Episode 2: Attendance

Gimpy hummed as he scanned the listings on eSell. It had been a slow stretch for Star Wars items on the auction service, and today's search hadn't changed that. He saw nothing available that he didn't have already or actually wanted. After all he had no use for children's size 6 Chewbacca print underwear, and had no need for yet another standard Han Solo figure.

His search was interrupted by a knock on the door. "Come in," he called out.

Mump walked in, carrying an envelope. "Sir, you'd better look at this," he said nervously. "It's from the Assistant Dean."

"Hmmm, probably wants to consult me on some important matter that only I can help with."

Mump responded as he imagined Gimpy wanted him to. "You're probably right, sir." But what he was actually thinking was Oh brother! Gimpy might be the leader of what Rocko, and sometimes Nitz, refered to as the "Tekerson Geek Squad," but sometimes his ego was too much even for them.

Gimpy opened the letter and began reading. A perplexed expression appeared on his face. "The hell? They want to see me about my classroom attendance."

Should have seen that coming, thought Mump.

Gimpy sat in the office of the Assistant Dean, Professor MacKinnon. He had arranged an appointment as quickly as possible, wanting to get whatever problem they had with him resolved.

The balding professor pushed his reading glasses further up his nose. "I'd like to thank you, Mr. Taylor, for coming in so promptly."

"I'm always ready to cooperate with the administration," Gimpy responded. He hoped he didn't sound too ingratiating. "So there's a problem with my attendance?"

MacKinnon nodded. "Yes, it has come to our attention that you aren't physically attending your classes, other than in rare circumstances."

"How is that a problem? I'm doing the assignments, taking the exams, and so forth."

"Indeed you are, Mr. Taylor." The professor took off his glasses. "However, there is more to taking a course than simply doing the required coursework and taking the exams. We expect people who are given a space to study at Tekerson proper to actually make an effort to physically take part in their classes. We do of course have distance education opportunities, where students can take courses at locations in other parts of the state and country, but you are not currently enrolled in such a program."

Gimpy didn't like the sound of this. "So what am I expected to do?"

"Quite simply we expect you to show up regularly for your classes. If you don't I'm afraid we'll have to suspend you pending disciplinary action." Professor MacKinnon looked down at a file folder on his desk. "Given that your records indicate a similar pattern last year I'm afraid its entirely likely you'll be expelled, although you would likely be allowed to reapply at a later date, or for a distance education program."

Gimpy slumped back into his chair. Being expelled would mean losing a year. "Will that be all, sir?"

"For now, yes." The professor smiled at him. "If there is anything we can do to help you resolve this situation please let us know.

Gimpy walked out of the office. He was in big trouble, and had no idea what to do about it. This would never have happened if we'd moved onto that platform. Stupid government, stupid 1 million bucks we didn't have, he thought angrily.

"Can you believe it?" Gimpy asked angrily from the webcam popup on Nitz's computer screen. "They want me to physically attend class!"

Nitz shook his head. "Oh, those horrible people," he said with an exaggerated tone of disbelief in his voice. "Actually expecting someone who attends their school to actually show up for class."

Rocko, who was sitting in Nitz's desk chair, laughed. "Geez, Gimpy, even I show up for class. Yeah, I may miss half of 'em, and I'm hung over half the time I do go, but I show up."

"That's easy for you to say!" Gimpy shot back. "You know what I'm like."

"Come off it, Gimpy," Nitz responded, his annoyance obvious. "You never had any trouble showing up for high school. But a week at Tekerson and suddenly you became Mr. Shut In. Sorry, but I don't buy it."

"And here I thought I'd get some sympathy from you!" Gimpy responded angrily. "Thanks a lot!" With that the popup winked out.

"Ohoh, now you're in trouble, buddy," Rocko snickered. "He might go screw with your credit rating or something."

Nitz leaned back against the wall by his bed. "Sorry, but I think Gimpy's being an idiot." He looked up as Jesse walked in the room. "Hey, Jesse."

She smiled. "So, what's up with Gimpy that's got you so bitchy?"

Nitz snorted. "The administration at Tekerson want him to actually attend classes and he's upset about it." He slipped his hands between his head and the wall. "As if its some great horror to actually sit in a classroom."

"So how does he take his classes if he's not in the classroom?" Jesse asked in confusion.

"I think one of the Geek Squad goes in with a laptop and a video camera and feeds it back to him via the 'Net," replied Nitz. "I think they hand in his assignments for him too." The phone on his desk rang, and Nitz jumped up to grab it before Rocko could. "Hello? Hey, Kimmy."

Jesse's shoulders slumped. She had come to ask him if he wanted to catch a movie with Dan and her, but she guessed he'd be soon running out the door to do the bidding of the Ditzy Redhead.

"What time?" Nitz asked, looking at his watch. "Sure, I can be there. Okay, talk to you in a bit." He put down the phone and grabbed his jacket from the end of the bed. "Sorry, guys, gotta run. Kimmy wants me to go to an art show with her, and it starts pretty quick. Lock up when you leave, Rocko."

"Sure, Nitz," Rocko replied as Nitz ran out the door. Rocko turned to look at Jesse. "You were gonna ask him to go do something."

Jesse sighed. "Yeah, but it was no biggie. There's a new kung fu flick out that Dan and I are gonna go see, and I was going to ask him if he wanted to come along."

"Still pisses you off though."

Jesse chuckled. "No surprise you'd guess that. You're used to having women pissed at you."

Rocko smiled, not minding Jesse's teasing today for some reason. "Hey, everyone's gotta have a special skill. Mine's pissing chicks off."

Nitz walked beside Kimmy as she carefully studied each picture in the gallery. As much as he enjoyed being with her he found himself getting increasingly bored. The show featured various pieces by local abstract artists and she seemed utterly determined to give each one an extended study.

Nitz didn't dismiss the abstract pieces out of hand, and in fact found some of them rather interesting. But Kimmy seemed to consider every one of them to be equally of interest, while Nitz thought many of them were bad art. The one they were standing by at the moment, called "Words of Energy," looked like an orange piece of paper with a blue stripe painted down the middle. He couldn't see it as a "bold statement on the electronic age" as Kimmy had quoted from the exhibit booklet.

"Oh, there's Ken! I haven't talked to him in hours!" exclaimed Kimmy.

That was another thing that annoyed Nitz. It seemed like half the patrons in the gallery were friends of Kimmy's, and she just had to talk to all of them. Wasn't she supposed to be paying attention mainly to him, especially since she had asked him out?

Part of him thought he was complaining about nothing. He was with Kimmy Burton, KIMMY BURTON!! His dream girl. He'd wanted to go out with her forever, and finally he was getting the chance! What more could he ask for?

Unnoticed by Nitz as he followed Kimmy around was Kruger. The curly haired young man shook his head as he watched them. So he is going out with her. Why the #$% is he with that twit when he could have Jesse, he thought as he looked at one of the paintings.

Jesse walked into her dorm room. She had enjoyed the movie, but she was still annoyed Nitz hadn't come along. She smiled as she noticed a new addition to the décor, a bass guitar sitting on a stand. She bent down to look at the signature scrawled in black felt tip marker on the upper half of the body.

"Pretty cool huh?" asked the young woman who walked in the door, drying off her damp brown hair with a towel. "My fav bass player, Tony Levin, signed that. Not only that, he's got a Musicman Stingray with a serial number 3 away from that one."

"Hi, Lisa," said Jesse to her current roommate. "For once we're both here and awake at the same time."

Lisa laughed. "Yeah, I know I keep some odd hours."

Jesse nodded in agreement. "So what is up with that? Usually you come in after I've gone to sleep, and I leave in the morning while you're still asleep."

Lisa sat down on her bed. "Well, I've got my classes arranged so they're all in the afternoon or early evening. I'm in a band, as you might have guessed by that thing being her," she said, pointing to her bass. "So by doing that I can do stuff with the band, a few gigs even, in the evenings and actually be awake when I go to class. Its working well so far, and it doesn't seem to bug you when I come in late."

"Nah, don't worry about it," replied Jesse with a dismissive wave of her hand. "Any roommate is better than that freakshow Charity I roomed with last year."

Lisa frowned. "Someone told me she got arrested, and that's why she's not here this year."

Jesse nodded. "Yeah, she's obsessed with some guy named Jonah. She broke into his house during the summer and got busted for breaking and entering." Jesse leaned closer to Lisa and gave her a conspiratorial look. "An old classmate of her's told me the cops supposedly found her in the poor guy's bedroom, naked, and rolling around on a pile of his clothing while feeling herself up."

Lisa made a face of disgust. "Ick."

Jesse nodded in agreement. "Yeah, ick."

"So, how are you? I saw you earlier and you looked a bit pissed off about something," Lisa said as she threw her towel over her chair.

"Ah, its really no big deal," replied Jesse with a shrug. "I was going to ask my friend Nitz to go to a movie with me and another buddy but he ran off to go be with his girlfriend, who I really don't like much." Jesse shook her head. "There's just something about her that gets on my nerves."

Lisa nodded, a sly look on her face. "Yeah, Kimmy tends to have that effect on a lot of people."

"Oh, so you know Ki...." Jesse suddenly let out a long sigh and started rapping herself on the head with her knuckles. "Grrrr, I am such an idiot sometimes! I should have guessed someone with the last name Burton might be related to her."

"Yeah, Kimmy's my cousin," said Lisa with a laugh. "But don't worry about it. Yeah, she's family, I love her, but I'm not gonna deny she can be as annoying as hell. So if you feel the need to vent about her, go ahead. It'll stay strictly between us." A smirk appeared on her face. "Just like anything she'd gripe about you to me would."

Jesse laughed. "Touche!"

Gimpy looked at his gathered minions. "Gentlemen, the administration of our school expects me to attend classes in the flesh. Since I do not want to do so we must find a way to make it appear as if I am doing so. I understand some of you already have solutions to propose."

One of them, a very tall young man with messy brown hair stepped forward. "Yes, sir, I do. Oh, by the way, I'm Billy, and I'm a freshman."

Gimpy nodded. "Yes, I thought you looked new. Go on."

Billy walked out the door of Gimpy's room and walked back in towing a metal disk the diameter of a garbage can lid, and about a foot and a half thick, that rode on metal wheels. "This is a holographic generator sir, courtesy of the Tekerson electronics lab." He bent down and flipped a switch. Instantly an exact 3D duplicate of Gimpy appeared. The assembled crowded ooohed and aaahed as they circled the image. It was the exact dimensions of Gimpy and appeared completely solid. "With a bit of practice we should be able to roll it in without being noticed. And it has audio and motion control inputs, so it can mimic you talking and moving by remote control, so you'll be able to interact with the class without leaving your room."

"Excellent!" chortled Gimpy, grinning widely and rubbing his hands together. "This will be absolutely perfect." But before Gimpy could say more a loud buzzing began to fill the room and the image started to become wobbly. "The hell?" said Gimpy in confusion. Sparks began to shoot out of the generator, and the crowd quickly moved away from it. The buzz changed briefly into a loud whine before the holographic Gimpy winked out and a thin stream of smoke began to drift out of the generator.

Billy blushed in embarrassment as everyone stared at him. "Sorry," he said sheepishly. He reached into one of his pants pockets and produced an envelope. "They sent along this letter in case we had problems." He handed it to Gimpy.

Gimpy opened the envelope and pulled out a typewritten note. "Hmmm, it says here that the unit, being a prototype, may have problems." He read a bit further, and his face twisted into an angry sneer. "It also says that the unit has a predicted mean time between failures of 6 minutes and 3.2156 seconds!!" He threw the letter to the ground in disgust. "In other words, its useless for our plans!"

Mump walked quickly into the room. "Sir, Franklin has arrived. He's brought along his
solution to the problem."

"Good," Gimpy said wearily. "Hopefully it's better than the mass hypnosis idea we just discussed."

The skinny blond walked in, pushing a covered form in front of him on a small, wheeled platform. "I've got the thing right here!" he announced confidently. He reached up and whipped off the sheet covering his creation. "I call it...the Gimpybot," he said dramatically.

The group looked at the robotic duplicate of Gimpy. "Kinda crude isn't it?" asked someone.

Mump nodded in agreement. "Yes, you can see the joints for the jaw for example."

Franklin stuck his hands into the pockets of his corduroy pants and shrugged. "I'm working on a budget. Besides, it was originally designed to be a duplicate of Darth Vader."

"Well, I guess sacrifices must be made," said Gimpy sadly. After all, what could be more wonderful than a robotic tribute to the beloved Lord of the Sith?

Franklin pulled up the sweater the robot was wearing, opened a small panel, and slipped what looked like an old video game cartridge into a slot. "It operates via programs encoded onto these cartridges." He pressed a button inside the opening, and shut the panel. "I've inserted a simple test program."

A series of beeps issued from the machine, and it slowly opened its eyes. It then began to take a look around the room. It raised its arms stiffly straight out in front of itself and walked off the platform. "WE-ARE-THE-DALEKS!" it shouted mechanically. "WE-WILL-EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!"

"W-where did that cartridge come from?" asked Mump nervously.

"Um, they were cartridges from a videogame console called Supervision that never hit the market," replied Franklin. "That one was originally for a game called Dr. Who Versus the Daleks 2150."

Gimpy stared at his robotic double, which was beginning to march towards the assembled computer nerds, still shouting about Daleks and extermination. "In that case, gentlemen, I have one suggestion. RUN!!!!" Taking Gimpy's advice they charged out the door in a fearful mass, the Gimpybot hot on their heels.

Gimpy slumped in his chair in defeat. Every idea they had come up with had turned out to have a fatal flaw. Plans to use clones, mind control rays, and psychic projection had all been ruled out as too dangerous, too expensive, or not being possible without studying for years with the ancient masters of Shamballa. Even the best one, courtesy of a friend of Mump's, a device that made masks that exactly duplicated a person's features, had failed. The masks only lasted an hour before deteriorating, and the material cost $200 a mask, so it would cost several thousand dollars a week to use them.

"What am I going to do?" asked Gimpy plaintively as he watched the last of his disappointed minions walk slowly out the door.

Nitz clicked his mouse on the bookmark for Gimpy's webcam. "Hey, Gimpy," Nitz said as Gimpy's face appeared. Gimpy looked haggard, his large eyes bloodshot. "Long night huh?"

Gimpy nodded. "Yes, I was up very late trying to solve my...problem."

Nitz nodded. "Yeah, about that. I'm sorry, Gimpy. I know I...."

Gimpy waved a hand to cut Nitz off. "No, you were right, Nitz, you were right."

"So, how did you end up in this mess anyways?"

"I don't know. Maybe it was because no one was making me go out anymore. My parents weren't around to nag me, and the professors didn't make a big deal out of it. I was suddenly free to do whatever I wanted to, without interference." He smiled a bit. "And then I found out the effect I could have on others."

Nitz grinned. "Yeah, that bunch you've got running around for you will do just about anything you ask." He chuckled. "That's a part of the problem, Gimpy. Having them at your beck and call has made you lazy, and allowed you to get away with not showing up."

Gimpy looked embarrassed. "Yeah, I guess that's true. So, what am I going to do?"

"You really don't have much choice. Either you get off your butt and show up for your classes, or you can throw away the next year until you can get reinstated." Nitz smirked. "Not to mention you'll probably have to move back in with your parents."

"Ugggh, yes," said Gimpy.

Unbeknownst to Nitz and Gimpy, as they talked their computer link was being monitored.

The young woman frowned as she watched and listened. The possibility Gimpy might have to leave Tekerson was just not acceptable. She wanted him where she could keep track of him. She intended to follow that classic piece of wisdom about keeping your enemies closer than your friends.

It wasn't as if she was attracted to him. Oh no. Not a jerk like G Prime. She just wanted to keep him around so she could pick the best time to utterly humiliate him.

At least that's what she kept telling herself.

She grabbed her mouse and opened up a program. She then began typing in a series of numbers.

Nitz frowned at his computer monitor. Gimpy's image in the video popup had started to waver. "Gimpy, are you starting to get some interference on your end?" he asked.

"Yes, I am," Gimpy replied, a frown on his face. As the pair watched their respective monitors their screens faded to white, and Gimpy's G Prime logo appeared. A red circle then surrounded the logo, and a diagonal slash cut across it, followed by the logo morphing into a logo very familiar to Gimpy, accompanied by loud cackling. "SHE PRIME!!" he shouted angrily.

"Sooo, poor widdle Gimpy is afraid of the big bad classroom," she taunted. "Maybe you should consider changing your name from Gimpy to Wimpy."

"Why you...." Gimpy growled as he frantically tried to get a tracking program he had come up with to lock onto She Prime's location.

"Oh well, I'm sure everything will be all right if you get kicked out," she continued. "I'm sure Spud will do a fine job of running things in your place."

"Spud? SPUD!? You think that Star Trek obsessed fool can replace the great G Prime?"

She Prime cackled again. "Of course. At least he can leave his room for more than five minutes at a time!" The She Prime logo started to fade out on Gimpy's monitor. "Well, gotta go. See you around. Or not see you around, whichever the case may be." Gimpy's screen returned to its normal Boba Fett background, with the webcam window once more showing Nitz's face.

Gimpy smashed his fists into his keyboard in frustration. Another few seconds and he would have located her! "Damn her! Well, she'd better watch out! I'll show her who the man is around here!" he shouted, shaking his fist.

Boy, she sure got him worked up thought Nitz as Gimpy continued to rant.

"So you're really going to do it, sir," said Mump as he marched beside Gimpy.

"Yes indeed, my loyal second in command. I will be attending classes in person as much as possible from now on." His face took on a determined look. "It will mean sacrificing some freedom on my part, but I will do it for the good of us all, and to show certain naysayers that G Prime is not to be trifled with."

"And we'll all be right behind you all the way!" exclaimed Mump as they walked into their first class of the day.

Neither young man noticed the wide grin that appeared on the face of a young woman in a black trench coat sitting in a back corner of the classroom. "Success," she said softly as she watched Gimpy sit down.