My One and only Random oddness fic
Oh. My. Lord. I was so tweaked out when I wrote this (One jumbo size caramelo bar, three glasses of black coffee, one 32 oz. mug of tea loaded with sugar, a Gatorade, and four 16 oz. Red bulls used in an attempt to stay awake and finish homework created this.. Mess.) I don't even think this one is funny, it's just.. weird. read at your own risk. All misspellings left for you to see.
Cyborg of the Teen titans sighed as he ran down the hall. The floor was littered with the bones of chickens and dead weasels, all of them leading towards a familiar green shapeshifters room.
"I hope he's not trying that again…" Cyborg muttered to himself as he slipped on a pile of bones and fell. He heard a muffled cry of horror as his ton and a half frame landed on something soft and possibly formerly alive. He stood up and looked down to see Orlando Bloom's corpse, mashed flat like the personality-less pancake he was.
"What the fu.. What is he doing here?" he muttered to himself, poking at the corpse with the tip of his metallic boot. It twitched slightly and He went berserk, his arm swiftly transforming into the sonic cannon moments before he let of stream after stream of highly accelerated sound waves into the corpse, literally blowing it into pieces. Cyborg blinked as his armor was splattered with meaty gibs and blood.
" stupid pop culture zombies." he muttered before continuing down to Beast Boy's room. he sighed as he realized he was too late. Beastboy had managed to skin and kill nearly four thousand Weasels and chickens in his odd attempt at bringing Terra back to life. On his body, a malformed disgusting pile of flesh and feathers with bits of fur in the form of Terra sat there. Electrodes of all types were splayed all across the disgusting mess and it was pulsating with the electricity that flowed through the muscles of several dead animals.
"Beast boy, this isn't going to…" Cyborg did not get to finish as the beastly mess on the bed animated and sat up strait. A crudely cut mouth leaked blood as it cracked open, emitting a foul smell; no doubt the stench of animal death and decay. Cyborg immediately began to retch as Beast Boy ran to his mess and began kissing it fiercely, crying about how much he had missed his love. Those were the green boy's last actions as the beast immediately devoured him and stormed out of the tower, looking for more green children to eat. Cyborg, after witnessing the ghastly scene, promptly turned on his heel and ran for Raven's room- He needed some good lovin' to forget that horrible mess.
In Raven's room, he received the aforementioned lovin'. Basking in the afterglow of sex, sex, oh, and don't forget- sex, They both lay there, smoking cigarettes. Cyborg was about to ask Raven a question of some sort- Something to do with evil Zombies- When Robin bursted in the room. He took one look at the scene and began to cry tears of Happiness.
"After all these years.. My wish has Come true! THREESOME!" he shouted running towards the Bed. Cyborg screamed like a little girl and ducked under Raven's covers as the aforementioned Goth girl stood and materialized a bat out of no-where. Robin met the bat face first and flew out of the room, clutching his face in pain.. Raven was about to sit back down when Starfire came zooming in, crying about some form of 'vast worriedness of death'. Raven could only look confused before Yu Suzuki came running into the room screaming something about a money shot. Cyborg then proceeded to pull the poor game designer's skin off, layer by layer to prove that he was not a man but an android sent to the past to assassinate him. Raven began to cry from the shear insanity of it all whilst star began trying to seduce her, under the auspice that by doing so, she would save her happy cake oven. But before anything serious could happen, yet another strange thing happened. Jinx came flying into the room, with a message in hand. She tried to leave only to be mauled by a clone of Cyborg, which happened to step out from the future in order to –gasp- assassinate someone.. But it couldn't remember who. So it ran around the room, assassinating random people as they appeared. Raven lost her sanity, Cyborg lost his nookie, and star lost her happy cakes. all was well. And the world died in peace.
-The end.
(A/N: Oh man. See what happens when I'm tired? That's why I usually just go to sleep. But nooo. That stupid teacher just had to have that damned report the next day. I'll make a deal with those of you who actually read this tripe. If you can avoid flaming, I will never post this type o unfunny trash again. I just wanted you guys to see the Result of a very tired Angelicdhampir2oo4. Oh and go ahead and Review, if you want. I don't really care what is said about this story so long as I'm not flamed)