Disclaimer: I own nothing but the plot and the kids.
Summary: All flowers die, but sometimes they just go away. In the case of Bill Weasley, his flower left him alone with five children.
Loneliness
It seemed so "modern," really. Bill Weasley was a single father. Lots of witches and wizards these days were single parents. Of course, most of those lost their spouses during the Second War. Bill's situation was different…the opposite really.
He and Fleur had married in the midst of the War. He wanted to give her children, so that, in case he died, she would always have part of him with her. They got pregnant straight away, and Marie was born less than a year after they married. Luc had been conceived during the post-war celebration that had lasted for weeks. Two years after that, twins Bridget and Bradley arrived.
Then, all Bill's brothers and sister got married by order of the Ministry and had children within a year. Suddenly, Bill felt left out, and he convinced Fleur to have another baby. Nicole was the result, and Bill finally felt that his family was complete.
He finally learned to love his job at Gringott's in London. Part of this was working with Hermione Granger, who later became his sister-in-law. The two had developed a close friendship, but Bill couldn't even tell her that Fleur had left him.
It had been over a month now. He still hadn't gotten accustomed to waking up alone. With all the kids, except Nicole, away at school, it had been easy to keep the secret. He hated lying to everyone, especially Nicole, by saying that Fleur had gone to France to care for her ailing mother. In all honesty, he had no idea if her mother was well or not. He hadn't spoken to the woman in over a year.
Bill poured himself a cup of strong coffee. Once again, he hadn't slept much last night. He stared at the black liquid steaming in the mug and sighed loudly. He knew he should get dressed and wake Nicole up to go to his mother's, but he couldn't find the strength to get out of the chair.
"Daddy?" Nicole's small voice broke through his reverie, and he turned to look at her. She had Fleur's blonde hair, but Nicole's was curlier, like her Uncle Charlie's. She had her father's bright brown eyes, and his congenial smile. In spite of his troubles, he smiled at her.
"What is it, sweetheart?" he asked.
"Can you do my hair? I did everything else myself," she said proudly. It was true; she had managed to dress herself and even tie her shoelaces, but her hair wasn't fixed.
"I see that," Bill said, trying to sound upbeat. "And you look lovely. But let's see what we can do about that hair."
Nicole turned around so Bill could brush her hair and tie it back. He pulled it into a ponytail, fastening it with the blue ribbon she'd brought. He was pleased with his success, but when she turned around, Nicole was frowning.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"Mummy doesn't do it like that," she said. "She braids it."
Bill sighed and pulled her onto his lap, stroking her head. "Well, Mummy isn't here, and I'm afraid Daddy isn't good with girls' hair," he explained. "We'll ask Grandmum to fix it when we get there, all right?"
This seemed to satisfy Nicole, and she bounced off his lap, kissed his cheek and went in search of her doll to take with her.
When they arrived at the Burrow, Nicole went to play in the living room while Molly pulled Bill aside.
"You haven't said in a while, but how is Fleur's mother doing?" she asked.
"I'm not entirely sure," he replied. "The same, I think." It wasn't exactly a lie, but it wasn't the truth either.
Molly's eyes narrowed slightly, and she gave her son a hard look. "But Fleur's been gone over a month now. When is she coming home?"
Bill sighed and played absently with his wedding ring. "I don't know, Mum, but I don't really have time to discuss it. I'm running late," he said irritably.
"All right, Bill," Molly replied. "I'm just worried about you. You don't look well."
"Thanks, Mum, for your concern," he said, kissing her cheek. "But I'm fine. I'll be back this evening for Nicole." He went to kiss his daughter good-bye before Apparating to work.
At Gringott's, his "other mum," as he affectionately called Hermione, wasn't much better.
"Bill, you look terrible," she commented first thing.
"Thank you, Hermione," he said with false cheeriness. "I guess I'm not sleeping well."
"Still?" she asked. "Well, I can't say that I blame you. I can't sleep unless George is next to me. You must really miss Fleur."
"Yes, I do," Bill replied softly. His hurt and sadness swelled in his chest, and he cleared his throat nervously so he wouldn't show his emotions.
"When's she coming back?" Hermione asked.
"I don't know," he replied curtly. "If you don't mind, I have several things I need to get done this morning. So if you'll excuse me." With that, he went into his office and shut the door behind him.
He sat down at his desk, laid his head upon it and cried for the first time since Fleur had left him.
Meanwhile, Hermione stood where Bill had left her thinking. Something wasn't right with him. She got the impression he was hiding something from the rest of the family. She knew that Bill was a proud man and would never openly discuss something that was bothering him. The only way he would talk is if someone whom he trusted confronted him.
With that in mind, Hermione went to her fireplace, threw some powder into it and yelled, "Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes, George Weasley's office!"
Moments later, her husband's head appeared in the fire. "Hermione!" he exclaimed. "Miss me already?"
"Always, George," she said with a wink. "Are you incredibly busy?"
"Not at the moment," he replied. "Something the matter?"
"Yes, I'm worried about Bill. He looks awful, but when I tried to ask him about it, he wouldn't talk about it," she said in a rush.
"Hermione, I'm sure it's nothing," George replied. "I'm sure he just misses Fleur."
"But that's it, isn't it?" his wife replied. "If he misses her that much, why not go and see her? I think something else is wrong, something bigger."
"Well, what do you want me to do about it?" George asked. He knew Hermione had a good sense about people, especially people she knew well.
"Talk to him?" she asked, biting her lip. She knew George would balk at the idea, but this was important.
"Me?" he asked. "Bill wouldn't confide in me. Why don't you ask Charlie? They've always been closer."
"Because Charlie's in Romania, and he and Cassie are busy with the new baby," Hermione said exasperatedly. "Please, George? Just come by to take me to lunch, only I'll be gone. Then ask Bill."
George thought for a moment and sighed. "Fine," he relented. "But it's not going to work."
"George, have you forgotten that it was Bill who convinced me to give you a chance when we got married?" she asked. "He'll talk to you if you just ask him."
"Okay, okay," he said. "But you'd better make this up to me later."
"We'll see," she said with a smirk.
George's head disappeared from her fire, and she went back to her work.
Bill jumped three meters when someone knocked on his door at noon. He'd barely gotten any work done that morning; he couldn't concentrate. He kept dwelling on the sad situation he found himself in.
He was rather surprised when George opened the door and poked his head in. "You haven't seen Hermione, have you?" he asked.
Bill shook his head. "Not since this morning," he replied.
George sighed, shoved his hands in his pockets and slowly entered Bill's office. "I was supposed to meet her for lunch, but I guess she got tired of waiting," he said casually. "Say, now that I've been stood up, why don't we go?"
Bill almost immediately said no, but he glanced around his office. He cooped himself in it all morning, and he needed to get out before he lost his sanity. "Sure, little brother," he said, standing up and throwing down his quill.
The two red-heads meandered down Diagon Alley, looking for somewhere to eat. The Leaky Cauldron was too crowded, so they decided on an out of the way outdoor café.
Once they'd ordered, George shifted uncomfortably in his seat. He hated confrontation, and he had no idea how to broach the subject of Bill's unhappiness,
"So…" he began, "I haven't seen you in a while. How've you been?"
Bill sighed and forced a smile. "Oh, fine," he said. "You know, a bit lonely with Fleur gone, but her mum needed her."
George suddenly realized something. Bill's depression seemed to begin just before Fleur left. He wondered if perhaps they had problems, and she left to take some time apart. He remembered when he and Hermione had invited everyone over to tell that they were expecting another baby. Bill had brought Nicole over that evening by himself. Fleur had come later, though it had been obvious that Bill hadn't known where she was.
"Well, when she gets back, you'll all have to come over for dinner," George said conversationally. "You know, like when Hermione and I announced the new baby?"
That did it, George noticed. Bill's expression darkened and he began clenching his fists together on top of the table. He raised his head to look George in the eyes, and George saw a hollow man staring at him.
"Bill," he said, "what is it? I know something's wrong. We're worried about you."
"George, I know you mean well, you and Hermione," Bill replied. "But it really isn't any of your business. And I don't want to talk about it."
George chewed the inside of his cheek for a moment. On the one hand, he knew Bill wasn't someone to anger, but on the other hand, something was definitely wrong with his brother.
"Bill, I'm not trying to pry," George said hesitantly, "but I really want to help you. You've always been there for everyone else, and now I want to be there for you. I know we haven't been especially close, but you and Hermione are. And if I go home tonight and tell her you've said you're fine, she's going to pop over to your house and mother you do death. So you can either talk to me, or deal with my wife, which isn't something I'd suggest," he finished with a smile.
Bill sighed and looked at his younger brother. When exactly had George become a responsible man, he wondered.
"Fine," he relented. "You want to know?" George nodded, and Bill stood, saying, "Let's get out of here and get a drink." He started to walk away quickly, so George followed after tossing some Galleons onto the table for their uneaten lunches.
Bill chose a very seedy pub on the edge of the Alley, and he led George to a table in the back. After ordering two shots of Firewhiskey, Bill spoke softly.
"The day you and Hermione announced the baby, you remember that Fleur and I didn't arrive together?" he asked.
George nodded, stifling the proud smile of being right.
"Well, I had no idea where she'd been," Bill continued. "I picked Nicole up from the Burrow that afternoon, after Mum Floo'ed and said Fleur hadn't been there all day. I was worried, but when she arrived at your place, I was relieved. Until we got home."
He paused as their drinks arrived, and Bill tossed his shot back, grimacing at the taste, while George let his sit on the table.
"After we put Nicole to bed, Fleur told me she was leaving," Bill said. "I assumed that her Mum was sick again, but she said that she was leaving me. She wanted a divorce."
George's jaw dropped, and he struggled to make sense of what he was hearing. "Why, Bill?" he asked stupidly.
"Said she was tired of being stuck at home all day; tired of raising kids; and tired of being married and boring," Bill spat. "Said she'd met someone who made her feel alive and beautiful again, and she didn't want me anymore."
He picked up George's drink and tossed it back, this time, grimacing less. "I had no idea she felt like that. She never told me; I guess she wanted me to read her bloody mind." He paused, signaling the waitress for another round. "D'you remember a chap from Hogwarts called Roger Davies?"
"Yeah," George said with a nod. "A Ravenclaw, a year behind me in school. Why? What's he got to do with anything?"
"I knew that he and Fleur had gone to the Yule Ball together all those years ago, but I didn't she still held some feeling for him. She told me she was leaving me for him. Apparently, she ran into him one day in Diagon Alley and decided to boff him."
The second round of drinks arrived, and Bill downed them both straight away. "She's filed divorce papers," he said finally.
"What?" George asked in disbelief.
"That sodding harlot is divorcing me," Bill said bitterly.
"But what about the kids?" George asked, trying to discreetly discourage the waitress from bringing any more drinks.
"She doesn't want them," Bill replied. "She's given me full custody. They don't know yet. How am I supposed to tell them?" he asked.
"Merlin, Bill," George said. "I had no idea. What can we do? Can we take Nicole for you for a while, until you get yourself together?"
Bill smiled sadly at George. "No thanks, mate," he said, the liquor starting to hit him. "This is my life, my problem, and I'll deal with it."
"But Bill, you've got to tell everyone," George said. "You've got to tell your kids."
"I don't know how," he admitted. "I don't know how to tell them I've failed them."
"But you haven't," George insisted, resting his hand atop his brother's. "It's their mum who's failed them, and they'll realize it, maybe not at first, but eventually." He sighed, taking in Bill's glazed-over eyes and inebriated expression. "But first, why don't I take you home, so you can rest? I'll let Hermione know you won't be back today."
Bill's eyes widened, and he smiled. "Yes, you're right, little brother. I'm too drunk to work this afternoon."
Later that evening, after Bill had slept off his intoxication, George arrived with Nicole in tow.
"Thought I'd do you a favor and let you avoid Mum at the same time," George said with a smile. "How're you?"
"Better," Bill admitted. "Since when have you been such a good listener?"
George smirked. "Since I married Hermione," he quipped. His expression grew serious, and his voice lowered. "Listen, I know you want to do this in your own time, but why don't you go up to Hogwart's tomorrow, for Easter holidays? You can all talk and have it out then."
Bill stretched and smiled at Nicole before turning to his brother. "That sounds like a good idea, George. Thanks for everything," he said.
"Anytime, Bill," George said. "Like I said, you've been there for all of us at some point, and I'm here for you anytime you need me."
The two brothers hugged, and George Apparated home, leaving Bill and his youngest daughter alone.
The next morning, after contacting Headmaster Snape, Bill and Nicole Floo'ed to Hogwarts. Ron and Katie had discreetly excused themselves and their children, leaving Bill and his five children alone in their quarters.
Once everyone was seated, Bill looked sadly at each of them. Just as he was about to speak, Marie, the eldest at sixteen, spoke.
"Dad," she said, "does this have something to do with Mum?"
Bill marveled at her astuteness, and answered, "Yes, Marie, it does."
Luc looked to his older sister, bewildered, as the twins leaned forward in their chairs.
"Well, let's talk about it, hmm?" Bill said nervously. He picked Nicole up and sat her on his lap on the sofa. He stroked her hair and smiled weakly. "Kids, Mummy's gone, and she's not coming back," he said simply.
Nicole looked confused for a moment. "Did she die?" she asked.
"No, she didn't die," Bill answered. "She's just gone away."
Bradley clutched Bridget's hand. "Where did she go?" he asked.
"I don't know, Bradley," Bill answered.
Nicole's face started to screw up, and tears fell from her eyes. "But doesn't she love us anymore?"
Bill hugged her to his chest while she cried and whispered in her ear, "I'm sure Mummy misses you very much, and I don't know why she went away. But wherever she is, I know that she loves you very much."
"She didn't even come to say good-bye to us," Marie said angrily. "When did she leave?"
"A month ago," Bill said. "Now, I haven't told anyone else in the family yet. Your Uncle George knows, but that's it. Whenever you're ready, we can tell everyone that your Mum and I… Well, we're getting a divorce."
"But I want her to come back!" Nicole wailed.
"Shhh, darling," Bill soothed. "I do too, but she's not going to. But no matter what happens, Nicole, I love you more than anything in the world. And I'm never leaving, and I will always be here for you. I love you all so much."
Through her tears, Nicole hugged him tighter. "I love you too, Daddy. I'm sorry Mummy hurt you too."
"Thank you, baby," Bill said as a large lump formed in his throat.
The other children hugged their father and cried for their mother. Marie kissed Bill's cheek and said, "We're never leaving you either, Daddy. We love you."
Bill smiled to himself, in spite of the family's tears. For them, he would always be thankful to Fleur. No matter how she'd hurt him, she'd given him these five wonderful children, and he would always love her for that. He knew that as long as he had his children, he would be okay.
A/N: Sorry, the angst is back. They couldn't all be happy, now could they?