SAILOR MOON, YOU'RE TIME HAS COME!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA… oh goodness. I'm back. Sorry if this makes you sad. Well, not really, if you didn't like me you shouldn't be reading this anyways. So it's your own fault. So yeah, it's been a damn long time. A complete system crash, rebooting the PC, faulty internet, the beginning of school, and just plain laziness have overly extended my hiatus. Unfortunately, I have returned in sort of a slump. Hopefully all of you, my loyal readers, like this one as much as you've liked my others.
Spike, Jett, Faye, and Ed were flying in the Bebop towards Earth…whoa whoa whoa…too far ahead, gotta rewind. Ok there we go. Spike lounged around in the cockpit of the Bebop, twiddling his thumbs. "Good God, are we ever gonna get a job!?" he called out exasperatedly. "Soon, my child." a voice called down from above. "That was a rhetorical question."
"Oh, my bad…bitch." The voice chuckled and soon Spike felt alone again. "Ok then, lets see what's on TV," he turned the TV on, and tuned in just around the middle of his favorite bounty hunter info show. He stared at the girl host, wondering what kept her shirt-if you could call it that-on, and willed whatever it was to go away. But then they said something that even took his attention off of the blondes breasts. "There's a reward out for them Sailor Moon girls, and they're worth 30, 000 Dollars!" the man exclaimed. Spike turned the TV off and danced around. "YES YES YES! Money money money! No more Jett cooking, no more smoking cigarette butts, none of that shit! We get CASH!" Jett heard his glorious proclamations and ran into the cabin. "Money!?"
"Yes! Isn't the thought beautiful!?" Faye ran in soon after. "Money!? YES! I can buy a new outfit!" They both stared at her. "No you can't, you're required by contract to wear that and only that."
"Oh yeah, I always forget." She skulked off. "Anyway, we gotta get going!" Spike yelled.
ON EARTH
"Man Lupin and Vash are right that is annoying…" Spike muttered as they began to search around. "Now where would a bunch of scantily clad, vaguely lesbo-erotic super hero girls go?" Jett mused. They both snapped their fingers and said in unison "Duh, the strip club!"
Two hours later they walked out. "Well it was a good excuse to let Mr. Author up there let us in, but now we need to actually try looking." Spike said. Jett pulled the bra off his head. "yeah, totally." They split up, each heading a different direction. Wait, that's what splitting up means. Oh well, they split up to search for the girls. As Spike ran off down an alley, a man wearing a tuxedo and a mask stopped him. "And who are you?" Spike asked. "I…am…tuxedo mask!" Spike snorted twice then nearly collapsed with laughter. "What? What are you laughing about?"
"Well, Mr. Mask, that has to be one of the single most uncreative names in the history of cartoons!" Tuxedo Mask looked down at his feet and blushed. "It's not my fault," he said resentfully, "7 year olds write the script…" Spike scratched his head. "That actually explains a lot. But it doesn't explain why you stopped me, I'm a very busy man and must get going." Tuxedo Mask looked up and put a hand on Spike's shoulder. "Well I just saw you, Mr. Handsome, and…" suddenly a beeping noise interrupted him. "Hold up that's my pager," Spike said, and took it off his belt. "Yeah…that was the Author, he says that this bit needs to stop now before there's a protest in front of his house, so bye!" and with that Spike ran off, and Tuxedo Mask moved to San Francisco.
THREE HOURS LATER
"I need to renegotiate my contract, I never new I'd have to put up with this transportation crap…" Spike said as he looked up and down the street. Suddenly he saw them, all 9 of them. They saw him, and instantly recognized him. "Shit, its Spike!" they yelled, and started to power up. "Shit, they're powering up! This could be bad!" Spike said and pulled out his gun. "Jett! Over here!" Jett came running over. He too drew his gun. "Allright girls, freeze!" Jett yelled. Suddenly they began to glow and floated up into the air. Then their clothes disappeared. "Oh my God…" Jett muttered, and both of them dropped their guns, and jaws in amazement.
After the rather raunchy power up, Spike and Jett picked their guns back up and faced the girls. They were all in their skimpy Sailor outfits, and all doing some odd…pose. And just standing there. Posing. "I, Sailor Moon, and my friends, are going to kick the crap out of you!" Sailor Moon shouted. Then they switched into what Spike could only guess was a battle-ready pose. Then stood there. "Oh well, you chicks were hot, but if you're gonna do this,"
AT THE POLICE STATION
"I'm in such a good mood I don't even care about that…thing," Spike said grinning as he and Jett counted out their money. "Yeah man, like fish in a barrel, couldn't have asked for easier shooting." Jett retorted, also grinning. They high-fived each other and climbed up into the Bebop, flying off into the distance.