FIRST! I don't own Rurouni Kenshin nor Saitou Hajime (although I wish)... RK is owned by Nobuhiro Watsuki.

It's time for me to write again! Yey! This time, it'll be a fic about Saitou's life before Kyoto and the Shinsengumi. This will be a romanticised tale of what he was before joining the Shinsengumi and why he left Tokyo (Edo). There will be times when Saitou will be OOC, I intend to keep most of his personality just twisting it now and then. But the OOC will be very apparent when it comes to his fighting abilities, I don't think Saitou became a great swordsman overnight. Agree? :O)

Oh by the way as most of the readers know.. In this fic both Saitou's parents are already dead. In case you wanted to know what their names are. It's Yusuke Yamaguchi and Masu Yamaguchi.

Okay here comes some of the Shinsengumi members.. Note this is not the Shinsengumi, I think the Shinsengumi was formed after this group led by Kondou-san left Tama for Kyoto.

*denotes sound/music/etc

Thoughts are in italics

CHAPTER XX - His Past and His Future

Sasue closed the door slowly behind her. She looked at the tray filled with uneaten food on her hands and frowned. It's been two days already that Hajime ran away, three if you count from the time that girl showed up in the house. She had always loved her older brother who served as the family's sole provider and protector after her mother died. It has been hard for him to provide for his other four siblings as most of their belongings had been sold off to help cure their ailing mother who died of tuberculosis.

She remembered the odds and ends jobs that Tatsuo took, from doing manual labor, roaming house to house teaching kendo and sometimes offering his "services". He hated teaching Kendo, she knew Tatsuo blamed the katana for all their misfortune but found no other way to decently support them. She had always wanted to help him, but Tatsuo took their father's last wishes quite seriously, to be the "man" of the house. He would not ask help from his blood relatives and would reject his siblings offer to help. She worried about him not going out and finding his dreams, she knew he could not, he was bound to them by the sake of loyalty and his own proud nature.

Hajime... Where are you?

She was never close to him, no one ever was. Their younger brother had been an enigma from the start. Their father loved him so dearly that sometimes even she found herself from time to time annoyed at his presence. She tolerated him to say the least, only because of Tatsuo. A sister can only be a sister. Hajime was Tatsuo's only brother and she could not fulfill that role. To her eyes when Hajime grew up, he lost the spark he had as a child and became a troublemaker. He became strong headed, suspicious and self-protective, still Tatsuo protected him as his only brother in the only way he knew how.

As she was lost in thought a dish fell out from her hand and hit the sink shattering it pieces.

A bad omen?

-------------------------------------------------------------------

"I really should go back." Midori said to Okita worry written all over her face.

"To Edo?"

"Hai! I'm sure he's there." She fidgeted "Who knows what kind of trouble he'll get himself in now."

Okita gave a quiet laugh "How well do you know him?"

"Huh?" She feigned ignorance at Okita's question.

Okita stood up and got tea set from the cupboard. "Can you prepare tea for me?" He smiled at her.

"This really isn't the time..." she stammered.

Okita sighed. "You know most of the time I like to share my tea, but sometimes it's even better to enjoy it alone, that's what Hijikata-san would say."

She hesitated for a moment and shot a look out the door. It had become very dark although it was only mid-afternoon. She knew what the boy hinted at, was correct and as she looked outside, she knew the heavens sided with the boy with the blue eyes.

------------------------------------------------------------

Saitou climbed the wooden gate of their house. It was an easy feat as he'd done it several times before, especially when he came home late at night. As he steadied himself, he immediately hinted at the smell of his home. It was an earthy smell but fresh. He noted how strong it was this time though, probably because the snow just thawed recently accenting the smell of the ground. He proceeded quietly into the house and saw his sister washing the dishes. He stood there momentarily watching her, as if he hasn't seen her for ages. Then he went and surveyed the remaining part of the house. To his dismay, Midori was nowhere to be found so he decided to just go to his room to take some of his belongings. The lock to his room was broken, rather it was broken by Tatsuo, who was always hinting that he was up to no good when he locked the doors. For once he was actually thankful the lock was broken so that there was no need to pick the lock. He pushed the door slowly and slid inside.

"Glad to see you're still alive Hajime."

Saitou wanted to hit his head on the wall that very moment, but instead he calmly faced his brother who was sitting on the far corner of the room. He half expected his brother immediately knock him off his feet, buy he continued to sit and started to light a cigarette.

"Here..." He threw a pack to the young man. "I know you came here in part for those."

Saitou picked it up and shoved it to his pocket. "You're right. I'm going."

"Where to this time?" Tatsuo kept his voice even.

"I'm looking for someone. I can't tarry much longer here." He tried to meet with Tatsuo's eyes but they were turned towards the window.

"You are looking for that tomboyish girl?" still monotonous.

Saitou was about to protest the "tomboy" part but decided against it. "Yes."

"Sou ka. Last I heard the police was looking for you because of kidnapping. You were last seen with her." Tatsuo now met his brother's amber eyes.

"I did not kidnap her. She insisted to come with me but came back here." Saitou answered, annoyance creeping into his voice as he became impatient.

"Sou ka... One more thing before you go. Where is father's katana?"

Saitou's eyes widened, he had left his katana back at the Shieitan when Hijikata asked him to lay his sword down. "I left it at Tama..."

Tatsuo almost smiled. "You did? That's good."

"Don't get me wrong. I plan to get it back." Hajime's eyes flared.

Tatsuo sighed. So he hasn't given it up after all.

Hajime turned and started to leave the room, he did not have time to chat with his brother. The whole event was uncomfortable anyway so there was no sense to stay much longer.

"MATTE! (Wait!)" Tatsuo was quick and passed Hajime in a second. "Sasue, prepare a bento for Hajime." He turned to look at his younger brother and left. "Wait here, I will prepare Hikaru."

Hajime was taken aback and could only nod. Hikaru was his brother's most prized possesion, the only one he would not sell regardless of the circumstance, his precious horse. He took a cigarette from his pocket and started smoking, contemplating the events that just happened.

----------------------------------------------------------

As Hijikata walked the corridors of the Shieitan, he examined the katana that was left by Saitou. The wooden sheath had a few knicks but when he took out the sword he noted how the blade was clean and unblemished. The katana itself was flexible enough and as he swung the sword the weight was all too familiar.

Interesting. The sword is not signed nor does it look like it has been specially crafted... To be able to get a japanese katana like this, he must've gone through several hundreds to find a specimen like this.

He sheathed the katana back into place and knocked on Okita's door.

"Come in!" answered the boy.

He found the two on the tatami sharing a cup of tea. "Sumimasen (Excuse me). Midori-san dozo." He handed the katana to Midori and left.

---------------------------------------------------------------

Not one word was passed between them again. Saitou nodded at his older brother and left. As his figure faded, Tatsuo is engulfed in their shared past.

*FLASHBACK*

Tatsuo peered into the room. His mother was standing beside his father who was kneeling on the floor. She had been crying all day and had been begging their father to come out, but he was immovable. He heard a short but intense argument earlier and was peeking to see if the anger had subsided. His mother saw him and beckoned him to come closer.

"Tatsuo... You're father has decided." his mother said between sobs.

He knew at once what she meant. He was old enough to know about "seppuku", what it means, but he did not understand why it was needed. He knew though that this day would come and prepared himself for the worst.

"Otou-san.."

Yuusuke did not turn back to look at his eldest son. "Tatsuo, when I am gone you will be the man of this house."

"HAI!" he replied in a short but loud manner.

"Can you get Hajime?" his father's voice almost croaked.

"Hai. Matte kudasai otou-san." He left going to his brother's room. He found the door locked though, so he placed his ears against the wooden door. He could hear sounds inside.

Is he crying?

"OPEN UP HAJIME! HURRY! IT'S IMPORTANT!"

His brother's voice did not respond, only sounds of things being thrown at the door was his little brother's response.

"OTOU-SAN WANTS TO SEE YOU! NOW HAJIME!" He tried kicking the door open but it was no use. Tatsuo's voice was getting shaky. Just like him, Hajime was old enough to know what was going to happen. Unfortunately, unlike him, his younger brother would not take the matter calmly.

"GO AWAY! I HATE YOU AND OTOU-SAN! GO AWAY!" the boy was still throwing a tantrum. Tatsuo could still hear him kicking and punching the walls and breaking things inside. Tatsuo gave the door one last shove but it would not open. Shimatta Hajime. Don't hate me too. Don't hate otou-san, you're his precious one...

Sighing he left his younger brother to his misery. His father will not wait any longer and Tatsuo wanted to be by his father's side at his last moment. He could hear the disappointment in his father's voice when he said Hajime would not come. Masu had closed the shoji door behind them to afford the three of them some privacy. As his father's dagger punctured and slit his stomach, Tatsuo heard him elicit a quiet and controlled cry of pain. Tatsuo was hoping that his father would die right there at that moment, but he was denied that too just like he was denied of having a living father. As Yuusuke's body fell, Masu caught him and settled his head on her lap while he bled himself to death. To Tatsuo it seemed like hours before his father finally succumbed to death, to him it almost looked like his father wanted to cling to life as long as he could. It was only after his mother started crying uncontrollably that he knew that his father has breathe his last breath, he let himself cry for that one instant.

Why otou-san? Why?

Tatsuo turned his back to his parents and as he opened the shoji, Hajime was standing right in front of him staring beyond him to the blood stained floor. He immediately wiped the tears of his face and also Hajime's. The boy looked up at him, his eyes watery again. He did not want Hajime to see him cry, so he gave him a quick hug and immediately left for his room.

TO REVIEWERS:

MissBehavin - I sure hope you didn't see the "real" Tatsuo coming.... I know. I know. I misled you to believe he's really a bad guy, but hey didn't I say before that he's just a jerk and I even hinted that Akio is much MUCH more of a jerk than Tatsuo is? So here's my imagination going wild on Hajime's past... I'm so mushy when it comes to Saitou-sama.... HEHEHEHE! Saitou will come back to the Shieitan for many reasons, as you already saw. About Okita, the Shinsengumi and the director... No I did not read the article on New-Type... I can't afford to ^_^ BUT I agree nonetheless or maybe the reason I'm leaning to that is because I have been watching PMK and this is like an after effect? Who knows? Thanks for updating "To Hazard a Guest"! I read it! It's really good. Aoshi's coming back.. Oh my... Hey get rid of Tsutomu already! (joke only)

Ooka-chan - So now what? I really don't know. The story is spanning longer than I thought. The plot was really simple in my head, but as I was writing things/ideas seemed to just pop up and I wanted to include it. Let me know if I'm dragging or making the story too long, so I can cure it while it's still early :O) Saitou-sama and Midori-san will meet again soon and we will get back on track with their relationship and with the main story. I wanted to clear some questions developed in earlier chapter that's why I needed Saitou to go back alone to Edo. They will have their own screen time and the story will revolve around Midori in the near future and then back to Saitou... Then I'll probably close it with what happened to them in the future. I'm not sure though how many chapters it's going to take. I feel like I'm only half-way through (BAD SIGN). I'm being too mushy I guess.... Thanks for reviewing!