Tony was promised he would be beeped before Michelle was to be bought back to her room. He used this time to take care of some details with CTU, complete his debrief and he even managed to sleep for an hour. He was talking to Troy and Chappelle in the waiting room when he was beeped that Michelle was ready.
Tony met them while they were wheeling her back into the room, her doctor followed. Tony rushed to her side but she was sound asleep. From what he could see of her face and arms she looked so much better. She had been washed, even her hair. All of her cuts were neatly stitched and bandaged, there wasn't much that could be done though about the severe bruises. Her right eye was completely black and swollen and the bruise even continued down the side of her cheek as if she had been punched multiple times in her face.
Tony stepped outside with the doctor. They shook hands.
"I'm Tony Almeida, Michelle's partner and work colleague."
"Hi Tony, I'm Justin Wallis. Michelle should wake within the next few hours. The longer she sleeps the better because she needs to sleep off the general or else she will feel sick."
"Thanks for everything Dr. Wallis, can you explain exactly what injuries Michelle has?"
"Please call me Justin. I was about to head and grab a coffee, would you like to join me and I'll walk you through everything? Michelle definitely won't wake before you return."
Tony was pleased to have such a good doctor taking care of Michelle. He greatly appreciated the time he was offering him as well. "That would be great, thank you Justin."
They talked a little about Tony and Michelle's line of work and what had happened to Michelle as they walked to the cafeteria and got their coffees. Justin until then, was unaware of most of the details. Once they were at a private table Justin began to fill Tony in.
"Basically with Michelle most of her injuries are what you have seen. I had to stitch up 7 - what I assume were knife wounds. 2 on her arms, 1 on the back of her neck, 2 deep ones on her rib cage and 2 on her left leg. I found 5 cigarette burns which I covered with burn cream and bandaged…"
Tony had lowered his eyes and was roughly rubbing the side of his face. "I can't believe what she has been through."
"Are you ok for me to continue Tony?"
"Yeah."
"Severe bruising all down her left side. I think those bruises are from being kicked repeatedly." Justin looked across the table at the broken man in front of him. He had seen plenty of men in this state, exhausted and overcome with fear for their wife or partner. Tony was different though, he managed to hold himself in such a manner that it was very difficult to know what he was thinking. Justin figured this was from years of being in Tony's line of work – you couldn't be a very good agent if your face gave you away every time. It was the watery eyes that gave Tony away and the desperation in his voice when he spoke. Justin wondered if Tony would be able to handle the next bit of information he needed to tell him.
"Tony, this is going to be very hard for you to hear…"
Tony lifted his head until he had eye contact with Michelle's doctor. "That's ok, go ahead." Tony didn't even know how to brace himself anymore for bad news.
"We did a quick run through of Michelle's injuries with her while she was still awake, sometimes that can help us put the pieces together. We found some very deep bruising on Michelle's thigh and lower stomach that suggested to us that she had been sexually assaulted. I asked a nurse to retrieve me a rape kit but as soon as I said this Michelle said she did not need one and became very defensive. She refused to not only discuss the matter any further but also for us to do any further investigation. Of course we respected her wishes but I strongly urge you to discuss it over with her…"
In a strange way, Tony almost found himself relieved to be able to discuss this with someone else, especially someone away from CTU. "We thought as much as soon as we found her, in fact one of her captors even told me she had been. I actually saw the main assailant kissing her and running his hands all over her but she swears that although someone tried, she was not actually raped. She tricked the man into believing she had an STD and so he got off her…"
"Do you believe it didn't happen Tony?"
"I believe Michelle, maybe I just want to believe her. The end of what she said matched exactly what one of the men we have in holding is saying as well."
"Do me a favor Tony, when she wakes up, try and talk to her about it again."
"I will. Was there anything else?"
"She is lucky, drinking water like she did saved her life. She was seriously lacking in vitamins but nothing we can't fix with a drip. She lost a decent amount of blood over the 3 days but again, she can recover from that. Her body is just so weak from being beaten repeatedly. She has massive internal bruising but amazingly no broken bones."
"What happens now? How long will she be here for?"
"At least over night, I'll see how she goes but I think it will do her more good to be able to recover at home with her own support. At this point I would like to just play things by ear and see how she goes."
Tony stayed chatting with Michelle's doctor for another few minutes before making his way back up to her room. When Tony walked in there was another man standing over Michelle as she slept. Tony stood in the doorway for a few moments before the man noticed him and Tony watched as the man studied Michelle.
"Excuse me, who are you?"
The man looked at Tony almost like he knew who he was, he instantly lowered his eyes away from contact with Tony's and began to head for the door of the room. "I am supposed to take the young lady for x-rays but as she is still asleep I guess I'll come back in an hour or so."
Tony had a very strong feeling that something wasn't right. "She has already had x-rays, why does she need more?" He was just fishing, surely if Michelle was going for x-rays her doctor would have just mentioned it to him.
The man was only a couple feet from Tony now and still wasn't able to offer him any eye contact, as he spoke he continued to begin stepping out of her room. "I'm not sure sir, he doctor just asked a few minutes ago to bring her down for further tests."
Tony went to ask him another question but he hurried away. The man wasn't in any kind of uniform nor did he have a badge or tag that Tony could see. Seeing as Tony had just been with Dr. Wallis he knew the doctor had done no such thing. He sat next to Michelle and had him paged to come to Michelle's ward. While Tony waited for him to get there he checked Michelle over and then stroked her hair. He had a sinking feeling in his stomach, something just wasn't right. Justin Wallis appeared at the door.
"Tony, is everything ok?"
He stood. "I don't know, I don't think so. When I got back to the room a man I didn't recognize was standing right over Michelle. He had no uniform or badge and as soon as I came in he was in a huge rush to leave. He dropped his head as if he was hiding his face, he never gave me eye contact. He said that you had asked him a few minutes ago to come up and get Michelle to do some more x-rays. He ran off before I had even finished talking to him…."
"Tony I didn't order any x-rays. Let me place a call and double check before we go any further that another doctor didn't for some reason…..I doubt that very much though."
Tony just nodded his head. He felt sick. He just sat and stared at Michelle as he waited for Justin to return from making his call. Her eyes opened a little and then closed again, her fingers moved ever so slightly. Tony took her hand, "Chelle?" Her eyes opened a little more this time and she rolled her head a little so she could see him.
"Is it over?"
Tony leaned over her and kissed her forehead, he stroked her cheek with his thumb as he spoke to her. "It sure is sweetie. You did great. I'm proud of you baby."
His heart skipped a little bit as he saw a little smile spread across her face. She was waking up a little more but she was still very groggy. "Tony, you are here….just like you promised you would be…"
"Of course I am Chelle…."
"Can you believe after all this time that we are actually together Tony?"
Tony relaxed a little and smiled. "I have to keep pinching myself Chelle so that I know it is really happening. I can't wait until I can take you home and we have time just the 2 of us."
Michelle's words were very slow and drawn out as she was still quite drugged. She was saying everything she was thinking, for the first time there was no nervous protective guard up. "I wanted you to kiss me so long ago Tony."
As much as he loved everything she was saying, he was also in awe of how beautiful she was – she was perfect to Tony. "I wish I had known that Chelle, I thought about holding you and kissing you the day I interviewed you. I just never thought I had a chance…"
Michelle was smiling, Tony swore he could almost see her cheeky smile breaking through. "Tony, you are so different from anyone else I've ever met. You are just so precious and sweet. I know how afraid you are of being hurt…"
She had caught him off guard. "Isn't everybody?" Tony knew she was talking about Nina but he hated even hearing her name, he hated more that Michelle knew he had slept with someone responsible for so much destruction and pain.
"It's ok to be afraid Tony…"
Tony and Michelle held eye contact. His eyes stung and felt watery and he could feel his pain beginning to seep through his pores. He'd spent so long forcing it all to stay inside but now it felt as though it was slipping out and he had no control. It felt like Michelle was challenging him – how was it that just because she spoke them, he believed her words. He wasn't sure what to say, he wanted to tell her everything he felt. That he was afraid, he was scared as hell of losing her. He knew she wasn't capable of hurting him in the ways Nina had but because he had cared for Nina but loved her, she had the power to hurt him in a way he couldn't recover from.
"I wouldn't hurt you Tony."
"Chelle you're not responsible for protecting me from my past you know…"
Michelle was struggling to keep her eyes open. She didn't want Tony to think she was falling asleep so she pushed herself to keep awake. She could see the fear in his eyes, the same pain he had carried since she had met him. "Yeah I am."
"No Michelle you're not. You are the reason I am able to move on from all that, it's because of you that I have been able to learn how to trust again and open up. That all means more to me than you'll ever know. None of that keeps me safe from feeling pain like that again…"
"Do you think you have moved on Tony? I can still see the pain in your eyes from loving her…"
Tony couldn't let her finish. "I didn't love her. You have it wrong, so wrong. I cared about her but I always knew deep down it wasn't going anywhere. What I hate is that I let so many people down by being blind to her. I hate that someone who I opened myself to could betray me so easily. Of course I have moved on, I've just learnt my lessons from the whole situation so I won't have to go there ever again."
Michelle took a deep breath. "Do you have to protect yourself from me?"
Tony studied the machine on the other side of the bed. She had asked a question he couldn't possibly answer. "You carry pain from your past as well Michelle. Everyone does. I see yours in the way you carry yourself, I see it in the way you guard yourself and carry it all on your shoulders. Look how you try and protect yourself from me, I've had to force you to let me help you and be here for you through all this."
Tony hadn't meant to attack her like he had, he had just become defensive because she had started to get to close to the truth of how he felt. He had spent most of the year protecting himself from Michelle by not making a move no matter how much he wanted too. If Michelle walked away from him now he would never be able to put it behind him. She was important enough for him to put his heart on the line for but that didn't mean she wasn't going to hurt him. He had just hurt her though by attacking her instead of being honest – so ironic considering being honest was something he expected her to only ever be with him.
Michelle just slowly nodded her head like she accepted what he had said. Michelle did except what he had said because it was all true, she was also allowing herself to accept that Tony did protect himself from her. It didn't feel fair though that he wanted to use it against her. Somehow the conversation had taken a turn she hadn't expected. Although it was only seconds ago she couldn't work out how they had gotten to this point.
Tony nervously stroked her hair, she slightly moved her head from his touch. "Look Michelle, I didn't mean to go off at you like that. I just wish you could see that you have put up walls with me, you are more afraid and yet you have been less willing to put your guard down and let me in."
Michelle didn't say anything which made Tony feel extremely nervous. "Chelle?"
After he said her name for the 3rd time she finally spoke. "What do you want me to say Tony?"
"I don't know….what your thinking. You are barely speaking so I know you are thinking a lot of things."
"I was just listening to what you were saying Tony. I wasn't trying to accuse you of anything. I wasn't saying it was bad that you are afraid of being hurt. I simply wanted you to know that you could count on the fact that I'd never hurt you. I had to protect myself over what's happened, not just with you but with everyone. That's what I had to do to get through."
"I don't understand why you think you have to be so protective of yourself with me over the last few days."
"I am trying to let you in Tony, how do you not see that? I've already told you lots of what happened. What more do you expect? How are you angry with me when you do the same thing?"
"Because the only thing I am afraid of is losing you – that's it. I know how shit things can be and I know how amazing you make me feel and I never want to go back. It already feels like I lose a bit of you when you shut me out."
"So it's not about Nina and what happened?"
Tony was talking loudly with a stressed tone. "No not at all. I mean for a long time it made me very wary of an office relationship but that went out the window the more I got to know you. I learnt from that how low I can feel and I swore to myself I'd never allow anything to let me feel like that again, no matter how it was caused. Now already I came this close to losing you to work duty and now that we have been given a 2nd chance I can't let anything get in the way of that."
"Fine, what do you want to know?"
"Your doctor told me how you refused the rape kit and how upset you got. They thought your injuries really point to…….well, you know. I want you to talk to me about this."
Michelle didn't try to stop the tears falling down her cheek but she did stop Tony from trying to catch them. "I've already told you everything. Besides look how you were last time we talked about this."
"I swear Chelle you can tell me anything and I won't act like I did before – that was so unfair to you. It is so hard for me to hear but I need to know, I want to know. Why won't you let me touch you Michelle?"
"I am angry Tony. You do the whole 'I'm shutting you out crap' but you don't listen to me when I open up and tell you anyway. I was honest with you before, I told you what happened and you don't believe me."
"I'm sorry Chelle. I just had to ask, I had to make sure…."
Things were out of control and neither of them knew how it had gotten to such a bad point. Tony felt so tired and desperate. Seeing as Michelle wouldn't let him touch her anyway he stood back as he raised his voice at her. "Did you know that one of your captors told me over the phone that a few of them were having their way with you? I spent everything second after that absolutely crushed. It never took away from how much I love you, I was just so scared of how you must be feeling. None of this is about how I feel, it's about understanding so I can help you get through it."
Tony's words made them both calm down. They couldn't take their eyes off each other. Tony walked back over to Michelle and leaned over her. "We have to stop doing this Michelle. There is nothing in the world I care about more than you, there is nothing I want more than you."
"I'm sorry."
"Don't apologize, please. I'm the one that got defensive…."
Tony was interrupted by Dr. Wallis walking into the room.
"How are you feeling Michelle?"
Michelle wiped her eyes and pulled the covers up higher on her body. "I'm fine thanks."
"That's good. Umm Tony I spoke to all other doctors on duty…" He wasn't sure if he should be speaking about this in front of Michelle.
Tony looked at Michelle and then the doctor. "Umm Chelle I'm just going to chat to Dr. Wallis outside for a minute. Is that ok?"
"What's going on? What about the other doctors?"
"Nothing for you to worry about. I'd rather I just chat to Justin for a moment."
"Please don't keep something from me."
Justin walked closer to Tony and Michelle. "Michelle, Tony came into your room before when you were asleep and found an unidentified man in here. He had no uniform or badge and when Tony questioned him he said I had ordered more x-rays…..the thing is, I hadn't and neither had any other doctor in the hospital."
Michelle looked at them both. "What does this mean? Who do you think it was?"
Tony couldn't hide his concern. "I'm not completely sure Chelle but I am going to have your room guarded from now on."
"You think it's someone from Pault's gang, don't you Tony?"
"It's the answer that makes sense Chelle, but I don't want you to worry – I'm not going to let anyone near this room or you."
Michelle couldn't believe this wasn't over. Just the thought of all this not being over made her feel sick to the stomach. She had no energy or will to deal with a moment more of this. She pulled the covers up to her chin and rolled onto her side so her back faced Tony and Justin.
Tony pressed his hands against the covers and rubbed her back. "Chelle…"
"Just leave it Tony…..I can't do this anymore."
Tony walked to the other side of the bed, when she went to turn again he caught her and firmly held her so she was facing him. "What are you saying Chelle?"
"I'm saying just let it all go. You don't know what these guys are capable of or how many of them there are – if they want me then they will get to me. I can only imagine the revenge they want for Pault dead. Look what its doing to us, it's all too hard to fight."
Tony was so tense and his chest was almost too tight to breathe. He was so lost and so scared of opening his mouth in case he said the wrong thing. "Isn't it all worth the fight Michelle?"
"What am I fighting for Tony? We are just falling apart…"
"We are not falling apart Michelle! God, I can't believe you said that – how the hell can you say that?"
"Tony we just keep arguing. We've never fought and yet since we told each other how we feel we just keep hurting each other. I spent all that time fighting to be home with you, I guess I just didn't think it was going to be like this."
Tony sat on the side of the bed. He looked behind him to see that Justin had left the room, which helped. He wanted to stroke her hair or face but the thought of her moving away from him again made him keep his hands stuck to the bed. "Awwe Chelle, please don't look at it like that. Can't you see that every argument is caused by how much we care for one another? This has probably been the worst week of both of our lives, of course it is going to be hard. We are both just so pumped of emotions I think we are having trouble sorting through them. I want us to work Chelle, don't you?"
"I want it to be like how it was when we went back to your house for those few hours before I went into the field. That was perfect, do you remember how that felt?"
The thought made Tony smile. "I've been hanging on to that feeling Michelle. Remember how we were so nervous and quiet at the start? I thought my heart was going to jump out of my chest when I finally got to put my arms around you and kiss your neck and shoulders. When you reached your arms around my neck and your body stretched out in my hands my entire body went completely weak. I felt so happy. Michelle can't you see how special it is between us? Isn't that worth fighting for?"
Tears were flowing down her face at a rapid rate. This time Tony pushed himself to take the risk and try and wipe her tears. She flinched at first but did allow him to touch her. Their eyes locked as he so gently wiped away each tear with his thumbs. His touch made Michelle feel safe again. "That is. You know the first time you kissed me in your office, you kissed me and held me in a way that was just so different than anything I'd ever experienced. It felt so much like you wanted me. So much how I had always wanted it to be. BUT I never wanted the arguing with you that came with those moments."
"Sweetheart it took those arguments for us to realize how we felt about each other. Michelle I wish you knew how much I wanted you, how much I want you now. I kissed and held you like that because I'd never felt more excited or passionate because I was finally taking our relationship to the next level and you were letting me. I don't think anyone could go through what we have in the last few days without getting upset with each other."
Tony's thumbs were still gently stroking his cheek and she caught one of them in her hand and kissed it slowly. Such a small gesture was almost bigger than any words could have been at this point. He looked at her and returned the smile she offered him.
Chappelle entered the room with Troy and Dr. Wallis.
Dr. Wallis took Michelle's stats while Troy and Chappelle spent a couple minutes checking with Tony and Michelle that they were both ok. Michelle could tell how relieved Chappelle was to have her out of his hands and in the hospital.
Tony looked back and forth between Michelle and the others. "Do you guys know what is going on? Have you worked out who the man in here was Dr. Wallis?"
Chappelle shook his head. "Tony we know nothing more than what you told Dr. Wallis. We do know that the man that was in here was in no way associated with the hospital."
"I want 24hr hour security on Michelle immediately."
Troy stepped forward. "We have already done a sweep of the hospital and I have posted a couple men through the building and one outside Michelle's door."
Tony squeezed Michelle's hand and spoke softly to her. "See sweetheart, it's going to be ok. No one can even get close to you."
Michelle forced herself to offer Tony a small smile. Inside though, her body was pounding with fear. CTU protection didn't give her the same sense of security it use to. She half listened to everyone discuss different scenarios and work through what options they had available to them. Numerous times she heard Chappelle mention that hopefully things would be a little clearer once Michelle had done her debrief. She was struggling to stay awake and so she tugged a little on Tony's hand. "Tony, I think I'm falling asleep."
He stood over her and stroked her hair. Their faces were only inches apart. "That's good Chelle, you need to get as much sleep as possible."
He kissed her forehead. When he went to sit back down next to her she grabbed his arm. "Are you going to be ok Tony?"
He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath before opening them again. "I'm going to be just fine honey, and so are you. I don't want you to worry about anything but getting some rest ok?"
Her eyes closed, her headed nodded slightly and within seconds she was asleep. Tony watched her until Chappelle called him back into the conversation. It was agreed they would do Michelle's debrief once she woke up. Dr. Wallis had a cot bought into the room so that Tony could lay down himself and get a few hours of sleep. Chappelle headed back to CTU with Troy to interrogate a couple of the men they were holding.
Michelle woke to find the room dark and Tony sound asleep on a cot set up next to her bed. He looked so peaceful, she didn't dare stir him. She was dying for the bathroom and to stand up and stretch her legs. She slowly swung her feet off the bed and took a couple steps. She felt a little weak but so much better than she had for the last couple days. She took herself to the bathroom and then walked outside her door where she bumped into Dan, the guard from CTU. Dan had been working at CTU for a few months, Michelle knew him a little bit, but not like she knew most of the other agents. She suddenly felt very conscious that she was only wearing the hospital gown that was open at the back. Dan smiled at her.
"It's good to see you up Michelle. How are you feeling?"
"Ok thanks Dan. Thanks for being here."
"Sure thing. What are you doing up?"
"I feel like going for a little walk, maybe to get a juice or something. I need to stretch my legs a bit but I've only got this gown."
Dan looked up and down the hall way. "They put a couple CTU tops in the cupboard, I'll grab you one if you want and then I can escort you on a walk if you would like?"
"That sounds so good, thanks Dan. I really don't want to wake Tony – he has barely slept at all the last few days."
Dan quietly walked across the room and got one of the shirts for Michelle. She waited for him in the corridor and felt so much more comfortable once she had pulled it on. They turned and began to slowly make their way down the hall.
Tony woke with a fright, a nightmare he already couldn't remember. He noticed Michelle's bed empty and so he scanned the room. The bathroom door was open and she wasn't their either. He lunged out of bed and out of the room where he found no guard. This offered him a little relief as he figured Michelle and Dan must have gone for a walk or something. He went into the bathroom and splashed some water on his face before heading out of her room in the hope of catching up with them.
Tony checked the day room, waiting rooms, cafeteria and the small garden outside. He couldn't find Michelle anywhere. He began to get a sinking feeling in his stomach. He phoned the other 2 guards but they hadn't seen Michelle or Dan either, as far as they were aware they should have been at the room. They had been instructed to notify each other if they left their posts.
Tony had Michelle paged through-out the hospital numerous times but after 20 minutes when she didn't appear he called Chappelle.
"Ryan, I can't find Michelle or Dan. They are both gone. Did you have Dan take her somewhere?"
"No I didn't. How long has she been gone for? We have the place covered Tony, she will be there somewhere….probably off in the garden or something."
Tony raised his voice. "No, I've checked there twice now along with every other inch of this fucking place. The other 2 agents haven't seen or heard from Dan either. I've got a sickening feeling about this Ryan. Send Troy here now…"
"But Tony…"
"Please Ryan?! It's been an hour since I woke up – there is no way Michelle would have left for that long with out letting me know. Besides, she wasn't strong or well enough to do anything other than maybe walk up and down the hallway a little."
"We are on our way."
Tony had Michelle paged again and then called all hospital security, along with his own two guards into Michelle's room. He ordered for a complete search of the hospital and as far as 3 blocks around the building. After Chappelle and Troy arrived the 3 of them walked and talked, searching every room on the 2 top levels of the hospital.
3 hours after Tony had woken the search under Tony's instructions had been completed and no one had seen or found a thing. It was literally as though Michelle and Dan had vanished into thin air.
Tony collapsed onto the chair next to Michelle's bed, he sunk his head into his hands. Troy approached Tony and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder.
"Tony, the marked search has been completed and we have found nothing. Michelle is definitely not in the hospital….she's…gone."
Tony couldn't lift his head. "I promised her I wouldn't let anything else happen to her. She hadn't even been back with me for a day and I've lost her again. I just don't think I can handle this Troy…."