Chapter 3: Moonlight Waltz
Sighing heavily, Aoshi silently slide the rice paper door open, eyes admiring the beautiful garden he visited almost every night for a peaceful hour of stargazing. His eyes seeming to over look the extra person within the tall walls of the in closed garden, his body may have been within the night filled beauty of the garden, but his mind was racing frantically from thinking of the young woman now within his protection.
She sighed heavily; the stars were her only way of escaping all the chaos of the current events. Tears' tracing her pale cheeks as a waterfall of sorrow was released within the silence of the dark night. She hoped the darkness would hide her weak moment if anyone decided to have the same thoughts as her to embrace the stars as a safety blanket from the reality of life.
The fresh smell of salty tears lingered with her scent of lavender as he noticed her presence. He turned toward the small pond in the corner to find her sitting on a rather large rock, piercing emerald eyes seeming to search the twinkling stars for answers to her problems and the confusion in her mind. He saw the hurt and sorrow etched in every tear she shed, and he knew she would hate herself if she knew he saw her crying. It was part of being strong. If anyone ever saw you cry, you would hate yourself forever, he himself felt the same way.
He stepped back into the shadow, his barefoot crushing a large stray leaf that seemed to have put itself there on purpose just so the young maiden would know he was there. His eyes raced from the ground to the young girl now looking at him. Her golden hair dancing lightly in the winter wind as she drew her sleeping kimono closer to her. The crystal tears shinning in the moonlight as her eyes softened. It was as if she was happy to see him there, like she felt a connection with him and that he would understand everything, and what scared him the most, he did. He understood how she felt, how she wanted a connection with someone, anyone. But he dare to never show it.
Alexia tried to smile as sweetly as she did early in the day, but her lips failed her into a rather sorrowful smile that matched her moonlight-traced tears. She saw the slight shock in Aoshi's piercing eyes when he stepped on the dead leaf within the perfect garden. If it were anyone else she would have hit herself over the head for letting them see her cry, but something about him seemed to say 'I understand that you are strong and yet you need to cry. I have been there.' She didn't know his past, nor did she care. He could have been the curliest person ever born, but that didn't matter, all she knew was his name and icy eyes that she seemed to see past into the gates of a lost heart and soul that needed mending.
He cursed the leaf before stepping closer to the pond. His Alexia-free-garden-night-walk would actually be a night he spent with the very girl who puzzled his mind and threw him into an abyss of utter confusion and denial. He crossed his arms over his chest as another winter breeze graced them with its freezing wind. He watched as she gently brushed the tears from her cheeks only for them to be replaced by more, heart wrenching, ones.
"Within the dark corners of my mind, wrapped in sheets of cobwebs and broken lyrics, lies a soul at rest. A soul that if awoken would cause mass havoc and chaos that not even the greatest of armies could subdue. A creature that is kept sleeping by the coldness of my features and the stone like walls around my heart and thoughts. And who so ever tame such a creature would be that of a pure angel, whose sings could act as the cobwebs and purify the ebon soul within my chest." Alexia softly said, eyes still looking at him as he still looked at her.
Her words sent a chill down his spine as he joined her by the pond, standing on the rock beside the one she sat upon. He forced himself to look at the stars instead of her tears and empty emerald eyes. He wanted to know why she was in so much pain. Why she was here and what made those beautiful emerald eyes seem to pierce his icy blue ones. 'I'm going crazy. All that mediation is getting to me. Why should I care about this pregnant woman?' Aoshi thought to himself. But a light voice from within his heart spoke the answer, 'because you have felt the same pain. We have felt the same pain and its time we find comfort while comforting another.' He ignored the voice that kept repeating that, half of him knew it was true but the other half refused to believe it.
She glanced at him and smiled, he was in deep thought. He looked like an angel in the moonlight. His ebon hair swaying in the wind and his blue eyes going from icy cold to warm and soft as if he were fighting something within him, just like her. His tall form seemed so welcoming to her, she knew it would be warm and peaceful in his embrace. 'Get a hold of yourself girl. You just went through a major tragedy and you're already looking for another guy!' Alexia screamed at herself within her thoughts as she shifted her gaze upon the stars.
His lips and voice betrayed him and spoke his thoughts, "What happened?" He just about slammed his head into the stony pond bottom as he realized he spoke such words. It was against his every rule to ask such a question. Battousai may have made him see the truth but he still wanted to keep locked up and cold.
"Everything came crashing down by my own sword." She stated in a somewhat cheerful voice. It reminded him of the young boy that Shishio had trained and took under his wing, the one that never showed an ounce of emotion other then a friendly smile and a cheerful voice. "I killed the man I married all for the sake of the future Japan." She finished, knowing Aoshi would be rather confused by her other statement.
'She... Killed the man she loved...' he thought to himself. How could someone kill the person they loved for a nation? And no doubt the father of the child within her stomach that was due in a few months. "What would cause you to do such a thing?" Aoshi once again desired nothing more then to repeatedly slam his head into the stones of the garden, for his inner strength to control his mouth was failing him dearly and he couldn't figure out why.
Alexia was quite stunned by his questions. He was a man of few words, she could tell, but with her, he seemed to want to know everything. It was possible that the other people within the house hold asked him to talk to her because they were to shy but something said that wasn't the case here, but rather his inner confusion of her existence in this time and era was what overloaded his self control.
"A rebellious group of rouge samurai had kidnapped some extremely important government officials and they said they would kill them if guns were used in battle. Me being an archeologist as well as a people's person was called upon for help. During my 2 yearlong stay at the Empire's Palace, I fell for his nephew and thus we married. But shortly after the Meiji Government and the samurai group made an agreement, my husband, Yokou, decided it couldn't be." She sighed heavily. Even though the pain was slowly fading, it was still there and it killed her to think about it.
"He wanted to kill the leader of the rebel group who was under the protection of my sword. I had no choice but to slay him." She curled her knees to her chest and slowly rocked back and forth as the pictures of them fighting head on with their swords flashed before her mind and played within the tears upon her cheeks. "I had no choice... but it seems so wrong and yet so right. I watched him die and he didn't even say a word. And thus I made a wish." She closed her eyes and smiled lightly, "I wished I didn't ever have to see the my family or friends again because of the shame I brought when my sword sliced through his chest."
A mass wave of sympathy and sadness washed over Aoshi's face and heart. This girl had done everything and anything to keep Japan at peace. She had thrown away her life and family, and yet she still didn't see herself as anything else other then a walking explain of shame for her family, when truly, she was a hero. She, no doubt, saved thousands and millions of lives by giving up one that was very dear to her.
The new tears made Aoshi's heart wrench and burn with hatred toward them. His hand wanted nothing more then to brush them away and keep them away but his pride over ridded such an urge. The girl was strong and had no fear but she still felt an unending pain that would always be there, even after she found a new love and a new life. The child within her would always be a reminder of what she did.
The silence was both comfortable and uncomfortable. The winter breeze was the only evidence that time had not stopped and that life was still within them.
"You're a hero." Aoshi said. He had over come the desirer to hit himself or slam his head repeatedly at that moment because he knew very well that he would comply to such things after the young girl was asleep. "Nothing less, only more. By slaying your love, you saved millions of lives. You saved innocent lives." He was surprise at his own kind and empathic words. And he wasn't done yet. "Your wish was granted for a reason, Alexia. Don't give up on life now. The child within you is enough reason to live if not for anything else." He forced himself to remain silent now. His lips and thoughts had betrayed him enough for one night.
She smiled warmly toward him and his eyes caught the action, turning to look at her. Her emerald eyes no longer were empty but rather full of life and the smile on her lips matched the happiness on her face. His words had touched her and warmed her. She hadn't thought about that. She was so wrapped up in the pain, she didn't realize that she had saved lives and that she could still save more as a means of repenting for what she did.
She slowly rose, planning on going to sleep but not before thanking the Ice Man. She wrapped her arms around him, letting her tears be brushed away by the soft cloth of his sleeping Gi. She was rather surprised when he returned the embrace and pulled her closer to him.
He himself was quite shocked as well yet he understood why. He was comforting her while also comforting his years of pain from losing his loyal friends. He smiled gently. It wasn't like she was going to tell anyone anyways, something in her eyes as she looked up at him said 'don't worry. This is our secret.'
He regrettably released the girl and unknowingly brushed a stray piece of golden hair behind her ear. His pointer and ring finger lingered there before slowly tracing her jaw line and finally falling to his side. His touch was warm and sent chills down her spine. Whether they were chills of pleasure or fear she couldn't tell but either way she was happy he understood her pain.
Bowing, she turned and made her way back to her room, a smile placed upon her mouth that wouldn't be going away anytime soon. Aoshi had found a way into her heart and had figured out her pain and understood her. He had offered her comfort when usually his pride would have gone against it.
He watched her retreating form and the smile on his face faded when she silently closed the door. His eyes fell upon the cold, gray rock that he had said he could allow to be his source of punishment. Shrugging his shoulders lightly, he decided sleep was best. While walking to his room he forgot all about the reasons to punish himself. The pain would stop now, and the healing would begin. For both of them.
How was it? Any good? O well. Let me know. Hope all is well forever one.
Has to go decorate for x-mas now
Ja Ne.
-B8-