friend.
His lover.
Hikaru in the doorway felt like throwing up. She didn't know how she had been able to watch this up until now, but as Eagle eventually got rid of the black-haired man's clothing as well, all she could do was stumble away. Running backwards, she was overtaken by regret and jealousy, along with disgust, twisting her guts. She couldn't get the image out of her head, the ring on her finger seemed to be stuck – as loose as it had been the previous evening – and she ran through the hallway, seeing nothing around her.
---
As she pulled Umi's door open, she met a worried pair of blue eyes, and she threw herself into her friend's arms. Crying her heart out and cursing that man, along with herself, she let Umi know she was coming along.
Umi looked at Hikaru's hand. One of the fingers was bleeding a bit, as if someone had been tearing it apart with well-nourished nails. Hikaru clung to her, and she wrapped her arms around the girl, not really knowing what it was that had happened. As they walked to the big hall for the teleportation process, Umi accidentally kicked something on the floor. A small, shining, metallic object bounced and rolled on the floor, finally disappearing somewhere in the shadows.
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It is done now. This trilogy ends here. I hope there is someone out there who didn't hate it to pieces, but oh well. I don't write to gain acceptance from anyone anyway. But here is a little summary, to prevent any misunderstandings, okay? So, the story in short:
-Umi spent the night of their return in her garden, and because she was hurting, she wanted Clef to help her get rid of the pain. In her hysterical state, it didn't occur to her that he might take it seriously. She didn't even remember the case in the morning – due to a spell cast on her by him. Umi dated, had fun, lived a normal life, wondering why she was so tired. Clef obviously left the position of master mage because of this obligation. Note, that in Cephiro time had passed more rapidly and kept on passing, so he had plenty of time to fix things so that he could devote himself to this task. Knowing that one can't take care of Cephiro with half a heart, he passed his powers on, to Lantis, and he eventually died because of the volume of the spell he was casting on Umi. He also wrote a letter to Umi, sealing it, and hoping that she would not get to read it, ever. The charm got weaker at night, seeing as Umi's mind was wandering the paths that might have led her to memories Cephiro – so Umi had nightmares where Clef was dying. In the end, she was able to go and tell him to stop, but he was already sentenced to death, lost a lot of blood and still willing to protect her. He died in her arms and told her to be happy. Umi, after reading Clef's letter and sorting things out, decided to go abroad in search of a new purpose for her life, so to speak.
-Fuu was contacted by a certain Ferio at night, Clef was the one casting the communication spell. Clef, however, was getting weaker and the Umi situation led to Lantis replacing Clef. Fuu went back to Cephiro, where Ferio welcomed her with open arms. They married. Now, there was a big misunderstanding... They slept together, of course, but because it hurt her, she told him not to touch her. Ferio took it the wrong way and it resulted in them drifting apart. He wanted to respect her wishes, but it would have been better for both of them to have a conversation. No matter how scared Fuu was or how she told him not to touch her. Ferio didn't get it, and he whined to Lantis about it – hence making Lantis caught in the middle. Lantis tried to get Ferio to do the right thing, but in the end, as things just kept getting worse, he had to tell Ferio to leave Fuu alone. Fuu thought Ferio hated her now, and she also hated Lantis because she knew that the two were talking about it. She befriended with Eagle, who didn't want to get too involved. In the end, Fuu and Ferio argued about the whole situation – Fuu was pregnant all along, and sick because of the stress she was going through. They found each other again, but it was already too late. Fuu died, giving birth. Ferio had to take care of the baby boy, even though he wanted to die with her. He also decided to do just that, not half the man he used to be. He also made a decision to visit Fuu's family in Tokyo with the baby.
-Hikaru was forced to watch Umi crumble to pieces and Fuu disappear. She was trying to change herself, becoming more mature in order to be worthy of Lantis's love. When Fuu was dying, Lantis summoned Umi and Hikaru to Cephiro. They said goodbye, and Hikaru stayed there, even when Umi went back to Tokyo. Hikaru was together with Lantis and Eagle – who were arguing, and she tried to keep them together. She was also madly in love with Lantis, of course. She witnessed countless fights between Lantis and Eagle. Note that it was usually Lantis who kept pushing Eagle away, when he had something to say. (The leading role was on Lantis's shoulders, naturally. You see Eagle trying to make a move on him in a number of occasions.) Umi's return to Cephiro for the last time was the last turning point for Hikaru as well. Lantis asked her to marry him, and she agreed. In the end, she walked in on Lantis making out with Eagle, and it made her so sick she decided to go back with Umi. She got rid of the ring he had given her, and went with Umi. Why did Lantis lead her on, you might ask – it's because he was not interested in having a relationship with Eagle, yet they can't seem to be able to stop it either. Eagle is in love, of course, and Lantis might be as well.
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Okay, that was it. Next time I touch the worlds and characters of MKR, it will be a nice story, maybe a romance with actual romance in it.