Hi Guys!!

I really struggled with this chapter - more than I have with anything else. I think because I want them to be all happy etc... but after everything they have both been through there has to be some major issues.....know what I mean? So I've got to work through those a little bit first, but I am certainly working on them being ok. So hang with me....I hope you like this one because I think I have re-written it about 4 times now.

Cheers!!

Chappelle started up the questions on Michelle. "What else happened while you were there Michelle? How many of them were there?"

Michelle was too agitated to be doing this now. She hadn't slept since she left CTU; she was weak, hungry and still very frightened. One of the medic's Tom, was in the middle of stitching up her first foot and it hurt like hell. "Do we have to do this now? I just want to get out of here."

Jim, the other medic, answered Michelle as he continued studying her knees and thighs. "Michelle you are going to be here for awhile, can we get you something?" He turned and faced Tony and Chappelle, "You should have someone bring some food and drink in – water and juice for Michelle and something soft like yoghurt or ice cream." He asked Michelle again, "Have you had anything?"

"No."

Tony was horrified. "Nothing for all this time? You can tell you have lost a lot of weight."

"Whenever they let me go to the bathroom I skulled as much water as possible – like until I felt full."

Chappelle took a call from CTU where they were holding the other men.

Michelle started moving her legs, and becoming very restless. Tony started stroking her hair and running his other hand on her arm to calm her down. She started trying to sit up, her face was very tense and her eyes looked extremely stressed. Jim held onto her firmly, "What's wrong Michelle? You have to stay here."

"I just.....I....I can't do this, I just can't do this now."

Chappelle walked over and called Tony, Jim and Tom to talk to him. They called Hammond who was in the next room interviewing agents, to come and stay with Michelle for a few moments. Before Tony walked to Chappelle he put his hand on her cheek "It's going to be ok Chelle, you'll see, I'm going to get you through this."

Chappelle got straight to the point. "Tony this is going to be hard for you to hear. It seems one of the men they are holding back at CTU has admitted that Michelle was sexually assaulted. He claims he stopped it and made the man get off Michelle but with so many of them there for so long he didn't know if it had happened any other time." Tony jumped in, "It's true. When one of them was speaking to me on the phone he was bragging about a few of them having a go with her.....I swear I want to kill every last one of them." He paused and rubbed the side of his face, "You should have seen what Pault was doing to her in front of me."

Jim put a hand of support on Tony's shoulder, "I was just going to have Michelle remove the t-shirt, and there is blood all around her thighs and some very deep bruising near the top of her leg that looks a lot like a hand print."

Hammond was a nervous wreck around Michelle. He knew it was he who forced her on the mission and he blamed himself for every scratch on her. "Michelle, I'm so sorry for what has happened to you, I never imagined it would have turned out this way. I am so sorry."

She responded in true Michelle fashion, a reason she was so loved and highly respected at CTU. "You didn't know Brad, everyone did their best and I'm so grateful for that, and the extra hours you all worked to help me."

Hammond forced a smile of appreciation. "You are a great agent Michelle, on and off the field."

Michelle was so sore and uncomfortable. She figured they had her lying on a bruise or something. She began to shift around again. The other men walked back over and again held her down.

"Just let me get up for a minute. I want a shower, some sleep. God you can't make me stay here you know..." Michelle did know that they could easily, she was just clutching at straws."

Chappelle took control of the situation. "You know that's not true Michelle. You need to help us out with a few things...ok?" She barely nodded her head, looking defeated. "We need to start by removing your top so we can check the rest of your injuries...."

"No way." She looked up at Tony, who if anything, just looked really angry. "Tony...tell them."

Tony was trying so hard to keep himself together. On one hand he was just mortified at what had happened and he needed to be able to let out his emotions. One part of him just wanted to scoop Michelle up and protect her from anymore pain and discomfort but he knew she had to face what had happened the same as he was going to have to. Everybody around them was doing everything to help Tony and Michelle get through this in the best possible way. Having everything happen in front of Chappelle and his staff made it so much more difficult for him to show his emotions.

"Chelle, I need you to do this...." Tony felt like he had betrayed her. She was begging him with her eyes to not let them touch her but Tony knew no matter how hard it was on her, she needed immediate attention.

She couldn't believe Tony hadn't stuck up for her. Didn't he see how tired she was? Couldn't he tell how much she just needed to cry and fall apart? She felt so alone. "I don't want to be here, I don't want to remove my clothes again....this is the first piece of clothing I've had on since they took me. Nobody else is touching me...."

"Hey hey sweetheart......don't think of it like that. I'll hold you, we go through everything together from now on. I promise you I will get you out of here as soon as possible."

"I'm just so tired..."

"I know. Just think, I'll take you home and you can snuggle in the big warm bed and sleep for as long as you want – I'll hold you the entire time."

Jim put a hand down on Michelle and spoke in a gentle voice. "We understand how frightened you are, but we are doing this to help you. You need lots of support after an ordeal like yours Michelle. We know that you were sexually assaulted. We will be gentle and as quick as possible. There is blood still seeping through your top Michelle, you must have cuts that need immediate attention......this is what is best for you."

Tony could tell Michelle had just let most of that fly in one ear and straight out the other. He felt so helpless, after 3 days of what she had been through, she deserved to feel nothing but comfort and security. His heart sank a little when she looked straight past him to Chappelle.

"Chappelle, I need to use the bathroom.....now."

They all looked at each other, their eyes expressed concern. "Ok Michelle, Tony can escort you."

"I don't need an escort, I'm not a criminal you know." Michelle was angry and hurt. She couldn't understand why they weren't cutting her just a little bit of slack. God at least let her shower and wash the last 3 days off her. Let her just fall apart for a few minutes like she needed too. She started to slide herself off the bed, she was greatly shocked at the weakness in her body.

This wasn't going how Chappelle wanted it to be. "We know that Michelle, you need to know that we are not the enemy."

Things were flying out of her mouth before she had a chance to edit them. "Then how come I still feel scared? How come I'm petrified of what all of you expect from me or are going to do? And how come I feel so alone?"

Her words shocked them all. That was the last response anyone was expecting. Tony jumped up to go to her, "Chelle..." Chappelle interrupted him and motioned for him to stop and stay where he was. Chappelle took a few steps closer to her...

"Michelle, there is no need for you to worry about us....you know us – you have been through these procedures a million times with us...it just feels strange because you are on the other side of it now.....this is really hard for us too."

Everyone watched as Michelle's body swayed. Tony felt sick watching her like this – she looked so frail and small, her face was pale and her shirt was sticking to her body with blood. When she spoke her words were weak..

"That's right Ryan, you know me. Usually you respect me and listen to what I am saying....why can't you do it now?"

Jim interrupted them, "We can talk about all this BUT you are losing blood, you can barely stand, you have gone very pale and I absolutely need to be able to see what is going on NOW."

Michelle just stood completely unsure of what to do. Tony walked up to her, put a hand on each shoulder and whispered into her ear, "I'm begging you to listen to me Chelle. I know you are scared, I am too. You have to let them help you, I can't handle anything else happening to you – please Chelle, I need to know you are getting fixed up."

"Bu...but Tony..."

"No buts Chelle. Do this for me. Don't you trust me?"

Michelle looked into his pleading eyes. "OK.....for you."

His shoulders dropped and he sighed in relief. He knew she doing it for no other reason than for him, but at this point he would take anything. "Thank you Chelle. It's going to be ok.....you'll see."

Michelle nodded her head. She watched Tony motion to Tom and Jim that they could come over. He moved around her body so he could hold her from behind. Her body felt cold and so weak and flimsy that Tony felt like it was him just keeping her even standing.

Tom started getting different instruments out and Jim spoke to Michelle. "This is the best thing for you Michelle. We will do this as quickly as possible ok?" He gently took hold of the bottom of her top and began to lift it up.

Tony helped lift her arms up and pull the shirt over her head. As soon as it was off he wrapped his arms around her as much as possible to help her feel a little more protected. He pressed himself into her, holding her tightly. He could feel the wetness of blood seeping into his clothes from hers.

The blood was coming from two deep cuts near the top of her rib cage on the side. From lying on her back the blood had poured down her back everywhere. There was also extremely deep bruising all down her left side. "What are these from Michelle?"

"I don't know..."

Tony spoke up, "I think it must have been from Pault right at the end. Before he started umm...umm attacking you Chelle you didn't have those cuts – I would have seen them."

Jim looked at Tony, "what kind of weapons did he have on him?"

"I only saw the gun, then again I didn't go through his pockets or anything." He called for Chappelle to find out what was found on Pault.

Jim shifted his gaze back to Michelle. "Do you remember? What he used on you?"

"I don't know."

Tom got off his knees from checking the rest of her stomach. "What about these scrapes and bruises?"

"I don't know."

They all looked at each other. Michelle spoke up again, she didn't want them to think she wasn't cooperating "Sorry, I know I'm not helpful, it's just they were doing something to me like every hour night and day the whole time they had me. My body just hurts and I can't remember though where or when I got most of these injuries. Any bruising would be from the throwing me to the ground or kicking and punching me...."

She could hear Tony's breathing become shallow and fast. She hated what all of this was doing to him. She didn't want him to feel responsible for her simply because of what had happened just before she left.

Jim looked relieved that Michelle had finally spoken up a little. "That's ok Michelle. Thank you for telling us all of that....you are doing really well. The hand print bruise here on the top of your thigh – can you tell me anything about that? Do you think that would have been from when someone was forcing themselves on you?"

Tony gritted his teeth, he wasn't sure he could face this. He could feel her whole body become tense.

Michelle immediately got very defensive. "I was not raped!!"

Tony, Jim and Tom didn't really believe Michelle as much as they wanted to. She didn't realize how much they actually knew. Tony kissed her on the neck and spoke gently. "Chelle we saw what Pault did to you on the video the night you were taken, and look what I just had to watch only a little while ago. It's ok, you can tell us."

As they all spoke Jim was trying to trace some butterfly clips across the wound to stop the blood flow as much as possible until Michelle was calm enough to lie down and let him start stitching.

"There is nothing tell, I was not raped. Just leave it would you." She couldn't have this conversation – how could she ever expect Tony was going to stick around once he knew all the details.

The desperation and urgency in Tony's voice surprised everyone. "Are you telling me that besides what I witnessed with Pault not one other person laid a hand on you?"

She wanted to lie but knowing exactly what CTU was capable of she new damn well they would get the truth in the end anyways. She felt angry with Tony for him making her tell him. Didn't he realize how this would change things? She wondered if the blurriness she had in her eyes meant she was going to pass out again. She just felt so rotten all over, it was hard to decide what to concentrate on. She finally offered him an answer...

"Y...ye...no...no...yes. YES OK, someone tried but it didn't get that far. Is this over yet?"

With all the hatred, anger, guilt and hurt Tony was feeling charging through his body, he didn't even realize how rude and rough he was to Michelle. "Does it look like we are done??" His hands left her body as he stood back to kick a chair. When he let go of her she had to grab the nearby pole for support. She almost jumped out of her skin watching him kick the chair and hear the crash it made.

Chappelle walked over. He didn't say anything to Tony as he wasn't sure what was going on – he figured Tony had a million reasons to be kicking something. "He had a couple box cutters on him. One blade had blood on it, it's getting tested now. How are things going here?"

Tony rubbed his face and stared at Michelle who was fixated on the ground. Jim was the only one to offer him a response. "Well I can tell you the blood on the box cutters will be Michelle's. There are 2 deep wounds on her ribs – I believe he must have jabbed her with it and then turned it around. Here...we have hit a bumpy patch but we will work through it. As soon as possible I need to stitch Michelle."

Tony spoke loudly to Michelle before Jim barely had finished what he was saying. "Who was it? How many of them and how many times?"

"I don't know with Pault, mainly what you saw I guess. Just once with Luke."

"You know his name?"

Michelle couldn't believe what she was hearing. "And what the hell is that suppose to mean Tony?"

Tony caught himself this time. "Nothing.....sorry, it means nothing. I just can't handle the thought of those men touching you. I'm sorry Chelle. Can you tell us exactly what happened with Luke?"

"I would rather not. There is no reason why I have to go into it all." Tony seemed angry enough, she shudder to think how he would react to her when he knew more.

Tony rubbed his face so hard. His mouth was open a little and his eyes looked glazed over. He didn't know how much more of this he could take. He thought once he got her back in his arms that everything would be ok, it was almost easier when he didn't know how his Michelle was treated. He could not accept Michelle shutting him out though. As much as it hurt, he knew it hurt her more and he wanted to help her through it.

"There is every reason." They caught eye contact. Even from far away anybody could see the fear in her eyes. His words were stern, "I deserve to know." Jim, Tom and Chappelle were shocked at Tony. He didn't seem to realize how he was speaking to her was upsetting. They could see how crushed he was.

There was no energy left in Michelle. An image of Luke flashed through her mind but also didn't leave. She began replaying what had happened, as she relived the terror her body tensed up "He was really big.....big and strong...I couldn't even fight him off. He threw me onto the bed and told me to lie still, but I kept trying to get away. Every time I moved he would punch me until eventually I couldn't move anymore..."

Tony was shaking his head and tears had begun to roll down his cheeks. He put a hand out to her but she brushed it off. She desperately wished she could be in his arms but it felt as though with every word she spoke she lost him a little more. He looked even more lost. Tony didn't know where to look, how to stand – his body felt like it was falling apart. He was no longer in control of himself.

"Have you heard enough Tony, do you want me to stop?"

"No, no....no – I want you to finish."

"He grabbed at my chest over and over, he was hurting me." She started to cry. "He kept shoving his tongue down my throat. That made me so sick. I kept trying to get away but he would just hit me again. Then he went to....well...ummm....you know....and I freaked out and told him I had an STD and I was infectious."

Finally it felt like her Tony broke through this protective mask he had created for himself and offered Michelle a small smile. "Wow Chelle, that was so smart. I'm proud of you."

"I thought for a second that just maybe he'd leave and I'd be ok but then he goes, 'you sick bitch' or something like that and slapped me across the face. Then he said, 'doesn't matter there are plenty more things you can do for me'.

Jim and Chappelle both took a couple steps closer to her. "I can't believe it, I am so sorry this happened to you Michelle.....keep going."

"He sat up and started undoing his belt and pants. I was begging and pleading with him not to make me do it. Tony...I'm sorry. I didn't know what to do, I felt so sick. I was begging." Her crying was becoming more and more hysterical. Her breaths were short making her become even more light headed. Again Tony tried to go to Michelle and hold her but she pushed him away.

Tony crouched to the ground and put his head in his hands as he cried. He was so scared that Michelle wouldn't let him come near her. He figured it was because of what he let happen to her. He couldn't believe he hadn't protected Michelle enough and this is what had happened. They should have got to the house earlier....better still he should have never let her go.

"Keep going..."

"He pinned my arms above my head and started kissing me again on my mouth and ....on....umm....you know...my chest. Then this guy saved me, he came to the door and started yelling at Luke to get off me. He said if Pault found out he had touched me he would kill him. It was the longest minute of my life as he decided what to do, then he jumped off me and left the room."

The room was silent, nobody knew what to do or say. Chappelle and Jim both made their way over and hugged Michelle. She almost collapsed in their arms. Tony stood next to her, "Are you going to let me touch you now?"

She barely nodded but Tony would take anything right now. He pulled her in for a hug. It felt awkward. She hated the silence, "See I shouldn't have told you anything.....nobody can even speak." She pulled out of Tony's arms and stepped back. Tony looked hurt. She couldn't stay with him like that though – it was like he couldn't even look at her. From some of the things he had said to her she knew he was incredibly angry with her. She was hurt that he had pushed her and made her tell him what happened and then he got upset with her like that. She gave it one more attempt to break the silence. "What are you thinking Tony?"

His eyes explored the entire room never once catching hers. "About him.....Luke....Pault...their fucking hands all over you, the way Pault looked at you. The way he touched you and the fact that you won't touch me...."

"Stop it Tony! Don't say that...."

"You asked me..." He barely knew what was even going on. He was just beside himself that she kept pushing him away. How could she do that? Wasn't she supposed to need him right now? How could she just give up on him like that? Didn't she care how hurt he was....how much he needed her right now?

Michelle was now not only so close physically to giving up but also emotionally. "Why are you being like this Tony? I wanted to know how you are feeling."

Tony snapped, "How the fuck do you think I'm feeling?"

He could have shot himself for exploding like that. He was scared to open his mouth again, not knowing if he would be able to control himself. He was a devastated mess. Everything he had felt for the last 3 days was hitting him like a pile of bricks at the same time he was learning about how the love of his life was being tortured and assaulted. He wondered if Michelle could ever look at him the same, he had promised to look after her but he hadn't. That's why she wouldn't let him go near her. He may have been there in the end but too much had already happened. When he went to apologize again this time, he had a sinking feeling he had already used up his chances.

"I didn't mean that. God I am sorry - I'm losing it here Chelle – you keep pushing me away..."

Michelle looked sadly at Tony. He didn't know what to do, he didn't even know where to start. He tried again...

"It should be you telling me how you are feeling. You shouldn't have cared about what I was thinking – it's you that has got to be ok."

Michelle knew her words would be enough to completely send herself over the edge but in a strange way it felt like she was protecting herself.

"Just walk away Tony. Just let me be on my own. I knew this wasn't going to work.....I wanted it too, I thought you did too."

He felt like his heart stopped. "Just walk away? What's the matter with you? What do you mean you knew it wasn't going to work?"

"Everything is the matter. I mean it Tony, just leave me." Their eye contact was incredibly powerful as they both tried to read what was going on in the other one. She dropped her eyes to locate her t-shirt which was just a few feet away. She felt like death warmed up as she made her way to pick it up. She thought she was going to pass out or collapse the entire time. She picked up the t-shirt and her frustration made her yell at Tony, "JUST GO. YOU DON'T WANT THIS......PLEASE GO."

He watched her struggle to unravel her bloody t-shirt. He pulled his off and took it straight over to her. He handed her his shirt, "take mine sweetheart." He forced a small smile for her hoping it would entice her to take the top. She began to cry even more. She let her top dangle like she just didn't know what to do.

He turned his t-shirt out the right way and then stepped in so he was standing just inches from her. He gently took her hands and lifted them as far as she could stand and then he slid the new t-shirt down over her arms and head. He pulled it out so it covered down to most of her thighs. He stepped back a little so he didn't crowd her. He could tell she felt better finally being covered.

"Michelle, you can't end this......God we haven't even had a chance to start. Please....tell me what you meant when you said you knew it wasn't going to work."

"Tony..... I knew when Luke was trying to....you know....that once you found out that you would never want to touch me, or be with me. I understand...."

Tony let out a huge breath he had been holding for a long time. He walked to Michelle and stood right in front of her. He very slightly shook his head with the tiniest little grin. "Chelle, there is nothing in the world that would make me not want to be with you." He tucked a long curl behind her ear and then cupped her face with his hand and massaged her cheek with his thumb. "I just feel so sick thinking about that bastard hurting you – all I care about is making sure you are ok...."

"But Tony, what about Pault? How could you want to be with me after you know what they have done? I mean, I feel so ashamed. I thought you would never want me back, especially after what you saw with Pault."

He put his other hand on her neck and brought himself in closer to her. He kissed her firmly on the forehead. "You sweetheart should feel nothing but proud of yourself. I am in awe of you and how courageous you have been. Watching Pault with you was the hardest thing I have ever had to see. My heart just shattered when I watched him hurt you. I don't even associate what he did to you to me wanting to be with you – he is scum Chelle. What I am scared about is how this might affect us being together."

"How do you mean?" She finally allowed herself to put her hand on his chest. Tony felt relieved, he had been so conscious of what she had wanted to do.

"Well you might not want to have me touch you at all after what has happened. Which would be understandable. And I'm not sure how I should be with you.....I don't want to hurt you, upset you or scare you."

"Everything would be different between you and me and what happened with them. You care about me, they despised me. I've never felt unsafe or scared with you before."

Tony covered her hand that was on his chest with his hand. He gently locked fingers with her. "I care about you more than you can imagine. I promise I'll always make you feel safe..."

Michelle's legs buckled a little under her and Tony had to throw his arms around her to keep her from falling. "Aahhh Chelle, you have to trust me right to look after you. You have just got to let me take over now, I know what needs to happen. You can barely even stand, you are not capable of handling this on your own..."

Tony was beginning to become a little blurry to Michelle. She shut her eyes and then opened them again but everything was still getting hazy. She had never in her entire life felt worse than she did at this moment. She was having trouble completely understanding what Tony had even said. She was almost shocked to learn she was talking when she heard her voice. "You couldn't even look at me before. As soon as his name was mentioned you just let go of me. You guys just care about getting your answers, it doesn't count how I feel. I'm trying to look after myself because you don't want to...."

She had shut her eyes to block out the blurriness but she couldn't get them open again. She could hear his voice, it sounded like he was shouting but she couldn't make out what he was saying. A deep pressure on her side and lower back made her yelp. She had no control over herself, it felt like she was falling into a dark hole.

Jim and Tom helped Tony carry her body back over to the bed. She wasn't unconscious because she was mumbling, her body still kept moving around and her eyes continued to flutter open and closed. Jim had to keep pushing Tony out of his way as he tried to work over Michelle. Finally Tony found a spot out of their way standing at the top of her head. His tears would splash on her forehead and trail down her temples. Her last words continued to cut through his body as he prayed she would be ok.

Please review and let me know what you think...THANKS!!