Snake Tries Anime

(Snake obviously lives with his best friend, Otacon. Being the good guy he is (although an old fart) I decided to see him try different animes, but he can never get the respect of Otacon. Enjoy!)

Hal sighed as he huffed up the steps, trying to get to the third floor of the apartment. Snake should be getting the groceries, and he should be monitoring for the Patriots (V.I.A downloading hentai.). He was NOT made to climb up these steps, and walk three miles to the nearest store. Although living in a Japanese residential district, with plenty of stores nearby, Snake ALWAYS insisted that he go to the American thrift-store for cigs.

"Yeesh. 'The brand of smokes I want is important, damnit! They don't all taste the same ya' know!' God, what an asshole…" Said Otacon, not really meaning it. He pretty much idolized Snake, and the two connected. Just that Otacon made the weapons of war and Snake, very technically, WAS the weapon of war. Eh, who cares, he was a decent guy….mostly.

Suddenly, as Otacon reached for the door, it suddenly burst open, sending him onto his ass and making the random foodstuffs (Smoked Squid, Cabbage Patties, Pokemon Candy that was on sale) fly about onto the shag-carpet covered landing.

"What in the hell?! Snake, watch where your going!"

Snake sighed a bit and rolled his eyes. "Sorry, look. I had to tell you, I decided, for you, to look for an anime that I would really enjoy….also, with Meryl going to Law School and all…."

"Wow…Dave….you actually did that….sniff for me?!"

To be honest, Snake just did it so they could agree on what to watch and not have each other kill themselves in the process one day. Snake nodded slowly.

"Yeap, I did. And im pretty sure your gonna like it too." Snake said with a slightly defeated voice. He took a sip of his beer and picked up his cigarettes from the floor.

"Ooooohhh…..Smoked Squid. That stuff is pretty damn good, if I do say so myself…."

Otacon stood up, dusted himself off, and then walked past Snake and took a gander at the T.V screen.

"Hmm…Snake, mind changing the channel? I hate DBZ."

Snake stopped, his Zippo lighter about to be set off when he turned around with a look of 'Oh hell no.'

Snake had spent days looking through all of the anime titles out there. Escaflowne sounded too much like a Sinus medicine. Armitage was pretty cool until he found out the main character (a girl who he actually admitted he thought was pretty damn sexy) was a robot, which left him at an awkward state. Gundam for obvious reasons was no good (He was still getting calls from the neighbors about a lunatic screaming "JESUS SAVE ME, IT'S GONNA BLOW UP THE FREE WORLD!" and then explosions.) The list went on and on and on until he finally, FINALY, found an anime he liked.

And Otacon hated it.

Snake stomped into the room while screaming and waving his arms "What the hell is wrong with this?!" He said, not really caring about the name.

Otacon sighed loudly. "Because DBZ, every single time, is the exact same thing. I don't even see why they bother with new storylines. The first Dragonball, now that was a good Anime! At least it's stories had some difference from the last seasons!"

If Snake were an anime character, he would be having the popping vein thing on his head. Snake then composed himself, and then sighed, popping out the tape.

"Fine, I got a better one anyway." Snake said, as he popped the tape in.

Snake then started humming to the theme, finding this whole process to be incredibly dorky, but kept it going for his friend.

"Jesus Christ, Snake, you have absolutely NO taste!"

Otacon started laughing.

"What?!"

"SPEED RACER?!"

"What's wrong with speed racer?!"

"Ohidontknowmabeyitisbecausethecharicterstalksofastyoucanhardlyhearthem! Hoi, Hoi!" Said Otacon in a parody. Snake had to admit, the dubbing was worse than a Bruce Lee film.

"Ok, ok, I got it!"

Snake then tore that tape out, and tossed it over his shoulder. He then smirked and put in another tape.

"here is one I know you will like! I even liked this and I didn't know it was an anime!"

"Geez, Snake. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles isint an anime."

"GOD-DAMNIT!!!!" Snake said, grabbing another tape.

"Erm…Snake?"

"NO, IM GONNA FIND SOMETHING WE BOTH LIKE, OR IM GOING TO DIE TRYING!!!"

"Er…its ok, really."

"NO, MUST FIND ANIME THAT BOTH OF US LIKE!!!"

Otacon ducked as a copy of "Love Hina" flew at his head. He then smiled nervously.

"I GOT IT! POKEMON!!"

"SNAKE, IT'S FINE, REALLY!!!"

The tape started up. Otacon was starting to really suspect his friend lost his mind. Snake then started to sing along to the theme song, and that worried Otacon to no end.

When the episode actually started, Snake then grabbed Otacon by the collar and lifted him up off his feet, starting to shake him like a frustrated baby sitter would a baby.

"FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, OTACON, TELL ME YOU LIKE POKEMON!!!!"

Otacon hung up there for a couple of seconds.

"….It's a kids show Snake…."

Snake, who was still holding Otacon, had a look of absolute shock as he dropped his friend down onto the floor. He then walked over to the T.V and pulled the tape out. He then grabbed a Mossberg 500 from the closet, put the tape in his mouth, and calked the hunting shotgun. He then started to pick up the other tapes.

"Snake….where are you going?"

"Im gonna go return the tapes…."

(Short Fan fic, made to so you understand what I believe Snake has to go through living with an Otaku. Hope you liked!)