Sunlight was streaming inside the cabinet. Sakura squinted her eyes. It was morning and she had fallen asleep! And in one piece! She heaved a sigh of relief and stretched her arms. Sakura felt some activity outside the cabinet.
" Where did I put my towel…very troublesome…" Shikamaru's voice said. He pulled the cabinet door open, and stared at Sakura in surprise.
And a stunned Sakura stared back!!!
From inside the cabinet, she had a very good view of the room and everyone in it and everyone in the room are NAKED!!!
"…" Sakura felt her world collapse around her.
" Very troublesome, you women. First you nag me then you sneak in to see me naked…very, very troublesome." Shikamaru spat irritably, shaking his head.
Everything was now a blur to Sakura…the world was plunging into darkness and her sanity was slowly ebbing away. Suddenly, out of the chaos, a luminous god in all his nakedness shone before her!!!
Uchiha Sasuke looked at her calmly.
" Sa…suke-kun," Sakura looked away and blushed. She felt overwhelmed being in the presence of a naked Sasuke. This is the stuff that made her dreams! This is the stuff that inspires her! The stuff that gives her the strength to move on amidst life's tribulations…
" Sakura…" she heard the Uchiha wonder-kid say.
" Yes? My Sasuke-kun?" replied Sakura's voice, shaking in excitement.
" You are really…"
" Really what? Sasuke-kun?"
" IRRITABLY ANNOYING!!!"
Sakura was shocked as Sasuke quietly strode away from her.
" SAKURA-SAN!" Lee shouted, Sakura could see the muscles in his body ripple in agitation. " How can this be? You, in my room and me, before you with nothing on!!!" Tears began to stream from his round eyes.
"This is the stuff that made my dreams! This is the stuff that inspires me! The stuff that gives me the strength to move on amidst life's tribulations! Oh but it's too soon! Too soon! We could have waited for marriage!"
That brought Sakura back to her senses. She is about to open her mouth in retaliation when Lee held out a hand to her.
" Don't speak." He sobbed. " This is what Gai-sensei was telling about! Youth and our reckless mistakes!!! GAI-SENSEI!!!GAI-SENSEI!!!" His shiny bowl-cut bobbing, Rock Lee ran out of the room.
" Heheehee!"
Sakura turned and saw Uzumaki Naruto giggling mischievously.
" Wait! It's not what you think!" she snapped.
" Not really." Naruto said, wiping his nostrils. " I know why you came here Sakura-chan!"
The kunoichi glared at the fox kid.
" You came to see this!!!" Naruto exclaimed as he gyrated his naked hips, his weapon bouncing up and down.
" EEEEYAAHHH!!!" Sakura screamed. She intend to run, to throw herself off some high cliff…but somehow, her feet felt riveted to the spot.
" Enjoying the show?" Naruto said. " Well, there's plenty more with it came from! Kage Bunshin No Jutsu!!!"
In a flash, numerous naked Naruto were before her! They began to assemble in a pyramid formation with their backsides pointing at Sakura. The real one scrambled up the peak and grinned.
" Hidden Jutsu! Uzumaki Naruto: Triangle of Seduction!"
In unison, the real Naruto and his copies on the floor began to gyrate and do some dirty dancing!!!
" What's all this fuss about!?" a dominant voice boomed. Naruto stopped dancing and looked in the direction of the voice.
Hyuuga Neji emerged from the bathroom.
" Very troublesome." Shikamaru began. " The kunoichi with no definite skill sneaked in our room."
Upon hearing this, Neji's hand quickly reached for a towel…and covered his forehead.
" AHHH!!!" Naruto screamed while his replicas disappeared. "Covering that stupid seal before your dick! Have you no shame you bastard?" he added, pointing at the smirking, Hyuuga genius.
" Be ashamed of what? I have stunning hair, a body any woman on her right mind will die for and my dick is definitely BIGGER and LONGER than anyone in this room!" Neji announced proudly.
" Why you smart-ass, white-eyed bastard!!!"
All the guys reacted furiously to that boast. Shikamaru pulled out a ruler to settle things once and for all!
" Shame on you boys!" an angry voice shouted. They all strained their eyes to see and all the color drained out of Sakura when she saw a huge turtle inside the room!
The turtle gave all of them a death stare. " How dare you talk about beauty!?! You know nothing!?! I'll show you what real beauty is all about! The perfection molded in flesh and blood!!! Young men! And…er young woman, are you ready!? Here goes!!!"
A huge explosion rocked the room! When the smoke cleared up, Gai-sensei stood proudly atop the reptile in his crane stance, he still has his birthday suit on!
Sakura shrieked all the air out of her lungs and slammed the cabinet door shut.
" I think I just lost my appetite for the whole year…" she whimpered inside.
Gai-sensei's teeth shone as he surveyed the room with pride.
" I see. A weapons competition!!!" He gave a thumbs-up sign. " Let the games begin!!!"
" But Gai-sensei…what about Sakura…" Lee interrupted.
" FOOL!!!" Gai bellowed as he gave Lee a straight left. The poor gennin tumbled on the floor.
" Gai-sensei…" Lee looked up, his swollen cheek drenched in tears.
" Don't speak Lee." Gai said, his voice cracking. " Youth and doubt goes together! But you can only prove yourself worthy of the love you're seeking once you've vanquished all the rivals that stood in your way!!!"
Gai pointed to his favorite student, then glared at the other gennins.
" Lee, accept the challenge. Show them how mighty your weapon is!!!"
Overwhelmed by his sensei's encouragements, Lee burst onto tears!
" Gai-sensei!!!"
" Lee!"
" GAI-SENSEI!!!"
" LEE!!!"
" The hell…" Shikamaru sighed as he watch the naked pair hugging each other.
" Let the games begin!!!"
" OSU!!!"
" Hey where the hell do you think you're going!?!" Naruto shouted, pointing to Sasuke. He has just pulled his shorts up.
Sasuke smirked.
" I have no interest in childish games…"
Naruto's eyebrow twitched. Then he crossed his arms and laughed aloud.
Sasuke was irritated with this outburst.
" Why are you laughing, dobe?"
" Hah!!! You're afraid you'll end up with the smallest dick here don't you?"
" WHAT THE HELL!?!" Sasuke cried, veins popped out of his forehead.
" Don't let his mental attacks fool you, Sasuke." Kakashi calmly said.
" Wha…" Naruto snapped, surprised at the sudden appearance of the masked jounin.
" Oi, Kakashi-sensei you're playing favorites again!!!"
" Am I?" Kakashi said, looking at Naruto lazily. " I didn't intend you guys to become perverted animals, comparing your…uh, penises with others."
" So what makes you think you're a cut above all of us?" Gai replied, his teeth gnashing in fury. " My eternal rival, you're a big fool if you don't think I am not watching you. You are always late, visiting your dead comrades…always burying your head in one of those dirty novels…'
" You won't go in there, Gai." Kakashi eyed Gai dangerously.
" I have been thinking and was able to come to a conclusion…the novel was a diversion!!!" Gai announced.
All eyes stared at Kakashi. Even Sakura cracked the cabinet door open so she can see what is going on.
" A diversion, you want to people to see you reading dirty novels so they won't notice your small prick!"
" SHUT UP GAI!!!" Kakashi bellowed. Sasuke and Naruto looked at their sensei in disbelief.
The copy nin was now shaking in fury!
" You'll regret this Gai!" Kakashi snapped as he quickly jumped out of his pants.
Gai waved a hand at him.
" Are you sure you're up to the challenge? Hatake Kakashi?"
Kakashi smiled inside the mask.
" If I lose, I won't wear this thing ever again!!!" pointing to his mask
Gai felt his blood boil!!!
" You're so hip Kakashi!!! That's right! Flaunt it while it still has the freshness of youth! You'll only live in regret once you're old and your weapon is wrinkled!!!"
" And who told you that old men have wrinkled dicks?"
Sakura gasped. " I know that voice!"
Naruto jumped into the air in joy!
" GO! Show 'em what you got Ero-sennin!!!
" Now I'll show you why I AM sannin." Jiraiya said, winking at Naruto.
" Very well." Gai said.
" Wait." Kakashi interrupted. " How long will you watch us Asuma."
Asuma chuckled.
" I'm fine here."
" No you're not." Shikamaru snapped. " All you do was chuckle all day, maybe your dick is so small it's all covered up with hair."
A vein twitched just above Asuma's eyebrow.
" What…did…you…say?" He pointed a shaking finger at his chuunin student. " Well I'll bet yours is so lazy it won't even stand up!"
Shikamaru let out a sigh. " Troublesome…"
Now it was Asuma shaking in fury.
" Everyone's in…there is no escaping this. Sasuke, take off your pants." Kakashi said.
" Take it off! Take
it off! Take it off!" Naruto chanted!
Neji smirked then looked
at Choji. " Back off, you've got no chance in this."
Neji is starting his mental attacks! Gai thought proudly.
" Are you talking to me?"
" Yes, chubby people got their dicks all covered up with fat. Bet yours won't even be in inches, just centimeters…no wait, make that millimeters!"
Choji glared at Neji. " But I'm sure mine is bigger than Sasuke's. Look, he's too ashamed to take his pants off."
" Little prick Sasuke-chan! Little prick Sasuke-chan!" Naruto and a dozen of his Shadow Replicas chanted.
" SHUT UP DOBE!!!" Sasuke screamed, instantly, he whipped off every piece of clothing he has on. Shino, Kiba and even Gaara followed suit.
" What the hell are you doing?" Kankuro screamed at his brother.
Gaara looked at him square in the eye.
" I want to prove my existence, by showing I have the biggest of them all!!!"
Kankuro hung her head, and then he felt all eyes are staring at him. He looked at the door, and he saw the naked, hairy jounin standing before it, looking at him and tapping his foot impatiently.
" Looks like I have no choice." Kankuro said in defeat as he pulled down his shorts.
Everyone in the room cheered wildly.
Inside the cabinet, Sakura was growing desperate.
" I need to get out of here before…"
" Wait everyone!!!" Jiraiya's voice boomed.
" What?"
Jiraiya smiled naughtily.
" We can't have a male judge, he might only cheat!"
" What do you say we do?" Asuma asked.
Jiraiya clicked his tongue and smiled.
" For contests of this nature, a female judge is always the best!"
" A female…" Naruto began.
" …Judge." Sasuke continued, a wicked glint in his eyes.
From inside the cabinet, Haruno Sakura heard all of it and now, she feels all the eyes drawn to the cabinet where she is hiding!!!
" Oh no!!!"
" What the hell's going on here!?!" Tsunade-hime (a.k.a. Go-daime Hokage, a.k.a The Legendary Sucker, a.k.a. Tsunade-bachan) shouted as she just saw a screaming Sakura tearing across the corridor in record speed! The kunoichi of the Sannins followed her with a stare. A rumbling sound awakened Shizune from her slumber. She went to the door sleepily and reached it just in time to see wave upon wave upon wave of naked jounins and gennins scrambling after someone.
" What the hell is that?" Tsunade and Shizune asked in stunned unison.
The noise had awakened the girls in Kurenai's room. The beautiful instructor put a robe on and went to the door. With a peek, she realized instantly what is happening and quickly shut the door.
" What is that Kurenai?" Anko asked.
Kurenai was blushing. " It's nothing."
" Bah!" Anko snapped as she brushed Kurenai aside. Tenten, Ino and Hinata followed her. The snake-lady pulled the door open and a beaming, naked Kakashi was revealed.
He smiled at the women.
" Good morning everybody!" he greeted, and in a flash was gone.
The women were dumb-founded.
Next came a streaking Sasuke, his face in concentration. Ino let out a cry and fainted to the floor, then it was Tenten's turn as Neji sprinted past.
" Kurenai! Kurenai! Help me out here! Hinata! Oh no…" Anko said.
Hinata, she stood there with mouth wide open, her face was various shade of scarlet.
Uzumaki Naruto waved a hand at her and smiled.
" Watch me defeat Neji, Hinata! I'll show him I have the bigger dick!" the fox kid announced as he ran past the trembling Hyuuga maiden.
" Hinata! Hinata!" Anko called but Hinata paid no attention.
Kurenai checked on Hinata and was not surprised. She had fainted standing up!
Iruka-sensei should have stayed in his room. A strange ruckus woke him up so he got up to check what is going on. His damned fault, the first thing he saw was a screaming blur of red and pink. The next thing he knew, those naked jounins had grabbed him, stripped him off his clothes and is now carrying him over their heads to a destination only God knows where.
Sakura could not believe she could ever ran that fast! She is shrieking wildly, flailing her arms in all directions!
Inner Sakura sez: "I'm the luckiest bitch in the world! Look at me! Being chased by a bunch of naked guys!!!"
Sakura opened her mouth and screamed…
" ALL I EVER WANT IS TO SLEEP!!!!!!"