DISCLAIMER: FIRST! I don't own Rurouni Kenshin nor Saitou Hajime (although I wish)... RK is owned by Nobuhiro Watsuki.
OTHER: Okay... To those reading this story.. I took off most of the authors notes so please just read the notes from prior chapters... Also since fanfiction has this thing against answering reviewers in the story... If you would like to see my answers to your review, please check my profile and there I will post my answers/thoughts. I hope you enjoy the story. Critiques please, please let me know... What you hate.. What you like.. What I need to work on...
~ or italics are thoughts
* others/sounds/etc
CHAPTER XXVII - Feelings
She road the carriage Souzi arranged for her that night. The young lad offered to accompany her but she refused profusely. She stared continuously at the passing shadows as the carriage swiftly threaded the road back home. She breathe heavily, wondering why there were no tears was coming out while she cursed each and every memory she had shared with Hajime.
~How could he be so fickle?
Fickle. That was the word that played in her mind as she replayed the events over and over again the last two months wondering if she had done something wrong. Nothing in life was fair, she knew that, but Hajime was different. At least she thought he was. He meant every word he said regardless of whether it was passion or scorn. In the short time that they have known each other, he never backed out of a situation.
~So why now?
She felt like a child staring at the shadows. A child lost and angry. Angry at the situation she put herself in. Angry at the misfortune she had caused her family for two months. Angry because eventhough she cursed him, she still loved him.
She finally arrived at her house. As she stepped off the carriage, she wondered why seeing her home again was an alienating experience. The house was dark and grim, nothing disturbed the deafening silence. The carriage left but she just stood there. She was needed here, not in Tama. She had responsibilities here, not back in Tama. She cringed for a moment, once she opens that door she will have to say goodbye to herself. Her wants, her needs and her dreams.
~I can still turn back. If I cuts across the alley, I can still catch the carriage.
She quietly laughed at herself. Scolded herself for being such a dreamer. There was nothing to go back to in Tama. A tear escaped her face as she slowly opened the gates.
"Who goes there?" A policeman asked gruffly.
~Run Midori. You can still go back.
Her lips wouldn't move but neither would her feet. She just stood there.
"Oh... That must be the girl that was missing." shouted the smaller officer running from the back.
Both men came rushing at her. They quickly took both of her arms and pulled her deeper into the garden. Their hands were rough and firm. The taller man slightly twisting her arm so that she would not get away. She let the tears come out quietly.
~So this is how it feels... to be like a prisoner... to be like a dog...
-------------------------------------------------------------
"Ahou! That's wrong!" Saitou took his sword and demonstrated the Hirazuki again for the hundredth time that day. His trainees followed his every movement almost perfectly this time.
"Kuso! You people are TOO slow!" Saitou cursed again.
Okita who had been sitting across the room continuously watched Saitou as he barked at his men early in the morning. He pitied them. They were actually doing quite well but Saitou would not settle for anything less than perfect.
"Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! I said like this!" Saitou did a lightning thrust with his sword.
Okita shook his head, he was amazed and disappointed at how Saitou EASILY got over losing Midori. In disgust he decided to scan the room instead. It was too early to hear curses in the dojo. The man obviously needed more sleep from his binge drinking last night, but Saitou wouldn't listen to him anyway. To his dismay though, there was nothing particularly interesting in the dojo. No one had arrived yet except for him and Saitou. He vaguely wondered if Saitou went from room to room and demanded his trainees to be in the dojo early. He sighed. He wish Sagara was there, it was always fun to watch Sagara fight with his trainees. A spear against a sword. Unfair but fun nonetheless.
"Souzi... Come help me with this will you?" Hijikata requested as he entered the dojo.
Souzi rolled his eyes and pretended not to hear.
"Souzi!"
He looked at Hijikata and settled his chin on the palm of his hand.
Toshi couldn't do anything but sigh. Souzi was still sulking. He looked towards his right and noticed Saitou was already in the middle of training. He smiled to himself.
~That's it Saitou. That's what you have to do. Once you get over this, you can get over anything.
"You enjoy this Toshizo?" Okita asked, clearly annoyed at Hijikata's smile.
"You're not your usual safe today Souzi..." Hijikata put down the box he was carrying and sat beside Okita.
"Nor have you for quite a long time now."
"Don't let your feelings get the best of you Souzi."
Okita stared at the wooden floor. Hijikata was a friend and an elder brother to him. Still he was pissed.
"Would you trade her life to satisfy your cravings for meat buns, miso soup, yams and inagi?" Hijikata asked in a softer and thoughtful voice.
"No." Okita frowned. He hated it when Hijikata was right.
"Look at Saitou." Hijikata turned his attention across the room. "Do you think right now you are a better person than he is?"
"I never said anything Hijikata-san." the boy retaliated.
Hijikata smiled. They were making progress. Okita only called him Toshizo twice, once when Souzi lost for the first time in the dojo and now after losing his onee-chan.
"I've met women before Souzi, a number of them. There were a few who were hard to part with. He has only met one, no doubt an important part of him. It is hard to let go." Hijikata paused and looked back at Okita. "He is dealing with their parting his own way. A productive way. I am impressed."
Okita looked back at Hijikata a bit puzzled.
"His wound is deeper than yours. When you find someone you will understand. I hope though that you do not go through the same experience." Hijikata stood up and started emptying the boxes he brought earlier. In them where chainmails and breast plates.
Okita looked back at Saitou. His mind understood where Hijikata came from, his heart didn't. He stood up and helped Hijikata, he was after all a friend and a brother who never lead him wrong.
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It was already past midnight. The guards had deposited her into the house and locked the door behind them. A young man carried a candle into the living room wondering why there was a commotion outside. As the light reached Midori, Yuuta came to her side quickly.
"Onee-san?" Yuuta stood dumbfounded. "Why did come back?"
Midori not finding an answer shook her head. Yuuta placed the candle holder down on the table and gave his sister a hug. As they hugged, he could hear her sniffle in the background.
"There... Don't cry..." Yuuta patted her back. He wanted so much to comfort her and tell her everything was going to be alright but that would only be a lie.
Midori broke the embrace and faced her brother. "I'm so glad you're okay Yuuta. I'm sorry. If I'd have known, I would've come sooner."
"No.. Don't think about that now..." Yuuta smiled for her. "We would've hold out no matter what. You shouldn't have come back."
His sister looked away. Yuuta sensing that he had said the wrong thing wanted to hit himself.
"Onee-san... You know... I'm glad you're here."
"Thanks Yuuta."
"So what..." Yuuta did not finish his question. Obviously whatever was bothering his sister, she did not want to talk about it right now. "I'll wake otou-san and oka-san... Wait here. I'm sure they'll be happy to see you."
He left her standing in the dark living room and came back moments later with her father and mother. Her mother broke out into a cry. Touching her daughters face, tracing it's lines as if to ascertain the fact that her daughter indeed had come back home. Her father did not approach her but stood beside them not saying a word.
"Otou-san..." Yuuta nudged his father closer to Midori.
"Otou-san... Tadaima..." Midori said meekly and bowed to Kyoda.
"Okari..." Kyoda wanted to touch his daughter but restrained himself. "Ah you're room is as it was when you left. You should take a quick bath and retire."
"Hai..." Midori watched her father leave them. She wondered if he was angry at her.
"Midori... I'll go prepare some food for you. You must be hungry." Her mother held her face again. Tears of joy streamed down her face as she left for the kitchen.
"Yuuta.."
"Huh?"
"Send word to Kaneda-san first thing in the morning. Ask him if he could bring Akio." the words came out of her mouth in a trance.
Yuuta's face was etched with concern, he was not sure what happened to her but whatever it was, it was not good. "Don't think about that right now."
Midori forced herself to smile at Yuuta. "Don't worry everything will be fine. Oh when you talk to otou-san, please tell him too."
Yuuta nodded to his sister and led her into the kitchen. He could not help but hide the frown in his face.
OTHER: Okay... To those reading this story.. I took off most of the authors notes so please just read the notes from prior chapters... Also since fanfiction has this thing against answering reviewers in the story... If you would like to see my answers to your review, please check my profile and there I will post my answers/thoughts. I hope you enjoy the story. Critiques please, please let me know... What you hate.. What you like.. What I need to work on...
~ or italics are thoughts
* others/sounds/etc
CHAPTER XXVII - Feelings
She road the carriage Souzi arranged for her that night. The young lad offered to accompany her but she refused profusely. She stared continuously at the passing shadows as the carriage swiftly threaded the road back home. She breathe heavily, wondering why there were no tears was coming out while she cursed each and every memory she had shared with Hajime.
~How could he be so fickle?
Fickle. That was the word that played in her mind as she replayed the events over and over again the last two months wondering if she had done something wrong. Nothing in life was fair, she knew that, but Hajime was different. At least she thought he was. He meant every word he said regardless of whether it was passion or scorn. In the short time that they have known each other, he never backed out of a situation.
~So why now?
She felt like a child staring at the shadows. A child lost and angry. Angry at the situation she put herself in. Angry at the misfortune she had caused her family for two months. Angry because eventhough she cursed him, she still loved him.
She finally arrived at her house. As she stepped off the carriage, she wondered why seeing her home again was an alienating experience. The house was dark and grim, nothing disturbed the deafening silence. The carriage left but she just stood there. She was needed here, not in Tama. She had responsibilities here, not back in Tama. She cringed for a moment, once she opens that door she will have to say goodbye to herself. Her wants, her needs and her dreams.
~I can still turn back. If I cuts across the alley, I can still catch the carriage.
She quietly laughed at herself. Scolded herself for being such a dreamer. There was nothing to go back to in Tama. A tear escaped her face as she slowly opened the gates.
"Who goes there?" A policeman asked gruffly.
~Run Midori. You can still go back.
Her lips wouldn't move but neither would her feet. She just stood there.
"Oh... That must be the girl that was missing." shouted the smaller officer running from the back.
Both men came rushing at her. They quickly took both of her arms and pulled her deeper into the garden. Their hands were rough and firm. The taller man slightly twisting her arm so that she would not get away. She let the tears come out quietly.
~So this is how it feels... to be like a prisoner... to be like a dog...
-------------------------------------------------------------
"Ahou! That's wrong!" Saitou took his sword and demonstrated the Hirazuki again for the hundredth time that day. His trainees followed his every movement almost perfectly this time.
"Kuso! You people are TOO slow!" Saitou cursed again.
Okita who had been sitting across the room continuously watched Saitou as he barked at his men early in the morning. He pitied them. They were actually doing quite well but Saitou would not settle for anything less than perfect.
"Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! I said like this!" Saitou did a lightning thrust with his sword.
Okita shook his head, he was amazed and disappointed at how Saitou EASILY got over losing Midori. In disgust he decided to scan the room instead. It was too early to hear curses in the dojo. The man obviously needed more sleep from his binge drinking last night, but Saitou wouldn't listen to him anyway. To his dismay though, there was nothing particularly interesting in the dojo. No one had arrived yet except for him and Saitou. He vaguely wondered if Saitou went from room to room and demanded his trainees to be in the dojo early. He sighed. He wish Sagara was there, it was always fun to watch Sagara fight with his trainees. A spear against a sword. Unfair but fun nonetheless.
"Souzi... Come help me with this will you?" Hijikata requested as he entered the dojo.
Souzi rolled his eyes and pretended not to hear.
"Souzi!"
He looked at Hijikata and settled his chin on the palm of his hand.
Toshi couldn't do anything but sigh. Souzi was still sulking. He looked towards his right and noticed Saitou was already in the middle of training. He smiled to himself.
~That's it Saitou. That's what you have to do. Once you get over this, you can get over anything.
"You enjoy this Toshizo?" Okita asked, clearly annoyed at Hijikata's smile.
"You're not your usual safe today Souzi..." Hijikata put down the box he was carrying and sat beside Okita.
"Nor have you for quite a long time now."
"Don't let your feelings get the best of you Souzi."
Okita stared at the wooden floor. Hijikata was a friend and an elder brother to him. Still he was pissed.
"Would you trade her life to satisfy your cravings for meat buns, miso soup, yams and inagi?" Hijikata asked in a softer and thoughtful voice.
"No." Okita frowned. He hated it when Hijikata was right.
"Look at Saitou." Hijikata turned his attention across the room. "Do you think right now you are a better person than he is?"
"I never said anything Hijikata-san." the boy retaliated.
Hijikata smiled. They were making progress. Okita only called him Toshizo twice, once when Souzi lost for the first time in the dojo and now after losing his onee-chan.
"I've met women before Souzi, a number of them. There were a few who were hard to part with. He has only met one, no doubt an important part of him. It is hard to let go." Hijikata paused and looked back at Okita. "He is dealing with their parting his own way. A productive way. I am impressed."
Okita looked back at Hijikata a bit puzzled.
"His wound is deeper than yours. When you find someone you will understand. I hope though that you do not go through the same experience." Hijikata stood up and started emptying the boxes he brought earlier. In them where chainmails and breast plates.
Okita looked back at Saitou. His mind understood where Hijikata came from, his heart didn't. He stood up and helped Hijikata, he was after all a friend and a brother who never lead him wrong.
--------------------------------------------------------
It was already past midnight. The guards had deposited her into the house and locked the door behind them. A young man carried a candle into the living room wondering why there was a commotion outside. As the light reached Midori, Yuuta came to her side quickly.
"Onee-san?" Yuuta stood dumbfounded. "Why did come back?"
Midori not finding an answer shook her head. Yuuta placed the candle holder down on the table and gave his sister a hug. As they hugged, he could hear her sniffle in the background.
"There... Don't cry..." Yuuta patted her back. He wanted so much to comfort her and tell her everything was going to be alright but that would only be a lie.
Midori broke the embrace and faced her brother. "I'm so glad you're okay Yuuta. I'm sorry. If I'd have known, I would've come sooner."
"No.. Don't think about that now..." Yuuta smiled for her. "We would've hold out no matter what. You shouldn't have come back."
His sister looked away. Yuuta sensing that he had said the wrong thing wanted to hit himself.
"Onee-san... You know... I'm glad you're here."
"Thanks Yuuta."
"So what..." Yuuta did not finish his question. Obviously whatever was bothering his sister, she did not want to talk about it right now. "I'll wake otou-san and oka-san... Wait here. I'm sure they'll be happy to see you."
He left her standing in the dark living room and came back moments later with her father and mother. Her mother broke out into a cry. Touching her daughters face, tracing it's lines as if to ascertain the fact that her daughter indeed had come back home. Her father did not approach her but stood beside them not saying a word.
"Otou-san..." Yuuta nudged his father closer to Midori.
"Otou-san... Tadaima..." Midori said meekly and bowed to Kyoda.
"Okari..." Kyoda wanted to touch his daughter but restrained himself. "Ah you're room is as it was when you left. You should take a quick bath and retire."
"Hai..." Midori watched her father leave them. She wondered if he was angry at her.
"Midori... I'll go prepare some food for you. You must be hungry." Her mother held her face again. Tears of joy streamed down her face as she left for the kitchen.
"Yuuta.."
"Huh?"
"Send word to Kaneda-san first thing in the morning. Ask him if he could bring Akio." the words came out of her mouth in a trance.
Yuuta's face was etched with concern, he was not sure what happened to her but whatever it was, it was not good. "Don't think about that right now."
Midori forced herself to smile at Yuuta. "Don't worry everything will be fine. Oh when you talk to otou-san, please tell him too."
Yuuta nodded to his sister and led her into the kitchen. He could not help but hide the frown in his face.